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THE LIFE EVERLASTING

A REALITY OF ROMANCE

BY MARIE CORELLI

AUTHOR OF THELMA, ETC.





CONTENTS

          AUTHOR'S PROLOGUE
     I.   THE HEROINE BEGINS HER STORY
    II.   THE FAIRY SHIP
   III.   THE ANGEL OF A DREAM
    IV.   A BUNCH OF HEATHER
     V.   AN UNEXPECTED MEETING
    VI.   RECOGNITION
   VII.   MEMORIES
  VIII.   VISIONS
    IX.   DOUBTFUL DESTINY
     X.   STRANGE ASSOCIATIONS
    XI.   ONE WAY OF LOVE
   XII.   A LOVE-LETTER
  XIII.   THE HOUSE OF ASELZION
   XIV.   CROSS AND STAR
    XV.   A FIRST LESSON
   XVI.   SHADOW AND SOUND
  XVII.   THE MAGIC BOOK
 XVIII.   DREAMS WITHIN A DREAM
   XIX.   THE UNKNOWN DEEP
    XX.   INTO THE LIGHT




THE LIFE EVERLASTING

A REALITY OF ROMANCE




AUTHOR'S PROLOGUE


In the Gospels of the only Divine Friend this world has ever had or
ever will have, we read of a Voice, a 'Voice in the Wilderness.'
There have been thousands of such Voices;--most of them ineffectual.
All through the world's history their echoes form a part of the
universal record, and from the very beginning of time they have
sounded forth their warnings or entreaties in vain. The Wilderness
has never cared to hear them. The Wilderness does not care to hear
them now.

Why, then, do I add an undesired note to the chorus of rejected
appeal? How dare I lift up my voice in the Wilderness, when other
voices, far stronger and sweeter, are drowned in the laughter of
fools and the mockery of the profane? Truly, I do not know. But I am
sure that I am not moved by egotism or arrogance. It is simply out
of love and pity for suffering human kind that I venture to become
another Voice discarded--a voice which, if heard at all, may only
serve to awaken the cheap scorn and derision of the clowns of the
piece.

Yet, should this be so, I would not have it otherwise, I have never
at any time striven to be one with the world, or to suit my speech
pliantly to the conventional humour of the moment. I am often
attacked, yet am not hurt; I am equally often praised, and am not
elated. I have no time to attend to the expression of opinions,
which, whether good or bad, are to me indifferent. And whatever pain
I have felt or feel, in experiencing human malice, has been, and is,
in the fact that human malice should exist at all,--not for its
attempted wrong towards myself. For I, personally speaking, have not
a moment to waste among the mere shadows of life which are not Life
itself. I follow the glory,--not the gloom.

So whether you, who wander in darkness of your own making, care to
come towards the little light which leads me onward, or whether you
prefer to turn away from me altogether into your self-created darker
depths, is not my concern. I cannot force you to bear me company.
God Himself cannot do that, for it is His Will and Law that each
human soul shall shape its own eternal future. No one mortal can
make the happiness or salvation of another. I, like yourselves, am
in the 'Wilderness,'--but I know that there are ways of making it
blossom like the rose! Yet,--were all my heart and all my love
outpoured upon you, I could not teach you the Divine transfiguring
charm,--unless you, equally with all your hearts and all your love,
resolutely and irrevocably WILLED to learn.

Nevertheless, despite your possible indifference,--your often sheer
inertia--I cannot pass you by, having peace and comfort for myself
without at least offering to share that peace and comfort with you.
Many of you are very sad,--and I would rather you were happy. Your
ways of living are trivial and unsatisfactory--your so-called
'pleasant' vices lead you into unforeseen painful perplexities--your
ideals of what may be best for your own enjoyment and advancement
fall far short of your dreams,--your amusements pall on your over-
wearied senses,--your youth hurries away like a puff of thistledown
on the wind,--and you spend all your time feverishly in trying to
live without understanding Life. Life, the first of all things, the
essence of all things,--Life which is yours to hold and to keep, and
to RE-CREATE over and over again in your own persons,--this precious
jewel you throw away, and when it falls out of your possession by
your own act, you think such an end was necessary and inevitable.
Poor unhappy mortals! So self-sufficient, so proud, so ignorant!
Like some foolish rustic, who, finding a diamond, sees no difference
between it and a bit of glass, you, with the whole Universe sweeping
around you in mighty beneficent circles of defensive, protective and
ever re-creative power,--power which is yours to use and to control-
-imagine that the entire Cosmos is the design of mere blind
unintelligent Chance, and that the Divine Life which thrills within
you serves no purpose save to lead you to Death! Most wonderful and
most pitiful it is that such folly, such blasphemy should still
prevail,--and that humanity should still ascribe to the Almighty
Creator less wisdom and less love than that with which He has
endowed His creatures. For the very first lesson in the beginning of
knowledge is that Life is the essential Being of God, and that each
individual intelligent outcome of Life is deathless as God Himself.

The 'Wilderness' is wide,--and within it we all find ourselves,--
some wandering far astray--some crouching listlessly among shadows,
too weary to move at all--others, sauntering along in idle
indifference, now and then vaguely questioning how soon and where
the journey will end,--and few ever discovering that it is not a
'Wilderness' at all, but a garden of sweet sights and sounds, where
every day should be a glory and every night a benediction. For when
the veil of mere Appearances has been lifted we are no longer
deceived into accepting what Seems for what Is. The Reality of Life
is Happiness;--the Delusion of Life, which we ourselves create by
improper balance and imperfect comprehension of our own powers, must
needs cause Sorrow, because in such self-deception we only dimly see
the truth, just as a person born blind may vaguely guess at the
beauty of bright day. But for the Soul that has found Itself, there
are no more misleading lights or shadows between its own
everlastingness and the everlastingness of God.

All the world over there are religions of various kinds, more or
less suited to the various types and races of humanity. Most of
these forms of faith have been evolved from the brooding brain of
Man himself, and have nothing 'divine,' in them. In the very early
ages nearly all the religious creeds were mere methods for
terrorising the ignorant and the weak--and some of them were so
revolting, so bloodthirsty and brutal, that one cannot now read of
them without a shudder of repulsion. Nevertheless, from the very
first dawn of his intelligence, man appears always to have felt the
necessity of believing in something stronger and more lasting than
himself,--and his first gropings for truth led him to evolve
desperate notions of something more cruel, more relentless, and more
wicked than himself, rather than ideals of something more beautiful,
more just, more faithful and more loving than he could be. The dawn
of Christianity brought the first glimmering suggestion that a
gospel of love and pity might be more serviceable in the end to the
needs of the world, than a ruthless code of slaughter and vengeance-
-though history shows us that the annals of Christianity itself are
stained with crime and shamed by the shedding of innocent blood.
Only in these latter days has the world become faintly conscious of
the real Force working behind and through all things--the soul of
the Divine, or the Psychic element, animating and inspiring all
visible and invisible Nature. This soul of the Divine--this Psychic
element, however, is almost entirely absent from the teaching of the
Christian creed to-day, with the result that the creed itself is
losing its power. I venture to say that a very small majority of the
millions of persons worshipping in the various forms of the
Christian Church really and truly believe what they publicly
profess. Clergy and laity alike are tainted with this worst of all
hypocrisies--that of calling God to witness their faith when they
know they are faithless. It may be asked how I dare to make such an
assertion? I dare, because I know! It would be impossible to the
people of this or any other country to honestly believe the
Christian creed, and yet continue to live as they do. Their lives
give the lie to their avowed religion, and it is this daily
spectacle of the daily life of governments, trades, professions and
society which causes me to feel that the general aspect of
Christendom at the present day, with all its Churches and solemn
observances, is one of the most painful and profound hypocrisy. You
who read this page,--(possibly with indignation) you call yourself a
Christian, no doubt. But ARE you? Do you truly think that when death
shall come to you it is really NOT death, but the simple transition
into another and better life? Do you believe in the actual
immortality of your soul, and do you realise what it means? You do?
You are quite sure? Then, do you live as one convinced of it? Are
you quite indifferent to the riches and purely material advantages
of this world?--are you as happy in poverty as in wealth, and are
you independent of social esteem? Are you bent on the very highest
and most unselfish ideals of life and conduct? I do not say you are
not; I merely ask if you ARE. If your answer is in the affirmative,
do not give the lie to your creed by your daily habits, conversation
and manners; for this is what thousands of professing Christians do,
and the clergy are by no means exempt.

I know very well, of course, that I must not expect your
appreciation, or even your attention, in matters purely spiritual.
The world is too much with you, and you become obstinate of opinion
and rooted in prejudice. Nevertheless, as I said before, this is not
my concern. Your moods are not mine, and with your prejudices I have
nothing to do. My creed is drawn from Nature--Nature, just,
invincible, yet tender--Nature, who shows us that Life, as we know
it now, at this very time and in this very world, is a blessing so
rich in its as yet unused powers and possibilities, that it may be
truly said of the greater majority of human beings that scarce one
of them has ever begun to learn HOW to live.

Shakespeare, the greatest human exponent of human nature at its best
and worst,--the profound Thinker and Artist who dealt boldly with
the facts of good and evil as they truly are,--and did not hesitate
to contrast them forcibly, without any of the deceptive 'half-tones'
of vice and virtue which are the chief stock-in-trade of such modern
authors as we may call 'degenerates,'--makes his Hamlet exclaim:--

    "What a piece of work is man!--how noble in
     reason!--how infinite in faculty!--in form and moving
     how express and admirable!--in action how like an
     angel!--in apprehension how like a god!"

Let us consider two of these designations in particular: 'How
infinite in faculty!'--and 'In apprehension how like a god!' The
sentences are prophetic, like so many of Shakespeare's utterances.
They foretell the true condition of the Soul of Man when it shall
have discovered its capabilities. 'Infinite in faculty'--that is to
say--Able to do all it shall WILL to do. There is no end to this
power,--no hindrance in either earth or heaven to its resolute
working--no stint to the life-supplies on which it may draw
unceasingly. And--'in apprehension how like a god!' Here the word
'apprehension' is used in the sense of attaining knowledge,--to
learn, or to 'apprehend' wisdom. It means, of course, that if the
Soul's capability of 'apprehending' or learning the true meaning and
use of every fact and circumstance which environs its existence,
were properly perceived and applied, then the 'Image of God' in
which the Creator made humanity, would become the veritable likeness
of the Divine.

But, as this powerful and infinite faculty of apprehension is seldom
if ever rightly understood, and as Man generally concentrates his
whole effort upon ministering to his purely material needs, utterly
ignoring and wilfully refusing to realise those larger claims which
are purely spiritual, he presents the appearance of a maimed and
imperfect object,--a creature who, having strong limbs, declines to
use the same, or who, possessing incalculable wealth, crazily
considers himself a pauper. Jesus Christ, whom we may look upon as a
human Incarnation of Divine Thought, an outcome and expression of
the 'Word' or Law of God, came to teach us our true position in the
scale of the great Creative and Progressive Purpose,--but in the
days of His coming men would not listen,--nor will they listen even
now. They say with their mouths, but they do not believe with their
hearts, that He rose from the dead,--and they cannot understand
that, as a matter of fact, He never died. seeing that death for Him
(as for all who have mastered the inward constitution and
commingling of the elements) was impossible. His real LIFE was not
injured or affected by the agony on the Cross, or by His three days'
entombment; the one was a torture to His physical frame, which to
the limited perception of those who watched Him 'die,' as they
thought, appeared like a dissolution of the whole Man,--the other
was the mere rest and silence necessary for what is called the
'miracle' of the Resurrection, but which was simply the natural
rising of the same Body, the atoms of which were re-invested and
made immortal by the imperishable Spirit which owned and held them
in being. The whole life and so-called 'death' of Christ was and is
a great symbolic lesson to mankind of the infinite power of THAT
within us which we call SOUL,--but which we may perhaps in these
scientific days term an eternal radio-activity,--capable of
exhaustless energy and of readjustment to varying conditions. Life
is all Life. There is no such thing as Death in its composition,--
and the intelligent comprehension of its endless ways and methods of
change and expression, is the Secret of the Universe.

It appears to be generally accepted that we are not to know this
Secret,--that it is too vast and deep for our limited capacities,--
and that even if we did know it, it would be of no use to us, as we
are bound hard and fast by certain natural and elemental laws over
which we have no control. Old truisms are re-stated and violently
asserted--namely, that our business is merely to be born, to live,
breed and arrange things as well as we can for those who come after
us, and then to die, and there an end,--a stupid round of existence
not one whit higher than that of the silkworm. Is it for such a
monotonous, commonplace way of life and purpose as this, that
humanity has been endowed with 'infinite faculty'? Is it for such
poor aims and ends as these that we are told in the legended account
of the beginning of things, to 'Replenish the earth and subdue it'?
There is great meaning in that command--'Subdue it!' The business of
each one of us who has come into the knowledge and possession of his
or her own Soul, is to 'subdue' the earth,--that is, to hold it and
all it contains under subjection,--not to allow Its forces, whether
interior or exterior, to subdue the Soul. But it may perhaps be
said:--"We do not yet understand all the forces with which we have
to contend, and in this way they master us." That may be so,--but if
it is so with any of you, it is quite your own fault. Your own
fault, I say,--for there is no power, human or divine, that compels
you to remain in ignorance. Each one of you has a master--talisman
and key to all locked doors. No State education can do for you what
you might do for yourselves, if you only had the WILL. It is your
own choice entirely if you elect to live in subjection to the earth,
instead of placing the earth under subjection to your dominance.

Then, again, you have been told to 'Replenish the earth'--as well as
to subdue it. In these latter days, through a cupidity as amazing as
criminal, you are not 'replenishing' so much as impoverishing the
earth, and think you that no interest will be exacted for your
reckless plunder? You mistake! You complain of the high taxes
imposed upon you by your merely material and ephemeral Governments,-
-but you forget that the Everlasting Government of all Worlds
demands an even higher rate of compensation for such wrong or
injurious uses as you make of this world, which was and is intended
to serve as a place of training for the development and perfection
of the whole human race, but which, owing to personal greed and
selfishness, is too often turned into a mere grave for the interment
of faulty civilisations.

In studying the psychic side of life it should be well and
distinctly understood that THERE IS AN EVER LIVING SPIRIT WITHIN
EACH ONE OF US;--a Spirit for which there is no limited capacity and
no unfavourable surroundings. Its capacity is infinite as God,--and
its surroundings are always made by Itself. It is its own Heaven,--
and once established within that everlasting centre, it radiates
from the Inward to the Outward, thus making its own environment, not
only now but for ever. It is its own Life,--and in the active work
of perpetually re-generating and re-creating itself, knows nothing
of Death.

                         *     *     *
                            *     *
                               *

I must now claim the indulgence of those among my readers who
possess the rare gift of patience, for anything that may seem too
personal in the following statement which I feel it almost necessary
to make on the subject of my own "psychic" creed. I am so often
asked if I believe this or that, if I am "orthodox," if I am a
sceptic, materialist or agnostic, that I should like, if possible,
to make things clear between myself and these enquirers. Therefore I
may say at once that my belief in God and the immortality of the
Soul is absolute,--but that I did not attain to the faith I hold
without hard training and bitter suffering. This need not be dwelt
upon, being past. I began to write when I was too young to know
anything of the world's worldly ways, and when I was too
enthusiastic and too much carried away by the splendour and beauty
of the spiritual ideal to realise the inevitable derision and scorn
which are bound to fall upon untried explorers into the mysteries of
the unseen; yet it was solely on account of a strange psychical
experience which chanced to myself when I stood upon the threshold
of what is called 'life' that I found myself producing my first
book, "A Romance of Two Worlds." It was a rash experiment, but it
was the direct result of an initiation into some few of the truths
behind the veil of the Seeming Real. I did not then know why I was
selected for such an 'initiation'--and I do not know even now. It
arose quite naturally out of a series of ordinary events which might
happen to anyone. I was not compelled or persuaded into it, for,
being alone in the world and more or less friendless, I had no
opportunity to seek advice or assistance from any person as to the
course of life or learning I should pursue. And I learned what I did
learn because of my own unwavering intention and WILL to be
instructed.

I should here perhaps explain the tenor of the instruction which was
gradually imparted to me in just such measures of proportion as I
was found to be receptive. The first thing I was taught was how to
bring every feeling and sense into close union with the spirit of
Nature. Nature, I was told, is the reflection of the working-mind of
the Creator--and any opposition to that working-mind on the part of
any living organism It has created cannot but result in disaster.
Pursuing this line of study, a wonderful vista of perpetual
revealment was opened to me. I saw how humanity, moved by gross
egoism, has in every age of the world ordained laws and morals for
itself which are the very reverse of Nature's teaching--I saw how,
instead of helping the wheel of progress and wisdom onward, man
reverses it by his obstinacy and turns it backward even on the very
point of great attainment--and I was able to perceive how the
sorrows and despairs of the world are caused by this one simple
fact--Man working AGAINST Nature--while Nature, ever divine and
invincible, pursues her God-appointed course, sweeping her puny
opponents aside and inflexibly carrying out her will to the end. And
I learned how true it is that if Man went WITH her instead of
AGAINST her, there would be no more misunderstanding of the laws of
the Universe, and that where there is now nothing but discord, all
would be divinest harmony.

My first book, "A Romance of Two Worlds," was an eager, though
crude, attempt to explain and express something of what I myself had
studied on some of these subjects, though, as I have already said,
my mind was unformed and immature, and, therefore, I was not
permitted to disclose more than a glimmering of the light I was
beginning to perceive. My own probation--destined to be a severe
one--had only just been entered upon; and hard and fast limits were
imposed on me for a certain time. I was forbidden, for example, to
write of radium, that wonderful 'discovery' of the immediate hour,
though it was then, and had been for a long period, perfectly well
known to my instructors, who possessed all the means of extracting
it from substances as yet undreamed of by latter-day scientists. I
was only permitted to hint at it under the guise of the word
'Electricity'--which, after all, was not so much of a misnomer,
seeing that electric force displays itself in countless millions of
forms. My "Electric Theory of the Universe" in the "Romance of Two
Worlds" foreran the utterance of the scientist who in the "Hibbert
Journal" for January, 1905, wrote as follows:--"The last years have
seen the dawn of a revolution in science as great as that which in
the sphere of religion overthrew the many gods and crowned the One.
Matter, as we have understood it, there is none, nor probably
anywhere the individual atom. The so-called atoms are systems of
ELECTRONIC corpuscles, bound together by their mutual forces too
firmly for any human contrivance completely to sunder them,--alike
in their electric composition, differing only in the rhythms of
their motion. ELECTRICITY is all things, and all things are
ELECTRIC."

THIS WAS PRECISELY MY TEACHING IN THE FIRST BOOK I EVER WROTE. I was
ridiculed for it, of course,--and I was told that there was no
'spiritual' force in electricity. I differ from this view; but
'radio-activity' is perhaps the better, because the truer term to
employ in seeking to describe the Germ or Embryo of the Soul, for--
as scientists have proved--"Radium is capable of absorbing from
surrounding bodies SOME UNKNOWN FORM OF ENERGY which it can render
evident as heat and light." This is precisely what the radio-
activity in each individual soul of each individual human being is
ordained to do,--to absorb an 'unknown form of energy which it can
render evident as heat and light.' Heat and Light are the
composition of Life;--and the Life which this radio-activity of Soul
generates IN itself and OF itself, can never die. Or, as I wrote in
"A Romance of Two Worlds "--"Like all flames, this electric (or
radiant) spark can either be fanned into a fire, or allowed to
escape in air,--IT CAN NEVER BE DESTROYED." And again, from the same
book: "All the wonders of Nature are the result of LIGHT AND HEAT
ALONE." Paracelsus, as early as about 1526, made guarded mention of
the same substance or quality, describing it thus:--"The more of the
humour of life it has, the more of the spirit of life abounds in
that life." Though truly this vital radio-active force lacks all
fitting name. To material science radium, or radium chloride, is a
minute salt crystal, so rare and costly to obtain that it may be
counted as about three thousand times the price of gold in the
market. But of the action of PURE radium, the knowledge of ordinary
scientific students is nil. They know that an infinitely small spark
of radium salt will emit heat and light continuously without any
combustion or change in its own structure. And I would here quote a
passage from a lecture delivered by one of our prominent scientists
in 1904. "Details concerning the behaviour of several radio-active
bodies were detected, as, for example, their activity was not
constant; it gradually grew in strength, BUT THE GROWN PORTION OF
THE ACTIVITY COULD BE BLOWN AWAY, AND THE BLOWN AWAY PART RETAINED
ITS ACTIVITY ONLY FOR A TIME. It decayed in a few days or weeks,--
WHEREAS THE RADIUM ROSE IN STRENGTH AGAIN AT THE SAME RATE THAT THE
OTHER DECAYED. And so on constantly. It was as if a NEW FORM of
matter was constantly being produced, and AS IF THE RADIO-ACTIVITY
WAS A CONCOMITANT OF THE CHANGE OF FORM. It was also found that
radium kept on producing heat de novo so as to keep itself always a
fraction of a degree ABOVE THE SURROUNDING TEMPERATURE; also that it
spontaneously PRODUCED ELECTRICITY."

Does this teach no lesson on the resurrection of the dead? Of the
'blown away part' which decays in a few days or weeks?--of the
'Radia' or 'Radiance' of the Soul, rising in strength again AT THE
SAME RATE that the other, the Body, or 'grown portion of the
activity,' decays? Of the 'new form of matter' and the 'radio-
activity as a concomitant of the CHANGE OF FORM'? Does not Science
here almost unwittingly verify the words of St. Paul:--"It is sown a
natural body; it is raised a spiritual body. There is a natural
body, and there is a spiritual body"? There is nothing impossible or
'miraculous' in such a consummation, even according to modern
material science,--it is merely the natural action of PURE radio-
activity or that etherical composition for which we have no name,
but which we have vaguely called the SOUL for countless ages.

To multitudes of people this expression 'the Soul' has become
overfamiliar by constant repetition, and conveys little more than
the suggestion of a myth, or the hint of an Imaginary Existence. Now
there is nothing in the whole Universe so REAL as the Vital Germ of
the actual Form and Being of the living, radiant, active Creature
within each one of us,--the creature who, impressed and guided by
our Free Will, works out its own delight or doom. The WILL of each
man or woman is like the compass of a ship,--where it points, the
ship goes. If the needle directs it to the rocks, there is wreck and
disaster,--if to the open sea, there is clear sailing. God leaves
the WILL of man at perfect liberty. His Divine Love neither
constrains nor compels. We must Ourselves learn the ways of Right
and Wrong, and having learned, we must choose. We must injure
Ourselves. God will not injure us. We invite our own miseries. God
does not send them. The evils and sorrows that afflict mankind are
of mankind's own making. Even in natural catastrophes, which ruin
cities and devastate countries, it is well to remember that Nature,
which is the MATERIAL EXPRESSION of the mind of God, will not
tolerate too long a burden of human iniquity. Nature destroys what
is putrescent; she covers it up with fresh earth on which healthier
things may find place to grow.

I tried to convey some hint of these truths in my "Romance of Two
Worlds." Some few gave heed,--others wrote to me from all parts of
the world concerning what they called my 'views' on the subjects
treated of,--some asked to be 'initiated' into my 'experience' of
the Unseen,--but many of my correspondents (I say it with regret)
were moved by purely selfish considerations for their own private
and particular advancement, and showed, by the very tone of their
letters, not only an astounding hypocrisy, but also the good opinion
they entertained of their own worthiness, their own capabilities,
and their own great intellectuality, forgetful of the words:--
"Except ye become as little children, ye shall not enter into the
Kingdom of Heaven."

Now the spirit of a little child is receptive and trustful. It has
no desire for argument, and it is instinctively confident that it
will not be led into unnecessary difficulty or danger by its
responsible guardians. This is the spirit in which, if we are
sincere in our seeking for knowledge, we should and must approach
the deeper psychological mysteries of Nature. But as long as we
interpose the darkness of personal doubt and prejudice between
ourselves and the Light Eternal no progress can be made,--and every
attempt to penetrate into the Holy of Holies will be met and thrust
back by that 'flaming Sword' which from the beginning, as now, turns
every way to guard the Tree of Life.

Knowing this, and seeing that Self was the stumbling-block with most
of my correspondents, I was anxious to write another book at once,
also in the guise of a romance, to serve as a little lamp of love
whereby my readers might haply discover the real character of the
obstacle which blocked their way to an intelligent Soul-advancement.
But the publisher I had at the time (the late Mr. George Bentley)
assured me that if I wrote another 'spiritualistic' book, I should
lose the public hearing I had just gained. I do not know why he had
formed this opinion, but as he was a kindly personal friend, and
took a keen interest in my career, never handing any manuscript of
mine over to his 'reader,' but always reading it himself, I felt it
incumbent upon me, as a young beginner, to accept the advice which I
knew could only be given with the very best intentions towards me.
To please him, therefore, and to please the particular public to
which he had introduced me, I wrote something entirely different,--a
melodramatic tale entitled: "Vendetta: The Story of One Forgotten."
The book made a certain stir, and Mr. Bentley next begged me to try
'a love-story, pur et simple' (I quote from his own letter). The
result was my novel of "Thelma," which achieved a great popular
success and still remains a favourite work with a large majority of
readers. I then considered myself free to move once more upon the
lines which my study of psychic forces had convinced me were of pre-
eminent importance. And moved by a strong conviction that men and
women are hindered from attaining their full heritage of life by the
obstinate interposition of their merely material Selves, I wrote
"Ardath: The Story of a Dead Self." The plan of this book was
partially suggested by the following passages from the Second
Apocryphal Book of Esdras:--

"Go into a field of flowers where no house is builded. And pray unto
the Highest continually, then will I come and talk with thee. So I
went my way into the field which is called Ardath, like as he
commanded me, and there I sat among the flowers."

In this field the Prophet sees the vision of a woman.

"And it came to pass while I was talking with her, behold her face
upon a sudden shined exceedingly and her countenance glistened, so
that I was afraid of her and mused what it might be. And I looked,
and behold the woman appeared unto me no more, but there was a city
builded, and a large place showed itself from the foundations."

On this I raised the fabric of my own "Dream City," and sought to
elucidate some of the meaning of that great text in Ecclesiastes
which contains in itself all the philosophy of the ages: "That which
Hath Been is Now; and that which is To Be hath already Been; and God
requireth that which is Past."

The book, however, so my publisher Mr. Bentley told me in a series
of letters which I still possess, and which show how keen was his
own interest in my work, was 'entirely over the heads of the general
public.' His opinion was, no doubt, correct, as "Ardath" still
remains the least 'popular' of any book I have ever written.
Nevertheless it brought me the unsought and very generous praise of
the late Poet Laureate, Alfred Lord Tennyson, as well as the equally
unsought good opinion and personal friendship of the famous
statesman, William Ewart Gladstone, while many of the better-class
literary journals vied with one another in according me an almost
enthusiastic eulogy. Such authorities as the "Athenaeum" and
"Spectator" praised the whole conception and style of the work, the
latter journal going as far as to say that I had beaten Beckford's
famous "Vathek" on its own ground.

Whatever may now be the consensus of opinion on its merits or
demerits, I know and feel it to be one of my most worthy attempts,
even though it is not favoured by the million. It does not appeal to
anything 'of the moment' merely, because there are very few people
who can or will understand that if the Soul or 'Radia' of a human
being is so forgetful of its highest origin as to cling to its human
Self only (events the hero of "Ardath" clung to the Shadow of his
Former Self and to the illusory pictures of that Former Self's
pleasures and vices and vanities) then the way to the eternal
Happier Progress is barred. There is yet another intention in this
book which seems to be missed by the casual reader, namely,--That
each human soul is a germ of SEPARATE and INDIVIDUAL spiritual
existence. Even as no two leaves are exactly alike on any tree, and
no two blades of grass are precisely similar, so no two souls
resemble each other, but are wholly different, endowed with
different gifts and different capacities. Individuality is strongly
insisted upon in material Nature. And why? Because material Nature
is merely the reflex or mirror of the more strongly insistent
individuality of psychic form. Again, psychic form is generated from
a divinely eternal psychic substance,--a 'radia' or emanation of
God's own Being which, as it progresses onward through endless aeons
of constantly renewed vitality, grows more and more powerful,
changing its shape often, but never its everlasting composition and
quality. Therefore, all the experiences of the 'Soul' or psychic
form, from its first entrance into active consciousness, whether in
this world or in other worlds, are attracted to itself by its own
inherent volition, and work together to make it what it is now and
what it will be hereafter.

That is what "Ardath: The Story of a Dead Self" seeks to explain,
and I have nothing to take back from what I have written in its
pages. In its experimental teaching it is the natural and intended
sequence of "A Romance of Two Worlds," and was meant to assist the
studies of the many who had written to me asking for help. And
despite the fact that some of these persons, owing to an inherent
incapacity for concentrated thought upon any subject, found it too
'difficult' as they said, for casual reading, its reception was
sufficiently encouraging to decide me on continuing to press upon
public attention the theories therein set forth. "The Soul of
Lilith" was, therefore, my next venture,--a third link in the chain
I sought to weave between the perishable materialism of our ordinary
conceptions of life, and the undying spiritual quality of life as it
truly is. In this I portrayed the complete failure that must
inevitably result from man's prejudice and intellectual pride when
studying the marvellous mysteries of what I would call the Further
World,--that is to say, the 'Soul' of the world which is hidden
deeply behind its external Appearance,--and how impossible it is and
ever must be that any 'Soul' should visibly manifest itself where
there is undue attachment to the body. The publication of the book
was a very interesting experience. It was and is still less
'popular' than "Ardath"--but it has been gladly welcomed by a
distinctly cultured minority of persons famous in art, science and
literature, whose good opinion is well worth having. With this
reward I was perfectly content, but my publisher was not so easily
pleased. He wanted something that would 'sell' better. To relieve
his impatience, therefore, I wrote a more or less 'sensational'
novel dealing with the absinthe drinkers of Paris, entitled
"Wormwood," which did a certain amount of good in its way, by
helping to call public attention to the devastation wrought by the
use of the pernicious drug among the French and other Continental
peoples--and after this, receiving a strong and almost imperative
impetus towards that particular goal whither my mind was set, I went
to work again with renewed vigour on my own favourite and long
studied line of argument, indifferent alike to publisher or public.
Filled with the fervour of a passionate and proved faith, I wrote
"Barabbas: A Dream of the World's Tragedy,"--and this was the signal
of separation from my excellent old friend, George Bentley, who had
not the courage to publish a poetic romance which introduced, albeit
with a tenderness and reverence unspeakable, so far as my own
intention was concerned, the Crucifixion and Resurrection of Christ.
He wrote to me expressing his opinion in these terms:--"I can
conscientiously praise the power and feeling you exhibit for your
vast subject, and the rush and beauty of the language, and above all
I feel that the book is the genuine outcome of a fervent faith all
too rare in these days, but--I fear its effect on the public mind."
Yet, when urged to a given point in the discussion, he could not
deny that 'the effect on the public mind' of the Passion Play at
Ober-Ammergau is generally impressive and helpful, while he was
bound to admit that there was something to be said for the
introduction of Divine personages in the epic romances of Milton and
Dante. What could be written in poetic verse did not, however, seem
to him suitable for poetic prose, and I did not waste words in
argument, as I knew the time had come for the parting of the ways. I
sought my present publisher, Mr. Methuen, who, being aware, from a
business point of view, that I had now won a certain reputation,
took "Barabbas" without parley. It met with an almost unprecedented
success, not only in this country but all over the world. Within a
few months it was translated into every known European language,
inclusive even of modern Greek, and nowhere perhaps has it awakened
a wider interest than in India, where it is published in Hindustani,
Gujarati, and various other Eastern dialects. Its notable triumph
was achieved despite a hailstorm of abuse rattled down upon me by
the press,--a hailstorm which I, personally, found welcome and
refreshing, inasmuch as it cleared the air and cleaned the road for
my better wayfaring. It released me once and for all from the
trammels of such obligation as is incurred by praise, and set me
firmly on my feet in that complete independence which to me (and to
all who seek what I have found) is a paramount necessity. For, as
Thomas a Kempis writes: "Whosoever neither desires to please men nor
fears to displease them shall enjoy much peace." I took my freedom
gratefully, and ever since that time of unjust and ill-considered
attack from persons who were too malignantly minded to even read the
work they vainly endeavoured to destroy, have been happily
indifferent to all so-called 'criticism' and immune from all
attempts to interrupt my progress or turn me back upon my chosen
way. From henceforth I recognised that no one could hinder or oppose
me but myself--and that I had the making, tinder God, of my own
destiny. I followed up "Barabbas" as quickly as possible by "The
Sorrows of Satan," thus carrying out the preconceived intention I
had always had of depicting, first, the martyrdom which is always
the world's guerdon to Absolute Good,--and secondly, the awful,
unimaginable torture which must, by Divine Law, for ever be the lot
of Absolute Evil.

The two books carried their message far and wide with astonishing
success and swiftness, and I then drew some of my threads of former
argument together in "The Master Christian," wherein I depicted
Christ as a Child, visiting our world again as it is to-day and
sorrowfully observing the wickedness which men practise in His Name.
This book was seized upon by thousands of readers in all countries
of the world with an amazing avidity which proved how deep was the
longing for some clear exposition of faith that might console as
well as command,--and after its publication I decided to let it take
its own uninterrupted course for a time and to change my own line of
work to lighter themes, lest I should be set down as 'spiritualist'
or 'theosophist,' both of which terms have been brought into
contempt by tricksters. So I played with my pen, and did my best to
entertain the public with stories of everyday life and love, such as
the least instructed could understand, and that I now allude to the
psychological side of my work is merely to explain that these six
books, namely: "A Romance of Two Worlds," "Ardath: The Story of a
Dead Self," "The Soul of Lilith," "Barabbas," "The Sorrows of Satan"
and "The Master Christian" ARE THE RESULT OF A DELIBERATELY
CONCEIVED PLAN AND INTENTION, and are all linked together by the ONE
THEORY. They have not been written solely as pieces of fiction for
which I, the author, am paid by the publisher, or you, the reader,
are content to be temporarily entertained,--they are the outcome of
what I myself have learned, practised and proved in the daily
experiences, both small and great, of daily life.

You may probably say and you probably WILL say--"What does that
matter to us? We do not care a jot for your 'experiences'--they are
transcendental and absurd--they bore us to extinction."
Nevertheless, quite callous as you are or may be, there must come a
time when pain and sorrow have you in their grip--when what you call
'death' stands face to face with you, and when you will find that
all you have thought, desired or planned for your own pleasure, and
all that you possess of material good or advantage, vanishes like
smoke, leaving nothing behind,--when the world will seem no more
than a small receding point from which you must fall into the
Unknown--and when that "dread of something after death, The
undiscovered country from whose bourn No traveller returns, PUZZLES
THE WILL." You have at present living among you a great professing
scientist, Dr. Oliver Lodge, who, wandering among mazy infinities,
conceives it even possible to communicate with departed spirits,--
while I, who have no such weight of worldly authority and learning
behind me, tell you that such a thing is out of all natural law and
therefore CAN NEVER BE. Nature can and will unveil to us many
mysteries that seem SUPER-natural, when they are only manifestations
of the deepest centre of the purest natural--but nothing can alter
Divine Law, or change the system which has governed the Universe
from the beginning. And by this Divine Law and system we have to
learn that the so-called 'dead' are NOT dead--they have merely been
removed to fresh life and new spheres of action, under which
circumstances they cannot possibly hold communication with us in any
way unless they again assume the human form and human existence. In
this case (which very frequently happens) it takes not only time for
us to know them, but it also demands a certain instinctive
receptiveness on our parts, or willingness to recognise them. Even
the risen Saviour was not at first recognised by His own disciples.
It is because I have been practically convinced of this truth, and
because I have learned that life is not and never can be death, but
only constant change and reinvestment of Spirit into Form, that I
have presumed so far as to allude to my own faith and experience,--a
'personal' touch for which I readily apologise, knowing that it
cannot be interesting to the majority who would never take the
trouble to shape their lives as I seek to shape mine. Still, if
there are one or two out of a million who feel as I do, that life
and love are of little worth if they must end in dark nothingness,
these may perhaps have the patience to come with me through the
pages of a narrative which is neither 'incidental' nor 'sensational'
nor anything which should pertain to the modern 'romance' or
'novel,' and which has been written because the writing of it
enforced itself upon me with an insistence that would take no
denial.

Perhaps there will be at least one among those who turn over this
book, who will be sufficiently interested in the psychic--that is to
say the immortal and, therefore, the only REAL side of life--to give
a little undivided attention to the subject. To that one I address
myself and say: Will you, to begin with, drop your burden of
preconceived opinions and prejudices, whatever they are? Will you
set aside the small cares and trifles that affect your own material
personality? Will you detach yourself from your own private and
particular surroundings for a space and agree to THINK with me?
Thinking is, I know, the hardest of all hard tasks to the modern
mind. But if you would learn, you must undertake this trouble. If
you would find the path which is made fair and brilliant by the
radiance of the soul's imperishable summer, you must not grudge
time. If I try, no matter how inadequately, to show you something of
the mystic power that makes for happiness, do not shut your eyes in
scorn or languor to the smallest flash of light through your
darkness which may help you to a mastery of the secret.

I say again--Will you THINK with me? Will you, for instance, think
of Life? What is it? Of Death? What is it? What is the primary
object of Living? What is the problem solved by Dying? All these
questions should have answer,--for nothing is without a meaning,--
and nothing ever HAS BEEN, or ever WILL BE, without a purpose?

In this world, apparently, and according to our surface knowledge of
all physical and mental phenomena, it would seem that the chief
business of humanity is to continually re-create itself. Man exists-
-in his own opinion--merely to perpetuate Man. All the wonders of
the earth, air, fire and water,--all the sustenance drawn from the
teeming bosom of Nature,--all the progress of countless
civilisations in ever recurring and repeated processional order,--
all the sciences old and new,--are solely to nourish, support,
instruct, entertain and furnish food and employment for the tiny
two-legged imp of Chance, spawned (as he himself asserts) out of gas
and atoms.

Yet,--as he personally declares, through the mouth of his modern
science,--he is not of real importance withal. The little planet on
which he dwells would, to all seeming, move on in its orbit in the
same way as it does now, without him. In itself it is a pigmy world
compared with the rest of the solar system of which it is a part.
Nevertheless, the fact cannot be denied that his material
surroundings are of a quality tending to either impress or to
deceive Man with a sense of his own value. The world is his oyster
which he, with the sword of enterprise, will open,--and all his
natural instincts urge him to perpetuate himself in some form or
other incessantly and without stint. Why? Why is his existence
judged to be necessary? Why should he not cease to be? Trees would
grow, flowers would bloom, birds would sing, fish would glide
through the rivers and the seas,--the insect and animal tribes of
field and forest would enjoy their existence unmolested, and the
great sun would shine on ever the same, rising at dawn, sinking at
even, with unbroken exactitude and regularity if Man no longer
lived. Why have the monstrous forces of Evolution thundered their
way through cycles of creation to produce so infinitesimal a
prodigy?

Till this question is answered, so long must life seem at its best
but vague and unsatisfactory. So long over all things must brood the
shadow of death made more gloomy by hopeless contemplation. So long
must Creation appear something of a cruel farce, for which peoples
and civilisations come into being merely to be destroyed and leave
no trace. All the work futile,--all the education useless,--all the
hope vain. Only when men and women learn that their lives are not
infinitesimal but infinite--that each of them possesses within
himself or herself an eternal, active, conscious individual Force,--
a Being--a Form--which in its radio-active energy draws to itself
and accommodates to its use, everything that is necessary for the
accomplishment of its endeavours, whether such endeavours be to
continue its life on this planet or to remove to other spheres; only
then will it be clearly understood that all Nature is the subject
and servant of this Radiant Energy--that Itself is the god-like
'image' or emanation of God, and that as such it has its eternal
part to perform in the eternal movement towards the Eternal Highest.

