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Martine's Hand-book of Etiquette, and Guide to True Politeness   By:

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MARTINE'S

HAND BOOK OF ETIQUETTE,

AND

GUIDE TO TRUE POLITENESS.

A COMPLETE MANUAL FOR THOSE WHO DESIRE TO UNDERSTAND THE RULES OF GOOD BREEDING, THE CUSTOMS OF GOOD SOCIETY, AND TO AVOID INCORRECT AND VULGAR HABITS,

CONTAINING

Clear and Comprehensive Directions for Correct Manners, Dress, and Conversation ;

Instructions for Good Behavior at Dinner Parties, and the Table, with Hints on the Art of Carving and Taking Wine at Table ;

Together with the Etiquette of the Ball and Assembly Room, Evening Parties ;

Deportment in the Street and when Travelling ;

And the Usages to be Observed when Visiting or Receiving Calls .

TO WHICH IS ADDED

THE ETIQUETTE OF COURTSHIP, MARRIAGE, DOMESTIC DUTIES, AND FIFTY SIX RULES TO BE OBSERVED IN GENERAL SOCIETY.

BY ARTHUR MARTINE.

NEW YORK: DICK & FITZGERALD, PUBLISHERS.

Entered according to Act of Congress, in the year 1866, by

DICK & FITZGERALD,

In the Clerk's office of the District Court of the United States for the Southern District of New York.

CONTENTS.

General Observations 5

The Art of Conversation 8

General Rules for Conversation 24

On Dress 48

Introductions 57

Letters of Introduction 61

Dinner Parties 63

Habits at Table 67

Wine at Table 74

Carving 82

Etiquette of the Ball and Assembly Room 93

Evening Parties 104

Visiting 113

Street Etiquette 127

Traveling 133

Marriage 136

Domestic Etiquette and Duties 144

On General Society 154

GENERAL OBSERVATIONS.

Politeness has been defined as an "artificial good nature;" but it would be better said that good nature is natural politeness . It inspires us with an unremitting attention, both to please others and to avoid giving them offence. Its code is a ceremonial, agreed upon and established among mankind, to give each other external testimonies of friendship or respect. Politeness and etiquette form a sort of supplement to the law, which enables society to protect itself against offences which the law cannot touch. For instance, the law cannot punish a man for habitually staring at people in an insolent and annoying manner, but etiquette can banish such an offender from the circles of good society, and fix upon him the brand of vulgarity. Etiquette consists in certain forms, ceremonies, and rules which the principle of politeness establishes and enforces for the regulation of the manners of men and women in their intercourse with each other.

Many unthinking persons consider the observance of etiquette to be nonsensical and unfriendly, as consisting of unmeaning forms, practiced only by the silly and the idle; an opinion which arises from their not having reflected on the reasons that have led to the establishment of certain rules indispensable to the well being of society, and without which, indeed, it would inevitably fall to pieces, and be destroyed.

The true aim of politeness, is to make those with whom you associate as well satisfied with themselves as possible. It does not, by any means, encourage an impudent self importance in them, but it does whatever it can to accommodate their feelings and wishes in social intercourse. Politeness is a sort of social benevolence, which avoids wounding the pride, or shocking the prejudices of those around you.

The principle of politeness is the same among all nations, but the ceremonials which etiquette imposes differ according to the taste and habits of various countries. For instance, many of the minor rules of etiquette at Paris differ from those at London; and at New York they may differ from both Paris and London... Continue reading book >>




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