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Reflections of a Bachelor Girl By: Helen Rowland (1876-) |
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THE average man looks on matrimony as a hitching post where he can tie a
woman and leave her until he comes home nights. STRANGE, how joyfully a man will pay a lawyer five hundred dollars for
untying the knot that he begrudged paying a clergyman fifty dollars for
tying.
REFLECTIONS of A BACHELOR GIRL By HELEN ROWLAND Decorated by HENRY S. EDDY "Just once more" is the Devil's best argument. [Illustration] NEW YORK
DODGE PUBLISHING COMPANY
220 East 23d Street [Illustration]
Copyright, 1909, by
DODGE PUBLISHING COMPANY [Reflections of a Bachelor Girl] A MAN buttons a woman's dress up the back with almost the same grace and
alacrity that a woman displays in climbing a barbed wire fence. [Illustration]
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR GIRL
"JUST once more" is the Devil's best argument. VARIETY is the spice of love. THE only people who believe in a personal devil, nowadays, are the ones
who are married to that kind. THE girl who marries for money is bought; but the girl who marries for
love is sold. A WISE lover, like a good cook, is one who knows when the fire is out. ALIMONY is the price of peace. IN marriage, the love light so often goes out as soon as the gas bills
begin to come in. [Illustration] THE only way to be happy with a husband is to learn to be happy without
him most of the time. LOVE is just the shine on the jewel of matrimony; but, after all, the
shine on a jewel is the whole thing. A MAN firmly believes that, if he can only keep his wife in the straight
and narrow path, he can go out and zig zag all over the downward one
without falling from grace. A GIRL is never so surprised when a man proposes to her as he is. LOVE doesn't really "make the world go 'round," it only makes us so
dizzy that everything seems to be going round. ENNUI is "that tired feeling" that a girl has when the right man doesn't
show up and the wrong one does. [Illustration] STRANGE, how joyfully a man will pay a lawyer five hundred dollars for
untying the knot that he begrudged paying a clergyman fifty dollars for
tying. WHEN a girl marries, she exchanges the attentions of all the other men
of her acquaintance for the inattention of just one. IT gives a girl silver threads among the gold to marry her ardent
admirer and find out afterward that she has tied herself to a
life critic. AS FAR as men are concerned, a woman's reputation for brains is worse
than no reputation at all. ALAS, if husbands were only like sewing machines, and we could have them
sent up on trial! [Illustration] KISSING a girl, without first telling her that you love her, is as small
and mean as letting a salesman take you for a free ride in an automobile
when you have no intention of buying it. DIVORCE is the "Great Divide," over which many men think they will pass
into Heaven. A MAN can never be made to understand why a woman will pay fifty dollars
for a hat containing ten dollars worth of material and forty dollars
worth of style. YOUTH will be youth; a young man chases temptation, folly, and chorus
girls as naturally as a kitten chases its tail. FLINGING yourself at a man's head is like flinging a bone at a cat; it
doesn't fascinate him, it frightens him. [Illustration] MEN say they admire a woman with high ideals and principles; but it's
the kind with high heels and dimples that a wife hesitates to introduce
to her husband. MARRIAGE is the black coffee that a man takes to settle him after the
love feast. LOVE is the feeling that makes a man turn on the hot water when he meant
to light the gas, go hunting for a collar when what he wanted was a pair
of socks, shave every day, and forget whether or not he has had any
lunch. HAPPINESS is at high tide at the full of the honeymoon. SOMEHOW, a man who has been thrown over always lands on his knees to
another girl. [Illustration] A CONFIRMED bachelor girl is one who hasn't married yet... Continue reading book >>
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