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The Roycroft Dictionary Concocted by Ali Baba and the Bunch on Rainy Days.   By: (1856-1915)

The Roycroft Dictionary Concocted by Ali Baba and the Bunch on Rainy Days. by Elbert Hubbard

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CONCOCTED by Ali Baba and the Bunch on RAINY DAYS



ADVERTISING: The education of the public as to who you are, where you are, and what you have to offer in way of skill, talent or commodity. The only man who should not advertise is the man who has nothing to offer the world in way of commodity or service.

ABEL: The first squealer.

ABHORRENCE: 1. A pronounced feeling of dislike in the presence of what is superior or unattainable. 2. To discover one's real self and to slander somebody or something else in revenge. 3. A form of hate that suffers from mal de mer .

ASBESTOS: 1. The white hope of the damned. 2. A specially prepared paper upon which The Philistine is printed.

ARSON: To be careless in the use of fire. (General Sherman was at times more or less careless in the use of fire on his March to the Sea. Hon. Henry W. Grady. )

AERONAUT: A person who goes up in order to come down. Hence, a meta physician.

ABNORMAL: To have intelligence, character or genius; to be less stupid than one's neighbor; to be better than the worst; to be one's self. E. g. , the writer of these lines.

ABODE: 1. A place where one cleans one's teeth and occasionally sleeps. 2. A long counter with a gutter and a rail at the bottom over which one is served with any liquid in a glass. 3. Dwelling, fireside (obsolete in this sense). 4. A grave.

ABNEGATION: A plan for securing the thing in the easiest and surest way.

ACADEMIC: 1. Of, or pertaining to, fossils; vegetative; parasitic; the opposite of change, viable, evolution. 2. Relating to a society that promotes the love of the static and the immobile. 3. Apish, parrot like, phonographic.

ADIEU: A prayer of thanksgiving uttered at parting.

ACQUAINTANCE: Any one we bow to politely at the opera or shake hands with warmly in a barroom, but whom we would kick out of our homes. Hence, any one who has refused us a loan.

ACT: 1. Thought in motion. 2. An actor who says he gets three thousand a week.

ABYSS: 1. The measureless gulf between literature and the American magazine. 2. The distance between a thinker and an editorial writer.

ARMY: A body of humanitarians that seeks to impress on another body of men the beauty of non resistance, by exterminating them.

ABORIGINE: 1. A natural, unaffected person; one who has no conscience, who is honest, upright, and always at war. 2. A Deist, a Pantheist, who sees God in everything and feels His presence everywhere, even in his cannibalistic rites; hence, the first thinker in any country. 3. One who hates civilization and the Ladies' Hum Journal . 4. Any one who is mulcted, robbed, murdered, butchered, betrayed, in the name of progress.

ANARCHIST: 1. A Christian dilettante; one who casts a shadow on tomorrow while waiting for the Greek Kalends. 2. A mouther of sublime inanities. 3. One who maps and surveys the air and constructs dainty Utopias with the building blocks quarried from his unbelievable credulity. 4. In the insane asylum of idealists, a man who imagines himself to be God. 5. A militant bourgeois who has deserted both Rome and Reason because he can not stand competition.

AMERICAN PLAN: A scheme for shortening human life through overeating.

ANANIAS: 1. The first ad writer. 2. Any person who adapts the truth to his needs. 3. An ancient Saint George who slew the dragon Truth hence, any popular hero or revealer who displays his grinders... Continue reading book >>

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