I now leave the following pages to the reader's attentive or
indifferent consideration. To me, as I have already stated, outside
opinion is of no moment. Personally speaking, I should perhaps have
preferred, had it been possible, to set forth the incidents narrated
in the ensuing 'romance' in the form of separate essays on the
nature of the mystic tuition and experience through which some of us
in this workaday world have the courage to pass successfully, but I
know that the masses of the people who drift restlessly to and fro
upon the surface of this planet, ever seeking for comfort in various
forms of religion and too often finding none, will not listen to any
spiritual truth unless it is conveyed to them, as though they were
children, in the form of a 'story.' I am not the heroine of the
tale--though I have narrated it (more or less as told to me) in the
first person singular, because it seemed to me simpler and more
direct. She to whom the perfect comprehension of happiness has come
with an equally perfect possession of love, is one out of a few who
are seeking what she has found. Many among the world's greatest
mystics and philosophers have tried for the prizes she has won,--for
the world possesses Plato, the Bible and Christ, but in its apparent
present ways of living has learned little or nothing from the three,
so that other would-be teachers may well despair of carrying
persuasion where such mighty predecessors have seemingly failed. The
serious and REAL things of life are nowadays made subjects for
derision rather than reverence;--then, again, there is unhappily an
alarmingly increasing majority of weak-minded and degenerate
persons, born of drunken, diseased or vicious parents, who are
mentally unfit for the loftier forms of study, and in whom the mere
act of thought-concentration would be dangerous and likely to upset
their mental balance altogether; while by far the larger half of the
social community seek to avoid the consideration of anything that is
not exactly suited to their tastes. Some of our most respected
social institutions are nothing but so many self-opinionated and
unconscious oppositions to the Law of Nature which is the Law of
God,--and thus it often happens that when obstinate humanity
persists in considering its own ideas of Right and Wrong superior to
the Eternal Decrees which have been visibly presented through Nature
since the earliest dawn of creation, a faulty civilisation sets in
and is presently swept back upon its advancing wheels, and forced to
begin again with primal letters of learning. In the same way a
faulty Soul, an imperfect individual Spirit, is likewise compelled
to return to school and resume the study of the lessons it has
failed to put into practice. Nevertheless, people cannot bear to
have it plainly said or written down, as it has been said and
written down over and over again any time since the world began,
that all the corrupt government, wars, slaveries, plagues, diseases
and despairs that afflict humanity are humanity's own sins taking
vengeance upon the sinners, 'even unto the third and fourth
generation.' And this not out of Divine cruelty, but because of
Divine Law which from the first ordained that Evil shall slay
Itself, leaving room only for Good. Men and women alike will scarce
endure to read any book which urges this unalterable fact upon their
attention. They pronounce the author 'arrogant' or 'presuming to lay
down the law';--and they profess to be scandalised by an encounter
with honesty. Nevertheless, the faithful writer of things as they
Are will not be disturbed by the aspect of things as they Seem.

Spirit,--the creative Essence of all that is,--works in various
forms, but always on an ascending plane, and it invariably rejects
and destroys whatever interrupts that onward and upward progress.
Being in Itself the Radiant outflow of the Mind of God, it is the
LIFE of the Universe. And it is very needful to understand and to
remember that there is nothing which can properly be called SUPER-
natural, or above Nature, inasmuch as this Eternal Spirit of Energy
is in and throughout all Nature. Therefore, what to the common mind
appears miraculous or impossible, is nevertheless actually ordinary,
and only seems EXTRA-ordinary to the common mind's lack of knowledge
and experience. The Fountain of Youth and the Elixir of Life were
dreams of the ancient mystics and scientists, but they are not
dreams to-day. To the Soul that has found them they are Divine
Realities.

MARIE CORELLI






        "There is no Death,
   What seems so is transition."




I

THE HEROINE BEGINS HER STORY


It is difficult at all times to write or speak of circumstances
which though perfectly at one with Nature appear to be removed from
natural occurrences. Apart from the incredulity with which the
narration of such incidents is received, the mere idea that any one
human creature should be fortunate enough to secure some particular
advantage which others, through their own indolence or indifference,
have missed, is sufficient to excite the envy of the weak or the
anger of the ignorant. In all criticism it is an understood thing
that the subject to be criticised must be UNDER the critic, never
above,--that is to say, never above the critic's ability to
comprehend; therefore, as it is impossible that an outsider should
enter at once into a clear understanding of the mystic Spiritual-
Nature world around him, it follows that the teachings and tenets of
that Spiritual-Nature world must be more or less a closed book to
such an one,--a book, moreover, which he seldom cares or dares to
try and open.

In this way and for this reason the Eastern philosophers and sages
concealed much of their most profound knowledge from the multitude,
because they rightly recognised the limitations of narrow minds and
prejudiced opinions. What the fool cannot learn he laughs at,
thinking that by his laughter he shows superiority instead of latent
idiocy. And so it has happened that many of the greatest discoveries
of science, though fully known and realised in the past by the
initiated few, were never disclosed to the many until recent years,
when 'wireless telegraphy' and 'light-rays' are accepted facts,
though these very things were familiar to the Egyptian priests and
to that particular sect known as the 'Hermetic Brethren,' many of
whom used the 'violet ray' for chemical and other purposes ages
before the coming of Christ. Wireless telegraphy was also an
ordinary method of communication between them, and they had their
'stations' for it in high towers on certain points of land as we
have now. But if they had made their scientific attainments known to
the multitude of their day they would have been judged as impostors
or madmen. In the time of Galileo men would not believe that the
earth moved round the sun,--and if anyone had then declared that
messages could be sent from one ship to another in mid-ocean without
any visible means of communication, he would probably have been put
to torture and death as a sorcerer and deliberate misleader of the
public. In the same way those who write of spiritual truths and the
psychic control of our life-forces are as foolishly criticised as
Galileo, and as wrongfully condemned.

For hundreds of years man's vain presumption and belief in his own
infallibility caused him to remain in error concerning the simplest
elements of astronomy, which would have taught him the true position
of the sphere upon which he dwells. With precisely equal obstinacy
man lives to-day in ignorance of his own highest powers because he
will not take the trouble to study the elements of that supreme and
all-commanding mental science which would enable him to understand
his own essential life and being, and the intention of his Creator
with regard to his progress and betterment. Therefore, in the face
of his persistent egotism and effrontery, and his continuous denial
of the 'superhuman' (which denial is absurdly incongruous seeing
that all his religions are built up on a 'superhuman' basis), it is
generally necessary for students of psychic mysteries to guard the
treasures of their wisdom from profane and vulgar scorn,--a scorn
which amounts in their eyes to blasphemy. For centuries it has been
their custom to conceal the tenets of their creed from the common
knowledge for the sake of conventions; because they would, or might,
be shut out from such consolations as human social intercourse can
give if their spiritual attainments were found to be, as they often
are, beyond the ordinary. Thus they move through the world with the
utmost caution, and instead of making a display of their powers
they, if they are true to their faith, studiously deny the idea that
they have any extraordinary or separate knowledge. They live as
spectators of the progress or decay of nations, and they have no
desire to make disciples, converts or confidants. They submit to the
obligations of life, obey all civil codes, and are blameless and
generous citizens, only preserving silence in regard to their own
private beliefs, and giving the public the benefit of their
acquirements up to a certain point, but shutting out curiosity where
they do not wish its impertinent eyes.

To this, the creed just spoken of, I, the writer of this present
narrative, belong. It has nothing whatever to do with merely human
dogma,--and yet I would have it distinctly understood that I am not
opposed to 'forms' of religion save where they overwhelm religion
itself and allow the Spirit to be utterly lost in the Letter. For
'the letter killeth,--the spirit giveth life.' So far as a 'form'
may make a way for truth to become manifest, I am with it,--but when
it is a mere Sham or Show, and when human souls are lost rather than
saved by it, I am opposed to it. And with all my deficiencies I am
conscious that I may risk the chance of a lower world's disdain,
seeing that the 'higher world without end' is open to me in its
imperishable brightness and beauty, to live in both NOW, and for
ever. No one can cast me out of that glorious and indestructible
Universe, for 'whithersoever I go there will be the sun and the
moon, and the stars and visions and communion with the gods.'

And so I will fulfil the task allotted to me, and will enter at once
upon my 'story'--in which form I shall endeavour to convey to my
readers certain facts which are as far from fiction as the sayings
of the prophets of old,--sayings that we know have been realised by
the science of to-day. Every great truth has at first been no more
than a dream,--that is to say, a thought, or an instinctive
perception of the Soul reaching after its own immortal heritage. And
what the Soul demands it receives.


                         *     *     *
                            *     *
                               *

At a time of year when the indolent languors of an exceptionally
warm summer disinclined most people for continuous hard work, and
when those who could afford it had left their ordinary avocations
for the joys of a long holiday, I received a pressing invitation
from certain persons whom I had met by chance during one London
season, to join them in a yachting cruise. My intending host was an
exceedingly rich man, a widower with one daughter, a delicate and
ailing creature who, had she been poor, would have been irreverently
styled 'a tiresome old maid,' but who by reason of being a
millionaire's sole heiress was alluded to with sycophantic
tenderness by all and sundry as 'Poor Miss Catherine.' Morton
Harland, her father, was in a certain sense notorious for having
written and published a bitter, cold and pitiless attack on
religion, which was the favourite reading of many scholars and
literary men, and this notable performance, together with the well
accredited reports of his almost fabulous wealth, secured for him
two social sets,--the one composed of such human sharks as are
accustomed to swim round the plutocrat,--the other of the cynical,
listless, semi-bored portion of a so-called cultured class who,
having grown utterly tired of themselves, presumed that it was
clever to be equally tired of God. I was surprised that such a man
as he was should think of including me among his guests, for I had
scarcely exchanged a dozen words with him, and my acquaintance with
Miss Harland was restricted to a few casual condolences with her
respecting the state of her health. Yet it so chanced that one of
those vague impulses to which we can give no name, but which often
play an important part in the building up of our life-dramas, moved
both father and daughter to a wish for my company. Moreover, the
wish was so strong that though on first receiving their invitation I
had refused it, they repeated it urgently, Morton Harland himself
pressing it upon me with an almost imperative insistence.

"You want rest,"--he said, peering at me narrowly with his small
hard brown eyes--"You work all the time. And to what purpose?"

I smiled.

"To as much purpose as anyone else, I suppose,"--I answered--"But to
put it plainly, I work because I love work."

The lines of his mouth grew harder.

"So did I love work when I was your age,"--he said--"I thought I
could carve out a destiny. So I could. I have done it. But now it's
done I'm tired! I'm sick of my destiny,--the thing I carved out so
cleverly,--it has the stone face of a Sphinx and its eyes are blank
and without meaning."

I was silent. My silence seemed to irritate him, and he gave me a
sharp, enquiring glance.

"Do you hear me?" he demanded--"If you do, I don't believe you
understand!"

"I hear--and I quite understand,"--I replied, quietly, "Your
destiny, as you have made it, is that of a rich man. And you do not
care about it. I think that's quite natural."

He laughed harshly.

"There you are again!" he exclaimed--"Up in the air and riding a
theory like a witch on a broomstick! It's NOT natural. That's just
where you're wrong! It's quite UN-natural. If a man has plenty of
money he ought to be perfectly happy and satisfied,--he can get
everything he wants,--he can move the whole world of commerce and
speculation, and can shake the tree of Fortune so that the apples
shall always fall at his own feet. But if the apples are tasteless
there's something wrong."

"Not with the apples," I said.

"Oh, I know what you mean! You would say the fault is with me, not
with Fortune's fruit. You may be right. Catherine says you are. Poor
mopish Catherine!--always ailing, always querulous! Come and cheer
her!"

"But"--I ventured to say--"I hardly know her."

"That's true. But she has taken a curious fancy to you. She has very
few fancies nowadays,--none that wealth can gratify. Her life has
been a complete disillusion. If you would do her and me a kindness,
come!"

I was a little troubled by his pertinacity. I had never liked Morton
Harland. His reputation, both as a man of wealth and a man of
letters, was to me unenviable. He did no particular good with his
money,--and such literary talent as he possessed he squandered in
attacking nobler ideals than he had ever been able to attain. He was
not agreeable to look at either; his pale, close-shaven face was
deeply marked by lines of avarice and cunning,--his tall, lean
figure had an aggressive air in its very attitude, and his unkind
mouth never failed, whether in speaking or smiling, to express a
sneer. Apparently he guessed the vague tenor of my thoughts, for he
went on:--

"Don't be afraid of me! I'm not an ogre, and I shan't eat you! You
think me a disagreeable man--well, so I am. I've had enough in my
life to make me disagreeable. And"--here he paused, passing his hand
across his eyes with a worried and impatient gesture--"I've had an
unexpected blow just lately. The doctors tell me that I have a
mortal disease for which there is no remedy. I may live on for
several years, or I may die suddenly; it's all a matter of care--or
chance. I want to forget the sad news for a while if I can. I've
told Catherine, and I suppose I've added to her usual burden of
vapours and melancholy--so we're a couple of miserable wretches.
It's not very unselfish of us to ask you to come and join us under
such circumstances--"

As he spoke my mind suddenly made itself up. I would go. Why not? A
cruise on a magnificent steam yacht, replete with every comfort and
luxury, was surely a fairly pleasant way of taking a holiday, even
with two invalids for company.

"I'm sorry," I said, as gently as I could--"very sorry that you are
ill. Perhaps the doctors may be mistaken. They are not always
infallible. Many of their doomed patients have recovered in spite of
their verdict. And--as you and Miss Harland wish it so much--I will
certainly come."

His frowning face lightened, and for a moment looked almost kind.

"That's right!" he said--"The fresh air and the sea will do you
good. As for ourselves, sickly people though we are, we shall not
obtrude our ailments upon your attention. At least _I_ shall not.
Catherine may--she has got into an unfortunate habit of talking
about her aches and pains, and if her acquaintances have no aches
and pains to discuss with her she is at a loss for conversation.
However, we shall do our best to make the time go easily with you.
There will be no other company on board--except my private secretary
and my attendant physician,--both decent fellows who know their
place and keep it."

The hard look settled again in his eyes, and his ugly mouth closed
firmly in its usual cruel line. My subconscious dislike of him gave
me a sharp thrust of regret that, after all, I had accepted his
invitation.

"I was going to Scotland for a change,"--I murmured, hesitatingly.

"Were you? Then our plans coincide. We join the yacht at Rothesay--
you can meet us there. I propose a cruise among the Western isles--
the Hebrides--and possibly on to Norway and its fjords. What do you
say?"

My heart thrilled with a sudden sense of expectant joy. In my fancy
I already saw the heather-crowned summits of the Highland hills,
bathed in soft climbing mists of amethyst and rose,--the lovely
purple light that dances on the mountain lochs at the sinking of the
sun,--the exquisite beauty of wild moor and rocky foreland,--and
almost I was disposed to think this antipathetic millionaire an
angel of blessing in disguise.

"It will be delightful!" I said, with real fervour--"I shall love
it! I'm glad you are going to keep to northern seas."

"Northern seas are the only seas possible for summer," he replied--
"With the winter one goes south, as a matter of course, though I'm
not sure that it is always advisable. I have found the Mediterranean
tiresome very often." He broke off and seemed to lose himself for a
moment in a tangle of vexed thought. Then he resumed quickly:--
"Well, next week, then. Rothesay bay, and the yacht 'Diana.'"

Things being thus settled, we shook hands and parted. In the
interval between his visit and my departure from home I had plenty
to do, and I heard no more of the Harlands, except that I received a
little note from Miss Catherine expressing her pleasure that I had
agreed to accompany them on their cruise.

"You will be very dull, I fear,"--she wrote, kindly--"But not so
dull as we should be without you."

This was a gracious phrase which meant as much or as little as most
such phrases of a conventionally amiable character. Dulness,
however, is a condition of brain and body of which I am seldom
conscious, so that the suggestion of its possibility did not disturb
my outlook. Having resolved to go, I equally resolved to enjoy the
trip to the utmost limit of my capacity for enjoyment, which--
fortunately for myself--is very great. Before my departure from home
I had to listen, of course, to the usual croaking chorus of
acquaintances in the neighbourhood who were not going yachting and
who, according to their own assertion, never would on any account go
yachting. There is a tendency in many persons to decry every
pleasure which they have no chance of sharing, and this was not
lacking among my provincial gossips.

"The weather has been so fine lately that we're sure to have a break
soon,"--said one--"I expect you'll meet gales at sea."

"I hear," said another, "that heavy rains are threatening the west
coast of Scotland."

"Such a bore, yachting!" declared a worthy woman who had never been
on a yacht in her life--"The people on board get sick of each
other's company in a week!"

"Well, you ought to pity me very much, then!"--I said, laughing--
"According to your ideas, a yachting cruise appears to be the last
possible form of physical suffering that can be inflicted on any
human being. But I shall hope to come safely out of it all the
same!"

My visitors gave me a wry smile. It was quite easy to see that they
envied what they considered my good fortune in getting a holiday
under the most luxurious circumstances without its costing me a
penny. This was the only view they took of it. It is the only view
people generally take of any situation,--namely, the financial side.

The night before I left home was to me a memorable one. Nothing of
any outward or apparent interest happened, and I was quite alone,
yet I was conscious of a singular elation of both mind and body as
though I were surrounded by a vibrating atmosphere of light and joy.
It was an impression that came upon me suddenly, seeming to have
little or nothing to do with my own identity, yet withal it was
still so personal that I felt eager to praise for such a rich inflow
of happiness. The impression was purely psychic I knew,--but it was
worth a thousand gifts of material good. Nothing seemed sad,--
nothing seemed difficult in the whole Universe--every shadow of
trouble seemed swept away from a shining sky of peace. I threw open
the lattice window of my study and stepping out on the balcony which
overhung the garden, I stood there dreamily looking out upon the
night. There was no moon; only a million quivering points of light
flashing from the crowded stars in a heaven of dusky blue. The air
was warm, and fragrant with the sweet scent of stocks and
heliotrope,--there was a great silence, for it was fully midnight,
and not even the drowsy twitter of a bird broke the intense quiet.
The world was asleep--or seemed so--although for fifty living
organisms in Nature that sleep there are a thousand that wake, to
whom night is the working day. I listened,--and fancied I could hear
the delicate murmuring of voices hidden among the leaves and behind
the trees, and the thrill of soft music flowing towards me on the
sound-waves of the air. It was one of those supreme moments when I
almost thought I had made some marked progress towards the
attainment of my highest aims,--when the time I had spent and the
patience I had exercised in cultivating and training what may be
called the INWARD powers of sight and hearing were about to be
rewarded by a full opening to my striving spirit of the gates which
had till now been only set ajar. I knew,--for I had studied and
proved the truth,--that every bodily sense we possess is simply an
imperfect outcome of its original and existent faculty in the Soul,-
-that our bodily ears are only the material expressions of that
spiritual hearing which is fine and keen enough to catch the
lightest angel whisper,--that our eyes are but the outward semblance
of those brilliant inner orbs of vision which are made to look upon
the supernal glories of Heaven itself without fear or flinching,--
and that our very sense of touch is but a rough and uncertain
handling of perishable things as compared with that sure and
delicate contact of the Soul's personal being with the etheric
substances pertaining to itself. Despite my eager expectation,
however, nothing more was granted to me then but just that exquisite
sensation of pure joy, which like a rain of light bathed every fibre
of my being. It was enough, I told myself--surely enough!--and yet
it seemed to me there should be something more. It was a promise
with the fulfilment close at hand, yet undeclared,--like a snow-
white cloud with the sun behind it. But I was given no solution of
the rapturous mystery surrounding me,--and--granting my soul an
absolute freedom, it could plunge no deeper than through the
immensity of stars to immensities still more profound, there to
dream and hope and wait. For years I had done this,--for years I had
worked and prayed, watching the pageant of poor human pride and
vanity drift past me like shadows on the shore of a dead sea,--
succeeding little by little in threading my way through the closest
labyrinths of life, and finding out the beautiful reasons of
living;--and every now and then,--as to-night,--I had felt myself on
the verge of a discovery which in its divine simplicity should make
all problems clear and all difficulties easy, when I had been gently
but firmly held back by a force invisible, and warned, 'Thus far,
and no farther!' To oppose this force or make any personal effort to
rebel against it, is no part of my faith,--therefore at such moments
I had always yielded instantly and obediently as I yielded now. I
was not allowed to fathom the occult source of my happiness, but the
happiness remained,--and when I retired to rest it was with more
than ordinary gratitude that I said my usual brief prayer:--For the
day that is past, I thank Thee, O God my Father! For the night that
has come, I thank Thee! As one with Thee and with Nature I
gratefully take the rest Thou hast lovingly ordained. Whether I
sleep or wake my body and soul are Thine. Do with them as Thou wilt,
for Thy command is my joy. Amen.

I slept as soundly and peacefully as a child, and the next day
started on my journey in the brightest of bright summer weather. A
friend travelled with me--one of those amiable women to whom life is
always pleasant because of the pleasantness in their own natures;
she had taken a house for the season in Inverness-shire, and I had
arranged to join her there when my trip with the Harlands was over,
or rather, I should say, when they had grown weary of me and I of
them. The latter chance was, thought my friend, whom I will call
Francesca, most likely.

"There's no greater boredom,"--she declared--"than the society of an
imaginative invalid. Such company will not be restful to you,--it
will tire you out. Morton Harland himself may be really ill, as he
says--I shouldn't wonder if he is, for he looks it!--but his
daughter has nothing whatever the matter with her,--except nerves."

"Nerves are bad enough,"--I said.

"Nerves can be conquered,"--she answered, with a bright smile of
wholesome conviction--"Nerves are generally--well!--just
selfishness!"

There was some truth in this, but we did not argue the point
further. We were too much engrossed with the interests of our
journey north, and with the entertainment provided for us by our
fellow-travellers. The train for Edinburgh and Glasgow was crowded
with men of that particular social class who find grouse-shooting an
intelligent way of using their brain and muscle, and gun-cases
cumbered the ground in every corner. It wanted yet several days to
the famous Twelfth of August, but the weather was so exceptionally
fine and brilliant that the exodus from town had begun earlier than
was actually necessary for the purposes of slaughter. Francesca and
I studied the faces and figures of our companions with lively and
unabated interest. We had a reserved compartment to ourselves, and
from its secluded privacy we watched the restless pacing up and down
in the adjacent corridor of sundry male creatures who seemed to have
nothing whatever to think about but the day's newspaper, and nothing
to do but smoke.

"I am sure," said Francesca, suddenly--"that in the beginning of
creation we were all beasts and birds of prey, eating each other up
and tearing each other to pieces. The love of prey is in us still."

"Not in you, surely?" I queried, with a smile.

"Oh, I am not talking or thinking of myself. I'm just--a woman. So
are you--a woman--and something more, perhaps--something not like
the rest of us." Here her kind eyes regarded me a trifle wistfully."
I can't quite make you out sometimes,--I wish I could! But--apart
from you and me--look at a few of these men! One has just passed our
window who has the exact physiognomy of a hawk,--cruel eyes and
sharp nose like a voracious beak. Another I noticed a minute ago
with a perfectly pig-like face,--he does not look rightly placed on
two legs, his natural attitude is on four legs, grunting with his
snout in the gutter!"

I laughed.

"You are a severe critic, Francesca!"

"Not I. I'm not criticising at all. But I can't help seeing
resemblances. And sometimes they are quite appalling. Now you, for
instance,"--here she laid a hand tentatively on mine--"you, in your
mysterious ideas of religion, actually believe that persons who lead
evil lives and encourage evil thoughts, descend the scale from which
they have risen and go back to the lowest forms of life--"

"I do believe that certainly"--I answered--"But--"

"'But me no buts,'"--she interrupted--"I tell you there are people
in this world whom I see IN THE VERY ACT OF DESCENDING! And it makes
me grow cold!"

I could well understand her feeling. I had experienced it often.
Nothing has ever filled me with a more hopeless sense of inadequacy
and utter uselessness than to watch, as I am often compelled to
watch, the deplorable results of the determined choice made by
certain human beings to go backward and downward rather than forward
and upward,--a choice in which no outside advice can be of any avail
because they will not take it even if it is offered. It is a life-
and-death matter for their own wills to determine,--and no power,
human or divine, can alter the course they elect to adopt. As well
expect that God would revert His law of gravitation to save the
silly suicide who leaps to destruction from tower or steeple, as
that He would change the eternal working of His higher Spiritual Law
to rescue the resolved Soul which, knowing the difference between
good and evil, deliberately prefers evil. If an angel of light, a
veritable 'Son of the Morning' rebels, he must fall from Heaven.
There is no alternative; until of his own free-will he chooses to
rise again.

My friend and I had often talked together on these knotty points
which tangled up what should be the straightness of many a life's
career, and as we mutually knew each other's opinions we did not
discuss them at the moment.

Time passed quickly,--the train rushed farther and farther north,
and by six o'clock on that warm, sunshiny afternoon we were in the
grimy city of Glasgow, from whence we went on to a still grimier
quarter, Greenock, where we put up for the night. The 'best' hotel
was a sorry affair, but we were too tired to mind either a bad
dinner or uncomfortable rooms, and went to bed glad of any place
wherein to sleep. Next morning we woke up very early, refreshed and
joyous, in time to see the sun rise in a warm mist of gold over a
huge man-o'-war outside Greenock harbour,--a sight which, in its
way, was very fine and rather suggestive of a Turner picture.

"Dear old Sol!" said Francesca, shading her eyes as she looked at
the dazzle of glory--"His mission is to sustain life,--and the
object of that war-vessel bathed in all his golden rays is to
destroy it. What unscrupulous villains men are! Why cannot nations
resolve on peace and amity, and if differences arise agree to settle
them by arbitration? It's such a pagan and brutal thing to kill
thousands of innocent men just because Governments quarrel."

"I entirely agree with you,"--I said--"All the same I don't approve
of Governments that preach peace while they drain the people's
pockets for the purpose of increasing armaments, after the German
fashion. Let us be ready with adequate defences,--but it's surely
very foolish to cripple our nation at home by way of preparation for
wars which may never happen."

"And yet they MAY happen!" said Francesca, her eyes still dreamily
watching the sunlit heavens--"Everything in the Universe is engaged
in some sort of a fight, so it seems to me. The tiniest insects are
for ever combating each other. In the very channels of our own blood
the poisonous and non-poisonous germs are constantly striving for
the mastery, and how can we escape the general ordainment? Life
itself is a continual battle between good and evil, and if it were
not so we should have no object in living. The whole business is
evidently intended to be a dose conflict to the end."

"There is no end!" I said.

She looked at me almost compassionately.

"So you imagine!"

I smiled.

"So I KNOW!"

A vague expression flitted over her face,--an expression with which
I had become familiar. She was a most lovable and intelligent
creature, but she could not think very far,--the effort wearied and
perplexed her.

"Well, then, it must be an everlasting skirmish, I suppose!" she
said, laughingly,--"I wonder if our souls will ever get tired!"

"Do you think God ever gets tired?" I asked.

She looked startled,--then amused.

"He ought to!" she declared, with vivacity--"I don't mean to be
irreverent, but really, what with all the living things in all the
millions of worlds trying to get what they ought not to have, and
wailing and howling when they are disappointed of their wishes, He
ought to be very, very tired!"

"But He is not,"--I said;--"If He were, there would indeed be an end
of all! Should the Creator be weary of His work, the work would be
undone. I wish we thought of this more often!"

She put her arm round me kindly.

"You are a strange creature!" she said--"You think a great deal too
much of all these abstruse subjects. After all, I'm glad you are
going on this cruise with the Harland people. They will bring you
down from the spheres with a run! They will, I'm sure! You'll hear
no conversation that does not turn on baths, medicines, massage, and
general cure-alls! And when you come on to stay with me in
Inverness-shire you'll be quite commonplace and sensible!"

I smiled. The dear Francesca always associated 'the commonplace and
sensible' together, as though they were fitted to companion each
other. The complete reverse is, of course, the case, for the
'commonplace' is generally nothing more than the daily routine of
body which is instinctively followed by beasts and birds as equally
as by man, and has no more to do with real 'sense' or pure mentality
than the ticking of a watch has to do with the enormous forces of
the sun. What we call actual 'Sense' is the perception of the Soul,-
-a perception which cannot be limited to things which are merely
material, inasmuch as it passes beyond outward needs and appearances
and reaches to the causes which create those outward needs and
appearances. I was, however, satisfied to leave my friend in
possession of the field of argument, the more readily as our parting
from each other was so near at hand.

We journeyed together by the steamer 'Columba' to Rothesay, where,
on entering the beautiful bay, crowded at this season with pleasure
craft, the first object which attracted our attention was the very
vessel for which I was bound, the 'Diana,' one of the most
magnificent yachts ever built to gratify the whim of a millionaire.
Tourists on board our steamer at once took up positions where they
could obtain the best view of her, and many were the comments we
heard concerning her size and the beauty of her lines as she rode at
anchor on the sunlit water.

"You'll be in a floating palace,"--said Francesca, as we approached
Rothesay pier, and she bade me an affectionate adieu--"Now take care
of yourself, and don't fly away to the moon on what you call an
etheric vibration! Remember, if you get tired of the Harlands to
come to me at once."

I promised, and we parted. On landing at Rothesay I was almost
immediately approached by a sailor from the 'Diana,' who, spying my
name on my luggage, quickly possessed himself of it and told me the
motor launch was in waiting to take me over to the yacht. I was on
my way across the sparkling bay before the 'Columba' started out
again from the pier, and Francesca, standing on the steamer's deck,
waved to me a smiling farewell as I went. In about ten minutes I was
on board the 'Diana,' shaking hands with Morton Harland and his
daughter Catherine, who, wrapped up in shawls on a deck chair,
looked as though she were guarding herself from the chills of a
rigorous winter rather than basking in the warm sunshine of a summer
morning.

"You look very well!"--she said, in tones of plaintive amiability--
"And so wonderfully bright!"

"It's such a bright day,"--I answered, feeling as if I ought somehow
to apologise for a healthy appearance, "One can't help being happy!"

She sighed and smiled faintly, and her maid appearing at that moment
to take my travelling bag and wraps, I was shown the cabin, or
rather the state-room which was to be mine during the cruise. It was
a luxurious double apartment, bedroom and sitting-room together,
divided only by the hanging folds of a rich crimson silk curtain,
and exquisitely fitted with white enamelled furniture ornamented
with hand-wrought silver. The bed had no resemblance whatever to a
ship's berth, but was an elaborate full-sized affair, canopied in
white silk embroidered with roses; the carpet was of a thick
softness into which my feet sank as though it were moss, and a tall
silver and crystal vase, full of gorgeous roses, was placed at the
foot of a standing mirror framed in silver, so that the blossoms
were reflected double. The sitting-room was provided with easy
chairs, a writing-table, and a small piano, and here, too, masses of
roses showed their fair faces from every corner. It was all so
charming that I could not help uttering an exclamation of delight,
and the maid who was unpacking my things smiled sympathetically.

"It's perfectly lovely!" I said, turning to her with eagerness--
"It's quite a little fairyland! But isn't this Miss Harland's
cabin?"

"Oh dear no, miss,"--she replied--"Miss Harland wouldn't have all
these things about her on any account. There are no carpets or
curtains in Miss Harland's rooms. She thinks them very unhealthy.
She has only a bit of matting on the floor, and an iron bedstead--
all very plain. And as for roses!--she wouldn't have a rose near her
for ever so!--she can't bear the smell of them."

I made no comment. I was too enchanted with my surroundings for the
moment to consider how uncomfortable my hostess chose to make
herself.

"Who arranged these rooms?" I asked.

"Mr. Harland gave orders to the steward to make them as pretty as he
could,"--said the maid--"John" and she blushed--"has a lot of
taste."

I smiled. I saw at once how matters were between her and "John."
Just then there was a sound of thudding and grinding above my head,
and I realised that we were beginning to weigh anchor. Quickly tying
on my yachting cap and veil, I hurried on deck, and was soon
standing beside my host, who seemed pleased at the alacrity with
which I had joined him, and I watched with feelings of indescribable
exhilaration the 'Diana' being loosed from her moorings. Steam was
up, and in a very short time her bowsprit swung round and pointed
outward from the bay. Quivering like an eager race-horse ready to
start, she sprang forward; and then, with a stately sweeping curve,
glided across the water, catting it into bright wavelets with her
sword-like keel and churning a path behind her of opalescent foam.
We were off on our voyage of pleasure at last,--a voyage which the
Fates had determined should, for one adventurer at least, lead to
strange regions as yet unexplored. But no premonitory sign was given
to me, or suggestion that I might be the one chosen to sail 'the
perilous seas of fairy lands forlorn'--for in spiritual things of
high import, the soul that is most concerned is always the least
expectant.




II

THE FAIRY SHIP


I was introduced that evening at dinner to Mr. Harland's physician,
and also to his private secretary. I was not greatly prepossessed in
favour of either of these gentlemen. Dr. Brayle was a dark, slim,
clean-shaven man of middle age with expressionless brown eyes and
sleek black hair which was carefully brushed and parted down the
middle,--he was quiet and self-contained in manner, and yet I
thought I could see that he was fully alive to the advantages of his
position as travelling medical adviser to an American millionaire. I
have not mentioned till now that Morton Harland was an American. I
was always rather in the habit of forgetting the fact, as he had
long ago forsworn his nationality and had naturalised himself as a
British subject. But he had made his vast fortune in America, and
was still the controlling magnate of many large financial interests
in the States. He was, however, much more English than American, for
he had been educated at Oxford, and as a young man had been always
associated with English society and English ways. He had married an
English wife, who died when their first child, his daughter, was
born, and he was wont to set down all Miss Catherine's mopish
languors to a delicacy inherited from her mother, and to lack of a
mother's care in childhood. In my opinion Catherine was robust
enough, but it was evident that from a very early age she had been
given her own way to the fullest extent, and had been so accustomed
to have every little ailment exaggerated and made the most of that
she had grown to believe health of body and mind as well-nigh
impossible to the human being. Dr. Brayle, I soon perceived, lent
himself to this attitude, and I did not like the covert gleam of his
mahogany-coloured eyes as he glanced rapidly from father to daughter
in the pauses of conversation, watching them as narrowly as a cat
might watch a couple of unwary mice. The secretary, Mr. Swinton, was
a pale, precise-looking young man with a somewhat servile demeanour,
under which he concealed an inordinately good opinion of himself.
His ideas were centred in and bounded by the art of stenography,--he
was an adept in shorthand and typewriting, could jot down, I forget
how many crowds of jostling words a minute, and never made a
mistake. He was a clock-work model of punctuality and dispatch, of
respectfulness and obedience,--but he was no more than a machine,--
he could not be moved to a spontaneous utterance or a spontaneous
smile, unless both smile and utterance were the result of some
pleasantness affecting himself. Neither Dr. Brayle nor Mr. Swinton
were men whom one could positively like or dislike,--they simply had
the power of creating an atmosphere in which my spirit found itself
swimming like a gold-fish in a bowl, wondering how it got in and how
it could get out.

As I sat rather silently at table I felt, rather than saw, Dr.
Brayle regarding me with a kind of perplexed curiosity. I was as
fully aware of his sensations as of my own,--I knew that my presence
irritated him, though he was not clever enough to explain even to
himself the cause of his irritation. So far as Mr. Swinton was
concerned, he was comfortably wrapped up in a pachydermatous hide of
self-appreciation, so that he thought nothing about me one way or
the other except as a guest of his patrons, and one therefore to
whom he was bound to be civil. But with Dr. Brayle it was otherwise.
I was a puzzle to him, and--after a brief study of me--an annoyance.
He forced himself into conversation with me, however, and we
interchanged a few remarks on the weather and on the various
beauties of the coast along which we had been sailing all day.

"I see that you care very much for fine scenery," he said--"Few
women do."

"Really?" And I smiled. "Is admiration of the beautiful a special
privilege of men only?"

"It should be,"--he answered, with a little bow--"We are the
admirers of your sex."

I made no answer. Mr. Harland looked at me with a somewhat quizzical
air.

"You are not a believer in compliments," he said.

"Was it a compliment?" I asked, laughingly--"I'm afraid I'm very
dense! I did not see that it was meant as one."

Dr. Brayle's dark brows drew together in a slight frown. With that
expression on his face he looked very much like an Italian poisoner
of old time,--the kind of man whom Caesar Borgia might have employed
to give the happy dispatch to his enemies by some sure and
undiscoverable means known only to intricate chemistry.

Presently Mr. Harland spoke again, while he peeled a pear slowly and
delicately with a deft movement of his fruit knife that suggested
cruelty and the flaying alive of some sentient thing.

"Our little friend is of a rather strange disposition," he observed-
-"She has the indifference of an old-world philosopher to the saying
of speeches that are merely socially agreeable. She is ardent in
soul, but suspicious in mind! She imagines that a pleasant word may
often be used to cover a treacherous action, and if a man is as rude
and blunt as myself, for example, she prefers that he should be rude
and blunt rather than that he should attempt to conceal his
roughness by an amiability which it is not his nature to feel." Here
he looked up at me from the careful scrutiny of his nearly flayed
pear. "Isn't that so?"

"Certainly,"--I answered--"But that's not a 'strange' or original
attitude of mind."

The corners of his ugly mouth curled satirically.

"Pardon me, dear lady, it is! The normal and strictly reasonable
attitude of the healthy human Pigmy is that It should accept as
gospel all that It is told of a nature soothing and agreeable to
Itself. It should believe, among other things, that It is a very
precious Pigmy among natural forces, destined to be immortal, and to
share with Divine Intelligence the privileges of Heaven. Put out by
the merest trifle, troubled by a spasm, driven almost to howling by
a toothache, and generally helpless in all very aggravated adverse
circumstances, It should still console Itself with the idea that Its
being, Its proportions and perfections are superb enough to draw
down Deity into a human shape as a creature of human necessities in
order that It, the Pigmy, should claim kinship with the Divine now
and for ever! What gorgeous blasphemy in such a scheme!--what
magnificent arrogance!" I was silent, but I could almost hear my
heart beating with suppressed emotion. I knew Morton Harland was an
atheist, so far as atheism is possible to any creature born of
spirit as well as matter, but I did not think he would air his
opinions so openly and at once before me the first evening of my
stay on board his yacht. I saw, however, that he spoke in this way
hoping to move me to an answering argument for the amusement of
himself and the other two men present, and therefore I did what was
incumbent upon me to do in such a situation--held my peace. Dr.
Brayle watched me curiously,--and poor Catherine Harland turned her
plaintive eyes upon me full of alarm. She had learned to dread her
father's fondness for starting topics which led to religious
discussions of a somewhat heated nature. But as I did not speak, Mr.
Harland was placed in the embarrassing position of a person
propounding a theory which no one shows any eagerness to accept or
to deny, and, looking slightly confused, he went on in a lighter and
more casual way--

"I had a friend once at Oxford,--a wonderful fellow, full of strange
dreams and occult fancies. He was one of those who believed in the
Divine half of man. He used to study curious old books and
manuscripts till long past midnight, and never seemed tired. His
father had lived by choice in some desert corner of Egypt for forty
years, and in Egypt this boy had been born. Of his mother he never
spoke. His father died suddenly and left him a large fortune under
trustees till he came of age, with instructions that he was to be
taken to England and educated at Oxford, and that when he came into
possession of his money, he was to be left free to do as he liked
with it. I met him when he was almost half-way through his
University course. I was only two or three years his senior, but he
always looked much younger than I. And he was, as we all said,
'uncanny '--as uncanny as our little friend,"--here indicating me by
a nod of his head and a smile which was meant to be kindly--"He
never practised or 'trained' for anything and yet all things came
easily to him. He was as magnificent in his sports as he was in his
studies, and I remember--how well I remember it!--that there came a
time at last when we all grew afraid of him. If we saw him coming
along the 'High' we avoided him,--he had something of terror as well
as admiration for us,--and though I was of his college and
constantly thrown into association with him, I soon became infected
with the general scare. One night he stopped me in the quadrangle
where he had his rooms--"

Here Mr. Harland broke off suddenly.

"I'm boring you,"--he said--"I really have no business to inflict
the recollections of my youth upon you."

Dr. Brayle's brown eyes showed a glistening animal interest.

"Pray go on!" he urged--"It sounds like the chapter of a romance."

"I'm not a believer in romance,"--said Mr. Harland, grimly--"Facts
are enough in themselves without any embroidered additions. This
fellow was a Fact,--a healthy, strong, energetic, living Fact. He
stopped me in the quadrangle as I tell you,--and he laid his hand on
my shoulder. I shrank from his touch, and had a restless desire to
get away from him. 'What's the matter with you, Harland?' he said,
in a grave, musical voice that was peculiarly his own--'You seem
afraid of me. If you are, the fault is in yourself, not in me!' I
shuffled my feet about on the stone pavement, not knowing what to
say--then I stammered out the foolish excuses young men make when
they find themselves in an awkward corner. He listened to my
stammering remarks about 'the other fellows' with attentive
patience,--then he took his hand from my shoulder with a quick,
decisive movement. 'Look here, Harland'--he said--'You are taking up
all the conventions and traditions with which our poor old Alma
Mater is encrusted, and sticking them over you like burrs. They'll
cling, remember! It's a pity you choose this way of going,--I'm
starting at the farther end--where Oxford leaves off and Life
begins!' I suppose I stared--for he went on--'I mean Life that goes
forward,--not Life that goes backward, picking up the stale crumbs
fallen from centuries that have finished their banquet and passed
on. There!--I won't detain you! We shall not meet often--but don't
forget what I have said,--that if you are afraid of me, or of any
other man, or of any existing thing,--the fault is in yourself, not
in the persons or objects you fear.' 'I don't see it,' I blurted
out, angrily--'What of the other fellows? They think you're queer!'
He laughed. 'Bless the other fellows!' he said--'They're with you in
the same boat! They think me queer because THEY are queer--that is,-
-out of line--themselves.' I was irritated by his easy indifference
and asked him what he meant by 'out of line.' 'Suppose you see a
beautiful garden harmoniously planned,' he said, still smiling, 'and
some clumsy fellow comes along and puts a crooked pigstye up among
the flower beds, you would call that "out of line," wouldn't you?
Unsuitable, to say the least of it?' 'Oh!' I said, hotly--'So you
consider me and my friends crooked pigstyes in your landscape?' He
made me a gay, half apologetic gesture. 'Something of the type, dear
boy!' he said--'But don't worry! The crooked pigstye is always a
most popular kind of building in the world you will live in!' With
that he bade me good-night, and went. I was very angry with him, for
I was a conceited youth and thought myself and my particular
associates the very cream of Oxford,--but he took all the highest
honours that year, and when he finally left the University he
vanished, so to speak, in a blaze of intellectual glory. I have
never seen him again--and never heard of him--and so I suppose his
studies led him nowhere. He must be an elderly man now,--he may be
lame, blind, lunatic, or what is more probable still, he may be
dead, and I don't know why I think of him except that his theories
were much the same as those of our little friend,"--again indicating
me by a nod--"He never cared for agreeable speeches,--always rather
mistrusted social conventions, and believed in a Higher Life after
Death."

"Or a Lower,"--I put in, quietly.

"Ah yes! There must be a Down grade, of course, if there is an Up.
The two would be part of each other's existence. But as I accept
neither, the point does not matter."

I looked at him, and I suppose my looks expressed wonder or pity or
both, for he averted his glance from mine.

"You are something of a spiritualist, I believe?"--said Dr. Brayle,
lifting his hard eyes from the scrutiny of the tablecloth and fixing
them upon me.

"Not at all,"--I answered, at once, and with emphasis. "That is, if
you mean by the term 'spiritualist' a credulous person who believes
in mediumistic trickery, automatic writing and the like. That is
sheer nonsense and self-deception."

"Several experienced scientists give these matters considerable
attention,"--suggested Mr. Swinton, primly.

I smiled.

"Science, like everything else, has its borderland," I said--"from
which the brain can easily slip off into chaos. The most approved
scientific professors are liable to this dire end of their
speculations. They forget that in order to understand the Infinite
they must first be sure of the Infinite in themselves."

"You speak like an oracle, fair lady!"--said Mr. Harland--"But
despite your sage utterances Man remains as finite as ever."

"If he chooses the finite state certainly he does,"--I answered--"He
is always what he elects to be."

Mr. Harland seemed desirous of continuing the argument, but I would
say no more. The topic was too serious and sacred with me to allow
it to be lightly discussed by persons whose attitude of mind was
distinctly opposed and antipathetic to all things beyond the merely
mundane.

After dinner, Miss Catherine professed herself to be suffering from
neuralgia, and gathering up her shawls and wraps asked me to excuse
her for going to bed early. I bade her good-night, and, leaving my
host and the two other men to their smoke, I went up on deck. We
were anchored off Mull, and against a starlit sky of exceptional
clearness the dark mountains of Morven were outlined with a softness
as of black velvet. The yacht rested on perfectly calm waters,
shining like polished steel,--and the warm stillness of the summer
night was deliciously soothing and restful. Our captain and one or
two of the sailors were about on duty, and I sat in the stern of the
vessel looking up into the glorious heavens. The tapering bow-sprit
of the 'Diana' pointed aloft as it were into a woven web of stars,
and I lost myself in imaginary flight among those glittering unknown
worlds, oblivious of my material surroundings, and forgetting that
despite the splendid evidences of a governing Intelligence in the
beauty and order of the Universe spread about them every day, my
companions in the journey of pleasure we were undertaking together
were actually destitute of all faith in God, and had less perception
of the existing Divine than the humblest plant may possess that
instinctively forces its way upward to the light. I did not think of
this,--it was no use thinking about it as I could not better the
position,--but I found myself curiously considering the story Mr.
Harland had told about his college friend at Oxford. I tried to
picture his face and figure till presently it seemed as if I saw
him,--indeed I could have sworn that a man's shadowy form stood
immediately in front of me, bending upon me a searching glance from
eyes that were strangely familiar. Startled at this wraith of my own
fancy, I half rose from my chair--then sank back again with a laugh
at my imagination's too vivid power of portrayal. A figure did
certainly present itself, but one of sufficient bulk to convince me
of its substantiality. This was the captain of the 'Diana,' a
cheery-looking personage of a thoroughly nautical type, who,
approaching me, lifted his cap and said:

"That's a wonderfully fine yacht that has just dropped anchor behind
us. She's illuminated, too. Have you seen her?"

"No," I answered, and turned in the direction he indicated. An
involuntary exclamation escaped me. There, about half a mile to our
rear, floated a schooner of exquisite proportions and fairy-like
grace, outlined from stem to stern by delicate borderings of
electric light as though decorated for some great festival, and
making quite a glittering spectacle in the darkness of the deepening
night. We could see active figures at work on deck--the sails were
dropped and quickly furled,--but the quivering radiance remained
running up every tapering mast and spar, so that the whole vessel
seemed drawn on the dusky air with pencil points of fire. I stood
up, gazing at the wonderful sight in silent amazement and
admiration, with the captain beside me, and it was he who first
spoke.

"I can't make her out,"--he said, perplexedly,--"We never heard a
sound except just when she dropped anchor, and that was almost
noiseless. How she came round the point yonder so suddenly is a
mystery! I was keeping a sharp look-out, too."

"Surely she's very large for a sailing vessel?" I queried.

"The largest I've ever seen,"--he replied--"But how did she sail?
That's what I want to know!"

He looked so puzzled that I laughed.

"Well, I suppose in the usual way,"--I said--"With sails."

"Ay, that's all very well!"--and he glanced at me with a
compassionate air as at one who knew nothing about seafaring--"But
sails must have wind, and there hasn't been a capful all the
afternoon or evening. Yet she came in with crowded canvas full out
as if there was a regular sou'wester, and found her anchorage as
easy as you please. All in a minute, too. If there was a wind it
wasn't a wind belonging to this world! Wouldn't Mr. Harland perhaps
like to see her?"

I took the hint and ran down into the saloon, which by this time was
full of the stifling odours of smoke and whisky. Mr. Harland was
there, drinking and talking somewhat excitedly with Dr. Brayle,
while his secretary listened and looked on. I explained why I had
ventured to interrupt their conversation, and they accompanied me up
on deck. The strange yacht looked more bewilderingly brilliant than
ever, the heavens having somewhat clouded over, and as we all, the
captain included, leaned over our own deck rail and gazed at her
shining outlines, we heard the sound of delicious music and singing
floating across the quiet sea.

"Some millionaire's toy,"--said Mr. Harland--"She's floating from
the mysterious yacht." It was a music full of haunting sweetness and
rhythmic melody, and I was not sure whether it was evolved from
stringed instruments or singing voices. By climbing up on the sofa
in my sitting-room I could look out through the port-hole on the
near sea, rippling close to me, and bringing, as I fancied, with
every ripple a new cadence, a tenderer snatch of tune. A subtle
scent was on the salt air, as of roses mingling with the freshness
of the scarcely moving waters,--it came, I thought, from the
beautiful blossoms which so lavishly adorned my rooms. I could not
see the yacht from my point of observation, but I could hear the
music she had on board, and that was enough for immediate delight.

Leaving the port-hole open, I lay down on the sofa immediately
beneath it and comprised myself to listen. The soft breath of the
sea blew on my cheeks, and with every breath the delicate vibrations
of appealing harmony rose and fell--it was as if these enchanting
sounds were being played or sung for me alone. In a delicious
languor I drowsed, as it were, with my eyes open,--losing myself in
a labyrinth of happy dreams and fancies which came to me unbidden,--
till presently the music died softly away like a retreating wave and
ceased altogether. I waited a few minutes--listening breathlessly
lest it should begin again and I lose some note of it,--then hearing
no more, I softly closed the port-hole and drew the curtain. I did
this with an odd reluctance, feeling somehow that I had shut out a
friend; and I half apologised to this vague sentiment by reminding
myself of the lateness of the hour. It was nearly midnight. I had
intended writing to Francesca,--but I was now disinclined for
anything but rest. The music which had so entranced me throbbed
still in my ears and made my heart beat with a quick sense of joy,-
children--there may be several inoffensive reasons for his lighting
up, and he may think no more of advertisement than you or I."

"That's true,"--assented Dr. Brayle, with a quick concession to his
patron's humour. "But people nowadays do so many queer things for
mere notoriety's sake that it is barely possible to avoid suspecting
them. They will even kill themselves in order to be talked about."

"Fortunately they don't hear what's said of them,"--returned Mr.
Harland--"or they might alter their minds and remain alive. It's
hardly worth while to hang yourself in order to be called a fool!"

While this talk went on I remained silent, watching the illuminated
schooner with absorbed fascination. Suddenly, while I still gazed
upon her, every spark with which she was, as it were, bejewelled,
went out, and only the ordinary lamps common to the watches of the
night on board a vessel at anchorage burned dimly here and there
like red winking eyes. For the rest, she was barely visible save by
an indistinct tracery of blurred black lines. The swiftness with
which her brilliancy had been eclipsed startled us all and drew from
Captain Derrick the remark that it was 'rather queer.'

"What pantomimists call a 'quick change'"--said Mr. Harland, with a
laugh--"The show is over for to-night. Let us turn in. To-morrow
morning we'll try and make acquaintance with the stranger, and find
out for Captain Derrick's comfort how she managed to sail without
wind!"

We bade each other good-night then, and descended to our several
quarters.

When I found myself alone in the luxurious state-room 'suite'
allotted to me, the first thing I did was to open one of the port-
holes and listen to the music which still came superbly built,--
sailing vessels are always more elegant than steam, though not half
so useful. I expect she'll lie becalmed here for a day or two."

"It's a wonder she's got round here at all,"--said the captain--
"There wasn't any wind to bring her."

Mr. Harland looked amused.

"There must have been SOME wind, Derrick,"--he answered--"Only it
wasn't boisterous enough for a hardy salt like you to feel it."

"There wasn't a breath,"--declared Derrick, firmly--"Not enough to
blow a baby's curl."

"Then how did she get here?" asked Dr. Brayle.

Captain Derrick's lifted eyebrows expressed his inability to solve
the enigma.

"I said just now if there was a wind it wasn't a wind belonging to
this world--"

Mr. Harland turned upon him quickly.

"Well, there are no winds belonging to other worlds that will ever
disturb OUR atmosphere,"--he said--"Come, come, Derrick, you don't
think that yacht is a ghost, do you?--a sort of 'Flying Dutchman'
spectre?"

Captain Derrick smiled broadly.

"No, sir--I don't! There's flesh and blood aboard--I've seen the men
hauling down canvas, and I know that. But the way she sailed in
bothers me."

"All that electric light is rather ostentatious,"--said Dr. Brayle--
"I suppose the owner wants to advertise his riches."

"That doesn't follow," said Mr. Harland, with some sharpness--"I
grant you we live in an advertising age, but I don't fancy the owner
of that vessel is a Pill or a Plaster or even a Special Tea. He may
want to amuse himself--it may be the birthday of his wife or one of
his and a warm atmosphere of peace and comfort came over me when at
last I lay down in my luxurious bed, and slipped away into the land
of sleep. Ah, what a land it is, that magic Land of Sleep!--a land
'shadowing with wings,' where amid many shifting and shimmering
wonders of darkness and light, the Palace of Vision stands uplifted,
stately and beautiful, with golden doors set open to the wanderer! I
made my entrance there that night;--often and often as I had been
within its enchanted precincts before, there were a million halls of
marvel as yet unvisited,--and among these I found myself,--under a
dome which seemed of purest crystal lit with fire,--listening to One
invisible, who,--speaking as from a great height, discoursed to me
of Love."




III

THE ANGEL OF A DREAM


The Voice that spoke to me was silvery clear, and fell as it were
through the air, dividing space with sweetness. It was soft and
resonant, and the thrill of tenderness within it was as though an
angel sang through tears. Never had I heard anything so divinely
pure and compassionate,--and all my being strove to lift itself
towards that supernal height which seemed to be the hidden source of
its melodious utterance.

"O Soul, wandering in the region of sleep and dreams!" said the
Voice,--"What is all thy searching and labour worth without Love?
Why art thou lost in a Silence without Song?"

I raised my eyes, seeking for the one who thus spoke to me, but
could see nothing.

"In Life's great choral symphony"--the Voice continued--"the keynote
of the dominant melody is Love! Without the keynote there can be no
music,--there is dumbness where there should be sound,--there is
discord where there should be harmony. Love!--the one vibrant tone
to which the whole universe moves in tune,--Love, the breath of God,
the pulsation of His Being, the glory of His work, the fulfilment of
His Eternal Joy,--Love, and Love alone, is the web and texture and
garment of happy Immortality! O Soul that seekest the way to wisdom
and to power, what dost thou make of Love?"

I trembled and stood mute. It seemed that I was surrounded by solemn
Presences whose nearness I could feel but not see, and unknowing who
it was that spoke to me, I was afraid to answer.

"Far in the Past, thousands of ages ago," went on the Voice--"the
world we call the Sorrowful Star was a perfect note in a perfect
scale. It was in tune with the Divine Symphony. But with the sweep
of centuries it has lagged behind; it has fallen from Light into
Shadow. And rather than rise to Light again, it has made of itself a
discord opposed to the eternal Harmony. It has chosen for its
keynote Hate,--not Love! Each nation envies or despises the other,--
each man struggles against his fellow-man and grudges his neighbour
every small advantage,--and more than all, each Creed curses the
other, blasphemously calling upon God to verify and fulfil the
curse! Hate, not Love!--this is the false note struck by the pitiful
Earth-world to-day, swinging out of all concordance with spherical
sweetness!--Hate that prefers falsehood to truth, malice to
kindness, selfishness to generosity! O Sorrowful Star!--doomed so
soon to perish!--turn, turn, even in thy last moments, back to the
Divine Ascendant before it is too late!"

I listened,--and a sense of hopeless fear possessed me. I tried to
speak, and a faint whisper crept from my lips. "Why,"--I murmured to
myself, for I did not suppose anyone could or would hear me--"why
should we and our world perish? We knew so little at the beginning,
and we know so little now,--is it altogether our fault if we have
lost our way?"

A silence followed. A vague, impalpable sense of restraint and
captivity seemed closing me in on every side,--I was imprisoned, as
I thought, within invisible walls. Then all at once this density of
atmosphere was struck asunder by a dazzling light as of cloven
wings, but I could see no actual shape or even suggestion of
substance--the glowing rays were all. And the Voice spoke again with
grave sweetness and something of reproach.

"Who speaks of losing the way?" it asked--"when the way is, and has
ever been, clear and plain? Nature teaches it,--Law and Order
support it. Obey and ye shall live: disobey and ye shall die! There
is no other ruling than this out of Chaos! Who is it that speaks of
losing the way, when the way is, and has been and ever shall be,
clear and plain?"

I stretched out my hands involuntarily. My eyes filled with tears.

"O Angel invisible!" I prayed--"Forgive my weakness and unwisdom!
How can the world be saved or comforted by a Love it never finds!"

Again a silence. Again that dazzling, quivering radiance, flashing
as in an atmosphere of powdered gold.

"What does the world seek most ardently?" it demanded--"The Love of
God?--or the Love of Self? If it seeks the first, all things in
heaven and earth shall be added to its desire--if the second, all
shall be taken from it, even that which it hath!"

I had, as I thought, no answer to give, but I covered my weeping
eyes with both hands and knelt before the unseen speaker as to some
great Spirit enthroned.

"Love is not Love that loves Itself,"--went on the Voice--"Self is
the Image, not the God. Wouldst thou have Eternal Life? Then find
the secret in Eternal Love!--'Love, which can move worlds and create
universes,--the love of soul for soul, angel for angel, god for
god!"

I raised my head, and, uncovering my eyes, looked up. But I could
see nothing save that all-penetrating light which imprisoned me as
it were in a circle of fire.

"Love is that Power which clasps the things of eternity and makes
them all its own,"--said the Voice in stronger tones of deeper
music--"It builds its solar system, its stars, its planets with a
thought!--it wakes all beauty, all delight with a smile!--it lives
not only now, but for ever, in a heaven of pure joy where every
thousand years is but one summer day! To Love there is no time, no
space, no age, no death!--what it gives it receives again,--what it
longs for comes to it without seeking--God withholds nothing from
the faithful soul!"

I still knelt, wondering if these words were intended only for me or
for some other listener, for I could not now feel sure that I was
without a companion in this strange experience.

"There is only one Way of Life,"--went on the Voice--"Only one way--
the Way of Love! Whosoever loves greatly lives greatly; whosoever
misprizes Love is dead though living. Give all thy heart and soul to
Love if thou wouldst be immortal!--for without Love thou mayst seek
God through all Eternity and never find Him!"

I waited,--there was a brief silence. Then a sudden wave of music
broke upon my ears,--a breaking foam of rhythmic melody that rose
and fell in a measured cadence of solemn sound. Raising my eyes in
fear and awe, I saw the lambent light around me begin to separate
into countless gradations of delicate colour till presently it
resembled a close and brilliant network of rainbow tints
intermingled with purest gold. It was as if millions of lines had
been drawn with exquisite fineness and precision so as to cause
intersection or 'reciprocal meeting' at given points of calculation,
and these changed into various dazzling forms too brilliant for even
my dreaming sight to follow. Yet I felt myself compelled to study
one particular section of these lines which shone before me in a
kind of pale brightness, and while I looked it varied to more and
more complex 'moods' of colour and light, if one might so express
it, till, by gradual degrees, it returned again to the simpler
combination.

"Thus are the destinies of human lives woven and interwoven,"--said
the Voice--"From infinite and endless points of light they grow and
part and mingle together, till the destined two are one. Often they
are entangled and disturbed by influences not their own--but from
interference which through weakness or fear they have themselves
permitted. But the tangle is for ever unravelled by Time,--the
parted threads are brought together again in the eternal weaving of
Spirit and Matter. No power, human or divine, can entirely separate
the lives which God has ordained shall come together. Man's
ordainment is not God's ordainment! Wrong threads in the weaving are
broken--no matter how,--no matter when! Love must be tender yet
resolved!--Love must not swerve from its given pledge!--Love must be
All or Nothing!"

The light network of living golden rays still quivered before my
eyes, till all at once they seemed to change to a rippling sea of
fine flame with waves that gently swayed to and fro, tipped with
foam-crests of prismatic hue like broken rainbows. Wave after wave
swept forward and broke in bright amethystine spray close to me
where I knelt, and as I watched this moving mass of radiant colour
in absorbed fascination, one wave, brilliant as the flush of a
summer's dawn, rippled towards me, and then gently retiring, left a
single rose, crimson and fragrant, close within my reach. I stooped
and caught it quickly--surely it was a real rose from some dewy
garden of the earth, and no dream!

"One rose from all the roses in Heaven!" said the mystic Voice, in
tones of enthralling sweetness--"One--fadeless and immortal!--only
one, but sufficient for all! One love from all the million loves of
men and women--one, but enough for Eternity! How long the rose has
awaited its flowering,--how long the love has awaited its
fulfilment--only the recording angels know! Such roses bloom but
once in the wilderness of space and time; such love comes but once
in a Universe of worlds!"

I listened, trembling; I held the rose against my breast between my
clasped hands.

"O Sorrowful Star!" went on the Voice--"What shall become of thee if
thou forsakest the way of Love! O little Sphere of beauty and
delight, why are thy people so blind! O that their eyes were lifted
unto Heaven!--their hearts to joy!--their souls to love! Who is it
that darkens life with sorrow?--who is it that creates the delusion
of death?"

I found my speech suddenly.

"Nay, surely,"--I said, half whispering--"We must all die!"

"Not so!" and the mystic Voice rang out imperatively--"There is no
death! For God is alive!--and from Him Life only can emanate!"

I held my peace, moved by a sudden sweet awe.

"From Eternal Life no death can come,"--continued the Voice--"from
Eternal Love flows Eternal Joy. Change there is,--change there must
be to higher forms and higher planes,--but Life and Love remain as
they are, indestructible--'the same yesterday, to-day, and for
ever!'"

I bent my face over the rose against my breast,--its perfume was
deliciously soft and penetrating, and half unconsciously I kissed
its velvet petals. As I did this a swift and dazzling radiance
poured shower-like through the air, and again I heard mysterious
chords of rhythmic melody rising and falling like distant waves of
the sea. The grave, tender Voice spoke once again:

"Rise and go hence!" it said, in tones of thrilling gentleness--
"Keep the gift God sends thee!--take that which is thine! Meet that
which hath sought thee sorrowing for many centuries! Turn not aside
again, neither by thine own will nor by the will of others, lest old
errors prevail! Pass from vision into waking!--from night to day!--
from seeming death to life!--from loneliness to love!--and keep
within thy heart the message of a Dream!"

The light beating about me like curved wings slowly paled and as
slowly vanished--yet I felt that I must still kneel and wait. This
atmosphere of awe and trembling gradually passed away,--and then,
rising as I thought, and holding the mystic rose with one hand still
against my breast, I turned to feel my way through the darkness
which now encompassed me. As I did this my other hand was caught by
someone in a warm, eager clasp, and I was guided along with an
infinitely tender yet masterful touch which I had no hesitation in
obeying. Step by step I moved with a strange sense of happy reliance
on my unseen companion--darkness or distance had no terrors for me.
And as I Went onward with my hand held firmly in that close yet
gentle grasp, my thoughts became as it were suddenly cleared into a
heaven of comprehension--I looked back upon years of work spread out
like an arid desert uncheered by any spring of sweet water--and I
saw all that my life had lacked--all to which I had unconsciously
pressed forward longingly without any distinct recognition of my own
aims, and only trusting to the infinite powers of God and Nature to
amend my incompleteness by the perfection of the everlasting Whole.
And now--had the answer come? At any rate, I felt I was no longer
alone. Someone who seemed the natural other half of myself was
beside me in the shadows of sleep--I could have spoken, but would
not, for fear of breaking the charm.

And so I went on and on, caring little how long the journey might
be, and even vaguely wishing it might continue for ever,--when
presently a faint light began to peer through the gloom--I saw a
glimmer of blue and grey, then white, then rose-colour--and I awoke-
-to find nothing of a visionary character about me unless perhaps a
shaft of early morning sunshine streaming through the port-hole of
my cabin could be called a reflex of the mystic glory which had
surrounded me in sleep. I then remembered where I was,--yet I was so
convinced of the reality of what I had seen and heard that I looked
about me everywhere for that lovely crimson rose I had brought away
with me from Dreamland--for I could actually feel its stem still
between my fingers. It was not to be seen--but there was delicate
fragrance on the air as if it were blooming near me--a fragrance so
fine that nothing could describe its subtly pervading odour. Every
word spoken by the Voice of my dream was vividly impressed on my
brain, and more vivid still was the recollection of the hand that
had clasped mine and led me out of sleep to waking. I was conscious
of its warmth yet,--and I was troubled, even while I was soothed, by
the memory of the lingering caress with which it had been at last
withdrawn. And I wondered as I lay for a few moments in my bed
inert, and thinking of all that had chanced to me in the night,
whether the long earnest patience of my soul, ever turned as it had
been for years towards the attainment of a love higher than all
earthly attraction, was now about to be recompensed? I knew, and had
always known, that whatsoever we strongly WILL to possess comes to
us in due season; and that steadily resolved prayers are always
granted; the only drawback to the exertion of this power is the
doubt as to whether the thing we desire so ardently will work us
good or ill. For there is no question but that what we seek we shall
find. I had sought long and unwearyingly for the clue to the secret
of life imperishable and love eternal,--was the mystery about to be
unveiled? I could not tell--and I dare not humour the mere thought
too long. Shaking my mind free from the web of marvel and perplexity
in which it had been caught by the visions of the night, I placed
myself in a passively receptive attitude--demanding nothing, fearing
nothing, hoping nothing--but simply content with actual Life,
feeling Life to be the outcome and expression of perfect Love.




IV

A BUNCH OF HEATHER


It was a glorious morning, and so warm that I went up on deck
without any hat or cloak, glad to have the sunlight playing on my
hair and the soft breeze blowing on my face. The scene was perfectly
enchanting; the mountains were bathed in a delicate rose-purple glow
reflected from the past pomp of the sun's rising,--the water was
still as an inland lake, and every mast and spar of the 'Diana' was
reflected in it as in a mirror. A flock of sea-gulls floated round
our vessel, like fairy boats--some of them rising every now and then
with eager cries to wing their graceful flight high through the calm
air, and alight again with a flash of silver pinions on the
translucent blue. While I stood gazing in absorbed delight at the
beauty which everywhere surrounded me, Captain Derrick called to me
from his little bridge, where he stood with folded arms, looking
down.

"Good morning! What do you think of the mystery now?"

"Mystery?" And then his meaning flashed upon me. "Oh, the yacht that
anchored near us last night! Where is she?"

"Just so!" And the captain's look expressed volumes--"Where is she?"

Oddly enough, I had not thought of the stranger vessel till this
moment, though the music sounding from her deck had been the last
thing which had haunted my ears before I had slept--and dreamed! And
now--she was gone! There was not a sign of her anywhere.

I looked up at the captain on his bridge and smiled. "She must have
started very early!" I said.

The captain's fuzzy brows met portentously.

"Ay! Very early! So early that the watch never saw her go. He must
have missed an hour and she must have gained one."

"It's rather strange, isn't it?" I said--"May I come on the bridge?"

"Certainly."

I ran up the little steps and stood beside him, looking out to the
farthest line of sea and sky.

"What do you think about it?" I asked, laughingly, "Was she a real
yacht or a ghost?"

The captain did not smile. His brow was furrowed with perplexed
consideration.

"She wasn't a ghost," he said--"but her ways were ghostly. That is,
she made no noise,--and she sailed without wind. Mr. Harland may say
what he likes,--I stick to that. She had no steam, but she carried
full sail, and she came into the Sound with all her canvas bellying
out as though she were driven by a stormy sou'wester. There's been
no wind all night--yet she's gone, as you see--and not a man on
board heard the weighing of her anchor. When she went and how she
went beats me altogether!"

At that moment we caught sight of a small rowing boat coming out to
us from the shore, pulled by one man, who bent to his oars in a
slow, listless way as though disinclined for the labour.

"Boat ahoy!" shouted the captain.

The man looked up and signalled in answer. A couple of our sailors
went to throw him a rope as he brought his craft alongside. He had
come, so he slowly explained in his soft, slow, almost
unintelligible Highland dialect, with fresh eggs and butter, hoping
to effect a sale. The steward was summoned, and bargaining began. I
listened and looked on, amused and interested, and I presently
suggested to the captain that it might be as well to ask this man if
he too had seen the yacht whose movements appeared so baffling and
inexplicable. The captain at once took the hint.

"Say, Donald," he began, invitingly--"did you see the big yacht that
came in last night about ten o'clock?"

"Ou ay!" was the slow answer--"But my name's no Tonald,--it's just
Jamie."

Captain Derrick laughed jovially.

"Beg pardon! Jamie, then! Did you see the yacht?"

"Ou ay! I've seen her mony a day. She's a real shentleman."

I smiled.

"The yacht?"

Jamie looked up at me.

"Ah, my leddy, ye'll pe makin' a fule o' Jamie wi' a glance like a
sun-sparkle on the sea! Jamie's no fule wi' the right sort, an' the
yacht is a shentleman, an' the shentleman's the yacht, for it's the
shentleman that pays whateffer."

Captain Derrick became keenly interested.

"The gentleman? The owner of the yacht, you mean?"

Jamie nodded--"Just that!"--and proceeded to count out his store of
new-laid eggs with great care as he placed them in the steward's
basket.

"What's his name?"

"Ah, that's ower mickle learnin',"--said Jamie, with a cunning look-
-"I canna say it rightly."

"Can you say it wrongly?" I suggested.

"I wadna!" he replied, and he lifted his eyes, which were dark and
piercing, to my face--"I daurna!"

"Is he such a very terrible gentleman, then?" enquired Captain
Derrick, jocosely.

Jamie's countenance was impenetrable.

"Ye'll pe seein' her for yourself whateffer,"--he said--"Ye'll no
miss her in the waters 'twixt here an' Skye."

He stooped and fumbled in his basket, presently bringing out of it a
small bunch of pink bell-heather,--the delicate waxen type of
blossom which is found only in mossy, marshy places.

"The shentleman wanted as much as I could find o' this,"--he said--
"An' he had it a' but this wee bittie. Will my leddy wear it for
luck?"

I took it from his hand.

"As a gift?" I asked, smiling.

"I wadna tak ony money for't,"--he answered, with a curious
expression of something like fear passing over his brown, weather-
beaten features--"'Tis fairies' making."

I put the little bunch in my dress. As I did so, he doffed his cap.

"Good day t'ye! I'll be no seein' ye this way again!"

"Why not? How do you know?"

"One way in and another way out!" he said, his voice sinking to a
sort of meditative croon--"One road to the West, and the other to
the East!--and round about to the meeting-place! Ou ay! Ye'll mak it
clear sailin'!"

"Without wind, eh?" interposed Captain Derrick--"Like your friend
the 'shentleman'? How does he manage that business?"

Jamie looked round with a frightened air, like an animal scenting
danger,--then, shouldering his empty basket, he gave us a hasty nod
of farewell, and, scrambling down the companion ladder without
another word, was soon in his boat again, rowing away steadily and
never once looking back.

"A wild chap!" said the captain--"Many of these fellows get half
daft, living so much alone in desolate places like Mull, and seeing
nothing all their time but cloud and mountain and sea. He seems to
know something about that yacht, though!"

"That yacht is on your brain, Captain!" I said, merrily--"I feel
quite sorry for you! And yet I daresay if we meet her again the
mystery will turn out to be very simple."

"It will have to be either very simple or very complex!" he
answered, with a laugh--"I shall need a good deal of teaching to
show me how a sailing yacht can make steam speed without wind. Ah,
good morning, sir!"

And we both turned to greet Mr. Harland, who had just come up on
deck. He looked ill and careworn, as though he had slept badly, and
he showed but faint interest in the tale of the strange yacht's
sudden exit.

"It amuses you, doesn't it?"--he said, addressing me with a little
cynical smile wrinkling up his forehead and eyes--"Anything that
cannot be at once explained is always interesting and delightful to
a woman! That is why spiritualistic 'mediums' make money. They do
clever tricks which cannot be explained, hence their success with
the credulous."

"Quite so"--I replied--"but just allow me to say that I am no
believer in 'mediums.'"

"True,--I forgot!" He rubbed his hand wearily over his brows--then
asked--"Did you sleep well?"

"Splendidly! And I must really thank you for my lovely rooms,--they
are almost too luxurious! They are fit for a princess."

"Why a princess?" he queried, ironically--"Princesses are not always
agreeable personages. I know one or two,--fat, ugly and stupid. Some
of them are dirty in their persons and in their habits. There are
certain 'princesses' in Europe who ought to be washed and
disinfected before being given any rooms anywhere!"

I laughed.

"Oh, you are very bitter!" I said.

"Not at all. I like accuracy. 'Princess' to the ingenuous mind
suggests a fairy tale. I have not an ingenuous mind. I know that the
princesses of the fairy tales do not exist,--unless you are one."

"Me!" I exclaimed, in amazement--"I'm very far from that--"

"Well, you are a dreamer!" he said, and resting his arms on the deck
rail he looked away from me down into the sunlit sea--"You do not
live here in this world with us--you think you do,--and yet in your
own mind you know you do not. You dream--and your life is that of
vision simply. I'm not sure that I should like to see you wake. For
as long as you can dream you will believe in the fairy tale;--the
'princess' of Hans Andersen and the Brothers Grimm holds good--and
that is why you should have pretty things about you,--music, roses
and the like trifles,--to keep up the delicate delusion."

I was surprised and just a little vexed at his way of talking. Why,
even with the underlying flattery of his words, should he call me a
dreamer? I had worked for my own living as practically as himself in
the world, and if not with such financially successful results, only
because my aims had never been mere money-spinning. He had attained
enormous wealth,--I a modest competence,--he was old and I was
young,--he was ill and miserable,--I was well and happy,--which of
us was the 'dreamer'? My thoughts were busy with this question, and
he saw it.

"Don't perplex yourself,"--he said,--"and don't be offended with me
for my frankness. My view of life is not yours,--nor are we ever
likely to see things from the same standpoint. Yours is the more
enviable condition. You are looking well,--you feel well--you are
well! Health is the best of all things." He paused, and lifting his
eyes from the contemplation of the water, regarded me fixedly.
"That's a lovely bit of bell-heather you're wearing! It glows like
fiery topaz."

I explained how it had been given to me.

"Why, then, you've already established a connection with the strange
yacht!" he said, laughing--"The owner, according to your Highland
fellow, has the same blossoms on board,--probably gathered from the
same morass!--surely this is quite romantic and exciting!"

And at breakfast, when Dr. Brayle and Mr. Swinton appeared, they all
made conversation on the subject of my bunch of heather, till I got
rather tired of it, and was half inclined to take it off and throw
it away. Yet somehow I could not do this. Glancing at my own
reflection in a mirror, I saw what a brilliant yet dainty touch of
colour it gave to the plain white serge of my yachting dress,--it
was a pretty contrast, and I left it alone.

Miss Catherine did not get up to breakfast, but she sent for me
afterwards and asked if I would mind sitting with her for a while. I
did mind in a way,--for the day was fair and fine,--the 'Diana' was
preparing to pursue her course,--and it was far pleasanter to be on
deck in the fresh air than in Miss Catherine's state-room, which,
though quite spacious for a yacht's accommodation, looked rather
dreary, having no carpet on the floor, no curtains to the bed, and
no little graces of adornment anywhere,--nothing but a few shelves
against the wall on which were ranged some blue and black medicine
bottles, relieved by a small array of pill-boxes. But I felt sorry
for the poor woman who had elected to make her life a martyrdom to
nerves, and real or imaginary aches and pains, so I went to her,
determined to do what I could to cheer and rouse her from her
condition of chronic depression. Directly I entered her cabin she
said:

"Where did you get that bright bit of heather?"

I told her the whole story, to which she listened with more patience
than she usually showed for any talk in which she had not first
share.

"It's really quite interesting!" she said, with a reluctant smile--
"I suppose it was the strange yacht that had the music on board last
night. It kept me awake. I thought it was some tiresome person out
in a boat with a gramophone."

I laughed.

"Oh, Miss Harland!" I exclaimed--"Surely you could not have thought
it a gramophone! Such music! It was perfectly exquisite!"

"Was it?" And she drew the ugly grey woollen shawl in which she was
wrapped closer about her sallow throat as she sat up in her bed and
looked at me--"Well, it may have been, to you,--you seem to find
delight in everything,--I'm sure I don't know why! Of course it's
very nice to have such a happy disposition--but really that music
teased me dreadfully. Such a bore having music when you want to go
to sleep."

I was silent, and having a piece of embroidery to occupy my hands I
began to work at it.

"I hope you're quite comfortable on board,"--she resumed, presently-
-"Have you all you want in your rooms?"

I assured her that everything was perfect.

She sighed.

"I wish I could say the same!" she said--"I really hate yachting,
but father likes it, so I must sacrifice myself." Here she sighed
again. I saw she was really convinced that she was immolating
herself on the altar of filial obedience. "You know he is very
ill,"--she went on--"and that he cannot live long?"

"He told me something about it,"--I answered--"and I said then, as I
say now, that the doctors may be wrong."

"Oh no, they cannot be wrong in his case," she declared, shaking her
head dismally--"They know the symptoms, and they can only avert the
end for a time. I'm very thankful Dr. Brayle was able to come with
us on this trip."

"I suppose he is paid a good deal for his services?" I said.

"Eight hundred guineas"--she answered--"But, you see, he has to
leave his patients in London, and find another man to attend to them
during his absence. He is so very clever and so much sought after--I
don't know what I should do without him, I'm sure!"

"Has he any special treatment for you?" I asked.

"Oh yes,--he gives me electricity. He has a wonderful battery--he
has got it fitted up here in the next cabin--and while I hold two
handles he turns it on and it runs all over me. I feel always better
for the moment--but the effect soon passes."

I looked at her with a smile.

"I should think so! Dear Miss Harland, do you really believe in that
way of administering electricity?"

"Of course I do!" she answered--"You see, it's all a question of
what they call bacteriology nowadays. Medicine is no use unless it
can kill the microbes that are eating us up inside and out. And
there's scarcely any drug that can do that. Electricity is the only
remedy. It gives the little brutes a shock;"--and the poor lady
laughed weakly--"and it kills some, but not all. It's a dreadful
scheme of creation, don't you think, to make human beings no better
than happy hunting grounds for invisible creatures to feed upon?"

"It depends on what view you take of it,"--I said, laying down my
work and trying to fix her attention, a matter which was always
difficult--"We human beings are composed of good and evil particles.
If the good are encouraged, they drive out the evil,--if the evil,
they drive out the good. It's the same with the body as the soul,--
if we encourage the health-working 'microbes' as you call them, they
will drive out disease from the human organism altogether."

She sank back on her pillow wearily.

"We can't do it,"--she said--"All the chances are against us. What's
the use of our trying to encourage 'health-working microbes'? The
disease-working ones have got the upper hand. Just think!--our
parents, grandparents and great-grandparents are to blame for half
our evils. Their diseases become ours in various new forms. It's
cruel,--horrible! How anyone can believe that a God of Love created
such a frightful scheme passes my comprehension! The whole thing is
a mere business of eating to be eaten!"

She looked so wan and wild that I pitied her greatly.

"Surely that is not what you think at the bottom of your heart?" I
said, gently--"I should be very sorry for you if I thought you
really meant what you say."

"Well, you may be as sorry for me as you like"--and the poor lady
blinked away tears from her eyes--"I need someone to be sorry for
me! I tell you my life is a perfect torture. Every day I wonder how
long I can bear it! I have such dreadful thoughts! I picture the
horrible things that are happening to different people all over the
world, nobody helping them or caring for them, and I almost feel as
if I must scream for mercy. It wouldn't be any use screaming,--but
the scream is in my soul all the same. People in prisons, people in
shipwrecks, people dying by inches in hospitals, no good in their
lives and no hope--and not a sign of comfort from the God whom the
Churches praise! It's awful! I don't see how anybody can do anything
or be ambitious for anything--it's all mere waste of energy. One of
the reasons that made me so anxious to have you come on this trip
with us is that you always seem contented and happy,--and I want to
know why? It's a question of temperament, I suppose--but do tell me
why!"

She stretched out her hand and touched mine appealingly. I took her
worn and wasted fingers in my own and pressed them sympathetically.

"My dear Miss Harland,"--I began.

"Oh, call me Catherine"--she interrupted--"I'm so tired of being
Miss Harland!"

"Well, Catherine, then,"--I said, smiling a little--"Surely you know
why I am contented and happy?"

"No, I do not,"--she said, with quick, almost querulous? eagerness--
"I don't understand it at all. You have none of the things that
please women. You don't seem to care about dress though you are
always well-gowned--you don't go to balls or theatres or race-
meetings,--you are a general favourite, yet you avoid society,--
you've never troubled yourself to take your chances of marriage,--
and so far as I know or have heard tell about you, you haven't even
a lover!"

My cheeks grew suddenly warm. A curious resentment awoke in me at
her words--had I indeed no lover? Surely I had!--one that I knew
well and had known for a long time,--one for whom I had guarded my
life sacredly as belonging to another as well as to myself,--a lover
who loved me beyond all power of human expression,--here the rush of
strange and inexplicable emotion in me was hurled back on my mind
with a shock of mingled terror and surprise from a dead wall of
stony fact,--it was true, of course, and Catherine Harland was
right--I had no lover. No man had ever loved me well enough to be
called by such a name. The flush cooled off my face,--the hurry of
my thoughts slackened,--I took up my embroidery and began to work at
it again.

"That is so, isn't it?" persisted Miss Harland--"Though you blush
and grow pale as if there was someone in the background."

I met her inquisitive glance and smiled.

"There is no one,"--I said--"There never has been anyone." I paused;
I could almost feel the warmth of the strong hand that had held mine
in my dream of the past night. It was mere fancy, and I went on--"I
should not care for what modern men and women call love. It seems
very unsatisfactory."

She sighed.

"It is frequently very selfish,"--she said--"I want to tell you my
love-story--may I?"

"Why, of course!" I answered, a little wonderingly, for I had not
thought she had a love-story to tell.

"It's very brief,"--she said, and her lip quivered--"There was a man
who used to visit our house very often when I first came out,--he
made me believe he was very fond of me. I was more than fond of him-
-I almost worshipped him. He was all the world to me, and though
father did not like him very much he wished me to be happy, so we
were engaged. That was the time of my life--the only time I ever
knew what happiness was. One evening, just about three months before
we were to be married, we were together at a party in the house of
one of our mutual friends, and I heard him talking rather loudly in
a room where he and two or three other men had gone to smoke. He
said something that made me stand still and wonder whether I was mad
or dreaming. 'Pity me when I'm married to Catherine Harland!' Pity
him? I listened,--I knew it was wrong to listen, but I could not
help myself. 'Well, you'll get enough cash with her to set you all
right in the world, anyhow,'--said another man, 'You can put up with
a plain wife for the sake of a pretty fortune.' Then he,--my love!--
spoke again--'Oh, I shall make the best of it,' he said--'I must
have money somehow, and this is the easiest way. There's one good
thing about modern life,--husbands and wives don't hunt in couples
as they used to do, so when once the knot is tied I shall shift my
matrimonial burden off my shoulders as much as I can. She'll amuse
herself with her clothes and the household,--and she's fond of me,
so I shall always have my own way. But it's an awful martyrdom to
have to marry one woman on account of empty pockets when you're in
love with another.' I heard,--and then--I don't know what happened."

Her eyes stared at me so pitifully that I was full of sorrow for
her.

"Oh, you poor Catherine!" I said, and taking her hand, I kissed it
gently. The tears in her eyes brimmed over.

"They found me lying on the floor insensible,"--she went on,
tremulously--"And I was very ill for a long time afterwards. People
could not understand it when I broke off my engagement. I told
nobody why--except HIM. He seemed sorry and a little ashamed,--but I
think he was more vexed at losing my fortune than anything else. I
said to him that I had never thought about being plain,--that the
idea of his loving me had made me feel beautiful. That was true!--my
dear, I almost believe I should have grown into beauty if I had been
sure of his love."

I understood that; she was perfectly right in what to the entirely
commonplace person would seem a fanciful theory. Love makes all
things fair, and anyone who is conscious of being tenderly loved
grows lovely, as a rose that is conscious of the sun grows into form
and colour.

"Well, it was all over then,"--she ended, with a sigh, "I never was
quite myself again--I think my nerves got a sort of shock such as
the great novelist, Charles Dickens had when he was in the railway
accident--you remember the tale in Forster's 'Life'? How the
carriage hung over the edge of an embankment but did not actually
fall,--and Dickens was clinging on to it all the time. He never got
over it, and it was the remote cause of his death five years later.
Now I have felt just like that,--my life has hung over a sort of
chasm ever since I lost my love, and I only cling on."

"But surely,"--I ventured to say--"surely there are other things to
live for than just the memory of one man's love which was not love
at all! You seem to think there was some cruelty or unhappiness in
the chance that separated you from him,--but really it was a special
mercy and favour of God--only you have taken it in the wrong way."

"I have taken it in the only possible way,"--she said--"With
resignation."

"Oh, do you call it resignation?" I exclaimed--"To make a misery of
what should have been a gladness? Think of the years and years of
wretchedness you might have passed with a man who was a merely
selfish fortune-hunter! You would have had to see him grow colder
and more callous every day--your heart would have been torn, your
spirit broken--and God spared you all this by giving you your chance
of freedom! Such a chance! You might have made much of it, if you
had only chosen!"

She looked at me, but did not speak.

"Love comes to us in a million beautiful ways,"--I went on, heedless
of how she might take my words--"The ordinary love,--or, I would
say, the ordinary mating and marriage is only ONE way. You cannot
live in the world without being loved--if you love!"

She moved on her pillows restlessly.

"I can't see what you mean,"--she said--"How can I love? I have
nothing to love!"

"But do you not see that you are shutting yourself out from love?" I
said--"You will not have it! You bar its approach. You encourage
your sad and morbid fancies, and think of illness when you might
just as well think of health. Oh, I know you will say I am 'up in
the air' as your father expresses it,--but it's true all the same
that if you love everything in Nature--yes, everything!--sunshine,
air, cloud, rain, trees, birds, blossom,--they will love you in
return and give you some of their life and strength and beauty."

She smiled,--a very bitter little smile.

"You talk like a poet,"--she said--"And of all things in the world I
hate poetry! There!--don't think me cross! Go along and be happy in
your own strange fanciful way! I cannot be other than I am,--Dr.
Brayle will tell you that I'm not strong enough to share in other
people's lives and aims and pleasures,--I must always consider
myself."

"Dr. Brayle tells you that?" I queried--"To consider yourself?"

"Of course he does. If I had not considered myself every hour and
every day, I should have been dead long ago. I have to consider
everything I eat and drink lest it should make me ill."

I rose from my seat beside her.

"I wish I could cure you!" I murmured.

"My dear girl, if you could, you would, I am sure,"--she answered--
"You are very kind-hearted. It has done me good to talk to you and
tell you all my sad little history. I shall get up presently and
have my electricity and feel quite bright for a time. But as for a
cure, you might as well try to cure my father."

"None are cured of any ailment unless they resolve to help along the
cure themselves," I said.

She gave a weary little laugh.

"Ah, that's one of your pet theories, but it's no use to me! I'm
past all helping of myself, so you may give me up as a bad job!"

"But you asked me," I went on--"did you not, to tell you why it is
that I am contented and happy? Do you really want to know?"

A vague distrust crept into her faded eyes.

"Not if it's a theory!" she said--"I should not have the brain or
the patience to think it out."

I laughed.

"It's not a theory, it's a truth"--I answered--"But truth is
sometimes more difficult than theory."

She looked at me half in wonder, half in appeal.

"Well, what is it?"

"Just this"--and I knelt beside her for a moment holding her hand--
"I KNOW that there are no external surroundings which we do not make
for ourselves, and that our troubles are born of our own wrong
thinking, and are not sent from God. I train my Soul to be calm,--
and my body obeys my Soul. That's all!"

Her fingers closed on mine nervously.

"But what's the use of telling me this?" she half whispered--"I
don't believe in God or the Soul!"

I rose from my kneeling attitude.

"Poor Catherine!" I said--"Then indeed it is no use telling you
anything! You are in darkness instead of daylight, and no one can
make you see. Oh, what can I do to help you?"

"Nothing,"--she answered--"My faith--it was never very much,--was
taken from me altogether when I was quite young. Father made it seem
absurd. He's a clever man, you know--and in a few words he makes out
religion to be utter nonsense."

"I understand!"

And indeed I did entirely understand. Her father was one of a
rapidly increasing class of men who are a danger to the community,--
a cold, cynical shatterer of every noble ideal,--a sneerer at
patriotism and honour,--a deliberate iconoclast of the most callous
and remorseless type. That he had good points in his character was
not to be denied,--a murderer may have these. But to be in his
company for very long was to feel that there is no good in anything-
-that life is a mistake of Nature, and death a fortunate ending of
the blunder--that God is a delusion and the 'Soul' a mere expression
signifying certain intelligent movements of the brain only.

I stood silently thinking these things, while she watched me rather
wistfully. Presently she said:

"Are you going on deck now?"

"Yes."

"I'll join you all at luncheon. Don't lose that bit of heather in
your dress,--it's really quite brilliant--like a jewel."

I hesitated a moment.

"You're not vexed with me for speaking as I have done?" I asked her.

"Vexed? No, indeed! I love to hear you and see you defending your
own fairy ground! For it IS like a fairy tale, you know--all that
YOU believe!"

"It has practical results, anyway!"--I answered--"You must admit
that."

"Yes--I know,--and it's just what I can't understand. We'll have
another talk about it some day. Would you tell Dr. Brayle that I
shall be ready for him in ten minutes?"

I assented, and left her. I made for the deck directly, the air
meeting me with a rush of salty softness as I ran up the saloon
stairway. What a glorious day it was! Sky, sea and mountains were
bathed in brilliant sunshine; the 'Diana' was cutting her path
swiftly through waters which marked her course on either side by a
streak of white foam. I mentally contrasted the loveliness of the
scene around me with the stuffy cabin I had just left, and seeing
Dr. Brayle smoking comfortably in a long reclining chair and reading
a paper I went up to him and touched him on the shoulder.

"Your patient wants you in ten minutes,"--I said.

He rose to his feet at once, courteously offering me a chair, which
I declined, and drew his cigar from his mouth.

"I have two patients on board,"--he answered, smiling--"Which one?"

"The one who is your patient from choice, not necessity,"--I
replied, coolly.

"My dear lady!" His eyes blinked at me with a furtive astonishment--
"If you were not so charming I should say you were--well!--SHALL I
say it?--a trifle opinionated!"

I laughed.

"Granted!" I said--"If it is opinionated to be honest I plead
guilty! Miss Harland is as well as you or I,--she's only morbid."

"True!--but morbidness is a form of illness,--a malady of the
nerves--"

I laughed again, much to his visible annoyance.

"Curable by outward applications of electricity?" I queried--"When
the mischief is in the mind? But there!--I mustn't interfere, I
suppose! Nevertheless you keep Miss Harland ill when she might be
quite well."

A disagreeable line furrowed the corners of his mouth.

"You think so? Among your many accomplishments do you count the art
of medicine?"

I met his shifty brown eyes, and he dropped them quickly.

"I know nothing about it,"--I answered--"Except this--that the cure
of any mind trouble must come from within--not from without. And I'm
not a Christian Scientist either?"

He smiled cynically. "Really not? I should have thought you were!"

"You would make a grave error if you thought so," I responded,
curtly.

A keen and watchful interest flashed over his dark face.

"I should very much like to know what your theories are"--he said,
suddenly--"You interest me greatly."

"I'm sure I do!" I answered, smiling.

He looked me up and down for a moment in perplexity--then shrugged
his shoulders.

"You are a strange creature!" he said--"I cannot make you out. If I
were asked to give a 'professional' opinion of you I should say you
were very neurotic and highly-strung, and given over to self-
delusions."

"Thanks!"--and I made him a demure little curtsy. "I look it, don't
I?"

"No--you don't look it; but looks are deceptive."

"There I agree with you,"--I said--"But one has to go by them
sometimes. If I am 'neurotic,' my looks do not pity me, and my
condition of health leaves nothing to desire."

His brows met in a slight frown. He glanced at his watch.

"I must go,"--he said--"Miss Harland will be waiting."

"And the electricity will get cold!" I added, gaily. "See if you can
feel my 'neurotic' pulse!"

He took the hand I extended--and remained quite still. Conscious of
the secret force I had within myself I resolved to try if I could
use it upon him in such a way as to keep him a prisoner till I chose
to let him go. I watched him till his eyes began to look vague and a
kind of fixity settled on his features,--he was perfectly
unconscious that I held him at my pleasure,--and presently,
satisfied with my experiment, I relaxed the spell and withdrew my
hand.

"Quite regular, isn't it?" I said, carelessly.

He started as if roused from a sleep, but replied quickly:

"Yes--oh yes--perfectly!--I had almost forgotten what I was doing. I
was thinking of something else. Miss Harland--"

"Yes, Miss Harland is ready for you by this time"--and I smiled.
"You must tell her I detained you."

He nodded in a more or less embarrassed manner, and turning away
from me, went rather slowly down the saloon stairs.

I gave a sigh of relief when he was gone. I had from the first
moment of our meeting recognised in him a mental organisation which
in its godless materialism and indifference to consequences, was
opposed to every healthful influence that might be brought to bear
on his patients for their well-being, whatever his pretensions to
medical skill might be. It was to his advantage to show them the
worst side of a disease in order to accentuate his own cleverness in
dealing with it,--it served his purpose to pamper their darkest
imaginings, play with their whims and humour their caprices,--I saw
all this and understood it. And I was glad that so far as I might be
concerned, I had the power to master him.




V

AN UNEXPECTED MEETING


To spend a few days on board a yacht with the same companions is a
very good test of the value of sympathetic vibration in human
associations. I found it so. I might as well have been quite alone
on the 'Diana' as with Morton Harland and his daughter, though they
were always uniformly kind to me and thoughtful of my comfort. But
between us there was 'a great gulf fixed,' though every now and
again Catherine Harland made feeble and pathetic efforts to cross
that gulf and reach me where I stood on the other side. But her
strength was not equal to the task,--her will-power was sapped at
its root, and every day she allowed herself to become more and more
pliantly the prey of Dr. Brayle, who, with a subconscious feeling
that I knew him to be a mere medical charlatan, had naturally warned
her against me as an imaginative theorist without any foundation of
belief in my own theories. I therefore shut myself within a fortress
of reserve, and declined to discuss any point of either religion or
science with those for whom the one was a farce and the other mere
materialism. At all times when we were together I kept the
conversation deliberately down to commonplaces which were safe, if
dull,--and it amused me not a little to see that at this course of
action on my part Mr. Harland was first surprised, then disappointed
and finally bored. And I was glad. That I should bore him as much as
he bored me was the happy consummation of my immediate desires. I
talked as all conventional women talk, of the weather, of our
minimum and maximum speed, of the newspaper 'sensations' and
vulgarities that were served up to us whenever we called at a port
for the mails,--of the fish that frequented such and such waters, of
sport, of this and that millionaire whose highland castle or
shooting-box was crammed with the 'elite' whose delight is to kill
innocent birds and animals,--of the latest fool-flyers in
aeroplanes,--in short, no fashionable jabberer of social inanities
could have beaten me in what average persons call 'common-sense
talk,'--talk which resulted after a while in the usual vagueness of
attention accompanied by smothered yawning. I was resolved not to
lift the line of thought 'up in the air' in the manner whereof I had
often been accused, but to keep it level with the ground. So that
when we left Tobermory, where we had anchored for a couple of days,
the limits of the yacht were becoming rather cramped and narrow for
our differing minds, and a monotony was beginning to set in that
threatened to be dangerous, if not unbearable. As the 'Diana'
steamed along through the drowsy misty light of the summer
afternoon, past the jagged coast of the mainland, I sat quite by
myself on deck, watching the creeping purple haze that partially
veiled the mountains of Ardnamurchan and Moidart, and I began to
wonder whether after all it might not be better to write to my
friend Francesca and tell her that her prophecies had already come
true,--that I was beginning to be weary of a holiday passed in an
atmosphere bereft of all joyousness, and that she must expect me in
Inverness-shire at once. And yet I was reluctant to end my trip with
the Harlands too soon. There was a secret wish in my heart which I
hardly breathed to myself,--a wish that I might again see the
strange vessel that had appeared and disappeared so suddenly, and
make the acquaintance of its owner. It would surely be an
interesting break in the present condition of things, to say the
least of it. I did not know then (though I know now) why my mind so
persistently busied itself with the fancied personality of the
unknown possessor of the mysterious craft which, as Captain Derrick
said, 'sailed without wind,' but I found myself always thinking
about him and trying to picture his face and form.

I took myself sharply to task for what I considered a foolish mental
attitude,--but do what I would, the attitude remained unchanged. It
was helped, perhaps, in a trifling way by the apparently fadeless
quality of the pink bell-heather which had been given me by the
weird-looking Highland fellow who called himself Jamie, for though
three or four days had now passed since I first wore it, it showed
no signs of withering. As a rule the delicate waxen bells of this
plant turn yellow a few hours after they are plucked,--but my little
bunch was as brilliantly fresh as ever. I kept it in a glass without
water on the table in my sitting-room and it looked always the same.
I was questioning myself as to what I should really do if my
surroundings remained as hopelessly inert and uninteresting as they
were at present,--go on with the 'Diana' for a while longer on the
chance of seeing the strange yacht again--or make up my mind to get
put out at some point from which I could reach Inverness easily,
when Mr. Harland came up suddenly behind my chair and laid his hand
on my shoulder.

"Are you in dreamland?" he enquired--and I thought his voice sounded
rather weak and dispirited--"There's a wonderful light on those
hills just now."

I raised my eyes and saw the purple shadows being cloven and
scattered one after another, by long rays of late sunshine that
poured like golden wine through the dividing wreaths of vapour,--
above, the sky was pure turquoise blue, melting into pale opal and
emerald near the line of the grey sea which showed little flecks of
white foam under the freshening breeze. Bringing my gaze down from
the dazzling radiance of the heavens, I turned towards Mr. Harland
and was startled and shocked to see the drawn and livid pallor of
his face and the anguish of his expression.

"You are ill!" I exclaimed, and springing up in haste I offered him
my chair--"Do sit down!"

He made a mute gesture of denial, and with slow difficulty drew
another chair up beside mine, and dropped into it with an air of
heavy weariness.

"I am not ill now,"--he said--"A little while ago I was very ill. I
was in pain--horrible pain! Brayle did what he could for me--it was
not much. He says I must expect to suffer now and again--until--
until the end."

Impulsively I laid my hand on his.

"I am very sorry!" I said, gently--"I wish I could be of some use to
you!"

He looked at me with a curious wistfulness.

"You could, no doubt, if I believed as you do,"--he replied, and
then was silent for a moment. Presently he spoke again.

"Do you know I am rather disappointed in you?"

"Are you?" And I smiled a little--"Why?"

He did not answer at once. He seemed absorbed in troubled musings.
When he resumed, it was in a low, meditative tone, almost as if he
were speaking to himself.

"When I first met you--you remember?--at one of those social
'crushes' which make the London season so infinitely tedious,--I was
told you were gifted with unusual psychic power, and that you had in
yourself the secret of an abounding exhaustless vitality. I repeat
the words--an abounding exhaustless vitality. This interested me,
because I know that our modern men and women are mostly only half
alive. I heard of you that it did people good to be in your
company,--that your influence upon them was remarkable, and that
there was some unknown form of occult, or psychic science to which
you had devoted years of study, with the result that you stood, as
it were, apart from the world though in the world. This, I say, is
what I heard--"

"But you did not believe it,"--I interposed.

"Why do you say that?" he asked, quickly.

"Because I know you could not believe it,"--I answered--"It would be
impossible for you."

A gleam of satire flashed in his sunken eyes.

"Well, you are right there! I did not believe it. But I expected--"

"I know!" And I laughed--"You expected what is called a 'singular'
woman--one who makes herself 'singular,' adopts a 'singular' pose,
and is altogether removed from ordinary humanity. And of course you
are disappointed. I am not at all a type of the veiled priestess."

"It is not that,"--he said, with a little vexation--"When I saw you
I recognised you to be a very transparent creature, devoted to
innocent dreams which are not life. But that secret which you are
reported to possess--the secret of wonderful abounding exhaustless
vitality--how does it happen that you have it? I myself see that
force expressed in your very glance and gesture, and what puzzles me
is that it is not an animal vitality; it is something else."

I was silent.

"You have not a robust physique,"--he went on--"Yet you are more
full of the spirit of life than men and women twice as strong as you
are. You are a feminine thing, too,--and that goes against you. But
one can see in you a worker--you evidently enjoy the exercise of the
accomplishments you possess--and nothing comes amiss to you. I
wonder how you manage it? When you joined us on this trip a few days
ago, you brought a kind of atmosphere with you that was almost
buoyant, and now I am disappointed, because you seem to have
enclosed yourself within it, and to have left us out!"

"Have you not left yourselves out?" I queried, gently. "I,
personally, have really nothing to do with it. Just remember that
when we have talked on any subject above the line of the general and
commonplace your sole object has been to 'draw' me for the amusement
of yourself and Dr. Brayle--"

"Ah, you saw that, did you?" he interrupted, with a faint smile.

"Naturally! Had you believed half you say you were told of me, you
would have known I must have seen it. Can you wonder that I refuse
to be 'drawn'?"

He looked at me with an odd expression of mingled surprise and
annoyance, and I met his gaze fully and frankly. His eyes shifted
uneasily away from mine.

"One may feel a pardonable curiosity," he said, "And a desire to
know--"

"To know what?" I asked, with some warmth--"How can you obtain what
you are secretly craving for, if you persist in denying what is
true? You are afraid of death--yet you invite it by ignoring the
source of life! The curtain is down,--you are outside eternal
realities altogether in a chaos of your own voluntary creation!"

I spoke with some passion, and he heard me patiently.

"Let us try to understand each other," he said, after a pause--
"though it will be difficult. You speak of 'eternal realities.' To
me there are none, save the constant scattering and re-uniting of
atoms. These, so far as we know of the extraordinary (and to me
quite unintelligent) plan of the Universe, are for ever shifting and
changing into various forms and clusters of forms, such as solar
systems, planets, comets, star-dust and the like. Our present view
of them is chiefly based on the researches of Larmor and Thomson of
Cambridge. From them and other scientists we learn that electricity
exists in small particles which we can in a manner see in the
'cathode' rays,--and these particles are called 'electrons.' These
compose 'atoms of matter.' Well!--there are a trillion of atoms in
each granule of dust,--while electrons are so much smaller, that a
hundred thousand of them can lie in the diameter of an atom. I know
all this,--but I do not know why the atoms or electrons should exist
at all, nor what cause there should be for their constant and often
violent state of movement. They apparently always HAVE BEEN, and
always WILL be,--therefore they are all that can be called 'eternal
realities.' Sir Norman Lockyer tells us that the matter of the
Universe is undergoing a continuous process of evolution--but even
if it is so, what is that to me individually? It neither helps nor
consoles me for being one infinitesimal spark in the general
conflagration. Now you believe--"

"In the Force that is BEHIND your system of electrons and atoms"--I
said--"For by whatever means or substances the Universe is composed,
a mighty Intelligence governs it--and I look to the Cause more than
the Effect. For even I am a part of the whole,--I belong to the
source of the stream as much as to the stream itself. An abstract,
lifeless principle without will or intention or intelligence could
not have evolved the splendours of Nature or the intellectual
capabilities of man--it could not have given rise to what was not in
itself."

He fixed his eyes steadily upon me.

"That last sentence is sound argument," he said, as though
reluctantly admitting the obvious,--"And I suppose I am to presume
that 'Itself' is the well-spring from which you draw, or imagine you
draw, your psychic force?"

"If I have any psychic force at all," I responded,--"where do you
suppose it should come from but that which gives vitality to all
animate Nature? I cannot understand why you blind yourself to the
open and visible fact of a Divine Intelligence working in and
through all things. If you could but acknowledge it and set yourself
in tune with it you would find life a new and far more dominant joy
than it is to you now. I firmly believe that your very illness has
arisen from your determined attitude of unbelief."

"That's what a Christian Scientist would say," he answered, with a
touch of scorn,--"I begin to think Dr. Brayle is right in his
estimate of you."

I held my peace.

"Have you no curiosity?" he demanded--"Don't you want to know his
opinion?"

"No,"--and I smiled--"My dear Mr. Harland, with all your experience
of the world, has it never occurred to you that there are some
people whose opinions don't matter?"

"Brayle is a clever man,"--he said, somewhat testily, "And you are
merely an imaginative woman."

"Then why do you trouble about me?" I asked him, quickly--"Why do
you want to find out that something in me which baffles both Dr.
Brayle and yourself?"

It was now his turn to be silent, and he remained so for some time,
his eyes fixed on the shadowing heavens. The waves were roughening
slightly and a swell from the Atlantic lifted the 'Diana' curtsying
over their foam-flecked crests as she ploughed her way swiftly
along. Presently he turned to me with a smile.

"Let us strike a truce!"--he said--"I promise not to try and 'draw'
you any more! But please do not isolate yourself from us,--try to
feel that we are your friends. I want you to enjoy this trip if
possible,--but I fear that we are proving rather dull company for
you. We are making for Skye at good speed and shall probably anchor
in Loch Scavaig to-night. To-morrow we might land and do the
excursion to Loch Coruisk if you care for that, though Catherine is
not a good walker."

I felt rather remorseful as he said these words in a kindly tone.
Yet I knew very well that, notwithstanding all the strenuous efforts
which might be made by the rules of conventional courtesy, it would
be impossible for me to feel quite at home in the surroundings which
he had created for himself. I inwardly resolved, however, to make
the best of it and to try and steer clear of any possibilities or
incidents which might tend to draw the line of demarcation too
strongly between us. Some instinct told me that present conditions
were not to remain as they were, so I answered my host gently and
assured him of my entire willingness to fall in with any of his
plans. Our conversation then gradually drifted into ordinary topics
till towards sunset, when I went down to my cabin to dress for
dinner. I had a fancy to wear the bunch of pink bell-heather that
still kept its fresh and waxen-looking delicacy of bloom, and this,
fastened in the lace of my white gown, was my only adornment.

That night there was a distinct attempt on everybody's part to make
things sociable and pleasant. Catherine Harland was, for once, quite
cheerful and chatty, and proposed that as there was a lovely
moonlight, we should all go after dinner into the deck saloon, where
there was a piano, and that I should sing for them. I was rather
surprised at this suggestion, as she was not fond of music.
Nevertheless, there had been such an evident wish shown by her and
her father to lighten the monotony which had been creeping like a
mental fog over us all that I readily agreed to anything which might
perhaps for the moment give them pleasure.

We went up on deck accordingly, and on arriving there were all
smitten into awed silence by the wonderful beauty of the scene. We
were anchored in Loch Scavaig--and the light of the moon fell with a
weird splendour on the gloom of the surrounding hills, a pale beam
touching the summits here and there and deepening the solemn effect
of the lake and the magnificent forms of its sentinel mountains. A
low murmur of hidden streams sounded on the deep stillness and
enhanced the fascination of the surrounding landscape, which was
more like the landscape of a dream than a reality. The deep breadths
of dense darkness lying lost among the cavernous slopes of the hills
were broken at intervals by strange rifts of light arising as it
were from the palpitating water, which now and again showed gleams
of pale emerald and gold phosphorescence,--the stars looked large
and white like straying bits of the moon, and the mysterious
'swishing' of slow ripples heaving against the sides of the yacht
suggested the whisperings of uncanny spirits. We stood in a silent
group, entranced by the grandeur of the night and by our own
loneliness in the midst of it, for there was no sign of a
fisherman's hut or boat moored to the shore, or anything which could
give us a sense of human companionship. A curious feeling of
disappointment suddenly came over me,--I lifted my eyes to the vast
dark sky with a kind of mute appeal--and moon and stars appeared to
float up there like ships in a deep sea,--I had expected something
more in this strange, almost spectral-looking landscape, and yet I
knew not why I should expect anything. Beautiful as the whole scene
was, and fully as I recognised its beauty, an overpowering
depression suddenly gripped me as with a cold hand,--there was a
dreary emptiness in this majestic solitude that seemed to crush my
spirit utterly.

I moved a little away from my companions, and leaned over the deck
rail, looking far into the black shadows of the shore, defined more
deeply by the contrasting brilliance of the moon, and my thoughts
flew with undesired swiftness to the darkest line of life's horizon-
-I had for the moment lost the sense of joy. How wretched all we
human creatures are!--I said to my inner self,--what hope after all
is there for us, imprisoned in a world which has no pity for us
whatever may be our fate,--a world that goes on in precisely the
same fashion whether we live or die, work or are idle? These tragic
hills, this cold lake, this white moon, were the same when Caesar
lived, and would still be the same when we who gazed upon them now
were all gone into the Unknown. It seemed difficult to try and
realise this obvious fact--so difficult as to be almost unnatural.
Supposing that any towns or villages had ever existed on this
desolate shore, they had proved useless against the devouring forces
of Nature,--just as the splendid buried cities of South America had
proved useless in all their magnificence,--useless as the 'Golden
Age of Lanka' in Ceylon more than two thousand years ago. Of what
avail then is the struggle of human life? Is it for the many or only
for the few? Is all the toil and sorrow of millions merely for the
uplifting and perfecting of certain individual types, and is this
what Christ meant when He said 'Many are called but few are chosen'?
If so, why such waste of brain and heart and love and patience?
Tears came suddenly into my eyes and I started as from a bad dream
when Dr. Brayle approached me softly from behind.

"I am sorry to disturb your reverie!"--he said--"But Miss Harland
has gone into the deck saloon and we are all waiting to hear you
sing."

I looked up at him.

"I don't feel as if I could sing to-night,"--I replied, rather
tremulously--"This lonely landscape depresses me--"

He saw that my eyes were wet, and smiled.

"You are overwrought," he said--"Your own theories of health and
vitality are not infallible! You must be taken care of. You think
too much."

"Or too little?" I suggested.

"Really, my dear lady, you cannot possibly think too little where
health and happiness are concerned! The sanest and most comfortable
people on earth are those who eat well and never think at all. An
empty brain and a full stomach make the sum total of a contented
life."

"So YOU imagine!" I said, with a slight gesture of veiled contempt.

"So I KNOW!" he answered, with emphasis--"And I have had a wide
experience. Now don't look daggers at me!--come and sing!"

He offered me his arm, but I put it aside and walked by myself
towards the deck saloon. Mr. Harland and Catherine were seated
there, with all the lights turned full on, so that the radiance of
the moon through the window was completely eclipsed. The piano was
open. As I came in Catherine looked at me with a surprised air.

"Why, how pale you are!" she exclaimed--"One would think you had
seen a ghost!"

I laughed.

"Perhaps I have! Loch Scavaig is sufficient setting for any amount
of ghosts. It's such a lonely place,"--and a slight tremor ran
through me as I played a few soft chords--"What shall I sing to
you?"

"Something of the country we are in,"--said Mr. Harland--"Don't you
know any of those old wild Gaelic airs?"

I thought a moment, and then to a low rippling accompaniment I sang
the old Celtic 'Fairy's Love Song'--

    "Why should I sit and sigh,
     Pu'in' bracken, pu'in' bracken,
     Why should I sit and sigh,
     On the hill-side dreary--
     When I see the plover rising,
     Or the curlew wheeling,
     Then I know my mortal lover
     Back to me is stealing.

     When the day wears away
     Sad I look adown the valley,
     Every sound heard around
     Sets my heart a-thrilling,--
     Why should I sit and sigh,
     Pu'in' bracken, pu'in' bracken,
     Why should I sit and sigh
     All alone and weary!

     Ah, but there is something wanting,
     Oh but I am weary!
     Come, my true and tender lover,
     O'er the hills to cheer me!
     Why should I sit and sigh,
     Pu'in' bracken, pu'in' bracken,
     Why should I sit and sigh,
     All alone and weary!"

I had scarcely finished the last verse when Captain Derrick suddenly
appeared at the door of the saloon in a great state of excitement.

"Come out, Mr. Harland!" he almost shouted--"Come quickly, all of
you! There's that strange yacht again!"

I rose from my seat at the piano trembling a little--at last!--I
thought--at last! My heart was beating tumultuously, though I could
not explain my own emotion to myself. In another moment we were all
standing speechless and amazed, gazing at surely the most wonderful
sight that had ever been seen by human eyes. There on the dark and
lonely waters of Loch Scavaig was poised, rather than anchored, the
fairy vessel of my dreams, with all sails spread,--sails that were
white as milk and seemingly drenched with a sparkling dewy radiance,
for they scintillated like hoar-frost in the sun and glittered
against the sombre background of the mountainous shore with an
almost blinding splendour. Our whole crew of sailors and servants on
the 'Diana' came together in astonished groups, whispering among
themselves, all evidently more or less scared by the strange
spectacle. Captain Derrick waited for someone to hazard a remark,
then, as we remained silent, he addressed Mr. Harland--

"Well, sir, what do you make of it?"

Mr. Harland did not answer. For a man who professed indifference to
all events and circumstances he seemed startled for once and a
little afraid. Catherine caught me by the arm,--she was shivering
nervously.

"Do you think it is a REAL yacht?" she whispered.

I was amused at this question, coming as it did from a woman who
denied the supernatural.

"Of course it is!" I answered--"Don't you see people moving about on
board?"

For, in the brilliant light shed by those extraordinary sails, the
schooner appeared to be fully manned. Several of the crew were busy
on her deck and there was nothing of the phantom in their movements.

"Her sails must surely be lit up in that way by electricity"--said
Dr. Brayle, who had been watching her attentively--"But how it is
done and why, is rather puzzling! I never saw anything quite to
resemble it."

"She came into the loch like a flash,"--said Captain Derrick--"I saw
her slide in round the point, and then without a sound of any kind,
there she was, safe anchored before you could whistle. She behaved
in just the same way when we first sighted her off Mull."

I listened to what they were saying, impatiently wondering what
would be the end of their surmises and speculations.

"Why not exchange courtesies?" I said, suddenly,--"Here we are--two
yachts anchored near each other in a lonely lake,--why should we not
know each other? Then all the mysteries you are talking about would
be cleared up."

"Quite true!" said Mr. Harland, breaking his silence at last--"But
isn't it rather late to pay a call? What time is it?"

"About half-past ten,"--answered Dr. Brayle, glancing at his watch.

"Oh, let us get to bed!" murmured Miss Catherine, pleadingly--
"What's the good of making any enquiries to-night?"

"Well, if you don't make them to-night ten to one you won't have the
chance to-morrow!"--said Captain Derrick, bluntly--"That yacht will
repeat her former manoeuvres and vanish at sunrise."

"As all spectres are traditionally supposed to do!" said Dr. Brayle,
lighting a cigarette as he spoke and beginning to smoke it with a
careless air--"I vote for catching the ghost before it melts away
into the morning."

While this talk went on Mr. Harland stepped back into the saloon and
wrote a note which he enclosed in a sealed envelope. With this in
his hand he came out to us again.

"Captain, will you get the boat lowered, please?" he said--then, as
Captain Derrick hastened to obey this order, he turned to his
secretary:--"Mr. Swinton, I want you to take this note to the owner
of that yacht, whoever he may be, with my compliments. Don't give it
to anyone else but himself."

Mr. Swinton, looking very pale and uncomfortable, took the note
gingerly between his fingers.

"Himself--yes!"--he stammered--"And--er--if there should be no one--
"

"What do you mean?" and Mr. Harland frowned in his own particularly
unpleasant way--"There's sure to be SOMEONE, even if he were the
devil! You can say to him that the ladies of our party are very much
interested in the beautiful illumination of his yacht, and that
we'll be glad to see him on board ours, if he cares to come. Be as
polite as you can, and as agreeable as you like."

"It has not occurred to you--I suppose you have not thought--that--
that it may be an illusion?" faltered Mr. Swinton, uneasily,
glancing at the glistening sails that shamed the silver sheen of the
moon--"A sort of mirage in the atmosphere--"

Mr. Harland gave vent to a laugh--the heartiest I had ever heard
from him.

"Upon my word, Swinton!" he exclaimed--"I should never have thought
you capable of nerves! Come, come!--be off with you! The boat is
lowered--all's ready!"

Thus commanded, there was nothing for the reluctant Mr. Swinton but
to obey, and I could not help smiling at his evident discomfiture.
All his precise and matter-of-fact self-satisfaction was gone in a
moment,--he was nothing but a very timorous creature, afraid to
examine into what he could not at once understand. No such terrors,
however, were displayed by the sailors who undertook to row him over
to the yacht. They, as well as their captain, were anxious to
discover the mystery, if mystery there was,--and we all, by one
instinct, pressed to the gangway as he descended the companion
ladder and entered the boat, which glided away immediately with a
low and rhythmical plash of oars. We could watch it as it drew
nearer and nearer the illuminated vessel, and our excitement grew
more and more intense. For once Mr. Harland and his daughter had
forgotten all about themselves,--and Catherine's customary miserable
expression of face had altogether disappeared in the keenness of her
interest for something more immediately thrilling than her own
ailments. So far as I was concerned, I could hardly endure the
suspense that seemed to weigh on every nerve of my body during the
few minutes' interval that elapsed between the departure of the boat
and its drawing up alongside the strange yacht. My thoughts were all
in a whirl,--I felt as if something unprecedented and almost
terrifying was about to happen,--but I could not reason out the
cause of my mental agitation.

"There they go!" said Mr. Harland--"They're alongside! See!--those
fellows are lowering the companion ladder--there's nothing
supernatural about THEM! Swinton's all right--look, he's on board!"

We strained our eyes through the brilliant flare shed by the
illuminated sails on the darkness and could see Mr. Swinton talking
to a group of sailors. One of them went away, but returned almost
immediately, followed by a man clad in white yachting flannels, who,
standing near one of the shining sails, caught some of the light on
his own figure with undeniably becoming effect. I was the first to
perceive him, and as I looked, the impression came upon me that he
was no stranger,--I had seen him often before. This sudden
consciousness swiftly borne in upon me calmed all the previous
tumult of my mind and I was no longer anxious as to the result of
our possible acquaintance. Catherine Harland pressed my arm
excitedly.

"There he is!" she said--"That must be the owner of the yacht. He's
reading father's letter."

He was,--we could see the little sheet of paper turning over in his
hands. And while we waited, wondering what would be his answer, the
light on the sails of his vessel began to pale and die away,--beam
after beam of radiance slipped off as it were like drops of water,
and before we could quite realise it there was darkness where all
had lately been so bright; and the canvas was hauled down. With the
quenching of that intense brilliancy we lost sight of the human
figures on deck and could not imagine what was to happen next. The
dark shore looked darker than ever,--the outline of the yacht was
now truly spectral, like a ship of black cobweb against the moon,
and we looked questioningly at each other in silence. Then Mr.
Harland spoke in a low tone.

"The boat is coming back,"--he said,--"I hear the oars."

I leaned over the side of our vessel and tried to see through the
gloom. How still the water was!--not a ripple disturbed its surface.
But there were strange gleams of wandering light in its depths like
dropped jewels lost on sands far below. The regular dip of oars
sounded nearer and nearer. My heart was beating with painful
quickness,--I could not understand the strange feeling that
overpowered me. I felt as if my very soul were going out of my body
to meet that oncoming boat which was cleaving its way through the
darkness. Another brief interval and then we saw it shoot out into a
patch of moonlight--we could perceive Mr. Swinton seated in the
stern with another figure beside him--that of a man who stood up as
he neared our yacht and lifted his cap with an easy gesture of
salutation, and then as the boat came alongside, caught at the guide
rope and sprang lightly on the first step of the companion ladder.

"Why, he's actually come over to us himself!" ejaculated Mr.
Harland,--and he hurried to the gangway just in time to receive the
visitor as he stepped on deck.

"Well, Harland, how are you?" said a mellow voice in the cheeriest
of accents--"It's strange we should meet like this after so many
years!"




VI

RECOGNITION


At these words and at sight of the speaker, Morton Harland started
back as if he had been shot.

"Santoris!" he exclaimed--"Not possible! Rafel Santoris! No! You
must be his son!"

The stranger laughed.

"My good Harland! Always the sceptic! Miracles are many, but there
is one which is beyond all performance. A man cannot be his own
offspring! I am that very Santoris who saw you last in Oxford. Come,
come!--you ought to know me!"

He stepped more fully into the light which was shed from the open
door of the deck saloon, and showed himself to be a man of
distinguished appearance, apparently about forty years of age. He
was well built, with the straight back and broad shoulders of an
athlete,--his face was finely featured and radiant with the glow of
health and strength, and as he smiled and laid one hand on Mr.
Harland's shoulder he looked the very embodiment of active, powerful
manhood. Morton Harland stared at him in amazement and something of
terror.

"Rafel Santoris!" he repeated--"You are his living image,--but you
cannot be himself--you are too young!"

A gleam of amusement sparkled in the stranger's eyes.

"Don't let us talk of age or youth for the moment"--he said. "Here I
am,--your 'eccentric' college acquaintance whom you and several
other fellows fought shy of years ago! I assure you I am quite
harmless! Will you present me to the ladies?"

There was a brief embarrassed pause. Then Mr. Harland turned to us
where we had withdrawn ourselves a little apart and addressed his
daughter.

"Catherine,"--he said--"This gentleman tells me he knew me at
Oxford, and if he is right I also knew HIM. I spoke of him only the
other night at dinner--you remember?--but I did not tell you his
name. It is Rafel Santoris--if indeed he IS Santoris!--though my
Santoris should be a much older man."

"I extremely regret," said our visitor then, advancing and bowing
courteously to Catherine and myself--"that I do not fulfil the
required conditions of age! Will you try to forgive me?"

He smiled--and we were a little confused, hardly knowing what to
say. Involuntarily I raised my eyes to his, and with one glance saw
in those clear blue orbs that so steadfastly met mine a world of
memories--memories tender, wistful and pathetic, entangled as in
tears and fire. All the inward instincts of my spirit told me that I
knew him well--as well as one knows the gold of the sunshine or the
colour of the sky,--yet where had I seen him often and often before?
While my thoughts puzzled over this question he averted his gaze
from mine and went on speaking to Catherine.

"I understand," he said--"that you are interested in the lighting of
my yacht?"

"It is most beautiful and wonderful,"--answered Catherine, in her
coldest tone of conventional politeness, "And so unusual!"

His eyebrows went up with a slightly quizzical.

"Yes, I suppose it is unusual," he said--"I am always forgetting
that what is not quite common seems strange! But really the
arrangement is very simple. The yacht is called the 'Dream'--and she
is, as her name implies, a 'dream' fulfilled. Her sails are her only
motive power. They are charged with electricity, and that is why
they shine at night in a way that must seem to outsiders like a
special illumination. If you will honour me with a visit to-morrow I
will show you how it is managed."

Here Captain Derrick, who had been standing close by, was unable to
resist the impulse of his curiosity.

"Excuse me, sir,"--he said, suddenly--"but may I ask how it is you
sail without wind?"

"Certainly!--you may ask and be answered!" Santoris replied. "As I
have just said, our sails are our only motive power, but we do not
need the wind to fill them. By a very simple scientific method, or
rather let me say by a scientific application of natural means, we
generate a form of electric force from the air and water as we move.
This force fills the sails and propels the vessel with amazing
swiftness wherever she is steered. Neither calm nor storm affects
her progress. When there is a good gale blowing our way, we
naturally lessen the draft on our own supplies--but we can make
excellent speed even in the teeth of a contrary wind. We escape all
the inconveniences of steam and smoke and dirt and noise,--and I
daresay in about a couple of hundred years or so my method of
sailing the seas will be applied to all ships large and small, with
much wonder that it was not thought of long ago."

"Why not apply it yourself?" asked Dr. Brayle, now joining in the
conversation for the first time and putting the question with an air
of incredulous amusement--"With such a marvellous discovery--if it
is yours--you should make your fortune!"

Santoris glanced him over with polite tolerance.

"It is possible I do not need to make it,"--he answered, then
turning again to Captain Derrick he said, kindly, "I hope the matter
seems clearer to you? We sail without wind, it is true, but not
without the power that creates wind."

The captain shook his head perplexedly.

"Well, sir, I can't quite take it in,"--he confessed--"I'd like to
know more."

"So you shall! Harland, will you all come over to the yacht to-
morrow? There may be some excursion we could do together--and you
might remain and dine with me afterwards."

Mr. Harland's face was a study. Doubt and fear struggled for the
mastery in his expression and he did not at once answer. Then he
seemed to conquer his hesitation and to recover himself.

"Give me a moment with you alone,"--he said, with a gesture of
invitation towards the deck saloon.

Our visitor readily complied with this suggestion, and the two men
entered the saloon together and closed the door.

Silence followed. Catherine looked at me in questioning
bewilderment,--then she called to Mr. Swinton, who had been standing
about as though awaiting orders in his usual tiresome and servile
way.

"What sort of an interview did you have with that gentleman when you
got on board his yacht?" she asked.

"Very pleasant--very pleasant indeed"--he replied--"The vessel is
magnificently appointed. I have never seen such luxury.
Extraordinary! More than princely! Mr. Santoris himself I found
particularly agreeable. When he had read Mr. Harland's note, he said
he was glad to find it was from an old college companion, and that
he would come over with me to renew the acquaintance. As he has
done."

"You were not afraid of him, then?" queried Dr. Brayle,
sarcastically.

"Oh dear no! He seems quite well-bred, and I should say he must be
very wealthy."

"A most powerful recommendation!" murmured Brayle--"The best in the
world! What do YOU think of him?" he asked, turning suddenly to me.

"I have no opinion,"--I answered, quietly.

How could I say otherwise? How could I tell such a man as he was, of
one who had entered my life as insistently as a flash of light,
illumining all that had hitherto been dark!

At that moment Catherine caught my hand.

"Listen!" she whispered.

A window of the deck saloon was open and we stood near it. Dr.
Brayle and Mr. Swinton had moved away to light fresh cigars, and we
two women were for the moment alone. We heard Mr. Harland's voice
raised to a sort of smothered cry.

"My God! You ARE Santoris!"

"Of course I am!" And the deep answering tones were full of music,--
the music of a grave and infinitely tender compassion--"Why did you
doubt it? And why call upon God? That is a name which has no meaning
for you."

There followed a silence. I looked at Catherine and saw her pale
face in the light of the moon, haggard in line and older than her
years, and my heart was full of pity for her. She was excited beyond
her usual self-I could see that the appearance of the stranger from
the yacht had aroused her interest and compelled her admiration. I
tried to draw her gently to a farther distance from the saloon, but
she would not move.

"We ought not to listen,"--I said--"Catherine, come away!"

She shook her head.

"Hush!" she softly breathed--"I want to hear!"

Just then Mr. Harland spoke again.

"I am sorry!" he said--"I have wronged you and I apologise. But you
can hardly wonder at my disbelief, considering your appearance,
which is that of a much younger man than your actual years should
make you."

The rich voice of Santoris gave answer.

"Did I not tell you and others long ago that for me there is no such
thing as time, but only eternity? The soul is always young,--and I
live in the Spirit of youth, not in the Matter of age."

Catherine turned her eyes upon me in wide-open amazement.

"He must be mad!" she said.

I made no reply either by word or look. We heard Mr. Harland
talking, but in a lower tone, and we could not distinguish what he
said. Presently Santoris answered, and his vibrant tones were clear
and distinct.

"Why should it seem to you so wonderful?" he said--"You do not think
it miraculous when the sculptor, standing before a shapeless block
of marble, hews it out to conformity with his inward thought. The
marble is mere marble, hard to deal with, difficult to shape,--yet
out of its resisting roughness the thinker and worker can mould an
Apollo or a Psyche. You find nothing marvellous in this, though the
result of its shaping is due to nothing but Thought and Labour. Yet
when you see the human body, which is far easier to shape than
marble, brought into submission by the same forces of Thought and
Labour, you are astonished! Surely it is a simpler matter to control
the living cells of one's own fleshly organisation and compel them
to do the bidding of the dominating spirit than to chisel the
semblance of a god out of a block of stone!"

There was a pause after this. Then followed more inaudible talk on
the part of Mr. Harland, and while we yet waited to gather further
fragments of the conversation, he suddenly threw open the saloon
door and called to us to come in. We at once obeyed the summons, and
as we entered he said in a somewhat excited, nervous way:--

"I must apologise before you ladies for the rather doubting manner
in which I received my former college friend! He IS Rafel Santoris--
I ought to have known that there's only one of his type! But the
curious part of it is that he should be nearly as old as I am,--yet
somehow he is not!"

I laughed. It would have been hard not to laugh, for the mere idea
of comparing the two men, Santoris in such splendid prime and Morton
Harland in his bent, lean and wizened condition, as being of the
same or nearly the same age was quite ludicrous. Even Catherine
smiled--a weak and timorous smile.

"I suppose you have grown old more quickly, father," she said--
"Perhaps Mr. Santoris has not lived at such high pressure."

Santoris, standing by the saloon centre table tinder the full blaze
of the electric lamp, looked at her with a kindly interest.

"High or low, I live each moment of my days to the full, Miss
Harland,"--he said--"I do not drowse it or kill it--I LIVE it! This
lady,"--and he turned his eyes towards me--"looks as if she did the
same!"

"She does!" said Mr. Harland, quickly, and with emphasis--"That's
quite true! You were always a good reader of character, Santoris! I
believe I have not introduced you properly to our little friend"--
here he presented me by name and I held out my hand. Santoris took
it in his own with a light, warm clasp--gently releasing it again as
he bowed. "I call her our little friend, because she brings such an
atmosphere of joy along with her wherever she goes. We persuaded her
to come with us yachting this summer for a very selfish reason--
because we are disposed to be dull and she is always bright,--the
advantage, you see, is all on our side! Oddly enough, I was talking
to her about you the other night--the very night, by the by, that
your yacht came behind us off Mull. That was rather a curious
coincidence when you come to think of it!"

"Not curious at all,"--said Santoris--"but perfectly natural. When
will you realise that there is no such thing as 'coincidence' but
only a very exact system of mathematics?"

Mr. Harland gave a slight, incredulous gesture.

"Your theories again," he said--"You hold to them still! But our
little friend is likely to agree with you,--when I was speaking of
you to her I told her she had somewhat the same ideas as yourself.
She is a sort of a 'psychist'--whatever that may mean!"

"Do you not know?" queried Santoris, with a grave smile--"It is easy
to guess by merely looking at her!"

My cheeks grew warm and my eyes fell beneath his steadfast gaze. I
wondered whether Mr. Harland or Catherine would notice that in his
coat he wore a small bunch of the same kind of bright pink bell-
heather which was my only 'jewel of adorning' that night. The ice of
introductory recognition being broken, we gathered round the saloon
table and sat down, while the steward brought wine and other
refreshments to offer to our guest. Mr. Harland's former uneasiness
and embarrassment seemed now at an end, and he gave himself up to
the pleasure of renewing association with one who had known him as a
young man, and they began talking easily together of their days at
college, of the men they had both been acquainted with, some of whom
were dead, some settled abroad and some lost to sight in the vistas
of uncertain fate. Catherine took very little part in the
conversation, but she listened intently--her colourless eyes were
for once bright, and she watched the face of Santoris as one might
watch an animated picture. Presently Dr. Brayle and Mr. Swinton, who
had been pacing the deck together and smoking, paused near the
saloon door. Mr. Harland beckoned them.

"Come in, come in!" he said--"Santoris, this is my physician, Dr.
Brayle, who has undertaken to look after me during this trip,"--
Santoris bowed--"And this is my secretary, Mr. Swinton, whom I sent
over to your yacht just now." Again Santoris bowed. His slight, yet
perfectly courteous salutation, was in marked contrast with the
careless modern nod or jerk of the head by which the other men
barely acknowledged their introduction to him. "He was afraid of his
life to go to you"--continued Mr. Harland, with a laugh--"He thought
you might be an illusion--or even the devil himself, with those
fiery sails!" Mr. Swinton looked sheepish; Santoris smiled. "This
fair dreamer of dreams"--here he singled me out for notice--"is the
only one of us who has not expressed either surprise or fear at the
sight of your vessel or the possible knowledge of yourself, though
there was one little incident connected with the pretty bunch of
bell-heather she is wearing--why!--you wear the same flower
yourself!"

There was a moment's silence. Everyone stared. The blood burned in
my veins,--I felt my face crimsoning, yet I knew not why I should be
embarrassed or at a loss for words. Santoris came to my relief.

"There's nothing remarkable in that, is there?" he queried, lightly-
-"Bell-heather is quite common in this part of the world. I
shouldn't like to try and count up the number of tourists I've
lately seen wearing it!"

"Ah, but you don't know the interest attaching to this particular
specimen!" persisted Mr. Harland--"It was given to our little friend
by a wild Highland fellow, presumably a native of Mull, the very
morning after she had seen your yacht for the first time, and he
told her that on the previous night he had brought all of the same
kind he could gather to you! Surely you see the connection?"

Santoris shook his head.

"I'm afraid I don't!" he said, smilingly. "Did the 'wild Highland
fellow' name me?"

"No--I believe he called you 'the shentleman that owns the yacht.'"

"Oh well!" and Santoris laughed--"There are so many 'shentlemen'
that own yachts! He may have got mixed in his customers. In any
case, I am glad to have some little thing in common with your
friend--if only a bunch of heather!"

"HER bunch behaves very curiously,"--put in Catherine--"It never
fades."

Santoris made no comment. It seemed as if he had not heard, or did
not wish to hear. He changed the conversation, much to my comfort,
and for the rest of the time he stayed with us, rather avoided
speaking to me, though once or twice I met his eyes fixed earnestly
upon me. The talk drifted in a desultory manner round various
ordinary topics, and I, moving a little aside, took a seat near the
window where I could watch the moon-rays striking a steel-like
glitter on the still waters of Loch Scavaig, and at the same time
hear all that was being said without taking any part in it. I did
not wish to speak,--the uplifted joy of my soul was too intense for
anything but silence. I could not tell why I was so happy,--I only
knew by inward instinct that some point in my life had been reached
towards which I had striven for a far longer period than I myself
was aware of. There was nothing for me now but to wait with faith
and patience for the next step forward--a step which I felt would
not be taken alone. And I listened with interest while Mr. Harland
put his former college friend through a kind of inquisitorial
examination as to what he had been doing and where he had been
journeying since they last met. Santoris seemed not at all unwilling
to be catechised.

"When I escaped from Oxford,"--he said--but here Mr. Harland
interposed.

"Escaped!" he exclaimed--"You talk as if you had been kept in
prison."

"So I was"--Santoris replied--"Oxford is a prison, to all who want
to feed on something more than the dry bones of learning. While
there I was like the prodigal son,--exiled from my Father's House.
And I 'did eat the husks that the swine did eat.' Many fellows have
to do the same. Sometimes--though not often--a man arrives with a
constitution unsuited to husks. Mine was--and is--such an one."

"You secured honours with the husks," said Mr. Harland.

Santoris gave a gesture of airy contempt.

"Honours! Such honours! Any fellow unaddicted to drinking, with a
fair amount of determined plod could win them. The alleged
'difficulties' in the way are perfectly childish. They scarcely
deserve to be called the pothooks and hangers of an education. I
always got my work done in two or three hours--the rest of my time
at college was pure leisure,--which I employed in other and wiser
forms of study than those of the general curriculum--as you know."

"You mean occult mysteries and things of that sort?"

"'Occult' is a word of such new coinage that it is not found in many
dictionaries,"--said Santoris, with a mirthful look--"You will not
find it, for instance, in the earlier editions of Stormonth's
reliable compendium. I do not care for it myself; I prefer to say
'Spiritual science.'"

"You believe in that?" asked Catherine, abruptly.

"Assuredly! How can I do otherwise, seeing that it is the Key to the
Soul of Nature?" "That's too deep for me!" said Dr. Brayle, pouring
himself out a glass of whisky and mixing it with soda-water--"If
it's a riddle I give it up!"

Santoris was silent. There was a moment's pause. Then Catherine
leaned forward across the table, looking at him with tired,
questioning eyes.

"Could you not explain?" she murmured.

"Easily!" he answered--"Anyone can understand it with a little
attention. What I mean is this,--you know that the human body
outwardly expresses its inward condition of health, mentality and
spirituality--well, in exactly the same way Nature, in her countless
varying presentations of beauty and wisdom, expresses the Soul of
herself, or the spiritual force which supports her existence.
'Spiritual science' is the knowledge, not of the outward effect so
much as of the inward cause which makes the effect manifest. It is a
knowledge which can be applied to the individual daily uses of
life,--the more it is studied, the more reward it bestows, and the
smallest portion of it thoroughly mastered, is bound to lead to some
discovery, simple or complex, which lifts the immortal part of a man
a step higher on the way it should go."

"You are satisfied with your researches, then?" asked Mr. Harland.

Santoris smiled gravely.

"Do I look like a man that has failed?" he answered.

Mr. Harland studied his handsome face and figure with ill-concealed
envy.

"You went abroad from Oxford?" he queried.

"Yes. I went back to the old home in Egypt--the house where I was
born and bred. It had been well kept and cared for by the faithful
servant to whom my father had entrusted it--as well kept as a Royal
Chamber in the Pyramids with the funeral offerings untouched and a
perpetual lamp burning. It was the best of all possible places in
which to continue my particular line of work without interruption--
and I have stayed there most of the time, only coming away, as now,
when necessary for a change and a look at the world as the world
lives in these days."

"And"--here Mr. Harland hesitated, then went on--"Are you married?"

Santoris lifted his eyes and regarded his former college
acquaintance fixedly.

"That question is unnecessary"--he said--"You know I am not."

There was a brief awkward pause. Dr. Brayle looked up with a
satirical smile.

"Spiritual science has probably taught you to beware of the fair
sex"--he said.

"I do not entirely understand you"--answered Santoris, coldly--"But
if you mean that I am not a lover of women in the plural you are
right."

"Perhaps of the one woman--the one rare pearl in the deep sea"--
hinted Dr. Brayle, unabashed.

"Come, you are getting too personal, Brayle," interrupted Mr.
Harland, quickly, and with asperity--"Santoris, your health!"

He raised a glass of wine to his lips--Santoris did the same--and
this simple courtesy between the two principals in the conversation
had the effect of putting their subordinate in his proper place.

"It seems superfluous to wish health to Mr. Santoris," said
Catherine then--"He evidently has it in perfection."

Santoris looked at her with kindly interest.

"Health is a law, Miss Harland"--he said--"It is our own fault if we
trespass against it."

"Ah, you say that because you are well and strong," she answered, in
a plaintive tone--"But if you were afflicted and suffering you would
take a different view of illness."

He smiled, somewhat compassionately.

"I think not,"--he said--"If I were afflicted and suffering, as you
say, I should know that by my own neglect, thoughtlessness,
carelessness or selfishness I had injured my organisation mentally
and physically, and that, therefore, the penalty demanded was just
and reasonable."

"Surely you do not maintain that a man is responsible for his own
ailments?" said Mr. Harland--"That would be too far-fetched, even
for YOU! Why, as a matter of fact a wretched human being is not only
cursed with his own poisoned blood but with the poisoned blood of
his forefathers, and, according to the latest medical science, the
very air and water swarm with germs of death for the unsuspecting
victim."

"Or germs of life!" said Santoris, quietly--"According to my
knowledge or 'theory,' as you prefer to call it, there are no germs
of actual death. There are germs which disintegrate effete forms of
matter merely to allow the forces of life to rebuild them again--and
these may propagate in the human system if it so happens that the
human system is prepared to receive them. Their devastating process
is called disease, but they never begin their work till the being
they attack has either wasted a vital opportunity or neglected a
vital necessity. Far more numerous are the beneficial germs of
revivifying and creative power--and if these find place, they are
bound to conquer those whose agency is destructive. It all depends
on the soil and pasture you offer them. Evil thoughts make evil
blood, and in evil blood disease germinates and flourishes. Pure
thoughts make pure blood and rebuild the cells of health and
vitality. I grant you there is such a thing as inherited disease,
but this could be prevented in a great measure by making the
marriage of diseased persons a criminal offence,--while much of it
could be driven out by proper care in childhood. Unfortunately, the
proper care is seldom given."

"What would you call proper care?" asked Catherine.

"Entire absence of self-indulgence, to begin with,"--he answered--
"No child should be permitted to have its own way or expect to have
it. The first great lesson of life should be renunciation of self."

A faint colour crept into Catherine's faded cheeks. Mr. Harland
fidgeted in his chair.

"Unless a man looks after himself, no one else will look after him"-
-he said.

"Reasonable care of one's self is UNselfishness," replied Santoris--
"But anything in excess of reasonable care is pure vice. A man
should work for his livelihood chiefly in order not to become a
burden on others. In the same way he should take care of his health
so that he may avoid being a troublesome invalid, dependent on
others' compassion. To be ill is to acknowledge neglect of existing
laws and incapacity of resistance to evil."

"You lay down a very hard and fast rule, Mr. Santoris"--said Dr.
Brayle--"Many unfortunate people are ill through no fault of their
own."

"Pardon me for my dogmatism when I say such a thing is impossible"--
answered Santoris--"If a human being starts his life in health he
cannot be ill UNLESS through some fault of his own. It may be a
moral or a physical fault, but the trespass against the law has been
made. And suppose him to be born with some inherited trouble, he can
eliminate even that from his blood if he so determines. Man was not
meant to be sickly, but strong--he is not intended to dwell on this
earth as a servant but as a master,--and all the elements of
strength and individual sovereignty are contained in Nature for his
use and advantage if he will but accept them as frankly as they are
offered ungrudgingly. I cannot grant you "--and he smiled--"even the
smallest amount of voluntary or intended mischief in the Divine
plan!"

At that moment Captain Derrick looked in at the saloon door to
remind us that the boat was still waiting to take our visitor back
to his own yacht. He rose at once, with a briefly courteous apology
for having stayed so long, and we all vent with him to see him off.
It was arranged that we were to join him on board his vessel next
day, and either take a sail with him along the island coast or else
do the excursion on foot to Loch Coruisk, which was a point not to
be missed. As we walked all together along the moonlit deck a chance
moment placed him by my side while the others were moving on ahead.
I felt rather than saw his eyes upon me, and looked up swiftly in
obedience to his compelling glance. There was a light of eloquent
meaning in the expression of his face, but he spoke in perfectly
conventional tones:--

"I am glad to have met you at last,"--he said, quietly--"I have
known you by name--and in the spirit--a long time."

I did not answer. My heart was beating rapidly with an excitation of
nameless joy and fear commingled.

"To-morrow"--he went on--"we shall be able to talk together, I
hope,--I feel that there are many things in which we are mutually
interested."

Still I could not speak.

"Sometimes it happens"--he continued, in a voice that trembled a
little--"that two people who are not immediately conscious of having
met before, feel on first introduction to each other as if they were
quite old friends. Is it not so?"

I murmured a scarcely audible assent.

He bent his head and looked at me searchingly,--a smile was on his
lips and his eyes were full of tenderness.

"Till to-morrow is not long to wait,"--he said--"Not long--after so
many years! Good-night!"

A sense of calm and sweet assurance swept over me.

"Good-night!" I answered, with a smile of happy response to his own-
-"Till to-morrow!"

We were close to the gangway where the others already stood. In
another couple of minutes he had made his adieux to our whole party
and was on his way back to his own vessel. The boat in which he sat,
rowed strongly by our men, soon disappeared like a black blot on the
general darkness of the water, yet we remained for some time
watching, as though we could see it even when it was no longer
visible.

"A strange fellow!" said Dr. Brayle when we moved away at last,
flinging the end of his cigar over the yacht side--"Something of
madness and genius combined."

Mr. Harland turned quickly upon him.

"You mistake,"--he answered--"There's no madness, though there is
certainly genius. He's of the same mind as he was when I knew him at
college. There never was a saner or more brilliant scholar."

"It's curious you should meet him again like this,"--said Catherine-
-"But surely, father, he's not as old as you are?"

"He's about three and a half years younger--that's all."

Dr. Brayle laughed.

"I don't believe it for a moment!" he said--"I think he's playing a
part. He's probably not the man you knew at Oxford at all."

We were then going to our cabins for the night, and Mr. Harland
paused as these words were said and faced us.

"He IS the man!"--he said, emphatically--"I had my doubts of him at
first, but I was wrong. As for 'playing a part,' that would be
impossible to him. He is absolutely truthful--almost to the verge of
cruelty!" A curious expression came into his eyes, as of hidden
fear. "In one way I am glad to have met him again--in another I am
sorry. For he is a disturber of the comfortable peace of
conventions. You"--here he regarded me suddenly, as if he had almost
forgotten my presence--"will like him. You have many ideas in common
and will be sure to get on well together. As for me, I am his direct
opposite,--the two poles are not wider apart than we are in our
feelings, sentiments and beliefs." He paused, seeming to be troubled
by the passing cloud of some painful thought--then he went on--
"There is one thing I should perhaps explain, especially to you,
Brayle, to save useless argument. It is, of course, a 'craze'--but
craze or not, he is absolutely immovable on one point which he calls
the great Fact of Life,--that there is and can be no Death,--that
Life is eternal and therefore in all its forms indestructible."

"Does he consider himself immune from the common lot of mortals?"
asked Dr. Brayle, with a touch of derision.

"He denies 'the common lot' altogether"--replied Mr. Harland--"For
him, each individual life is a perpetual succession of progressive
changes, and he holds that a change IS never and CAN never be made
till the person concerned has prepared the next 'costume' or mortal
presentment of immortal being, according to voluntary choice and
liking."

"Then he is mad!" exclaimed Catherine. "He must be mad!"

I smiled.

"Then I am mad too,"--I said--"For I believe as he does. May I say
good-night?"

And with that I left them, glad to be alone with myself and my
heart's secret rapture.




VII

MEMORIES


Perfect happiness is the soul's acceptance of a sense of joy without
question. And this is what I felt through all my being on that
never-to-be-forgotten night. Just as a tree may be glad of the soft
wind blowing its leaves, or a daisy in the grass may rejoice in the
warmth of the sun to which it opens its golden heart without either
being able to explain the delicious ecstasy, so I was the recipient
of light and exquisite felicity which could have no explanation or
analysis. I did not try to think,--it was enough for me simply to
BE. I realised, of course, that with the Harlands and their two paid
attendants, the materialist Dr. Brayle, and the secretarial machine,
Swinton, Rafel Santoris could have nothing in common,--and as I
know, by daily experience, that not even the most trifling event
happens without a predestined cause for its occurrence and a purpose
in its result, I was sure that the reason for his coming into touch
with us at all was to be found in connection, through some
mysterious intuition, with myself. However, as I say, I did not
think about it,--I was content to breathe the invigorating air of
peace and serenity in which my spirit seemed to float on wings. I
slept like a child who is only tired out with play and pleasure,--I
woke like a child to whom the world is all new and brimful of
beauty. That it was a sunny day seemed right and natural--clouds and
rain could hardly have penetrated the brilliant atmosphere in which
I lived and moved. It was an atmosphere of my own creating, of
course, and therefore not liable to be disturbed by storms unless I
chose. It is possible for every human being to live in the sunshine
of the soul whatever may be the material surroundings of the body.
The so-called 'practical' person would have said to me:--'Why are
you happy?' There is no real cause for this sudden elation. You think
you have met someone who is in sympathy with your tastes, ideas and
feelings,--but you may be quite wrong, and this bright wave of joy
into which you are plunging heedlessly may fling you bruised and
broken on a desolate shore for the remainder of your life. One would
think you had fallen in love at first sight.

To which I should have replied that there is no such thing as
falling in love at first sight,--that the very expression--'falling
in love'--conveys a false idea, and that what the world generally
calls 'love' is not love at all. Moreover, there was nothing in my
heart or mind with regard to Rafel Santoris save a keen interest and
sense of friendship. I was sure that his beliefs were the same as
mine, and that he had been working along the same lines which I had
endeavoured to follow; and just as two musicians, inspired by a
mutual love of their art, may be glad to play their instruments
together in time and tune, even so I felt that he and I had met on a
plane of thought where we had both for a long time been separately
wandering.

The 'Dream' yacht, with its white sails spread ready for a cruise,
was as beautiful by day in the sunshine under a blue sky as by night
with its own electric radiance flashing its outline against the
stars, and I was eager to be on board. We were, however, delayed by
an 'attack of nerves' on the part of Catherine, who during the
morning was seized with a violent fit of hysteria to which she
completely gave way, sobbing, laughing and gasping for breath in a
manner which showed her to be quite unhinged and swept from self-
control. Dr. Brayle took her at once in charge, while Mr. Harland
fumed and fretted, pacing up and down in the saloon with an angry
face and brooding eyes. He looked at me where I stood waiting, ready
dressed for the excursion of the day, and said:

"I'm sorry for all this worry. Catherine gets worse and worse. Her
nerves tear her to pieces."

"She allows them to do so,"--I answered--"And Dr. Brayle allows her
to give them their way."

He shrugged his shoulders.

"You don't like Brayle,"--he said--"But he's clever, and he does his
best."

"To keep his patients,"--I hinted, with a smile.

He turned on his heel and faced me.

"Well now, come!" he said--"Could YOU cure her?"

"I could have cured her in the beginning,"--I replied, "But hardly
now. No one can cure her now but herself."

He paced up and down again.

"She won't be able to go with us to visit Santoris," he said--"I'm
sure of that."

"Shall we put it off?" I suggested.

His eyebrows went up in surprise at me.

"Why no, certainly not. It will be a change for you and a pleasure
of which I would not deprive you. Besides, I want to go myself. But
Catherine--"

Dr. Brayle here entered the saloon with his softest step and most
professional manner.

"Miss Harland is better now,"--he said--"She will be quite calm in a
few minutes. But she must remain quiet. It will not be safe for her
to attempt any excursion today."

"Well, that need not prevent the rest of us from going."--said Mr.
Harland.

"Oh no, certainly not! In fact, Miss Harland said she hoped you
would go, and make her excuses to Mr. Santoris. I shall, of course,
be in attendance on her."

"You won't come, then?"--and an unconscious look of relief
brightened Mr. Harland's features--"And as Swinton doesn't wish to
join us, we shall be only a party of three--Captain Derrick, myself
and our little friend here. We may as well be off. Is the boat
ready?"

We were informed that Mr. Santoris had sent his own boat and men to
fetch us, and that they had been waiting for some few minutes. We at
once prepared to go, and while Mr. Harland was getting his overcoat
and searching for his field-glasses, Dr. Brayle spoke to me in a low
tone--

"The truth of the matter is that Miss Harland has been greatly upset
by the visit of Mr. Santoris and by some of the things he said last
night. She could not sleep, and was exceedingly troubled in her mind
by the most distressing thoughts. I am very glad she has decided not
to see him again to-day."

"Do you consider his influence harmful?" I queried, somewhat amused.

"I consider him not quite sane,"--Dr. Brayle answered, coldly--"And
highly nervous persons like Miss Harland are best without the
society of clever but wholly irresponsible theorists."

The colour burned in my cheeks.

"You include me in that category, of course,"--I said, quietly--"For
I said last night that if Mr. Santoris was mad, then I am too, for I
hold the same views."

He smiled a superior smile.

"There is no harm in you,"--he answered, condescendingly--"You may
think what you like,--you are only a woman. Very clever--very
charming--and full of the most delightful fancies,--but weighted
(fortunately) with the restrictions of your sex. I mean no offence,
I assure you,--but a woman's 'views,' whatever they are, are never
accepted by rational beings."

I laughed.

"I see! And rational beings must always be men!" I said--"You are
quite certain of that?"

"In the fact that men ordain the world's government and progress,
you have your answer,"--he replied.

"Alas, poor world!" I murmured--"Sometimes it rebels against the
'rationalism' of its rulers!"

Just then Mr. Harland called me, and I hastened to join him and
Captain Derrick. The boat which was waiting for us was manned by
four sailors who wore white jerseys trimmed with scarlet, bearing
the name of the yacht to which they belonged--the 'Dream.' These men
were dark-skinned and dark-eyed,--we took them at first for
Portuguese or Malays, but they turned out to be from Egypt. They
saluted us, but did not speak, and as soon as we were seated, pulled
swiftly away across the water. Captain Derrick watched their
movements with great interest and curiosity.

"Plenty of grit in those chaps,"--he said, aside to Mr. Harland--
"Look at their muscular arms! I suppose they don't speak a word of
English."

Mr. Harland thereupon tried one of them with a remark about the
weather. The man smiled--and the sudden gleam of his white teeth
gave a wonderful light and charm to his naturally grave cast of
countenance.

"Beautiful day!"--he said,--"Very happy sky!"

This expression 'happy sky' attracted me. It recalled to my mind a
phrase I had once read in the translation of an inscription found in
an Egyptian sarcophagus--"The peace of the morning befriend thee,
and the light of the sunset and the happiness of the sky." The words
rang in my ears with an odd familiarity, like the verse of some poem
loved and learned by heart in childhood.

In a very few minutes we were alongside the 'Dream' and soon on
board, where Rafel Santoris received us with kindly courtesy and
warmth of welcome. He expressed polite regret at the absence of Miss
Harland--none for that of Dr. Brayle or Mr. Swinton--and then
introduced us to his captain, an Italian named Marino Fazio, of whom
Santoris said to us, smilingly:--

"He is a scientist as well as a skipper--and he needs to be both in
the management of such a vessel as this. He will take Captain
Derrick in his charge and explain to him the mystery of our
brilliant appearance at night, and also the secret of our sailing
without wind."

Fazio saluted, and smiled a cheerful response.

"Are you ready to start now?" he asked, speaking very good English
with just the slightest trace of a foreign accent.

"Perfectly!"

Fazio lifted his hand with a sign to the man at the wheel. Another
moment and the yacht began to move. Without the slightest noise,--
without the grinding of ropes, or rattling of chains, or creaking
boards, she swung gracefully round, and began to glide through the
water with a swiftness that was almost incredible. The sails filled,
though the air was intensely warm and stirless--an air in which any
ordinary schooner would have been hopelessly becalmed,--and almost
before we knew it we were out of Loch Scavaig and flying as though
borne on the wings of some great white bird, all along the wild and
picturesque coast of Skye towards Loch Bracadale. One of the most
remarkable features about the yacht was the extraordinary lightness
with which she skimmed the waves--she seemed to ride on their
surface rather than part them with her keel. Everything on board
expressed the finest taste as well as the most perfect convenience,
and I saw Mr. Plarland gazing about him in utter amazement at the
elegant sumptuousness of his surroundings. Santoris showed us all
over the vessel, talking to us with the ease of quite an old friend.

"You know the familiar axiom,"--he said--"'Anything worth doing at
all is worth doing well.' The 'Dream' was first of all nothing but a
dream in my brain till I set to work with Fazio and made it a
reality. Owing to our discovery of the way in which to compel the
waters to serve us as our motive power, we have no blackening smoke
or steam, so that our furniture and fittings are preserved from
dinginess and tarnish. It was possible to have the saloon delicately
painted, as you see,"--here he opened the door of the apartment
mentioned, and we stepped into it as into a fairy palace. It was
much loftier than the usual yacht saloon, and on all sides the
windows were oval shaped, set in between the most exquisitely
painted panels of sea pieces, evidently the work of some great
artist. Overhead the ceiling was draped with pale turquoise blue
silk forming a canopy, which was gathered in rich folds on all four
sides, having in its centre a crystal lamp in the shape of a star.

"You live like a king"--then said Mr. Harland, a trifle bitterly--
"You know how to use your father's fortune."

"My father's fortune was made to be used," answered Santoris, with
perfect good-humour--"And I think he is perfectly satisfied with my
mode of expending it. But very little of it has been touched. I have
made my own fortune."

"Indeed! How?" And Harland looked as he evidently felt, keenly
interested.

"Ah, that's asking too much of me!" laughed Santoris. "You may be
satisfied, however, that it's not through defrauding my neighbours.
It's comparatively easy to be rich if you have coaxed any of Mother
Nature's secrets out of her. She is very kind to her children, if
they are kind to her,--in fact, she spoils them, for the more they
ask of her the more she gives. Besides, every man should make his
own money even if he inherits wealth,--it is the only way to feel
worthy of a place in this beautiful, ever-working world."

He preceded us out of the saloon and showed us the State-rooms, of
which there were five, daintily furnished in white and blue and
white and rose.

"These are for my guests when I have any," he said, "Which is very
seldom. This for a princess--if ever one should honour me with her
presence!"

And he opened a door on his right, through which we peered into a
long, lovely room, gleaming with iridescent hues and sparkling with
touches of gold and crystal. The bed was draped with cloudy lace
through which a shimmer of pale rose-colour made itself visible, and
the carpet of dark moss-green formed a perfect setting for the
quaintly shaped furniture, which was all of sandal-wood inlaid with
ivory. On a small table of carved ivory in the centre of the room
lay a bunch of Madonna lilies tied with a finely twisted cord of
gold. We murmured our admiration, and Santoris addressed himself
directly to me for the first time since we had come on board.

"Will you go in and rest for a while till luncheon?" he said--"I
placed the lilies there for your acceptance."

The colour rushed to my cheeks,--I looked up at him in a little
wonderment.

"But I am not a princess!"

His eyes smiled down into mine.

"No? Then I must have dreamed you were!"

My heart gave a quick throb,--some memory touched my brain, but what
it was I could not tell. Mr. Harland glanced at me and laughed.

"What did I tell you the other day?" he said--"Did I not call you
the princess of a fairy tale? I was not far wrong!"

They left me to myself then, and as I stood alone in the beautiful
room which had thus been placed at my disposal, a curious feeling
came over me that these luxurious surroundings were, after all, not
new to my experience. I had been accustomed to them for a great part
of my life. Stay!--how foolish of me!--'a great part of my life'?--
then what part of it? I briefly reviewed my own career,--a difficult
and solitary childhood,--the hard and uphill work which became my
lot as soon as I was old enough to work at all,--incessant study,
and certainly no surplus of riches. Then where had I known luxury? I
sank into a chair, dreamily considering. The floating scent of
sandal-wood and the perfume of lilies commingled was like the breath
of an odorous garden in the East, familiar to me long ago, and as I
sat musing I became conscious of a sudden inrush of power and sense
of dominance which lifted me as it were above myself, as though I
had, without any warning, been given the full control of a great
kingdom and its people. Catching sight of my own reflection in an
opposite mirror, I was startled and almost afraid at the expression
of my face, the proud light in my eyes, the smile on my lips.

"What am I thinking of!" I said, half aloud--"I am not my true self
to-day,--some remnant of a cast-off pride has arisen in me and made
me less of a humble student. I must not yield to this overpowering
demand on my soul,--it is surely an evil suggestion which asserts
itself like the warning pain or fever of an impending disease. Can
it be the influence of Santoris? No!--I will never believe it!"

And yet a vague uneasiness beset me, and I rose and paced about
restlessly,--then pausing where the lovely Madonna lilies lay on the
ivory table, I remembered they had been put there for me. I raised
them gently, inhaling their delicious fragrance, and as I did so,
saw, lying immediately underneath them, a golden Cross of a mystic
shape I knew well,--its upper half set on the face of a seven-
pointed Star, also of gold. With joy I took it up and kissed it
reverently, and as I compared it with the one I always secretly wore
on my own person, I knew that all was well, and that I need have no
distrust of Rafel Santoris. No injurious effect on my mind could
possibly be exerted by his influence--and I was thrown back on
myself for a clue to that singular wave of feeling, so entirely
contrary to my own disposition, which had for a moment overwhelmed
me. I could not trace its source, but I speedily conquered it.
Fastening one of the snowy lilies in my waistband, as a contrast to
the bright bit of bell-heather which I cherished even more than if
it were a jewel, I presently went up on deck, where I found my host,
Mr. Harland, Captain Derrick and Marino Fazio all talking animatedly
together.

"The mystery is cleared up,"--said Mr. Harland, addressing me as I
approached--"Captain Derrick is satisfied. He has learned how one of
the finest schooners he has ever seen can make full speed in any
weather without wind."

"Oh no, I haven't learned how to do it,--I'm a long way off that!"--
said Derrick, good-humouredly--"But I've seen how it's done. And
it's marvellous! If that invention could be applied to all ships--"

"Ah!--but first of all it would be necessary to instruct the
shipbuilders!"--put in Fazio--"They would have to learn their trade
all over again. Our yacht looks as though she were built on the same
lines as all yachts,--but you know--you have seen--she is entirely
different!"

Captain Derrick gave a nod of grave emphasis. Santoris meantime had
come to my side. Our glances met,--he saw that I had received and
understood the message of the lilies, and a light and colour came
into his eyes that made them beautiful.

"Men have not yet fully enjoyed their heritage," he said, taking up
the conversation--"Our yacht's motive power seems complex, but in
reality it is very simple,--and the same force which propels this
light vessel would propel the biggest liner afloat. Nature has given
us all the materials for every kind of work and progress, physical
and mental--but because we do not at once comprehend them we deny
their uses. Nothing in the air, earth or water exists which we may
not press into our service,--and it is in the study of natural
forces that we find our conquest. What hundreds of years it took us
to discover the wonders of steam!--how the discoverer was mocked and
laughed at!--yet it was not really 'wonderful'--it was always there,
waiting to be employed, and wasted by mere lack of human effort. One
can say the same of electricity, sometimes called 'miraculous'--it
is no miracle, but perfectly common and natural, only we have, until
now, failed to apply it to our needs,--and even when wider
disclosures of science are being made to us every day, we still bar
knowledge by obstinacy, and remain in ignorance rather than learn. A
few grains in weight of hydrogen have power enough to raise a
million tons to a height of more than three hundred feet,--and if we
could only find a way to liberate economically and with discretion
the various forces which Spirit and Matter contain, we might change
the whole occupation of man and make of him less a labourer than
thinker, less mortal than angel! The wildest fairy-tales might come
true, and earth be transformed into a paradise! And as for motive
power, in a thimbleful of concentrated fuel we might take the
largest ship across the widest ocean. I say if we could only find a
way! Some think they are finding it--"

"You, for example?"--suggested Mr. Harland.

He laughed.

"I--if you like!--for example! Will you come to luncheon?"

He led the way, and Mr. Harland and I followed. Captain Derrick, who
I saw was a little afraid of him, had arranged to take his luncheon
with Fazio and the other officers of the crew apart. We were waited
upon by dark-skinned men attired in the picturesque costume of the
East, who performed their duties with noiseless grace and swiftness.
The yacht had for some time slackened speed, and appeared to be
merely floating lazily on the surface of the calm water. We were
told she could always do this and make almost imperceptible headway,
provided there was no impending storm in the air. It seemed as if we
were scarcely moving, and the whole atmosphere surrounding us
expressed the most delicious tranquillity. The luncheon prepared for
us was of the daintiest and most elegant description, and Mr.
Harland, who on account of his ill-health seldom had any appetite,
enjoyed it with a zest and heartiness I had never seen him display
before. He particularly appreciated the wine, a rich, ruby-coloured
beverage which was unlike anything I had ever tasted.

"There is nothing remarkable about it,"--said Santoris, I when
questioned as to its origin--"It is simply REAL wine,--though you
may say that of itself is remarkable, there being none in the
market. It is the pure juice of the grape, prepared in such a manner
as to nourish the blood without inflaming it. It can do you no
harm,--in fact, for you, Harland, it is an excellent thing."

"Why for me in particular?" queried Harland, rather sharply.

"Because you need it,"--answered Santoris--"My dear fellow, you are
not in the best of health. And you will never get better under your
present treatment."

I looked up eagerly.

"That is what I, too, have thought,"--I said--"only I dared not
express it!"

Mr. Harland surveyed me with an amused smile.

"Dared not! I know nothing you would not dare!--but with all your
boldness, you are full of mere theories,--and theories never made an
ill man well yet."

Santoris exchanged a swift glance with me. Then he spoke:--

"Theory without practice is, of course, useless,"--he said--"But
surely you can see that this lady has reached a certain plane of
thought on which she herself dwells in health and content? And can
she not serve you as an object lesson?"

"Not at all,"--replied Mr. Harland, almost testily--"She is a woman
whose life has been immersed in study and contemplation, and because
she has allowed herself to forego many of the world's pleasures she
can be made happy by a mere nothing--a handful of roses--or the
sound of sweet music--"

"Are they 'nothings'?"--interrupted Santoris.

"To business men they are--"

"And business itself? Is it not also from some points of view a
'nothing'?"

"Santoris, if you are going to be 'transcendental' I will have none
of you!" said Mr. Harland, with a vexed laugh--"What I wish to say
is merely this--that my little friend here, for whom I have a great
esteem, let me assure her!--is not really capable of forming an
opinion of the condition of a man like myself, nor can she judge of
the treatment likely to benefit me. She does not even know the
nature of my illness--but I can see that she has taken a dislike to
my physician, Brayle--"

"I never 'take dislikes,' Mr. Harland,"--I interrupted, quickly--"I
merely trust to a guiding instinct which tells me when a man is
sincere or when he is acting a part. That's all."

"Well, you've decided that Brayle is not sincere,"--he replied--"And
you hardly think him clever. But if you would consider the point
logically--you might enquire what motive could he possibly have for
playing the humbug with me?"

Santoris smiled.

"Oh, man of 'business'! YOU can ask that?"

We were at the end of luncheon,--the servants had retired, and Mr.
Harland was sipping his coffee and smoking a cigar.

"You can ask that?" he repeated--"You, a millionaire, with one
daughter who is your sole heiress, can ask what motive a man like
Brayle,--worldly, calculating and without heart--has in keeping you
both--both, I say--you and your daughter equally--in his medical
clutches?"

Mr. Harland's sharp eyes flashed with a sudden menace.

"If I thought--" he began--then he broke off. Presently he resumed--
"You are not aware of the true state of affairs, Santoris. Wizard
and scientist as you are, you cannot know everything! I need
constant medical attendance--and my disease is incurable--"

"No!"--said Santoris, quietly--"Not incurable."

A sudden hope illumined Harland's worn and haggard face.

"Not incurable! But--my good fellow, you don't even know what it
is!"

"I do. I also know how it began, and when,--how it has progressed,
and how it will end. I know, too, how it can be checked--cut off in
its development, and utterly destroyed,--but the cure would depend
on yourself more than on Dr. Brayle or any other physician. At
present no good is being done and much harm. For instance, you are
in pain now?"

"I am--but how can you tell?"

"By the small, almost imperceptible lines on your face which
contract quite unconsciously to yourself. I can stop that dreary
suffering at once for you, if you will let me."

"Oh, I will 'let' you, certainly!" and Mr. Harland smiled
incredulously,--"But I think you over-estimate your abilities."

"I was never a boaster,"--replied Santoris, cheerfully--"But you
shall keep whatever opinion you like of me." And he drew from his
pocket a tiny crystal phial set in a sheath of gold. "A touch of
this in your glass of wine will make you feel a new man."

We watched him with strained attention as he carefully allowed two
small drops of liquid, bright and clear as dew to fall one after the
other into Mr. Harland's glass.

"Now,"--he continued--"drink without fear, and say good-bye to all
pain for at least forty-eight hours."

With a docility quite unusual to him Mr. Harland obeyed.

"May I go on smoking?" he asked.

"You may."

A minute passed, and Mr. Harland's face expressed a sudden surprise
and relief.

"Well! What now?" asked Santoris--"How is the pain?"

"Gone!" he answered--"I can hardly believe it--but I'm bound to
admit it!"

"That's right! And it will not come back--not to-day, at any rate,
nor to-morrow. Shall we go on deck now?"

We assented. As we left the saloon he said:

"You must see the glow of the sunset over Loch Coruisk. It's always
a fine sight and it promises to be specially fine this evening,--
there are so many picturesque clouds floating about. We are turning
back to Loch Scavaig,--and when we get there we can land and do the
rest of the excursion on foot. It's not much of a climb; will you
feel equal to it?"

This question he put to me personally.

I smiled.

"Of course! I feel equal to anything! Besides, I've been very lazy
on board the 'Diana,' taking no real exercise. A walk will do me
good."

Mr. Harland seated himself in one of the long reclining chairs which
were placed temptingly under an awning on deck. His eyes were
clearer and his face more composed than I had ever seen it.

"Those drops you gave me are magical, Santoris!"--he said--"I wish
you'd let me have a supply!"

Santoris stood looking down upon him kindly.

"It would not be safe for you,"--he answered--"The remedy is a
sovereign one if used very rarely, and with extreme caution, but in
uninstructed hands it is dangerous. Its work is to stimulate certain
cells--at the same time (like all things taken in excess) it can
destroy them. Moreover, it would not agree with Dr. Brayle's
medicines."

"You really and truly think Brayle an impostor?"

"Impostor is a strong word! No!--I will give him credit for
believing in himself up to a certain point. But of course he knows
that the so-called 'electric' treatment he is giving to your
daughter is perfectly worthless, just as he knows that she is not
really ill."

"Not really ill!"

Mr. Harland almost bounced up in his chair, while I felt a secret
thrill of satisfaction. "Why, she's been a miserable, querulous
invalid for years--"

"Since she broke off her engagement to a worthless rascal"--said
Santoris, calmly. "You see, I know all about it."

I listened, astonished. How did he know, how could he know, the
intimate details of a life like Catherine's which could scarcely be
of interest to a man such as he was?

"Your daughter's trouble is written on her face"--he went on--
"Warped affections, slain desires, disappointed hopes,--and neither
the strength nor the will to turn these troubles to blessings.
Therefore they resemble an army of malarious germs which are eating
away her moral fibre. Brayle knows that what she needs is the belief
that someone has an interest not only in her, but in the
particularly morbid view she has taught herself to take of life. He
is actively showing that interest. The rest is easy,--and will be
easier when--well!--when you are gone."

Mr. Harland was silent, drawing slow whiffs from his cigar. After a
long pause, he said--

"You are prejudiced, and I think you are mistaken. You only saw the
man for a few minutes last night, and you know nothing of him--"

"Nothing,--except what he is bound to reveal,"--answered Santoris.

"What do you mean?"

"You will not believe me if I tell you,"--and Santoris, drawing a
chair close to mine, sat down,--"Yet I am sure this lady, who is
your friend and guest, will corroborate what I say,--though, of
course, you will not believe HER! In fact, my dear Harland, as you
have schooled yourself to believe NOTHING, why urge me to point out
a truth you decline to accept? Had you lived in the time of Galileo
you would have been one of his torturers!"

"I ask you to explain," said Mr. Harland, with a touch of pique--
"Whether I accept your explanation or not is my own affair."

"Quite!" agreed Santoris, with a slight smile--"As I told you long
ago at Oxford, a man's life is his own affair entirely. He can do
what he likes with it. But he can no more command the RESULT of what
he does with it than the sun can conceal its rays. Each individual
human being, male and female alike, moves unconsciously in the light
of self-revealment, as though all his or her faults and virtues were
reflected like the colours in a prism, or were set out in a window
for passers-by to gaze upon. Fortunately for the general peace of
society, however, most passers-by are not gifted with the sight to
see the involuntary display."

"You speak in enigmas," said Harland, impatiently--"And I'm not good
at guessing them."

Santoris regarded him fixedly. His eyes were luminous and
compassionate.

"The simplest truths are to you 'enigmas,'" he said, regretfully--"A
pity it is so! You ask me what I mean when I say a man is 'bound to
reveal himself.' The process of self-revealment accompanies self-
existence, as much as the fragrance of a rose accompanies its
opening petals. You can never detach yourself from your own
enveloping aura neither in body nor in soul. Christ taught this when
He said:--'Let your light so shine before men that they may see your
good works and glorify your Father which is in heaven.' Your
'light'--remember!--that word 'light' is not used here as a figure
of speech but as a statement of fact. A positive 'light' surrounds
you--it is exhaled and produced by your physical and moral being,--
and those among us who have cultivated their inner organs of vision
see IT before they see YOU. It can be of the purest radiance,--
equally it can be a mere nebulous film,--but whatever the moral and
physical condition of the man or woman concerned it is always shown
in the aura which each separate individual expresses for himself or
herself. In this way Dr. Brayle reveals his nature to me as well as
the chief tendency of his thoughts,--in this way YOU reveal yourself
and your present state of health,--it is a proved test that cannot
go wrong."

Mr. Harland listened with his usual air of cynical tolerance and
incredulity.

"I have heard this sort of nonsense before,"--he said--"I have even
read in otherwise reliable scientific journals about the 'auras' of
people affecting us with antipathies or sympathies for or against
them. But it's a merely fanciful suggestion and has no foundation in
reality."

"Why did you wish me to explain, then?" asked Santoris--"I can only
tell you what I know, and--what I see!"

Harland moved restlessly, holding his cigar between his fingers and
looking at it curiously to avoid, as I thought, the steadfast
brilliancy of the compelling eyes that were fixed upon him.

"These 'auras,'" he went on, indifferently, "are nothing but
suppositions. I grant you that certain discoveries are being made
concerning the luminosity of trees and plants which in some states
of the atmosphere give out rays of light,--but that human beings do
the same I decline to believe."

"Of course!" and Santoris leaned back in his chair easily, as though
at once dismissing the subject from his mind--"A man born blind must
needs decline to believe in the pleasures of sight."

Harland's wrinkled brow deepened its furrows in a frown.

"Do you mean to tell me,--do you DARE to tell me"--he said--"that
you see any 'aura,' as you call it, round my personality?"

"I do, most assuredly,"--answered Santoris--"I see it as distinctly
as I see yourself in the midst of it. But there is no actual light
in it,--it is mere grey mist,--a mist of miasma."

"Thank you!" and Harland laughed harshly--"You are complimentary!"

"Is it a time for compliments?" asked Santoris, with sudden
sternness--"Harland, would you have me tell you ALL?"

Harland's face grew livid. He threw up his hand with a warning
gesture.

"No!" he said, almost violently. He clutched the arm of his chair
with a nervous grip, and for one instant looked like a hunted
creature caught red-handed in some act of crime. Recovering himself
quickly, he forced a smile.

"What about our little friend's 'aura'?"-he queried, glancing at me-
-"Does she 'express' herself in radiance?"

Santoris did not reply for a moment. Then he turned his eyes towards
me almost wistfully.

"She does!"--he answered--"I wish you could see her as I see her!"

There was a moment's silence. My face grew warm, and I was vaguely
embarrassed, but I met his gaze fully and frankly.

"And _I_ wish I could see myself as you see me,"--I said, half
laughingly--"For I am not in the least aware of my own aura."

"It is not intended that anyone should be visibly aware of it in
their own personality,"--he answered--"But I think it is right we
should realise the existence of these radiant or cloudy exhalations
which we ourselves weave around ourselves, so that we may 'walk in
the light as children of the light.'"

His voice sank to a grave and tender tone which checked Mr. Harland
in something he was evidently about to say, for he bit his lip and
was silent.

I rose from my chair and moved away then, looking--from the smooth
deck of the 'Dream' shadowed by her full white sails out to the
peaks of the majestic hills whose picturesque beauties are sung in
the wild strains of Ossian, and the projecting crags, deep hollows
and lofty pinnacles outlining the coast with its numerous
waterfalls, lochs and shadowy creeks. A thin and delicate haze of
mist hung over the land like a pale violet veil through which the
sun shot beams of rose and gold, giving a vaporous unsubstantial
effect to the scenery as though it were gliding with us like a cloud
pageant on the surface of the calm water. The shores of Loch Scavaig
began to be dimly seen in the distance, and presently Captain
Derrick approached Mr. Harland, spy-glass in hand.

"The 'Diana' must have gone for a cruise,"--he said, in rather a
perturbed way--"As far as I can make out, there's no sign of her
where we left her this morning."

Mr. Harland heard this indifferently.

"Perhaps Catherine wished for a sail,"--he answered. "There are
plenty on board to manage the vessel. You're not anxious?"

"Oh, not at all, sir, if you are satisfied,"--Derrick answered.

Mr. Harland stretched himself luxuriously in his chair.

"Personally, I don't mind where the 'Diana' has gone to for the
moment,"--he said, with a laugh--"I'm particularly comfortable where
I am. Santoris!"

"Here!" And Santoris, who had stepped aside to give some order to
one of his men, came up at the call.

"What do you say to leaving me on board while you and my little
friend go and see your sunset effect on Loch Coruisk by yourselves?"

Santoris heard this suggestion with an amused look.

"You don't care for sunsets?"

"Oh yes, I do,--in a way. But I've seen so many of them--"

"No two alike"--put in Santoris.

"I daresay not. Still, I don't mind missing a few. Just now I should
like a sound sleep rather than a sunset. It's very unsociable, I
know,--but--" here he half closed his eyes and seemed inclined to
doze off there and then.

Santoris turned to me.

"What do you say? Can you put up with my company for an hour or two
and allow me to be your guide to Loch Coruisk? Or would you, too,
rather not see the sunset?",

Our eyes met. A thrill of mingled joy and fear ran through me, and
again I felt that strange sense of power and dominance which had
previously overwhelmed me.

"Indeed, I have set my heart on going to Loch Coruisk"--I answered,
lightly--"And I cannot let you off your promise to take me there! We
will leave Mr. Harland to his siesta."

"You're sure you do not mind?"--said Harland, then, opening his eyes
drowsily--"You will be perfectly safe with Santoris."

I smiled. I did not need that assurance. And I talked gaily with
Captain Derrick on the subject of the 'Diana' and the course of her
possible cruise, while he scanned the waters in search of her,--and
I watched with growing impatience our gradual approach to Loch
Scavaig, which in the bright afternoon looked scarcely less dreary
than at night, especially now that the 'Diana' was no longer there
to give some air of human occupation to the wild and barren
surroundings. The sun was well inclined towards the western horizon
when the 'Dream' reached her former moorings and noiselessly dropped
anchor, and about twenty minutes later the electric launch belonging
to the vessel was lowered and I entered it with Santoris, a couple
of his men managing the boat as it rushed through the dark steel-
coloured water to the shore.




VIII

VISIONS


The touch of the earth seemed strange to me after nearly a week
spent at sea, and as I sprang from the launch on to the rough rocks,
aided by Santoris, I was for a moment faint and giddy. The dark
mountain summits seemed to swirl round me,--and the glittering
water, shining like steel, had the weird effect of a great mirror in
which a fluttering vision of something undefined and undeclared rose
and passed like a breath. I recovered myself with an effort and
stood still, trying to control the foolish throbbing of my heart,
while my companion gave a few orders to his men in a language which
I thought I knew, though I could not follow it.

"Are you speaking Gaelic?" I asked him, with a smile.

"No!--only something very like it--Phoenician."

He looked straight at me as he said this, and his eyes, darkly blue
and brilliant, expressed a world of suggestion. He went on:--

"All this country was familiar ground to the Phoenician colonists of
ages ago. I am sure you know that! The Gaelic tongue is the genuine
dialect of the ancient Phoenician Celtic, and when I speak the
original language to a Highlander who only knows his native Gaelic
he understands me perfectly."

I was silent. We moved away from the shore, walking slowly side by
side. Presently I paused, looking back at the launch we had just
left.

"Your men are not Highlanders?"

"No--they are from Egypt."

"But surely,"--I said, with some hesitation--"Phoenician is no
longer known or spoken?"

"Not by the world of ordinary men,"--he answered--"I know it and
speak it,--and so do most of those who serve me. You have heard it
before, only you do not quite remember." I looked at him, startled.
He smiled, adding gently:--"Nothing dies--not even a language!"

We were not yet out of sight of the men. They had pushed the launch
off shore again and were starting it back to the yacht, it being
arranged that they should return for us in a couple of hours. We
were following a path among slippery stones near a rushing torrent,
but as we turned round a sharp bend we lost the view of Loch Scavaig
itself and were for the first time truly alone. Huge mountains,
crowned with jagged pinnacles, surrounded us on all sides,--here and
there tufts of heather clinging to large masses of dark stone blazed
rose-purple in the declining sunshine,--the hollow sound of the
falling stream made a perpetual crooning music in our ears, and the
warm, stirless air seemed breathless, as though hung in suspense
above us waiting for the echo of some word or whisper that should
betray a life's secret. Such a silence held us that it was almost
unbearable,--every nerve in my body seemed like a strained harp-
string ready to snap at a touch,--and yet I could not speak. I tried
to get the mastery over the rising tide of thought, memory and
emotion that surged in my soul like a tempest--swiftly and
peremptorily I argued with myself that the extraordinary chaos of my
mind was only due to my own imaginings,--nevertheless, despite my
struggles, I remained caught as it were in a web that imprisoned
every faculty and sense,--a web fine as gossamer, yet unbreakable as
iron. In a kind of desperation I raised my eyes, burning with the
heat of restrained tears, and saw Santoris watching me with patient,
almost appealing tenderness. I felt that he could read my
unexpressed trouble, and involuntarily I stretched out my hands to
him.

"Tell me!" I half whispered-"What is it I must know? We are
strangers--and yet--"

He caught my hands in his own.

"Not strangers!" he said, his voice trembling a little--"You cannot
say that! Not strangers--but old friends!"

The strong gentleness of his clasp recalled the warm pressure of the
invisible hands that had guided me out of darkness in my dream of a
few nights past. I looked up into his face, and every line of it
became suddenly, startlingly familiar. The deep-set blue eyes,--the
broad brows and intellectual features were all as well known to me
as might be the portrait of a beloved one to the lover, and my heart
almost stood still with the wonder and terror of the recognition.

"Not strangers,"--he repeated, with quiet emphasis, as though to
reassure me--"Only since we last met we have travelled far asunder.
Have yet a little patience! You will presently remember me as well
as I remember you!"

With the rush of startled recollection I found my voice.

"I remember you now!"--I said, in low, unsteady tones--"I have seen
you often--often! But where? Tell me where? Oh, surely you know!"

He still held my hands with the tenderest force,--and seemed, like
myself, to find speech difficult. If two deeply attached friends,
parted for many years, were all unexpectedly to meet in some
solitary place where neither had thought to see a living soul, their
emotion could hardly be keener than ours,--and yet--there was an
invisible barrier between us--a barrier erected either by him or by
myself,--something that held us apart. The sudden and overpowering
demand made upon our strength by the swift and subtle attraction
which drew us together was held in check by ourselves,--and it was
as if we were each separately surrounded by a circle across which
neither of us dared to pass. I looked at him in mingled fear and
questioning--his eyes were gravely thoughtful and full of light.

"Yes, I know,"--he answered, at last, speaking very softly--while,
gently releasing one of my hands, he held the other--"I know,--but
we need not speak of that! As I have already said, you will remember
all by gradual degrees. We are never permitted to entirely forget.
But it is quite natural that now--at this immediate hour--we should
find it strange--you, perhaps, more than I--that something impels us
one to the other,--something that will not be gainsaid,--something
that if all the powers of earth and heaven could intervene, which by
simplest law they cannot, will take no denial!"

I trembled, not with fear, but with an exquisite delight I dared not
pause to analyse. He pressed my hand more closely.

"We had better walk on,"--he continued, averting his gaze from mine
for the moment--"If I say more just now I shall say too much--and
you will be frightened,--perhaps offended. I have been guilty of so
many errors in the past,--you must help me to avoid them in the
future. Come!"--and he turned his eyes again upon me with a smile--
"Let us see the sunset!"

We moved on for a few moments in absolute silence, he still holding
my hand and guiding me up the rough path we followed. The noise of
the rushing torrent sounded louder in my ears, sometimes with a
clattering insistence as though it sought to match itself against
the surging of my own quick blood in an endeavour to drown my
thoughts. On we went and still onward,--the path seemed
interminable, though it was in reality a very short journey. But
there was such a weight of unutterable things pressing on my soul
like a pent-up storm craving for outlet, that every step measured
itself as almost a mile.

At last we paused; we were in full view of Loch Coruisk and its
weird splendour. On all sides arose bare and lofty mountains, broken
and furrowed here and there by deep hollows and corries,--supremely
grand in their impressive desolation, uplifting their stony peaks
around us like the walls and turrets of a gigantic fortress, and
rising so abruptly and so impenetrably encompassing the black
stretch of water below, that it seemed impossible for a sunbeam to
force its shining entrance into such a circle of dense gloom. Yet
there was a shower of golden light pouring aslant down one of the
highest of the hills, brightening to vivid crimson stray clumps of
heather, touching into pale green some patches of moss and lichen,
and giving the dazzling flash of silver to the white wings of a sea-
gull which soared above our heads uttering wild cries like a
creature in pain. Pale blue mists were rising from the surface of
the lake, and the fitful gusts of air that rushed over the rocky
summits played with these impalpable vapours borne inland from the
Atlantic, and tossed them to and fro into fantastic shapes--some
like flying forms with long hair streaming behind them--some like
armed warriors, hurtling their spears against each other,--and some
like veiled ghosts hurrying past as though driven to their land of
shadows by shuddering fear. We stood silently hand in hand, watching
the uneasy flitting of these cloud phantoms, and waiting for the
deepening glow, which, when it should spread upwards from the rays
of the sinking sun, would transform the wild, dark scene to one of
almost supernatural splendour. Suddenly Santoris spoke:

"Now shall I tell you where we last met?" he asked, very gently--
"And may I show you the reasons why we meet again?"

I lifted my eyes to his. My heart beat with suffocating quickness,
and thoughts were in my brain that threatened to overwhelm my small
remaining stock of self-control and make of me nothing but a
creature of tears and passion. I moved my lips in an effort to
speak, but no sound came from them.

"Do not be afraid,"--he continued, in the same quiet tone--"It is
true that we must be careful now as in the past we were careless,--
but perfect comprehension of each other rests with ourselves. May I
go on?"

I gave a mute sign of assent. There was a rough craig near us,
curiously shaped like a sort of throne and canopy, the canopy being
formed by a thickly overhanging mass of rock and heather, and here
he made me sit down, placing himself beside me. From this point we
commanded a view of the head of the lake and the great mountain
which closes and dominates it,--and which now began to be illumined
with a strange witch-like glow of orange and purple, while a thin
mist moved slowly across it like the folds of a ghostly stage
curtain preparing to rise and display the first scene of some great
drama.

"Sometimes," he then said,--"it happens, even in the world of cold
and artificial convention, that a man and woman are brought together
who, to their own immediate consciousness, have had no previous
acquaintance with each other, and yet with the lightest touch, the
swiftest glance of an eye, a million vibrations are set quivering in
them like harp-strings struck by the hand of a master and responding
each to each in throbbing harmony and perfect tune. They do not know
how it happens--they only feel it is. Then, nothing--I repeat this
with emphasis--nothing can keep them apart. Soul rushes to soul,--
heart leaps to heart,--and all form and ceremony, custom and usage
crumble into dust before the power that overwhelms them. These
sudden storms of etheric vibration occur every day among the most
ordinary surroundings and with the most unlikely persons, and
Society as at present constituted frowns and shakes its head, or
jeers at what it cannot understand, calling such impetuosity folly,
or worse, while remaining wilfully blind to the fact that in its
strangest aspect it is nothing but the assertion of an Eternal Law.
Moreover, it is a law that cannot be set aside or broken with
impunity. Just as the one point of vibration sympathetically strikes
the other in the system of wireless telegraphy, so, despite millions
and millions of intervening currents and lines of divergence, the
immortal soul-spark strikes its kindred fire across a waste of
worlds until they meet in the compelling flash of that God's Message
called Love!"

He paused--then went on slowly:--

"No force can turn aside one from the other,--nothing can intervene-
-not because it is either romance or reality, but simply because it
is a law. You understand?"

I bent my head silently.

"It may be thousands of years before such a meeting is
consummated,"--he continued--"For thousands of years are but hours
in the eternal countings. Yet in those thousands of years what lives
must be lived!--what lessons must be learned!--what sins committed
and expiated!--what precious time lost or found!--what happiness
missed or wasted!"

His voice thrilled--and again he took my hand and held it gently
clasped.

"You must believe in yourself alone,"--he said,--"if any lurking
thought suggests a disbelief in me! It is quite natural that you
should doubt me a little. You have studied long and deeply--you have
worked hard at problems which puzzle the strongest man's brain, and
you have succeeded in many things because you have kept what most
men manage to lose when grappling with Science,--Faith. You have
always studied with an uplifted heart--uplifted towards the things
unseen and eternal. But it has been a lonely heart, too,--as lonely
as mine!"

A moment's silence followed,--a silence that seemed heavy and dark,
like a passing cloud, and instinctively I looked up to see if indeed
a brooding storm was not above us. A heaven of splendid colour met
my gaze--the whole sky was lighted with a glory of gold and blue.
But below this flaming radiance there was a motionless mass of grey
vapour, hanging square as it seemed across the face of the lofty
mountain at the head of the lake, like a great canvas set ready for
an artist's pencil and prepared to receive the creation of his
thought. I watched this in a kind of absorbed fascination, conscious
that the warm hand holding mine had strengthened its close grasp,--
when suddenly something sharp and brilliant, like the glitter of a
sword or a forked flash of lightning, passed before my eyes with a
dizzying sensation, and the lake, the mountains, the whole
landscape, vanished like a fleeting mirage, and in all the visible
air only the heavy curtain of mist remained. I made an effort to
move--to speak--in vain! I thought some sudden illness must have
seized me--yet no!--for the half-swooning feeling that had for a
moment unsteadied my nerves had already passed--and I was calm
enough. Yet I saw more plainly than I have ever seen anything in
visible Nature, a slowly moving, slowly passing panorama of scenes
and episodes that presented themselves in marvellous outline and
colouring,--pictures that were gradually unrolled and spread out to
my view on the grey background of that impalpable mist which like a
Shadow hung between myself and impenetrable Mystery, and I realised
to the full that an eternal record of every life is written not only
in sound, but in light, in colour, in tune, in mathematical
proportion and harmony,--and that not a word, not a thought, not an
action is forgotten!

A vast forest rose before me. I saw the long shadows of the leafy
boughs flung thick upon the sward and the wild tropical vines
hanging rope-like from the intertwisted stems. A golden moon looked
warmly in between the giant branches, flooding the darkness of the
scene with rippling radiance, and within its light two human beings
walked,--a man and woman--their arms round each other,--their faces
leaning close together. The man seemed pleading with his companion
for some favour which she withheld, and presently she drew herself
away from him altogether with a decided movement of haughty
rejection. I could not see her face,--but her attire was regal and
splendid, and on her head there shone a jewelled diadem. Her lover
stood apart for a moment with bent head--then he threw himself on
his knees before her and caught her hand in an evident outburst of
passionate entreaty. And while they stood thus together, I saw the
phantom-like figure of another woman moving towards them--she came
directly into the foreground of the picture, her white garments
clinging round her, her fair hair flung loosely over her shoulders,
and her whole demeanour expressing eagerness and fear. As she
approached, the man sprang up from his knees and, with a gesture of
fury, drew a dagger from his belt and plunged it into her heart! I
saw her reel back from the blow--I saw the red blood well up through
the whiteness of her clothing, and as she turned towards her
murderer, with a last look of appeal, I recognised MY OWN FACE IN
HERS!--and in his THE FACE OF SANTORIS! I uttered a cry,--or thought
I uttered it--a darkness swept over me--and the vision vanished!

                         *     *     *
                            *     *
                               *

Another vivid flash struck my eyes, and I found myself looking upon
the crowded thoroughfares of a great city. Towers and temples,
palaces and bridges, presented themselves to my gaze in a network of
interminable width and architectural splendour, moving and swaying
before me like a wave glittering with a thousand sparkles uplifted
to the light. Presently this unsteadiness of movement resolved
itself into form and order, and I became, as it were, one unobserved
spectator among thousands, of a scene of picturesque magnificence.
It seemed that I stood in the enormous audience hall of a great
palace, where there were crowds of slaves, attendants and armed
men,--on all sides arose huge pillars of stone on which were carved
the winged heads of monsters and fabulous gods,--and looming out of
the shadows I saw the shapes of four giant Sphinxes which guarded a
throne set high above the crowd. A lambent light played quiveringly
on the gorgeous picture, growing more and more vivid as I looked,
and throbbing with colour and motion,--and I saw that on the throne
there sat a woman crowned and veiled,--her right hand held a sceptre
blazing with gold and gems. Slaves clad in costumes of the richest
workmanship and design abased themselves on either side of her, and
I heard the clash of brazen cymbals and war-like music, as the crowd
of people surged and swayed, and murmured and shouted, all
apparently moved by some special excitement or interest. Suddenly I
perceived the object on which the general attention was fixed--the
swooning body of a man, heavily bound in chains and lying at the
foot of the throne. Beside him stood a tall black slave, clad in
vivid scarlet and masked,--this sinister-looking creature held a
gleaming dagger uplifted ready to strike,--and as I saw this, a wild
yearning arose in me to save the threatened life of the bound and
helpless victim. If I could only rush to defend and drag him away
from impending peril, I thought!--but no!--I was forced to stand
helplessly watching the scene, with every fibre of my brain burning
with pent-up anguish. At this moment, the crowned and veiled woman
on the throne suddenly rose and stood upright,--with a commanding
gesture she stretched out her glittering sceptre--the sign was
given! Swiftly the dagger gleamed through the air and struck its
deadly blow straight home! I turned away my eyes in shuddering
horror,--but was compelled by some invincible power to raise them
again,--and the scene before me glowed red as with the hue of blood-
-I saw the slain victim,--the tumultuous crowd--and above all, the
relentless Queen who, with one movement of her little hand, had
swept away a life,--and as I looked upon her loathingly, she threw
back her shrouding golden veil. MY OWN FACE LOOKED FULL AT ME from
under the jewelled arch of her sparkling diadem--ah, wicked soul!--I
wildly cried--pitiless Queen!--then, as they lifted the body of the
murdered man, his livid countenance was turned towards me, and I saw
again the face of Santoris! Dumb and despairing I sank as it were
within myself, chilled with inexplicable misery, and I heard for the
first time in this singular pageant of vision a Voice--slow, calm,
and thrilling with infinite sadness:

"A life for a life!"--it said--"The old eternal law!--a life for a
life! There is nothing taken which shall not be returned again--
nothing lost which shall not be found--a life for a life!"

Then came silence and utter darkness.

                         *     *     *
                            *     *
                               *

Slowly brightening, slowly widening, a pale radiance like the
earliest glimmer of dawn stole gently on my eyes when I again raised
them. I saw the waving curve of a wide, sluggishly flowing river,
and near it a temple of red granite stood surrounded with shadowing
foliage and bright clumps of flowers. Huge palms lifted their
fronded heads to the sky, and on the edge of the quiet stream there
loitered a group of girls and women. One of these stood apart, sad
and alone, the others looking at her with something of pity and
scorn. Near her was a tall upright column of black basalt, as it
seemed, bearing the sculptured head of a god. The features were calm
and strong and reposeful, expressive of dignity, wisdom and power.
And as I looked, more people gathered together--I heard strains of
solemn music pealing from the temple close by--and I saw the
solitary woman draw herself farther apart and almost disappear among
the shadows. The light grew brighter in the east,--the sun shot a
few advancing rays upward,--suddenly the door of the temple was
thrown open, and a long procession of priests carrying flaming
tapers and attended by boys in white garments and crowned with
flowers made their slow and stately way towards the column with the
god-like Head upon it and began to circle round it, chanting as they
walked, while the flower-crowned boys swung golden censers to and
fro, impregnating the air with rich perfume. The people all knelt--
and still the priests paced round and round, chanting and murmuring
prayers,--till at last the great sun lifted the edge of its glowing
disc above the horizon, and its rays springing from the east like
golden arrows, struck the brow of the Head set on its basalt
pedestal. With the sudden glitter of this morning glory the chanting
ceased,--the procession stopped; and one priest, tall and commanding
of aspect, stepped forth from the rest, holding up his hands to
enjoin silence. And then the Head quivered as with life,--its lips
moved--there was a rippling sound like the chord of a harp smitten
by the wind,--and a voice, full, sweet and resonant, spoke aloud the
words:--

"I face the Sunrise!"

With a shout of joy priests and people responded:

"We face the Sunrise!"

And he who seemed the highest in authority, raising his arms
invokingly towards heaven, exclaimed:

"Even so, O Mightiest among the Mighty, let us ever remember that
Thy Shadow is but part of Thy Light,--that Sorrow is but the passing
humour of Joy--and that Death is but the night which dawns again
into Life! We face the Sunrise!"

Then all who were assembled joined in singing a strange half-
barbaric song and chorus of triumph, to the strains of which they
slowly moved off and disappeared like shapes breathed on a mirror
and melting away. Only the tall high priest remained,--and he stood
alone, waiting, as it were, for something eagerly expected and
desired. And presently the woman who had till now remained hidden
among the shadows of the surrounding trees, came swiftly forward.
She was very pale--her eyes shone with tears--and again I saw MY OWN
FACE IN HERS. The priest turned quickly to greet her, and I
distinctly heard every word he spoke as he caught her hands in his
own and drew her towards him.

"Everything in this world and the next I will resign," he said--"for
love of thee! Honour, dignity and this poor earth's renown I lay at
thy feet, thou most beloved of women! What other thing created or
imagined can be compared to the joy of thee?--to the sweetness of
thy lips, the softness of thy bosom--the love that trembles into
confession with thy smile! Imprison me but in thine arms and I will
count my very soul well lost for an hour of love with thee! Ah, deny
me not!--turn me not away from thee again!--love comes but once in
life--such love as ours!--early or late, but once!"

She looked at him with tender passion and pity--a look in which I
thankfully saw there was no trace of pride, resentment or affected
injury.

"Oh, my beloved!" she answered, and her voice, plaintive and sweet,
thrilled on the silence like a sob of pain--"Why wilt thou rush on
destruction for so poor a thing as I am? Knowest thou not, and wilt
thou not remember that, to a priest of thy great Order, the love of
woman is forbidden, and the punishment thereof is death? Already the
people view thee with suspicion and me with scorn--forbear, O
dearest, bravest soul!--be strong!"

"Strong?" he echoed--"Is it not strong to love?--ay, the very best
of strength! For what avails the power of man if he may not bend a
woman to his will? Child, wherever love is there can be no death,
but only life! Love is as the ever-flowing torrent of eternity in my
veins--the pulse of everlasting youth and victory! What are the
foolish creeds of man compared with this one Truth of Nature--Love!
Is not the Deity Himself the Supreme Lover?--and wouldst thou have
me a castaway from His holiest ordinance? Ah no!--come to me, my
beloved!--soul of my soul--inmost core of my heart! Come to me in
the silence when no one sees and no one hears--come when--"

He broke off, checked by her sudden smile and look of rapture. Some
thought had evidently, like a ray of light, cleared her doubts away.

"So be it!" she said--"I give thee all myself from henceforth!--I
will come!"

He uttered an exclamation of relief and joy, and drew her closer,
till her head rested on his breast and her loosened hair fell in a
shower across his arms.

"At last!" he murmured--"At last! Mine--all mine this tender soul,
this passionate heart!--mine this exquisite life to do with as I
will! O crown of my best manhood!--when wilt thou come to me?"

She answered at once without hesitation.

"To-night!" she said--"To-night, when the moon rises, meet me here
in this very place,--this sacred grove where Memnon hears thy vows
to him broken, and my vows consecrated to thee!--and as I live I
swear I will be all thine! But now--leave me to pray!"

She lifted her head and looked into his adoring eyes,--then kissed
him with a strange, grave tenderness as though bidding him farewell,
and with a gentle gesture motioned him away. Elated and flushed with
joy, he obeyed her sign, and left her, disappearing in the same
phantom-like way in which all the other figures in this weird dream-
drama had made their exit. She watched him go with a wistful
yearning gaze--then in apparent utter desperation she threw herself
on her knees before the impassive Head on its rocky pedestal and
prayed aloud:

"O hidden and unknown God whom we poor earthly creatures symbolise!-
-give me the strength to love unselfishly--the patience to endure
uncomplainingly! Thou, Heart of Stone, temper with thy coldest
wisdom my poor throbbing heart of flesh! Help me to quell the
tempest in my soul, and let me be even as thou art--inflexible,
immovable,--save when the sun strikes music from thy dreaming brows
and tells thee it is day! Forgive, O great God, forgive the fault of
my beloved!--a fault which is not his, but mine, merely because I
live and he hath found me fair,--let all be well for him,--but for
me let nothing evermore be either well or ill--and teach me--even
me--to face the Sunrise!"

Her voice ceased--a mist came before me for a moment--and when this
cleared, the same scene was presented to me under the glimmer of a
ghostly moon. And she who looked so like myself, lay dead at the
foot of the great Statue, her hands clasped on her breast, her eyes
closed, her mouth smiling as in sleep, while beside her raved and
wept her priestly lover, invoking her by every tender name, clasping
her lifeless body in his arms, covering her face with useless
passionate kisses, and calling her back with wild grief from the
silence into which her soul had fled. And I knew then that she had
put all thought of self aside in a sense of devotion to duty,--she
had chosen what she imagined to be the only way out of difficulty,--
to save the honour of her lover she had slain herself. But--was it
wise? Or foolish? This thought pressed itself insistently home to my
mind. She had given her life to serve a mistaken creed,--she had
bowed to the conventions of a temporary code of human law--yet--
surely God was above all strange and unnatural systems built up by
man for his own immediate convenience, vanity or advantage, and was
not Love the nearest thing to God? And if those two souls were
destined lovers, COULD they be divided, even by their own rashness?
These questions were curiously urged upon my inward consciousness as
I looked again upon the poor fragile corpse among the reeds and
palms of the sluggishly flowing river, and heard the clamorous
despair of the man to whom she might have been joy, inspiration and
victory had not the world been then as it is not now--the man, who
as the light of the moonbeams fell upon him, showed me in his
haggard and miserable features the spectral likeness of Santoris.
Was it right, I asked myself, that the two perfect lines of a mutual
love should be swept asunder?--or if it was, as some might conceive
it, right according to certain temporary and conventional views of
'rightness.' was it POSSIBLE to so sever them? Would it not be well
if we all occasionally remembered that there is an eternal law of
harmony between souls as between spheres?--and that if we ourselves
bring about a divergence we also bring about discord? And again,--
that if discord results by our inter-meddling, it is AGAINST THE
LAW, and must by the working of natural forces be resolved into
concord again, whether such resolvance take ten, a hundred, a
thousand or ten thousand years? Of what use, then, is the struggle
we are for ever making in our narrow and limited daily lives to
resist the wise and holy teaching of Nature? Is it not best to yield
to the insistence of the music of life while it sounds in our ears?
For everything must come round to Nature's way in the end--her way
being God's way, and God's way the only way! So I thought, as in
half-dreaming fashion I watched the vision of the dead woman and her
despairing lover fade into the impenetrable shadows of mystery
veiling the record of the light beyond.

                         *     *     *
                            *     *
                               *

Presently I became conscious of a deep murmuring sound tike the
subdued hum of many thousands of voices,--and lifting my eyes I saw
the wide circular sweep of a vast arena crowded with people. In the
centre, and well to the front of the uplifted tiers of seats, there
was a gorgeous pavilion of gold, draped with gaudy coloured silk and
hung with festoons of roses, wherein sat a heavily-built, brutish-
looking man royally robed and crowned, and wearing jewels In such
profusion as to seem literally clothed in flashing points of light.
Beautiful women were gathered round him,--boys with musical
instruments crouched at his feet--attendants stood on every hand to
minister to his slightest call or signal,--and all eyes were fixed
upon him as upon some worshipped god of a nation's idolatry. I felt
and knew that I was looking upon the 'shadow-presentment' of the
Roman tyrant Nero; and I wondered vaguely how it chanced that he, in
all the splendour of his wild and terrible career of wickedness,
should be brought into this phantasmagoria of dream in which I and
One Other alone seemed to be chiefly concerned. There were strange
noises in my ears,--the loud din of trumpets--the softer sound of
harps played enchantingly in some far-off distance--the ever-
increasing loud buzzing of the voices of the multitude--and then all
at once the roar as of angry wild beasts in impatience or pain. The
time of this vision seemed to be late afternoon--I thought I could
see a line of deep rose colour in a sky where the sun had lately
set--the flare of torches glimmered all round the arena and beyond
it, striking vivid brilliancy from the jewels on Nero's breast and
throwing into strong relief the groups of soldiers and people
immediately around him. I perceived now that the centre of the
arena, previously empty, had become the one spot on which the looks
of the people began to turn--one woman stood there all alone, clad
in white, her arms crossed on her breast. So still was she,--so
apparently unconscious of her position, that the mob, ever irritated
by calmness, grew suddenly furious, and a fierce cry arose:--"Ad
leones! Ad leones!" The great Emperor stirred from his indolent,
half-reclining position and leaned forward with a sudden look of
interest on his lowering features,--and as he did so a man attired
in the costume of a gladiator entered the arena from one of its side
doors and with a calm step and assured demeanour walked up to the
front of the royal dais and there dropped on one knee. Then quickly
rising he drew himself erect and waited, his eyes fixed on the woman
who stood as immovably as a statue, apparently resigned to some
untoward fate. And again the vast crowd shouted "Ad leones! Ad
leones!" There came a heavy grating noise of drawn bolts and bars--
the sound of falling chains--then a savage animal roar--and two lean
and ferocious lions sprang into the arena, lashing their tails,
their manes bristling and their eyes aglare. Quick as thought, the
gladiator stood in their path--and I swiftly recognised the nature
of the 'sport' that had brought the Emperor and all this brave and
glittering show of humanity out to watch what to them was merely a
'sensation'--the life of a Christian dashed out by the claws and
fangs of wild beasts--a common pastime, all unchecked by either the
mercy of man or the intervention of God! I understood as clearly as
if the explanation had been volunteered to me in so many words, that
the woman who awaited her death so immovably had only one chance of
rescue, and that chance was through the gladiator, who, to please
the humour of the Emperor, had been brought hither to combat and
frighten them off their intended victim,--the reward for him, if he
succeeded, being the woman herself. I gazed with aching, straining
eyes on the wonderful dream-spectacle, and my heart thrilled as I
saw one of the lions stealthily approach the solitary martyr and
prepare to spring. Like lightning, the gladiator was upon the
famished brute, fighting it back in a fierce and horrible contest,
while the second lion, pouncing forward and bent on a similar
attack, was similarly repulsed. The battle between man and beasts
was furious, prolonged and terrible to witness--and the excitement
became intense. "Ad leones! Ad leones!" was now the universal wild
shout, rising ever louder and louder into an almost frantic clamour.
The woman meanwhile never stirred from her place--she might have
been frozen to the ground where she stood. She appeared to notice
neither the lions who were ready to devour her, nor the gladiator
who combated them in her defence--and I studied her strangely
impassive figure with keen interest, waiting to see her face,--for I
instinctively felt I should recognise it. Presently, as though in
response to my thought, she turned towards me,--and as in a mirror I
saw MY OWN REFLECTED PERSONALITY again as I had seen it so many
times in this chain of strange episodes with which I was so
singularly concerned though still an outside spectator. Between her
Shadow-figure and what I felt of my own existing Self there seemed
to be a pale connecting line of light, and all my being thrilled
towards her with a curiously vague anxiety. A swirling mist came
before my eyes suddenly,--and when this cleared I saw that the
combat was over--the lions lay dead and weltering in their blood on
the trampled sand of the arena, and the victorious gladiator stood
near their prone bodies triumphant, amid the deafening cheers of the
crowd. Wreaths of flowers were tossed to him from the people, who
stood up in their seats all round the great circle to hail him with
their acclamations, and the Emperor, lifting his unwieldy body from
under his canopy of gold, stretched out his hand as a sign that the
prize which the dauntless combatant had fought to win was his. He at
once obeyed the signal;--but now the woman, hitherto so passive and
immovable, stirred. Fixing upon the gladiator a glance of the
deepest reproach and anguish, she raised her arms warningly as
though forbidding him to approach her--and then fell face forward on
the ground. He rushed to her side, and kneeling down sought to lift
her;--then suddenly he sprang erect with a loud cry:--

"Great Emperor! I asked of thee a living love!--and this is dead!"

A ripple of laughter ran through the crowd. The Emperor leaned
forward from his throne and smiled.

"Thank your Christian God for that!" he said--"Our pagan deities are
kinder! They give us love for love!"

The gladiator gave a wild gesture of despair and turned his face
upward to the light--THE FACE OF SANTORIS!

"Dead!--dead!"--he cried--"Of what use then is life? Dark are the
beloved eyes!--cold is the generous heart!--the fight has been in
vain--my victory mocks me with its triumph! The world is empty!"

Again the laughter of the populace stirred the air.

"Go to, man!"--and the rough voice of Nero sounded harshly above the
murmurous din--"The world was never the worse for one woman the
less! Wouldst thou also be a Christian? Take heed! Our lions are
still hungry! Thy love is dead, 'tis true, but WE have not killed
her! She trusted in her God, and He has robbed thee of thy lawful
possession. Blame Him, not us! Go hence, with thy laurels bravely
won! Nero commends thy prowess!"

He flung a purse of gold at the gladiator's feet--and then I saw the
whole scene melt away into a confused mass of light and colour till
all was merely a pearl-grey haze floating before my eyes. Yet I was
hardly allowed a moment's respite before another scene presented
itself like a painting upon the curtain of vapour which hung so
persistently in front of me--a scene which struck a closer chord
upon my memory than any I had yet beheld.

                         *     *     *
                            *     *
                               *

The cool, spacious interior of a marble-pillared hall or studio
slowly disclosed itself to my view--it was open to an enchanting
vista of terraced gardens and dark undulating woods, and gay
parterres of brilliant blossom were spread in front of it like a
wonderfully patterned carpet of intricate and exquisite design.
Within it was all the picturesque grace and confusion of an artist's
surroundings; and at a great easel, working assiduously, was one who
seemed to be the artist himself, his face turned from me towards his
canvas. Posed before him, in an attitude of indolent grace, was a
woman, arrayed in clinging diaphanous drapery, a few priceless
jewels gleaming here and there like stars upon her bosom and arms--
her hair, falling in loose waves from a band of pale blue velvet
fastened across it, was of a warm brown hue like an autumn leaf with
the sun upon it, and I could see that whatever she might be
according to the strictest canons of beauty, the man who was
painting her portrait considered her more than beautiful. I heard
his voice, in the low, murmurous yet perfectly distinct way in which
all sounds were conveyed to me in this dream pageant--it was exactly
as if persons on the stage were speaking to an audience.

"If we could understand each other,"--he said--"I think all would be
well with us in time and eternity!"

There was a pause. The picturesque scene before me seemed to glow
and gather intensity as I gazed.

"If you could see what is in my heart,"--he continued--"you would be
satisfied that no greater love was ever given to woman than mine for
you! Yet I would not say I give it to you--for I have striven
against it." He paused--and when he spoke again his words were so
distinct that they seemed close to my ears.

"It has been wrung out of my very blood and soul--I can no more
resist it than I can resist the force of the air by which I live and
breathe. I ought not to love you,--you are a joy forbidden to me--
and yet I feel, rightly speaking, that you are already mine--that
you belong to me as the other half of myself, and that this has been
so from the beginning when God first ordained the mating of souls. I
tell you I FEEL this, but cannot explain it,--and I grasp at you as
my one hope of joy!--I cannot let you go!"

She was silent, save for a deep sigh that stirred her bosom under
its folded lace and made her jewels sparkle like sunbeams on the
sea.

"If I lose you now, having known and loved you," he went on--"I lose
my art. Not that this would matter--"

Her voice trembled on the air.

"It would matter a great deal"--she said, softly--"to the world!"

"The world!" he echoed--"What need I care for it? Nothing seems of
value to me where you are not--I am nerveless, senseless, hopeless
without you. My inspiration--such as it is--comes from you--"

She moved restlessly--her face was turned slightly away so that I
could not see it.

"My inspiration comes from you,"--he repeated--"The tender look of
your eyes fills me with dreams which might--I do not say would--
realise themselves in a life's renown--but all this is perhaps
nothing to you. What, after all, can I offer you? Nothing but love!
And here in Florence you could command more lovers than there are
days in the week, did you choose--but people say you are untouchable
by love even at its best. Now I--"

Here he stopped abruptly and laid down his brush, looking full at
her.

"I," he continued--"love you at neither best nor worst, but simply
and entirely with all of myself--all that a man can be in passionate
heart, soul and body!"

(How the words rang out! I could have sworn they were spoken close
beside me and not by dream-voices in a dream!)

"If you loved me--ah God!--what that would mean! If you dared to
brave everything--if you had the courage of love to break down all
barriers between yourself and me!--but you will not do this--the
sacrifice would be too great--too unusual--"

"You think it would?"

The question was scarcely breathed. A look of sudden amazement
lightened his face--then he replied, gently--

"I think it would! Women are impulsive,--generous to a fault--they
give what they afterwards regret--who can blame them! You have much
to lose by such a sacrifice as I should ask of you--I have all to
gain. I must not be selfish. But I love you!--and your love would be
to more than the hope of Heaven!"

And now strange echoes of a modern poet's rhyme became mingled in my
dream:

   "You have chosen and clung to the chance they sent you--
     Life sweet as perfume and pure as prayer,
    But will it not one day in heaven repent you?
     Will they solace you wholly, the days that were?
    Will you lift up your eyes between sadness and bliss,
    Meet mine and see where the great love is?
    And tremble and turn and be changed?--Content you;
     The gate is strait; I shall not be there.

    Yet I know this well; were you once sealed mine,
     Mine in the blood's beat, mine in the breath,
    Mixed into me as honey in wine,
     Not time that sayeth and gainsayeth,
    Nor all strong things had severed us then,
    Not wrath of gods nor wisdom of men,
    Nor all things earthly nor all divine,
     Nor joy nor sorrow, nor life nor death!"

I watched with a deepening thrill of anxiety the scene in the
studio, and my thoughts centred themselves upon the woman who sat
there so quietly, seeming all unmoved by the knowledge that she held
a man's life and future fame in her hands. The artist took up his
palette and brushes again and began to work swiftly, his hand
trembling a little.

"You have my whole confession now!"--he said--"You know that you are
the eyes of the world to me--the glory of the sun and the moon! All
my art is in your smile--all my life responds to your touch. Without
you I am--can be nothing--Cosmo de Medicis--"

At this name a kind of shadow crept upon the scene, together with a
sense of cold.

"Cosmo de Medicis"--he repeated, slowly--"my patron, would scarcely
thank me for the avowals I have made to his fair ward!--one whom he
intends to honour with his own alliance. I am here by his order to
paint the portrait of his future bride!--not to look at her with the
eyes of a lover. But the task is too difficult--"

A little sound escaped her, like a smothered cry of pain. He turned
towards her.

"Something in your face,"--he said--"a touch of longing in your
sweet eyes, has made me risk telling you all, so that you may at
least choose your own way of love and life--for there is no real
life without love."

Suddenly she rose and confronted him--and once again, as in a magic
mirror, I saw MY OWN REFLECTED PERSONALITY. There were tears in her
eyes,--yet a smile quivered on her mouth.

"My beloved!"--she said--and then paused, as if afraid.

A look of wonder and rapture came on his face like the light of
sunrise, and I RECOGNISED THE NOW FAMILIAR FEATURES OF SANTORIS!
Very gently he laid down his palette and brushes and stood waiting
in a kind of half expectancy, half doubt.

"My beloved!" she repeated--"Have you not seen?--do you not know? O
my genius!--my angel!--am I so hard to read?--so difficult to win?"

Her voice broke in a sob--she made an uncertain step forward, and he
sprang to meet her.

"I love you, love you!"--she cried, passionately--"Let the whole
world forsake me, if only you remain! I am all yours!--do with me as
you will!"

He caught her in his arms--straining her to his heart with all the
passion of a long-denied lover's embrace--their lips met--and for a
brief space they were lost in that sudden and divine rapture that
comes but once in a lifetime,--when like a shivering sense of cold
the name again was whispered:

"Cosmo de Medicis!"

A shadow fell across the scene, and a woman, dark and heavy-
featured, stood like a blot in the sunlit brightness of the studio,-
-a woman very richly attired, who gazed fixedly at the lovers with
round, suspicious eyes and a sneering smile. The artist turned and
saw her--his face changed from joy to a pale anxiety--yet, holding
his love with one arm, he flung defiance at her with uplifted head
and fearless demeanour.

"Spy!"--he exclaimed--"Do your worst! Let us have an end of your
serpent vigilance and perfidy!--better death than the constant sight
of you! What! Have you not watched us long enough to make discovery
easy? Do your worst, I say, and quickly!"

The cruel smile deepened on the woman's mouth,--she made no answer,
but simply raised her hand. In immediate obedience to the signal, a
man, clad in the Florentine dress of the sixteenth century, and
wearing a singular collar of jewels, stepped out from behind a
curtain, attended by two other men, who, by their dress, were, or
seemed to be, of inferior rank. Without a word, these three threw
themselves upon the unarmed and defenceless painter with the fury of
wild animals pouncing on prey. There was a brief and breathless
struggle--three daggers gleamed in air--a shriek rang through the
stillness--another instant and the victim lay dead, stabbed to the
heart, while she who had just clung to his living body and felt the
warmth of his living lips against hers, dropped on her knees beside
the corpse with wild waitings of madness and despair.

"Another crime on your soul, Cosmo de Medicis!"--she cried--"Another
murder of a nobler life than your own!--may Heaven curse you for it!
But you have not parted my love from me--no!--you have but united us
for ever! We escape you and your spies--thus!"

And snatching a dagger from the hand of one of the assassins before
he could prevent her, she plunged it into her own breast. She fell
without a groan, self-slain,--and I saw, as in a mist of breath on a
mirror, the sudden horror on the faces of the men and the one woman
who were left to contemplate the ghastly deed they had committed.
And then--noting as in some old blurred picture the features of the
man who wore the collar of jewels, I felt that I knew him--yet I
could not place him in any corner of my immediate recognition.
Gradually this strange scene of cool white marble vastness with its
brilliant vista of flowers and foliage under the bright Italian sky,
and the betrayed lovers lying dead beside each other in the presence
of their murderers, passed away like a floating cloud,--and the same
slow, calm Voice I had heard once before now spoke again in sad,
stern accents:

"Jealousy is cruel as the grave!--the coals thereof are coals of
fire which hath a most vehement flame! Many waters cannot quench
love, neither can the floods drown it--if a man would give all his
substance for love it would be utterly contemned!"

                         *     *     *
                            *     *
                               *

I closed my eyes,--or thought I closed them--a vague terror was
growing upon me,--a terror of myself and a still greater terror of
the man beside me who held my hand,--yet something prevented me from
turning my head to look at him, and another still stronger emotion
possessed me with a force so overpowering that I could hardly
breathe under the weight and pain of it, but I could give it no
name. I could not think at all--and I had ceased even to wonder at
the strangeness and variety of these visions or dream-episodes full
of colour and sound which succeeded each other so swiftly. Therefore
it hardly seemed remarkable to me when I saw the heavy curtain of
mist which hung in front of my eyes suddenly reft asunder in many
places and broken into a semblance of the sea.

                         *     *     *
                            *     *
                               *

A wild sea! Gloomily grey and grand in its onsweeping wrath, its
huge billows rose and fell like moving mountains convulsed by an
earthquake,--light and shadow combated against each other in its
dark abysmal depths and among its toppling crests of foam--I could
hear the savage hiss and boom of breakers dashing themselves to
pieces on some unseen rocky coast far away,--and my heart grew cold
with dread as I beheld a ship in full sail struggling against the
heavy onslaught of the wind on that heaving wilderness of waters,
like a mere feather lost from a sea-gull's wing. Flying along like a
hunted creature she staggered and plunged, her bowsprit dipping into
deep chasms from which she was tossed shudderingly upward again as
in light contempt, and as she came nearer and nearer into my view I
could discern some of the human beings on board--the man at the
wheel, with keen eyes peering into the gathering gloom of the storm,
his hair and face dashed with spray,--the sailors, fighting hard to
save the rigging from being torn to pieces and flung into the sea,--
then--a sudden huge wave swept her directly in front of me, and I
saw the two distinct personalities that had been so constantly
presented to me during this strange experience,--THE MAN WITH THE
FACE OF SANTORIS--THE WOMAN WITH MY OWN FACE SO TRULY REFLECTED that
I might have been looking at myself in a mirror. And just now the
resemblance to us both was made more close and striking than it had
been in any of the previous visions--that is to say, the likenesses
of ourselves were given almost as we now existed. The man held the
woman beside him closely clasped with one arm, supporting her and
himself, with the other thrown round one of the shaking masts. I saw
her look up to him with the light of a great and passionate love in
her eyes. And I heard him say:--

"The end of sorrow and the beginning of joy! You are not afraid?"

"Afraid?" And her voice had no tremor--"With you?"

He caught her closer to his heart and kissed her not once but many
times in a kind of mingled rapture and despair.

"This is death, my beloved!"--he said.

And her answer pealed out with tender certainty. "No!--not death,
but life!--and love!"

A cry went up from the sailors--a cry of heartrending agony,--a mass
of enormous billows rolling steadily on together hurled themselves
like giant assassins upon the frail and helpless vessel and engulfed
it--it disappeared with awful swiftness, like a small blot on the
ocean sucked down into the whirl of water--the vast and solemn
greyness of the sea spread over it like a pall--it was a nothing,
gone into nothingness! I watched one giant wave rise in a
crystalline glitter of dark sapphire and curl over the spot where
all that human life and human love had disappeared,--and then--there
came upon my soul a sudden sense of intense calm. The great sea
smoothed itself out before my eyes into fine ripples which dispersed
gradually into mist again--and almost I found my voice--almost my
lips opened to ask: "What means this vision of the sea?" when a
sound of music checked me on the verge of utterance--the music of
delicate strings as of a thousand harps in heaven. I listened with
every sense caught and entranced--my gaze still fixed half
unseeingly upon the heavy grey film which hung before me--that
mystic sky-canvas upon which some Divine painter had depicted in
life-like form and colour scenes which I, in a sort of dim
strangeness, recognised yet could not understand--and as I looked a
rainbow, with every hue intensified to such a burning depth of
brilliancy that its light was almost intolerably dazzling, sprang in
a perfect arch across the cloud! I uttered an involuntary cry of
rapture--for it was like no earthly rainbow I had ever seen. Its
palpitating radiance seemed to penetrate into the very core and
centre of space,--aerially delicate yet deep, each separate colour
glowed with the fervent splendour of a heaven undreamed of by mere
mortality and too glorious for mortal description. It was the
shining repentance of the storm,--the assurance of joy after sorrow-
-the passionate love of the soul rising upwards in perfect form and
beauty after long imprisonment in ice-bound depths of repression and
solitude--it was anything and everything that could be thought or
imagined of divinest promise!

My heart beat quickly--tears sprang to my eyes--and almost
unconsciously I pressed the kind, strong hand that held mine. It
trembled ever so slightly--but I was too absorbed in watching that
triumphal arch across the sky to heed the movement. By degrees the
lustrous hues began to pale very slowly, and almost imperceptibly
they grew fainter and fainter till at last all was misty grey as
before, save in one place where there were long rays of light like
the falling of silvery rain. And then came strange rapidly passing
scenes as of cloud forms constantly shifting and changing, in all of
which I discerned the same two personalities so like and yet so
unlike ourselves who were the dumb witnesses of every episode,--but
everything now passed in absolute silence--there was no mysterious
music,--the voices had ceased--all was mute.

Suddenly there came a change over the face of what I thought the
sky--the clouds were torn asunder as it were to show a breadth of
burning amber and rose, and I beheld the semblance of a great closed
Gateway barred across as with gold. Here a figure slowly shaped
itself,--the figure of a woman who knelt against the closed barrier
with hands clasped and uplifted in pitiful beseeching. So strangely
desolate and solitary was her aspect in all that heavenly brilliancy
that I could almost have wept for her, shut out as she seemed from
some mystic unknown glory. Round her swept the great circle of the
heavens--beneath her and above her were the deserts of infinite
space--and she, a fragile soul rendered immortal by quenchless fires
of love and hope and memory, hovered between the deeps of
immeasurable vastness like a fluttering leaf or flake of snow! My
heart ached for her--my lips moved unconsciously in prayer:

"O leave her not always exiled and alone!" I murmured, inwardly--
"Dear God, have pity! Unbar the gate and let her in! She has waited
so long!"

The hand holding mine strengthened its clasp,--and the warm, close
pressure sent a thrill through my veins. Almost I would have turned
to look at my companion--had I not suddenly seen the closed gateway
in the heavens begin to open slowly, allowing a flood of golden
radiance to pour out like the steady flowing of a broad stream. The
kneeling woman's figure remained plainly discernible, but seemed to
be gradually melting into the light which surrounded it. And then--
something--I know not what--shook me down from the pinnacle of
vision,--hardly aware of my own action, I withdrew my hand from my
companion's, and saw--just the solemn grandeur of Loch Coruisk, with
a deep amber glow streaming over the summit of the mountains, flung
upward by the setting sun! Nothing more!--I heaved an involuntary
sigh--and at last, with some little hesitation and dread, looked
full at Santoris. His eyes met mine steadfastly--he was very pale.
So we faced each other for a moment--then he said, quietly:--

"How quickly the time has passed! This is the best moment of the
sunset,--when that glory fades we shall have seen all!"




IX

DOUBTFUL DESTINY


His voice was calm and conventional, yet I thought I detected a
thrill of sadness in it which touched me to a kind of inexplicable
remorse, and I turned to him quickly, hardly conscious of the words
I uttered.

"Must the glory fade?"--I said, almost pleadingly--"Why should it
not remain with us?"

He did not reply at once. A shadow of something like sternness
clouded his brows, and I began to be afraid--yet afraid of what? Not
of him--but of myself, lest I should unwittingly lose all I had
gained. But then the question presented itself--What had I gained?
Could I explain it, even to myself? There was nothing in any way
tangible of which to say--"I possess this," or "I have secured
that,"--for, reducing all circumstances to a prosaic level, all that
I knew was that I had met in my present companion a man who had a
singular, almost compelling attractiveness, and with whose
personality I seemed to be familiar; also, that under some power
which he might possibly have exerted, I had in an unexpected place
and at an unexpected time seen certain visions or 'impressions'
which might or might not be the working of my own brain under a
temporary magnetic influence. I was fully aware that such things
could happen--and yet--I was not by any means sure that they had so
happened in this case. And while I was thus hurriedly trying to
think out the problem, he replied to my question.

"That depends on ourselves,"--he said--"On you perhaps more than any
other."

I looked up at him wonderingly.

"On me?" I echoed.

He smiled a little.

"Why, yes! A woman always decides."

I turned my eyes again towards the sky. Long lines of delicate pale
blue and green were now intermingled with the amber light of the
after-glow, and the whole scene was one of indescribable grandeur
and beauty.

"I wish I could understand,"--I murmured.

"Let me help you,"--he said, gently. "Possibly I can make things
clearer for you. You are just now under the spell of your own
psychic impressions and memories. You think you have seen strange
episodes--these are nothing but pictures stored far away back in the
cells of your spiritual brain, which (through the medium of your
present material brain) project on your vision not only presentments
and reflections of past scenes and events, but which also reproduce
the very words and sounds attending those scenes and events. That is
all. Loch Coruisk has shown you nothing but itself in varying
effects of light and cloud--there is no mystery here but the
everlasting mystery of Nature in which you and I play our several
parts. What you have seen or heard I do not know--for each
individual experience is and always must be different. All that I am
fully conscious of is, that our having met and our being here
together to-day is, as it were, the mending of a broken chain. But
it rests with you--and even with me--to break it once more if we
choose."

I was silent, not because I could not but because I dared not speak.
All my life seemed suddenly to hang on the point of a hair's-breadth
of possibility.

"I think,"--he continued in the same quiet voice--"that just now we
may let things take their ordinary course. You and I"--here he
paused, and impelled by some secret emotion I lifted my eyes to his.
Instinctively, and with a rush of feeling, we stretched out our
hands to each other. He clasped mine in his own, and stooping his
head kissed them tenderly. "You and I,"--he went on--"have met
before in many a phase of life and on many a plane of thought--and I
believe we know and realise this. Let us be satisfied so far--and if
destiny has anything of happiness or wisdom in store for us let us
try to assist its fulfilment and not stand in the way."

I found my voice suddenly.

"But--if others stand in the way?"--I said.

He smiled.

"Surely it will be our own fault if we allow them to assume such a
position!" he answered.

I left my hands in his another moment. The fact that he held them
gave me a sense of peace and security.

"Sometimes on a long walk through field and forest," I said, softly-
-"one may miss the nearest road home. And one is glad to be told
which path to follow--"

"Yes,"--he interrupted me--"One is glad to be told!"

His eyes were bent upon me with an enigmatical expression, half
commanding, half appealing.

"Then, will you tell me--" I began.

"All that I can!" he said, drawing me a little closer towards him--
"All that I may! And you--you must tell me--"

"I! What can I tell you?" and I smiled--"I know nothing!"

"You know one thing which is all things,"--he answered--"But for
that I must still wait."

He let go my hands and turned away, shading his eyes from the glare
of gold which now spread far and wide over the heavens, turning the
sullen waters of Loch Coruisk to a tawny orange against the black
purple of the surrounding hills.

"I see our men,"--he then said, in his ordinary tone, "They are
looking for us. We must be going."

My heart beat quickly. A longing to speak what I hardly dared to
think, was strong upon me. But some inward restraint gripped me as
with iron--and my spirit beat itself like a caged bird against its
prison bars in vain. I left my rocky throne and heather canopy with
slow reluctance, and he saw this.

"You are sorry to come away,"--he said, kindly, and with a smile--"I
can quite understand it. It is a beautiful scene."

I stood quite still, looking at him. A host of recollections began
to crowd upon me, threatening havoc to my self-control.

"Is it not something more than beautiful?" I asked, and my voice
trembled in spite of myself--"To you as well as to me?"

He met my earnest gaze with a sudden deeper light in his own eyes.

"Dear, to me it is the beginning of a new life!"--he said--"But
whether it is the same to you I cannot say. I have not the right to
think so far. Come!"

A choking sense of tears was in my throat as I moved on by his side.
Why could I not speak frankly and tell him that I knew as well as he
did that now there was no life anywhere for me where he was not?
But--had it come to this? Yes, truly!--it had come to this! Then was
it a real love that I felt, or merely a blind obedience to some
hypnotic influence? The doubt suggested itself like a whisper from
some evil spirit, and I strove not to listen. Presently he took my
hand in his as before, and guided me carefully over the slippery
boulders and stones, wet with the overflowing of the mountain
torrent and the underlying morass which warned us of its vicinity by
the quantity of bog-myrtle growing in profusion everywhere. Almost
in silence we reached the shore where the launch was in waiting for
us, and in silence we sat together in the stern as the boat cut its
swift way through little waves like molten gold and opal, sparkling
with the iridescent reflections of the sun's after-glow.

"I see Mr. Harland's yacht has returned to her moorings,"--he said,
after a while, addressing his men, "When did she come back?"

"Immediately after you left, sir,"--was the reply.

I looked and saw the two yachts--the 'Dream' and the 'Diana,'
anchored in the widest part of Loch Scavaig--the one with the
disfiguring funnels that make even the most magnificent steam yacht
unsightly as compared with a sailing vessel,--the other a perfect
picture of lightness and grace, resting like a bird with folded
wings on the glittering surface of the water. My mind was disturbed
and bewildered,--I felt that I had journeyed through immense
distances of space and cycles of time during that brief excursion to
Loch Coruisk,--and as the launch rushed onward and we lost sight of
the entrance to what for me had been a veritable Valley of Vision,
it seemed that I had lived through centuries rather than hours. One
thing, however, remained positive and real in my experience, and
this was the personality of Santoris. With each moment that passed I
knew it better--the flash of his blue eyes--his sudden fleeting
smile--the turn of his head--the very gesture of his hand,--all
these were as familiar to me as the reflection of my own face in a
mirror. And now there was no wonderment mingled with the deepening
recognition,--I found it quite natural that I should know him well,-
-indeed, it was to me evident that I had known him always. What
troubled me, however, was a subtle fear that crept insidiously
through my veins like a shuddering cold,--a terror lest something to
which I could give no name, should separate us or cause us to
misunderstand each other. For the psychic lines of attraction
between two human beings are finer than the finest gossamer and can
be easily broken and scattered even though they may or must be
brought together again after long lapses of time. But so many
opportunities had already been wasted, I thought, through some
recklessness or folly, either on his part or mine. Which of us was
to blame? I looked at him half in fear, half in appeal, as he sat in
the boat with his head turned a little aside from me,--he seemed
grave and preoccupied. A sudden thrill of emotion stirred my heart--
tears sprang to my eyes so thickly that for a moment I could
scarcely see the waves that glittered and danced on all sides like
millions of diamonds. A change had swept over my life,--a change so
great that I was hardly able to bear it. It was too swift, too
overpowering to be calmly considered, and I was glad when we came
alongside the 'Dream' and I saw Mr. Harland on deck, waiting for us
at the top of the companion ladder.

"Well!" he called to me--"Was it a good sunset?"

"Glorious!" I answered him--"Did you see nothing of it?"

"No. I slept soundly, and only woke up when Brayle came over to
explain that Catherine had taken it into her head to have a short
cruise, that he had humoured her accordingly, and that they had just
come back to anchorage."

By this time I was standing beside him, and Santoris joined us.

"So your doctor came to look after you,"--he said, with a smile--"I
thought he would not trust you out of his sight too long!"

"What do you mean by that?" asked Harland--then his face lightened
and he laughed--"Well, I must own you have been a better physician
than he for the moment--it is months since I have been so free from
pain."

"I'm very glad,"--Santoris answered--"And now would you and your
friend like to take the launch back to your own yacht, or will you
stay and dine with me?"

Mr. Harland thought a moment.

"I'm afraid we must go"--he said, at last, with obvious reluctance--
"Captain Derrick went back with Brayle. You see, Catherine is not
strong, and she has not been quite herself--and we must not leave
her alone. To-morrow, if you are willing, I should like to try a
race with our two yachts in open sea--electricity against steam!
What do you say?"

"With pleasure!" and Santoris looked amused--"But as I am sure to be
the winner, you must give me the privilege of entertaining you all
to dinner afterwards. Is that settled?" "Certainly!--you are
hospitality itself, Santoris!" and Mr. Harland shook him warmly by
the hand--"What time shall we start the race?"

"Suppose we say noon?"

"Agreed!"

We then prepared to go. I turned to Santoris and in a quiet voice
thanked him for his kindness in escorting me to Loch Coruisk, and
for the pleasant afternoon we had passed. The conventional words of
common courtesy seemed to myself quite absurd,--however, they had to
be uttered, and he accepted them with the usual conventional
acknowledgment. When I was just about to descend the companion
ladder, he asked me to wait a moment, and going down to the saloon,
brought me the bunch of Madonna lilies I had found in that special
cabin which, as he had said, was destined 'for a princess.'

"You will take these, I hope?" he said, simply.

I raised my eyes to his as I received the white blossoms from his
hand. There was something indefinable and fleeting in his
expression, and for a moment it seemed as if we had suddenly become
strangers. A sense of loss and pain affected me, such as happens
when someone to whom we are deeply attached assumes a cold and
distant air for which we can render no explanation. He turned from
me as quickly as I from him, and I descended the companion ladder
followed by Mr. Harland. In a few seconds we had put several boat-
lengths between ourselves and the 'Dream,' and a rush of foolish
tears to my eyes blurred the figure of Santoris as he lifted his cap
to us in courteous adieu. I thought Mr. Harland glanced at me a
little inquisitively, but he said nothing--and we were soon on board
the 'Diana,' where Catherine, stretched out in a deck chair, watched
our arrival with but languid interest. Dr. Brayle was beside her,
and looked up as we drew near with a supercilious smile.

"So the electric man has not quite made away with you,"--he said,
carelessly--"Miss Harland and I had our doubts as to whether we
should ever see you again!"

Mr. Harland's fuzzy eyebrows drew together in a marked frown of
displeasure.

"Indeed!" he ejaculated, drily--"Well, you need have had no fears on
that score. The 'electric man,' as you call Mr. Santoris, is an
excellent host and has no sinister designs on his friends."

"Are you quite sure of that?" and Brayle, with an elaborate show of
courtesy, set chairs for his patron and for me near Catherine--
"Derrick tells me that the electric appliances on board his yacht
are to him of a terrifying character and that he would not risk
passing so much as one night on such a vessel!"

Mr. Harland laughed.

"I must talk to Derrick,"--he said--then, approaching his daughter,
he asked her kindly if she was better. She replied in the
affirmative, but with some little pettishness.

"My nerves are all unstrung,"--she said--"I think that friend of
yours is one of those persons who draw all vitality out of everybody
else. There are such people, you know, father!--people who, when
they are getting old and feeble, go about taking stores of fresh
life out of others."

He looked amused.

"You are full of fancies, Catherine,"--he said--"And no logical
reasoning will ever argue you out of them. Santoris is all right.
For one thing, he gave me great relief from pain to-day."

"Ah! How was that?"--and Brayle looked up sharply with sudden
interest.

"I don't know how,"--replied Harland,--"A drop or two of harmless-
looking fluid worked wonders for me--and in a few moments I felt
almost well. He tells me my illness is not incurable."

A curious expression difficult to define flitted over Brayle's face.

"You had better take care," he said, curtly--"Invalids should never
try experiments. I'm surprised that a man in your condition should
take any drug from the hand of a stranger."

"Most dangerous!" interpolated Catherine, feebly--"How could you,
father?"

"Well, Santoris isn't quite a stranger,"--said Mr. Harland--"After
all, I knew him at college--"

"You think you knew him,"--put in Brayle--"He may not be the same
man."

"He is the same man,"--answered Mr. Harland, rather testily--"There
are no two of his kind in the world."

Brayle lifted his eyebrows with a mildly affected air of surprise.

"I thought you had your doubts--"

"Of course!--I had and have my doubts concerning everybody and
everything"--said Mr. Harland, "And I suppose I shall have them to
the end of my days. I have sometimes doubted even your good
intentions towards me."

A dark flush overspread Brayle's face suddenly, and as suddenly
paled. He laughed a little forcedly.

"I hardly think you have any reason to do so," he said.

Mr. Harland did not answer, but turning round, addressed me.

"You enjoyed yourself at Loch Coruisk, didn't you?"

"Indeed I did!" I replied, with emphasis--"It was a lovely scene!--
never to be forgotten,"

"You and Mr. Santoris would be sure to get on well together," said
Catherine, rather crossly--"'Birds of a feather,' you know!"

I smiled. I was too much taken up with my own thoughts to pay
attention to her evident ill-humour. I was aware that Dr. Brayle
watched me furtively, and with a suspicious air, and there was a
curious feeling of constraint in the atmosphere that made me feel I
had somehow displeased my hostess, but the matter seemed to me too
trifling to consider, and as soon as the conversation became general
I took the opportunity to slip away and get down to my cabin, where
I locked the door and gave myself up to the freedom of my own
meditations. They were at first bewildered and chaotic--but
gradually my mind smoothed itself out like the sea I had looked upon
in my vision,--and I began to arrange and connect the various
incidents of my strange experience in a more or less coherent form.
According to psychic consciousness I knew what they all meant,--but
according to merely material and earthly reasoning they were utterly
incomprehensible. If I listened to the explanation offered by my
inner self, it was this:--That Rafel Santoris and I had known each
other for ages,--longer than we were permitted to remember,--that
the brain-pictures, or rather soul-pictures, presented to me were
only a few selected out of thousands which equally concerned us, and
which were stored up among eternal records,--and that these few were
only recalled to remind me of circumstances which I might
erroneously think were all entirely forgotten. If, on the other
hand, I preferred to accept what would be called a reasonable and
practical solution of the enigma, I would say:--That, being
imaginative and sensitive, I had been easily hypnotised by a
stronger will than my own, and that for his amusement, or because he
had seen in me the possibility of a 'test case,' Santoris had tried
his power upon me and forced me to see whatever he chose to conjure
up in order to bewilder and perplex me. But if this were so, what
could be his object? If I were indeed an utter stranger to him, why
should he take this trouble? I found myself harassed by anxiety and
dragged between two opposing influences--one which impelled me to
yield myself to the deep sense of exquisite happiness, peace and
consolation that swept over my spirit like the touch of a veritable
benediction from heaven,--the other which pushed me back against a
hard wall of impregnable fact and bade me suspect my dawning joy as
though it were a foe.

That night we were a curious party at dinner. Never were five human
beings more oddly brought into contact and conversation with each
other. We were absolutely opposed at all points; in thought, in
feeling and in sentiment, I could not help remembering the wonderful
network of shining lines I had seen in that first dream of mine,--
lines which were apparently mathematically designed to meet in
reciprocal unity. The lines on this occasion between us five human
beings were an almost visible tangle. I found my best refuge in
silence,--and I listened in vague wonderment to the flow of
senseless small talk poured out by Dr. Brayle, apparently for the
amusement of Catherine, who on her part seemed suddenly possessed by
a spirit of wilfulness and enforced gaiety which moved her to utter
a great many foolish things, things which she evidently imagined
were clever. There is nothing perhaps more embarrassing than to hear
a woman of mature years giving herself away by the childish
vapidness of her talk, and exhibiting not only a lack of mental
poise, but also utter tactlessness. However, Catherine rattled on,
and Dr. Brayle rattled with her,--Mr. Harland threw in occasional
monosyllables, but for the most part was evidently caught in a kind
of dusty spider's web of thought, and I spoke not at all unless
spoken to. Presently I met Catherine's eyes fixed upon me with a
sort of round, half-malicious curiosity.

"I think your day's outing has done you good," she said--"You look
wonderfully well!"

"I AM well!" I answered her--"I have been well all the time."

"Yes, but you haven't looked as you look to-night," she said--"You
have quite a transformed air!"

"Transformed?"--I echoed, smiling--"In what way?"

Mr. Harland turned and surveyed me critically.

"Upon my word, I think Catherine is right!" he said--"There is
something different about you, though I cannot explain what it is!"

I felt the colour rising hotly to my face, but I endeavoured to
appear unconcerned.

