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Bill Nye's Funniest Thoughts

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By: (1850-1896)

Bill Nye was a famous American humor columnist in the middle 1800's. He said "We can never be a nation of snobs so long as we are willing to poke fun at ourselves." And he did exactly that in hundreds of newspaper columns that were later collected into books. This is a selection of just 35 of the most humorous, wry and downright funny cogitations of his, written of course in the somewhat convoluted style common in the 19th century which just adds to their flavor in my opinion. The selection process was rigorous: only those that made me laugh, giggle or snort are included.

First Page:

REMARKS

By BILL NYE.

(EDGAR W. NYE.)

Ah Sin was his name; And I shall not deny, In regard to the same, What the name might imply: But his smile it was pensive and childlike, As I frequent remarked to Bill Nye.

Bret Harte.

With over one hundred and fifty illustrations, by J.H. SMITH.

[Illustration]

[Illustration: Bill Nye]

DIRECTIONS.

This book is not designed specially for any one class of people. It is for all. It is a universal repository of thought. Some of my best thoughts are contained in this book. Whenever I would think a thought that I thought had better remain unthought, I would omit it from this book. For that reason the book is not so large as I had intended. When a man coldly and dispassionately goes at it to eradicate from his work all that may not come up to his standard of merit, he can make a large volume shrink till it is no thicker than the bank book of an outspoken clergyman.

This is the fourth book that I have published in response to the clamorous appeals of the public. Whenever the public got to clamoring too loudly for a new book from me and it got so noisy that I could not ignore it any more, I would issue another volume... Continue reading book >>


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