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A Woman Named Smith   By: (1879-1932)

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First Page:

A WOMAN NAMED SMITH

by

MARIE CONWAY OEMLER

Author of Slippy McGee , etc.

Grosset & Dunlap Publishers New York

1919

[Frontispiece illustration: "Sophy," he said, "I have found the lost key of Hynds House"]

To

ELIZABETH HEYWARD OEMLER

Sometimes my Little Girl.

When you were yet an Awful Baby, And bawled o' bed time, I said "Maybe It is not best to spank or scold her: Suppose a fairy tale were told her?" And gave you then, to my undoing, The wolf Red Riding Hood pursuing; Sang Mother Goose her artless rhyming; Showed Jack the Magic Beanstalk climbing; Three Little Pigs were so appealing, You set up sympathetic squealing! Then, Bitsybet, you had your mother You bawled until I told another!

The Awful Baby's gone. Here lately You bear your little self sedately. You've shed your rompers; you want dresses Prinked out with frillies; fluff your tresses; Delight your daddy, aunts, and mother; And sisterly set straight your brother. Your bib and tucker days abolished, Your manners and your nails are polished. One baby trait remains, thank glory! You're still a glutton for a story. Still, Bitsybet, you beg another: So here's one for you from

YOUR MOTHER.

CONTENTS

CHAPTER

I THE SCARLET WITCH DEPARTS II AND ARIEL MAKES MUSIC III THE DEAR LITTLE GOD! IV THE HYNDSES OF HYNDS HOUSE V "THY NEIGHBOR AS THYSELF" VI GLAMOURY VII A BRIGHT PARTICULAR STAR VIII PEACOCKS AND IVORY IX THE JUDGMENT OF SPRING X THE FOREST OF ARDEN XI THE JINNEE INTERVENES XII MAN PROPOSES XIII FIRES OF YESTERDAY XIV THE TALISMAN XV THE HEART OF HYNDS HOUSE XVI THE DEVILL HIS RAINBOW XVII ON THE KNEES OF THE GODS XVIII THE GREATEST GIFT XIX DEEP WATERS XX HARBOR

CHARACTERS

SOPHY: A woman named Smith.

ALICIA GAINES: Flower o' the Peach.

NICHOLAS JELNIK: Peacocks and Ivory.

DOCTOR RICHARD GEDDES: Coeur de Lion.

THE AUTHOR: Himself.

THE SECRETARY: A Pleasant Person.

MISS EMMELINE PHELPS PARSONS: of Boston, Massachusetts.

MISS MARTHA HOPKINS: "Clothed in White Samite."

JUDGE GATCHELL: The Law.

SCHMETZ AND RIEDRIECH: Workmen and Visionaries.

THE JINNEE: A Son of the Prophet.

SOPHRONISBA SCARLETT: "The Scarlett Witch."

THE HYNDSES OF HYNDS HOUSE.

PAYING GUESTS.

THE PEOPLE OF HYNDSVILLE, SOUTH CAROLINA.

MARY MAGDALEN; QUEEN OF SHEEBA; FERNOLIA: Important Persons.

BORIS: A Russian Wolfhound.

THE BLACK FAMILY: A Witch's Cat's Kittens.

BEAUTIFUL DOG: Last but not Least.

A WOMAN NAMED SMITH

CHAPTER I

THE SCARLETT WITCH DEPARTS

If it had been humanly possible for Great Aunt Sophronisba Scarlett to lug her place in Hyndsville, South Carolina, along with her into the next world, plump it squarely in the middle of the Elysian Fields, plaster it over with "No Trespassing" signs, and then settle herself down to a blissful eternity of serving writs upon the angels for flying over her fences without permission, and setting the saved by the ears in general, she would have done so and felt that heaven was almost as desirable a place as South Carolina. But as even she couldn't impose her will upon the next world, and there was nobody in this one she hated less than she did me possibly because she had never laid eyes on me she willed me Hynds House and what was left of the Hynds fortune; tying this string to her bequest: I must occupy Hynds House within six months, and I couldn't rent it, or attempt to sell it, without forfeiture of the entire estate... Continue reading book >>




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