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Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 98, June 14 1890   By:

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PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI

VOLUME 98, JUNE 14TH 1890

edited by Sir Francis Burnand

[Illustration: MAXIMS FOR THE BAR. No. VI.

"Never miss a chance of ingratiating yourself with the Jury, even at the expense of the Judge." (An opportunity often occurs after Lunch.)]

"GOOD OLD GRACE!"

( Doggerel on "The Doctor," by an "Old Duffer." )

"Dr. GRACE, who seemed to forget his lameness, played with great vigour and dash, and his cuts and drives possessed all their old brilliancy." The Times, on the exciting finish in the Cricket Match between the M.C.C. and the Australians, June 3, 1890.

One hundred and eleven runs, and eighty five minutes to make 'em in, And with TURNER and FERRIS to trundle as fast as they could pitch and break 'em in! And it looked any odds on MURDOCH'S men contriving to make a draw of it; But Cricket, my lads, is a curious game, and uncertainty seems the sole law of it. So they sent in GRACE and SHUTER to start. Well, the Doctor is now called "a veteran," But at forty two when he's on the job 'tisn't easy to pick out a better 'un. And he "spanked for four," like a lad once more, and he cut and he drove like winking; Though his leg was lame, he forgot that same, and he "played the game" without shrinking. And Surrey's SHUTER he did his part, and so did Notts' GUNN, Sir, Though he might have chucked the game away when the Doctor he managed to out run, Sir. It was hard, you see, upon W. G. in that way to lose his wicket, But all the same he had won the game, and had played superlative Cricket. Forty three to make, and forty five minutes! But GRACE and GUNN were equal to it; And a win, with a quarter of an hour in hand, was the satisfactory sequel to it. The Australians played a manly game, without any dawdling or shirking; And if they didn't avoid defeat why it wasn't for want of hard working. But the stiff legged "Doctor" who forced the game in the most judgmatical fashion, And forgot his leg and his "forty year" odd, full flushed with a Cricketer's passion! Why he's the chap who deserves a shout. Bravo, brave "W. G," Sir. And when you next are on the job, may the "Duffer" be there to see, Sir!

DEVELOPING HAWARDEN.

"The locality is extremely healthy, and Hawarden will probably become a large residential place, and a centre of mining industry." Mr. Gladstone's Evidence before the Commissioners for Welsh Intermediate Education.

Monday. Wood cutting. Inconvenient having so many villas built all round park. Inhabitants inspect everything I do. Nasty little boys (whom I can see over their garden wall) shout "Yah!" and wave large primrose wreath. Irritating. Perhaps due to healthiness of air. Retire to another part of the demesne. Heavens! what is that erection? Looks like a Grand Stand, in a private garden, crowded with people. It is! Invited (by owner of garden) specially to view me and (I hear afterwards) my "celebrated wood cutting performance," at a shilling a head. Disgusted. Go in.

Tuesday. Down local coal mine. Interesting to have one at Park gates. Explain to colliers principle of the Davy lamp. Colliers seem attentive, Ask me at the end for "a trifle to drink my health with." Don't they know I am opposed to Endowment of Public houses? Yes, "but they aren't," they reply. Must invite WILFRID LAWSON to Hawarden.

Wednesday. Curious underground rumblings. Wall of Castle develops huge crack. What is it? A dynamite plot? Can SALISBURY have hired ? HERBERT comes in, and tells me the proprietor of Hawarden Salt Mine has just sent his compliments; with a request that I would "shore up" the Castle. Otherwise "he is afraid it may fall in on his workmen." Impudence! Why can't they dig under Eaton Hall instead?

Thursday... Continue reading book >>


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