"You look," said Dr. Brayle, with a quick glance from his narrowly
set eyes--"as if you had been through a happy experience."

"Perhaps I have!" I answered quietly--"It has certainly been a very
happy day!" "What is your opinion of Santoris?" asked Mr. Harland,
suddenly--"You've spent a couple of hours alone in his company,--you
must have formed some idea."

I replied at once, without taking thought.

"I think him quite an exceptional man," I said--"Good and great-
hearted,--and I fancy he must have gone through much difficult
experience to make him what he is."

"I entirely disagree with you,"--said Dr. Brayle, quickly--"I've
taken his measure, and I think it's a fairly correct one. I believe
him to be a very clever and subtle charlatan, who affects a certain
profound mysticism in order to give himself undue importance--"

There was a sudden clash. Mr. Harland had brought his clenched fist
down upon the table with a force that made the glasses ring.

"I won't have that, Brayle!" he said, sharply--"I tell you I won't
have it! Santoris is no charlatan--never was!--he won his honours at
Oxford like a man--his conduct all the time I ever knew him was
perfectly open and blameless--he did no mean tricks, and pandered to
nothing base--and if some of us fellows were frightened of him (as
we were) it was because he did everything better than we could do
it, and was superior to us all. That's the truth!--and there's no
getting over it. Nothing gives small minds a better handle for
hatred than superiority--especially when that superiority is never
asserted, but only felt."

"You surprise me,"--murmured Brayle, half apologetically--"I
thought--"

"Never mind what you thought!" said Mr. Harland, with a sudden ugly
irritation of manner that sometimes disfigured him--"Your thoughts
are not of the least importance!"

Dr. Brayle flushed angrily and Catherine looked surprised and
visibly indignant.

"Father! How can you be so rude!"

"Am I rude?" And Mr. Harland shrugged his shoulders indifferently--
"Well! I may be--but I never take a man's hospitality and permit
myself to listen to abuse of him afterwards."

"I assure you--" began Dr. Brayle, almost humbly.

"There, there! If I spoke hastily, I apologise. But Santoris is too
straightforward a man to be suspected of any dishonesty or
chicanery--and certainly no one on board this vessel shall treat his
name with anything but respect." Here he turned to me--"Will you
come on deck for a little while before bedtime, or would you rather
rest?"

I saw that he wished to speak to me, and willingly agreed to
accompany him. Dinner being well over, we left the saloon, and were
soon pacing the deck together under the light of a brilliant moon.
Instinctively we both looked towards the 'Dream' yacht,--there was
no illumination about her this evening save the usual lamp hung in
the rigging and the tiny gleams of radiance through her port-holes,-
-and her graceful masts and spars were like fine black pencillings
seen against the bare slope of a mountain made almost silver to the
summit by the singularly searching clearness of the moonbeams. My
host paused in his walk beside me to light a cigar.

"I'm sure you are convinced that Santoris is honest," he said--"Are
you not?"

"In what way should I doubt him?"--I replied, evasively--"I scarcely
know him!"

Hardly had I said this when a sudden self-reproach stung me. How
dare I say that I scarcely knew one who had been known to me for
ages? I leaned against the deck rail looking up at the violet sky,
my heart beating quickly. My companion was still busy lighting his
cigar, but when this was done to his satisfaction he resumed.

"True! You scarcely know him, but you are quick to form opinions,
and your instincts are often, though perhaps not always, correct. At
any rate, you have no distrust of him? You like him?"

"Yes,"--I answered, slowly--"I--I like him--very much."

And the violet sky, with its round white moon, seemed to swing in a
circle about me as I spoke--knowing that the true answer of my heart
was love, not liking!--that love was the magnet drawing me
irresistibly, despite my own endeavour, to something I could neither
understand nor imagine.

"I'm glad of that," said Mr. Harland--"It would have worried me a
little if you had taken a prejudice or felt any antipathy towards
him. I can see that Brayle hates him and has imbued Catherine with
something of his own dislike."

I was silent.

"He is, of course, an extraordinary man," went on Mr. Harland--"and
he is bound to offend many and to please few. He is not likely to
escape the usual fate of unusual characters. But I think--indeed I
may say I am sure--his integrity is beyond question. He has curious
opinions about love and marriage--almost as curious as the fixed
ideas he holds concerning life and death."

Something cold seemed to send a shiver through my blood--was it some
stray fragment of memory from the past that stirred me to a sense of
pain? I forced myself to speak.

"What are those opinions?" I asked, and looking up in the moonlight
to my companion's face I saw that it wore a puzzled expression--
"Hardly conventional, I suppose?"

"Conventional! Convention and Santoris are farther apart than the
poles! No--he doesn't fit into any accepted social code at all. He
looks upon marriage itself as a tacit acknowledgment of inconstancy
in love, and declares that if the passion existed in its truest form
between man and woman any sort of formal or legal tie would be
needless,--as love, if it be love, does not and cannot change. But
it is no use discussing such a matter with him. The love that he
believes in can only exist, if then, once in a thousand years! Men
and women marry for physical attraction, convenience, necessity or
respectability,--and the legal bond is necessary both for their
sakes and the worldly welfare of the children born to them; but love
which is physical and transcendental together,--love that is to last
through an imagined eternity of progress and fruition, this is a
mere dream--a chimera!--and he feasts his brain upon it as though it
were a nourishing fact. However, one must have patience with him--he
is not like the rest of us."

"No!" I murmured--and then stood silently beside him watching the
moonbeams ripple on the waters in wavy links of brightness.

"When you married," I said, at last--"did you not marry for love?"

He puffed at his cigar thoughtfully.

"Well, I hardly know," he replied, after a long pause,--"Looking
back upon everything, I rather doubt it! I married as most men
marry--on impulse. I saw a pretty face--and it seemed advisable that
I should marry--but I cannot say I was moved by any great or
absorbing passion for the woman I chose. She was charming and
amiable in our courting days--as a wife she became peevish and
querulous,--apt to sulk, too,--and she devoted herself almost
entirely to the most commonplace routine of life;--however, I had
nothing to justly complain of. We lived five years together before
her child Catherine was born,--and then she died. I cannot say that
either her life or her death left any deep mark upon me--not if I am
honest. I don't think I understand love--certainly not the love
which Rafel Santoris looks upon as the secret key of the Universe."

Instinctively my eyes turned towards the 'Dream' at anchor. She
looked like a phantom vessel in the moonlight. Again the faint
shiver of cold ran through my veins like a sense of spiritual
terror. If I should lose now what I had lost before! This was my
chief thought,--my hidden shuddering fear. Did the whole
responsibility rest with me, I wondered? Mr. Harland laid his hand
kindly on my arm.

"You look like a wan spirit in the moonbeams," he said--"So pale and
wistful! You are tired, and I am selfish in keeping you up here to
talk to me. Go down to your cabin. I can see you are full of
mystical dreams, and I am afraid Santoris has rather helped you to
indulge in them. He is of the same nature as you are--inclined to
believe that this life as we live it is only one phase of many that
are past and of many yet to come. I wish I could accept that faith!"

"I wish you could!" I said--"You surely would be happier."

"Should I?" He gave a quick sigh. "I have my doubts! If I could be
young and strong and lie through many lives always possessed of that
same youth and strength, then there would be something in it--but to
be old and ailing, no! The Faust legend is an eternal truth--Life is
only worth living as long as we enjoy it."

"Your friend Santoris enjoys it!" I said.

"Ah! There you touch me! He does enjoy it, and why? Because he is
young! Though nearly as old in years as I am, he is actually young!
That's the mystery of him! Santoris is positively young--young in
heart, young in thought, ambition, feeling and sentiment, and yet--
"

He broke off for a moment, then resumed.

"I don't know how he has managed it, but he told me long ago that it
was a man's own fault if he allowed himself to grow old. I laughed
at him then, but he has certainly carried his theories into fact. He
used to declare that it was either yourself or your friends that
made you old. 'You will find,' he said, 'as you go on in years, that
your family relations, or your professing dear friends, are those
that will chiefly insist on your inviting and accepting the burden
of age. They will remind you that twenty years ago you did so and
so,--or that they have known you over thirty years--or they will
tell you that considering your age you look well, or a thousand and
one things of that kind, as if it were a fault or even a crime to be
alive for a certain span of time,--whereas if you simply shook off
such unnecessary attentions and went your own way, taking freely of
the constant output of life and energy supplied to you by Nature,
you would outwit all these croakers of feebleness and decay and
renew your vital forces to the end. But to do this you must have a
constant aim in life and a ruling passion.' As I told you, I laughed
at him and at what I called his 'folly,' but now--well, now--it's a
case of 'let those laugh who win.'"

"And you think he has won?" I asked.

"Most assuredly--I cannot deny it. But the secret of his victory is
beyond me."

"I should think it is beyond most people," I replied--"For if we
could all keep ourselves young and strong we would take every means
in our power to attain such happiness--"

"Would we, though?" And his brows knitted perplexedly--"If we knew,
would we take the necessary trouble? We will hardly obey a
physician's orders for our good even when we are really ill--would
we in health follow any code of life in order to keep well?"

I laughed.

"Perhaps not!" I said--"I expect it will always be the same thing--
'Many are called, but few are chosen.' Goodnight!"

I held out my hand. He took it in his own and kept it a moment.

"It's curious we should have met Santoris so soon after my telling
you about him," he said--"It's one of those coincidences which one
cannot explain. You are very like him in some of your ideas--you two
ought to be very great friends."

"Ought we?"--and I smiled--"Perhaps we shall be! Again, Good-night!"

"Good-night!" And I left him to his meditations and went down to my
cabin, only stopping for a moment to say good-night to Catherine and
Dr. Brayle, who were playing bridge with Mr. Swinton and Captain
Derrick in the saloon. Once in my room, I was thankful to be alone.
Every extraneous thing seemed an intrusion or an impertinence,--the
thoughts that filled my brain were all absorbing, and went so far
beyond the immediate radius of time and space that I could hardly
follow their flight. I smiled as I imagined what ordinary people
would think of the experience through which I had passed and was
passing. 'Foolish fancies!' 'Neurotic folly!' and other epithets of
the kind would be heaped upon me if they knew--they, the excellent
folk whose sole objects in life are so ephemeral as to be the things
of the hour, the day, or the month merely, and who if they ever
pause to consider eternal possibilities at all, do so reluctantly
perhaps in church on Sundays, comfortably dismissing them for the
more solid prospect of dinner. And of Love? What view of the divine
passion do they take as a rule? Let the millions of mistaken
marriages answer! Let the savage lusts and treacheries and cruelties
of merely brutish and unspiritualised humanity bear witness? And how
few shall be found who have even the beginnings of the nature of
true love--'the love of soul for soul, angel for angel, god for
god!'--the love that accepts this world and its events as one phase
only of divine and immortal existence--a phase of trial and proving
in which the greater number fail to pass even a first examination!
As for myself, I felt and knew that _I_ had failed hopelessly and
utterly in the past--and I stood now as it were on the edge of new
circumstances--in fear, yet not without hope, and praying that
whatsoever should chance to me I might not fail again!




X

STRANGE ASSOCIATIONS


The next day the race agreed upon was run in the calmest of calm
weather. There was not the faintest breath of wind,--the sea was
still as a pond and almost oily in its smooth, motionless shining--
and it was evident at first that our captain entertained no doubt
whatever as to the 'Diana,' with her powerful engines, being easily
able to beat the aerial-looking 'Dream' schooner, which at noon-day,
with all sails spread, came gliding up beside us till she lay point
to point at equal distance and at nearly equal measurement with our
more cumbersome vessel. Mr. Harland was keenly excited; Dr. Brayle
was ready to lay any amount of wagers as to the impossibility of a
sailing vessel, even granted she was moved by electricity, out-
racing one of steam in such a dead calm. As the two vessels lay on
the still waters, the 'Diana' fussily getting up steam, and the
'Dream' with sails full out as if in a stiff breeze, despite the
fact that there was no wind, we discussed the situation eagerly--or
rather I should say my host and his people discussed it, for I had
nothing to say, knowing that the victory was sure to be with
Santoris. We were in very lonely waters,--there was room and to
spare for plenty of racing, and when all was ready and Santoris
saluted us from the deck, lifting his cap and waving it in response
to a similar greeting from Mr. Harland and our skipper, the signal
to start was given. We moved off together, and for at least half an
hour or more the 'Dream' floated along in a kind of lazy indolence,
keeping up with us easily, her canvas filled, and her keel cutting
the water as if swept by a favouring gale. The result of the race
was soon a foregone conclusion,--for presently, when well out on the
mirror-like calm of the sea, the 'Dream' showed her secret powers in
earnest, and flew like a bird with a silent swiftness that was
almost incredible. Our yacht put on all steam in the effort to keep
up with her,--in vain! On, on, with light grace and celerity her
white sails carried her like the wings of a sea-gull, and almost
before we could realise it she vanished altogether from our sight! I
saw a waste of water spread around us emptily like a wide circle of
crystal reflecting the sky, and a sense of desolation fell upon me
in the mere fact that we were temporarily left alone. We steamed on
and on in the direction of the vanished 'Dream,'--our movements
suggesting those of some clumsy four-footed animal panting its way
after a bird, but unable to come up with her.

"Wonderful!" said Mr. Harland, at last, drawing a long breath,--"I
would never have believed it possible!"

"Nor I!" agreed Captain Derrick--"I certainly thought she would
never have managed it in such a dead calm. For though I have seen
some of her mechanism I cannot entirely understand it."

Dr. Brayle was silent. It was evident that he was annoyed--though
why he should be so was not apparent. I myself was full of secret
anxiety--for the 'Dream' yacht's sudden and swift disappearance had
filled me with a wretched sense of loneliness beyond all expression.
Suppose she should not return! I had no clue to her whereabouts--and
with the loss of Santoris I knew I should lose all that was worth
having in my life. While these miserable thoughts were yet chasing
each other through my brain I suddenly caught a far glimpse of white
sails on the horizon.

"She's coming back!" I cried, enraptured, and heedless of what I
said--"Oh, thank God! She's coming back!"

They all looked at me in amazement.

"Why, what's the matter with you?" asked Mr. Harland, smiling. "You
surely didn't think she was in any danger?"

My cheeks grew warm.

"I didn't know--I could not imagine--" I faltered, and turning away
I met Dr. Brayle's eyes fixed upon me with a gleam of malice in
them.

"I'm sure," he said, suavely, "you are greatly interested in Mr.
Santoris! Perhaps you have met each other before?"

"Never!" I answered, hurriedly,--and then checked myself, startled
and confused. He kept his narrow brown eyes heedfully upon me and
smiled slightly.

"Really! I should have thought otherwise!"

I did not trouble myself to reply. The white sails of the 'Dream'
were coming nearer and nearer over the smooth width of the sunlit
water, and as she approached my heart grew warm with gratitude. Life
was again a thing of joy!--the world was no longer empty! That ship
looked to me like a beautiful winged spirit coming towards me with
radiant assurances of hope and consolation, and I lost all fear, all
sadness, all foreboding, as she gradually swept up alongside in the
easy triumph she had won. Our crew assembled to welcome her, and
cheered lustily. Santoris, standing on her deck, lightly
acknowledged the salutes which gave him the victory, and presently
both our vessels were once more at their former places of anchorage.
When all the excitement was over, I went down to my cabin to rest
for a while before dressing for the dinner on board the 'Dream' to
which we were all invited,--and while I lay on my sofa reading,
Catherine Harland knocked at my door and asked to come in, I
admitted her at once, and she flung herself into an arm-chair with a
gesture of impatience.

"I'm so tired of all this yachting!" she said, peevishly. "It isn't
amusing to me!"

"I'm very sorry!" I answered;--"If you feel like that, why not give
it up at once?"

"Oh, it's father's whim!" she said-"And if he makes up his mind
there's no moving him. One thing, however, I'm determined to do--and
that is--" Here she stopped, looking at me curiously.

I returned her gaze questioningly.

"And that is--what?"

"To get as far away as ever we can from that terrible 'Dream' yacht
and its owner!"--she replied--"That man is a devil!"

I laughed. I could not help laughing. The estimate she had formed of
one so vastly her superior as Santoris struck me as more amusing
than blamable. I am often accustomed to hear the hasty and narrow
verdict of small-minded and unintelligent persons pronounced on men
and women of high attainment and great mental ability; therefore,
that she should show herself as not above the level of the common
majority did not offend so much as it entertained me. However, my
laughter made her suddenly angry.

"Why do you laugh?" she demanded. "You look quite pagan in that lace
rest-gown--I suppose you call it a restgown!--with all your hair
tumbling loose about you! And that laugh of yours is a pagan laugh!"

I was so surprised at her odd way of speaking that for a moment I
could find no words. She looked at me with a kind of hard disfavour
in her eyes.

"That's the reason,"--she went on--"why you find life agreeable.
Pagans always did. They revelled in sunshine and open air, and found
all sorts of excuses for their own faults, provided they got some
pleasure out of them. That's quite your temperament! And they
laughed at serious things--just as you do!"

The mirror showed me my own reflection, and I saw myself still
smiling.

"Do I laugh at serious things?" I said. "Dear Miss Harland, I am not
aware of it! But I cannot take Mr. Santoris as a 'devil' seriously!"

"He is!" And she nodded her head emphatically--"And all those queer
beliefs he holds--and you hold them too!--are devilish! If you
belonged to the Church of Rome, you would not be allowed to indulge
in such wicked theories for a moment."

"Ah! The Church of Rome fortunately cannot control thought!"--I
said--"Not even the thoughts of its own children! And some of the
beliefs of the Church of Rome are more blasphemous and barbarous
than all the paganism of the ancient world! Tell me, what are my
'wicked theories'?"

"Oh, I don't know!" she replied, vaguely and inconsequently--"You
believe there's no death--and you think we all make our own
illnesses and misfortunes,--and I've heard you say that the idea of
Eternal Punishment is absurd--so in a way you are as bad as father,
who declares there's nothing in the Universe but gas and atoms--no
God and no anything. You really are quite as much of an atheist as
he is! Dr. Brayle says so."

I had been standing in front of her while she thus talked, but now I
resumed my former reclining attitude on the sofa and looked at her
with a touch of disdain.

"Dr. Brayle says so!"--I repeated--"Dr. Brayle's opinion is the
least worth having in the world! Now, if you really believe in
devils, there's one for you!"

"How can you say so?" she exclaimed, hotly--"What right have you--"

"How can he call ME an atheist?" I demanded-"What right has HE to
judge me?"

The flush died off her face, and a sudden fear filled her eyes.

"Don't look at me like that!" she said, almost in a whisper--"It
reminds me of an awful dream I had the other night!"--She paused.--
"Shall I tell it to you?"

I nodded indifferently, yet watched her curiously the while.
Something in her hard, plain face had become suddenly and
unpleasantly familiar.

"I dreamed that I was in a painter's studio watching two murdered
people die--a man and a woman. The man was like Santoris--the woman
resembled you! They had been stabbed,--and the woman was clinging to
the man's body. Dr. Brayle stood beside me also watching--but the
scene was strange to me, and the clothes we wore were all of some
ancient time. I said to Dr. Brayle: 'We have killed them!' and he
replied: 'Yes! They are better dead than living!' It was a horrible
dream!--it seemed so real! I have been frightened of you and of that
man Santoris ever since!"

I could not speak for a moment. A recollection swept over me to
which I dared not give utterance,--it seemed too improbable.

"I've had nerves," she went on, shivering a little--"and that's why
I say I'm tired of this yachting trip. It's becoming a nightmare to
me!"

I lay back on the sofa looking at her with a kind of pity.

"Then why not end it?" I said--"Or why not let me go away? It is I
who have displeased you somehow, and I assure you I'm very sorry!
You and Mr. Harland have both been most kind to me--I've been your
guest for nearly a fortnight,--that's quite sufficient holiday for
me--put me ashore anywhere you like and I'll go home and get myself
out of your way. Will that be any comfort to you?"

"I don't know that it will," she said, with a short, querulous sigh-
-"Things have happened so strangely." She paused, looking at me--
"Yes--you have the face of that woman I saw in my dream!--and you
have always reminded me of--"

I waited eagerly. She seemed afraid to go on.

"Well!" I said, as quietly as I could--"Do please finish what you
were saying!"

"It goes back to the time when I first saw you," she continued, now
speaking quickly as though anxious to get it over--"You will perhaps
hardly remember the occasion. It was at that great art and society
"crush" in London where there was such a crowd that hundreds of
people never got farther than the staircase. You were pointed out to
me as a "psychist"--and while I was still listening to what was
being said about you, my father came up with you on his arm and
introduced us. When I saw you I felt that your features were somehow
familiar,--though I could not tell where I had met you before,--and
I became very anxious to see more of you. In fact, you had a perfect
fascination for me! You have the same fascination now,--only it is a
fascination that terrifies me!"

I was silent.

"The other night," she went on--"when Mr. Santoris first came on
board I had a singular impression that he was or had been an enemy
of mine,--though where or how I could not say. It was this that
frightened me, and made me too ill and nervous to go with you on
that excursion to Loch Coruisk. And I want to get away from him! I
never had such impressions before--and even now,--looking at you,--I
feel there's something in you which is quite "uncanny,"--it troubles
me! Oh!--I'm sure you mean me no harm--you are bright and amiable
and adaptable and all that--but--I'm afraid of you!"

"Poor Catherine!" I said, very gently--"These are merely nervous
ideas! There is nothing to fear from me--no, nothing!" For here she
suddenly leaned forward and took my hand, looking earnestly in my
face--"How can you imagine such a thing possible?"

"Are you sure?" she half whispered--"When I called you "pagan" just
now I had a sort of dim recollection of a fair woman like you,--a
woman I seemed to know who was really a pagan! Yet I don't know how
I knew her, or where I met her--a woman who, for some reason or
other, was hateful to me because I was jealous of her! These curious
fancies have haunted my mind only since that man Santoris came on
board,--and I told Dr. Brayle exactly what I felt."

"And what did he say?" I asked.

"He said that it was all the work of Santoris, who was an evident
professor of psychical imposture--"

I sprang up.

"Let him say that to ME!" I exclaimed--"Let him dare to say it! and
I will prove who is the impostor to his face!"

She retreated from me with wide-open eyes of alarm.

"Why do you look at me like that?" she said. "We didn't really kill
you--except--in a dream!"

A sudden silence fell between us; something cold and shadowy and
impalpable seemed to possess the very air. If by some supernatural
agency we had been momentarily deprived of life and motion, while a
vast dark cloud, heavy with rain, had made its slow way betwixt us,
the sense of chill and depression could hardly have been greater.

Presently Catherine spoke again, with a little forced laugh.

"What silly things I say!" she murmured--"You can see for yourself
my nerves are in a bad state!--I am altogether unstrung!"

I stood for a moment looking at her, and considering the perplexity
in which we both seemed involved.

"If you would rather not dine with Mr. Santoris this evening," I
said, at last,--"and if you think his presence has a bad effect on
you, let us make some excuse not to go. I will willingly stay with
you, if you wish me to do so."

She gave me a surprised glance.

"You are very unselfish," she said--"and I wish I were not so
fanciful. It's most kind of you to offer to stay with me and to give
up an evening's pleasure--for I suppose it IS a pleasure? You like
Mr. Santoris?"

The colour rushed to my face in a warm glow.

"Yes," I answered, turning slightly away from her--"I like him very
much."

"And he likes YOU better than he likes any of us," she said--"In
fact, I believe if it had not been for you, we should never have met
him in this strange way--"

"Why, how can you make that out?" I asked, smiling. "I never heard
of him till your father spoke of him,--and never saw him till--"

"Till when?"--she demanded, quickly.

"Till the other night," I answered, hesitatingly.

She searched my face with questioning eyes.

"I thought you were going to say that you, like myself, had some
idea or recollection of having met him before," she said. "However,
I shall not ask you to sacrifice your pleasure for me,--in fact, I
have made up my mind to go to this dinner, though Dr. Brayle doesn't
wish it."

"Oh! Dr. Brayle doesn't wish it!" I echoed--"And why?"

"Well, he thinks it will not be good for me--and--and he hates the
very sight of Santoris!"

I said nothing. She rose to leave my cabin.

"Please don't think too hardly of me!" she said, pleadingly,--"I've
told you frankly just how I feel,--and you can imagine how glad I
shall be when this yachting trip comes to an end."

She went away then, and I stood for some minutes lost in thought. I
dared not pursue the train of memories with which she had connected
herself in my mind. My chief idea now was to find some convenient
method of immediately concluding my stay with the Harlands and
leaving their yacht at some easy point of departure for home. And I
resolved I would speak to Santoris on this subject and trust to him
for a means whereby we should not lose sight of each other, for I
felt that this was imperative. And my spirit rose up within me full
of joy and pride in its instinctive consciousness that I was as
necessary to him as he was to me.

It was a warm, almost sultry evening, and I was able to discard my
serge yachting dress for one of soft white Indian silk, a cooler and
more presentable costume for a dinner-party on board a yacht which
was furnished with such luxury as was the 'Dream.' My little sprig
of bell-heather still looked bright and fresh in the glass where I
always kept it--but to-night when I took it in my hand it suddenly
crumbled into a pinch of fine grey dust. This sudden destruction of
what had seemed well-nigh indestructible startled me for a moment
till I began to think that after all the little bunch of blossom had
done its work,--its message had been given--its errand completed.
All the Madonna lilies Santoris had given me were as fresh as if
newly gathered,--and I chose one of these with its companion bud as
my only ornament. When I joined my host and his party in the saloon
he looked at me with inquisitive scrutiny.

"I cannot quite make you out," he said--"You look several years
younger than you did when you came on board at Rothesay! Is it the
sea air, the sunshine, or--Santoris?"

"Santoris!" I repeated, and laughed. "How can it be Santoris?"

"Well, he makes HIMSELF young," Mr. Harland answered--"And perhaps
he may make others young too. There's no telling the extent of his
powers!"

"Quite the conjurer!" observed Dr. Brayle, drily--"Faust should have
consulted him instead of Mephistopheles!"

"'Faust' is a wonderful legend, but absurd in the fact that the old
philosopher sold his soul to the Devil, merely for the love of
woman,"--said Mr. Harland. "The joy, the sensation and the passion
of love were to him supreme temptation and the only satisfaction on
earth."

Dr. Brayle's eyes gleamed.

"But, after all, is this not a truth?" he asked--"Is there anything
that so completely dominates the life of a man as the love of a
woman? It is very seldom the right woman--but it is always a woman
of some kind. Everything that has ever been done in the world,
either good or evil, can be traced back to the influence of women on
men--sometimes it is their wives who sway their actions, but it is
far more often their mistresses. Kings and emperors are as prone to
the universal weakness as commoners,--we have only to read history
to be assured of the fact. What more could Faust desire than love?"

"Well, to me love is a mistake," said Mr. Harland, throwing on his
overcoat carelessly--"I agree with Byron's dictum 'Who loves,
raves!' Of course it should be an ideal passion--but it never is.
Come, are we all ready?"

We were--and we at once left the yacht in our own launch. Our party
consisted of Mr. Harland, his daughter, myself, Dr. Brayle and Mr.
Swinton, and with such indifferent companions I imagined it would be
difficult, if not impossible, to get even a moment with Santoris
alone, to tell him of my intention to leave my host and hostess as
soon as might be possible. However, I determined to make some effort
in this direction, if I could find even the briefest opportunity.

We made our little trip across the water from the 'Diana' to the
'Dream' in the light of a magnificent sunset. Loch Scavaig was a
blaze of burning colour,--and the skies above us were flushed with
deep rose divided by lines of palest blue and warm gold. Santoris
was waiting on the deck to receive us, attended by his captain and
one or two of the principals of the crew, but what attracted and
charmed our eyes at the moment was a beautiful dark youth of some
twelve or thirteen years of age, clad in Eastern dress, who held a
basket full of crimson and white rose petals, which, with a graceful
gesture, he silently emptied at our feet as we stepped on board. I
happened to be the first one to ascend the companion ladder, so that
it looked as if this fragrant heap of delicate leaves had been
thrown down for me to tread upon, but even if it had been so
intended it appeared as though designed for the whole party.
Santoris welcomed us with the kindly courtesy which always
distinguished his manner, and he himself escorted Miss Harland down
to one of the cabins, there to take off the numerous unnecessary
wraps and shawls with which she invariably clothed herself on the
warmest day,--I followed them as they went, and he turned to me with
a smile, saying:--

"You know your room? The same you had yesterday afternoon."

I obeyed his gesture, and entered the exquisitely designed and
furnished apartment which he had said was for a 'princess,' and
closing the door I sat down for a few minutes to think quietly. It
was evident that things were coming to some sort of crisis in my
life,--and shaping to some destiny which I must either accept or
avoid. Decisive action would rest, as I saw, entirely with myself.
To avoid all difficulty, I had only to hold my peace and go my own
way--refuse to know more of this singular man who seemed to be so
mysteriously connected with my life, and return home to the usual
safe, if dull, routine of my ordinary round of work and effort. On
the other hand, to accept the dawning joy that seemed showering upon
me like a light from Heaven, was to blindly move on into the
Unknown,--to trust unquestioningly to the secret spiritual
promptings of my own nature and to give myself up wholly and
ungrudgingly to a love which suggested all things yet promised
nothing! Full of the most conflicting thoughts, I paced the room up
and down slowly--the tall mirror reflected my face and figure and
showed me the startlingly faithful presentment of the woman I had
seen in my strange series of visions,--the woman who centuries ago
had fought against convention and custom, only to be foolishly
conquered by them in a thousand ways,--the woman who had slain love,
only that it should rise again and confront her with deathless eyes
of eternal remembrance--the woman who, drowned at last for love's
sake in a sea of wrath and trembling, knelt outside the barred gate
of Heaven praying to enter in! And in my mind I heard again the
words spoken by that sweet and solemn Voice which had addressed me
in the first of my dreams:

"One rose from all the roses in Heaven! One--fadeless and immortal--
only one, but sufficient for all! One love from all the million
loves of men and women--one, but enough for Eternity! How long the
rose has awaited its flowering--how long the love has awaited its
fulfilment--only the recording angels know! Such roses bloom but
once in the wilderness of space and time; such love comes but once
in a Universe of worlds!"

And then I remembered the parting command: "Rise and go hence! Keep
the gift God sends thee!--take that which is thine!--meet that which
hath sought thee sorrowing for many centuries! Turn not aside again,
neither by thine own will nor by the will of others, lest old errors
prevail. Pass from vision into waking!--from night to day!--from
seeming death to life!--from loneliness to love!--and keep within
thy heart the message of a Dream!"

Dared I trust to these suggestions which the worldly-wise would call
mere imagination? A profound philosopher of these latter days has
defined Imagination as 'an advanced perception of truth,' and avers
that the discoveries of the future can always be predicted by the
poet and the seer, whose receptive brains are the first to catch the
premonitions of those finer issues of thought which emanate from the
Divine intelligence. However this may be, my own experience of life
had taught me that what ordinary persons pin their faith upon as
real, is often unreal,--while such promptings of the soul as are
almost incapable of expression lead to the highest realities of
existence. And I decided at last to let matters take their own
course, though I was absolutely resolved to get away from the
Harlands within the next two or three days. I meant to ask Mr.
Harland to land me at Portree, where I could take the steamer for
Glasgow;--any excuse would serve for a hurried departure--and I felt
now that departure was necessary.

A soft sound of musical bells reached my ears at this moment
announcing dinner,--and leaving the 'princess's' apartment, I met
Santoris at the entrance to the saloon. There was no one else there
for the moment but himself, and as I came towards him he took my
hands in his own and raised them to his lips.

"You are not yet resolved!" he said, in a low tone, smiling--"Take
plenty of time!"

I lifted my eyes to his, and all doubt seemed swept away in the
light of our mutual glances--I smiled in response to his look,--and
we loosened our hands quickly as Mr. Harland with his doctor and
secretary came down from the deck, Catherine joining us from the
cabin where she had disburdened herself of her invalid wrappings.
She was rather more elegantly attired than usual--she wore a curious
purple-coloured gown with threads of gold interwoven in the stuff,
and a collar of lace turned back at the throat gave her the aspect
of an old Italian picture--a sort of 'Portrait of a lady,--Artist
unknown.' Not a pleasant portrait, perhaps--but characteristic of a
certain dull and self-centred type of woman. We were soon seated at
table--a table richly, yet daintily, appointed, and adorned with the
costliest flowers and fruits. The men who waited upon us were all
Easterns, dark-eyed and dark-skinned, and wore the Eastern dress,--
all their movements were swift yet graceful and dignified--they made
no noise in the business of serving,--not a dish clattered, not a
glass clashed. They were perfect servants, taking care to avoid the
common but reprehensible method of offering dishes to persons
conversing, thus interrupting the flow of talk at inopportune
moments. And what talk it was!--all sorts of subjects, social and
impersonal, came up for discussion, and Santoris handled them with
such skill that he made us forget that there was anything remarkable
or unusual about himself or his surroundings, though, as a matter of
fact, no more princely banquet could ever have been served in the
most luxurious of palaces. Half-way through the meal, when the
conversation came for a moment to a pause, the most exquisite music
charmed our ears--beginning softly and far away, it swelled out to
rich and glorious harmonies like a full orchestra playing under the
sea. We looked at each other and then at our host in charmed
enquiry.

"Electricity again!" he said--"So simply managed that it is not
worth talking about! Unfortunately, it is mechanical music, and this
can never be like the music evolved from brain and fingers; however,
it fills in gaps of silence when conventional minds are at a strain
for something to say--something quite 'safe' and unlikely to provoke
discussion!"

His keen blue eyes flashed with a sudden gleam of scorn in them. I
looked at him half questioningly, and the scorn melted into a smile.

"It isn't good form to start any subject which might lead to
argument," he went on--"The modern brain must not be exercised too
strenuously,--it is not strong enough to stand much effort. What do
you say, Harland?"

"I agree," answered Mr. Harland. "As a rule people who dine as well
as we are dining to-night have no room left for mentality--they
become all digestion!"

Dr. Brayle laughed.

"Nothing like a good dinner if one has an appetite for it. I think
it quite possible that Faust would have left his Margaret for a full
meal!"

"I'm sure he would!" chimed in Mr. Swinton--"Any man would!"

Santoris looked down the table with a curious air of half-amused
inspection. His eyes, clear and searching in their swift glance,
took in the whole group of us--Mr. Harland enjoying succulent
asparagus; Dr. Brayle drinking champagne; Mr. Swinton helping
himself out of some dish of good things offered to him by one of the
servants; Catherine playing in a sort of demure, old-maidish way
with knife and fork as if she were eating against her will--and
finally they rested on me, to whom the dinner was just a pretty
pageant of luxury in which I scarcely took any part.

"Well, whatever Faust would or would not do," he said, half
laughingly--"it's certain that food is never at a discount. Women
frequently are."

"Women," said Mr. Harland, poising a stem of asparagus in the air,
"are so constituted as to invariably make havoc either of themselves
or of the men they profess to love. Wives neglect their husbands,
and husbands naturally desert their wives. Devoted lovers quarrel
and part over the merest trifles. The whole thing is a mistake."

"What whole thing?" asked Santoris, smiling.

"The relations between man and woman," Harland answered. "In my
opinion we should conduct ourselves like the birds and animals,
whose relationships are neither binding nor lasting, but are just
sufficient to preserve the type. That's all that is really needed.
What is called love is mere sentiment."

"Do you endorse that verdict, Miss Harland?" Santoris asked,
suddenly.

Catherine looked up, startled--her yellow skin flushed a pale red.

"I don't know," she answered--"I scarcely heard--""

"Your father doesn't believe in love," he said--"Do you?"

"I hope it exists," she murmured--"But nowadays people are so VERY
practical--"

"Oh, believe me, they are no more practical now than they ever
were!" averred Santoris, laughing. "There's as much romance in the
modern world as in the ancient;--the human heart has the same
passions, but they are more deeply suppressed and therefore more
dangerous. And love holds the same eternal sway--so does jealousy."

Dr. Brayle looked up.

"Jealousy is an uncivilised thing," he said--"It is a kind of
primitive passion from which no well-ordered mind should suffer."

Santoris smiled.

"Primitive passions are as forceful as they ever were," he answered.
"No culture can do away with them. Jealousy, like love, is one of
the motive powers of progress. It is a great evil--but a necessary
one--as necessary as war. Without strife of some sort the world
would become like a stagnant pool breeding nothing but weeds and the
slimy creatures pertaining to foulness. Even in love, the most
divine of passions, there should be a wave of uncertainty and a
sense of unsolved mystery to give it everlastingness."

"Everlastingness?" queried Mr. Harland--"Or simply life
lastingness?"

"Everlastingness!" repeated Santoris. "Love that lacks eternal
stability is not love at all, but simply an affectionate
understanding and agreeable companionship in this world only. For
the other world or worlds--"

"Ah! You are going too far," interrupted Mr. Harland--"You know I
cannot follow you! And with all due deference to the fair sex I very
much doubt if any one of them would care for a love that was
destined to last for ever."

"No MAN would," interrupted Brayle, sarcastically.

Santoris gave him a quick glance.

"No man is asked to care!" he said--"Nor woman either. SOULS are not
only asked, but COMMANDED, to care! This, however, is beyond you!"

"And beyond most people," answered Brayle--"Such ideas are purely
imaginary and transcendental."

"Granted!" And Santoris gave him a quick, straight glance--"But what
do you mean by 'imaginary' and 'transcendental'? Imagination is the
faculty of conceiving in the brain ideas which may with time spring
to the full fruition of realisation. Every item of our present-day
civilisation has been 'imagined' before taking practical shape.
'Transcendental' means BEYOND the ordinary happenings of life and
life's bodily routine--and this 'beyond' expresses itself so often
that there are few lives lived for a single day without some touch
of its inexplicable marvel. It is on such lines as these that human
beings drift away from happiness,--they will only believe what they
can see, while all the time their actual lives depend on what they
do NOT see!"

There was a moment's silence. The charm of his voice was potent--and
still more so the fascination of his manner and bearing, and Mr.
Harland looked at him in something of wonder and appeal.

"You are a strange fellow, Santoris!" he said, at last, "And you
always were! Even now I can hardly believe that you are really the
very Santoris that struck such terror into the hearts of some of us
undergrads at Oxford! I say I can hardly believe it, though I know
you ARE the man. But I wish you would tell me--"

"All about myself?" And Santoris smiled--"I will, with pleasure!--if
the story does not bore you. There is no mystery about it--no 'black
magic,' or 'occultism' of any kind. I have done nothing since I left
college but adapt myself to the forces of Nature, AND TO USE THEM
WHEN NECESSARY. The same way of life is open to all--and the same
results are bound to follow."

"Results? Such as--?" queried Brayle.

"Health, youth and power!" answered Santoris, with an involuntary
slight clenching of the firm, well-shaped hand that rested lightly
on the table,--"Command of oneself!--command of body, command of
spirit, and so on through an ever ascending scale! Every man with
the breath of God in him is a master, not a slave!"

My heart beat quickly as he spoke; something rose up in me like a
response to a call, and I wondered--Did he assume to master ME? No!
I would not yield to that! If yielding were necessary, it must be my
own free will that gave in, not his compelling influence! As this
thought ran through my brain I met his eyes,--he smiled a little,
and I saw he had guessed my mind. The warm blood rushed to my cheeks
in a fervent glow, nevertheless the defiance of my soul was strong--
as strong as the love which had begun to dominate me. And I listened
eagerly as he went on.

"I began at Oxford by playing the slave part," he said--"a slave to
conventions and fossil-methods of instruction. One can really learn
more from studying the actual formation of rocks than from those
worthy Dons whom nothing will move out of their customary ruts of
routine. Even at that early time I felt that, given a man of health
and good physical condition, with sound brain, sound lungs and firm
nerves, it was not apparent why he, evidently born to rule, should
put himself into the leading strings of Oxford or any other forcing-
bed of intellectual effort. That it would be better if such an one
took HIMSELF in hand and tried to find out HIS OWN meaning, both in
relation to the finite and infinite gradations of Spirit and Matter.
And I resolved to enter upon the task--without allowing myself to
fear failure or to hope for success. My aim was to discover Myself
and my meaning, if such a thing were possible. No atom, however
infinitesimal, is without origin, history, place and use in the
Universe--and I, a conglomerated mass of atoms called Man, resolved
to search out the possibilities, finite and infinite, of my own
entity. With this aim I began--with this aim I continued."

"Your task is not finished, then?" put in Dr. