Our Deportment Or the Manners, Conduct and Dress of the Most Refined Society   By: John H. Young

Our Deportment Or the Manners, Conduct and Dress of the Most Refined Society by John H. Young is a fascinating guide to etiquette that will transport you to a time long gone. Although first published in 1882, this book still holds relevance today, providing a glimpse into the formalities and expectations of society during the Victorian era.

One of the standout aspects of this book is the level of detail it provides on various social situations and expected behaviors. From courtship to wedding ceremonies, everyday visits to evening social functions, the author leaves no stone unturned. Young’s meticulousness is evident throughout, as he covers a wide range of topics including dress codes, table manners, conversation etiquette, and even the proper way to express condolences. The sheer breadth of information can be overwhelming at times, but it also allows readers to immerse themselves fully in the intricacies of Victorian social norms.

What sets this book apart from others of its kind is Young’s engaging writing style. Rather than simply prescribing a set of rules, he often includes anecdotes and personal stories to illustrate his points. These anecdotes not only entertain readers but also provide valuable insights into the consequences of breaching societal expectations. Young’s passion for proper conduct shines through his words, making the guidance feel relatable and encouraging readers to strive for refinement.

It is worth mentioning that some aspects of this book, particularly those related to class and gender, may be obsolete or even offensive by today’s standards. However, it is crucial to view these sections within their historical context, acknowledging that societal values have evolved significantly since the Victorian era. While it may not be directly applicable to modern times, the book offers a fascinating opportunity to understand the social dynamics and attitudes of a bygone era.

One drawback of this book is its rather formal language, which can be dense and challenging to read at times, making it less accessible for a general audience. However, for readers with a genuine interest in history, etiquette, or both, this book provides an invaluable resource, offering a nostalgic window into the past.

In conclusion, Our Deportment Or the Manners, Conduct and Dress of the Most Refined Society by John H. Young is an enthralling guide to Victorian etiquette. Its comprehensive coverage of social situations combined with the author’s engaging writing style makes for an enlightening and enjoyable read. While it is not without its flaws, this book remains a significant resource for those seeking a deeper understanding of the social customs and expectations of the Victorian era.

First Page:

No one subject is of more importance to people generally than a knowledge of the rules, usages and ceremonies of good society, which are commonly expressed by the word "Etiquette." Its necessity is felt wherever men and women associate together, whether in the city, village, or country town, at home or abroad. To acquire a thorough knowledge of these matters, and to put that knowledge into practice with perfect ease and self complacency, is what people call good breeding. To display an ignorance of them, is to subject the offender to the opprobrium of being ill bred... Continue reading book >>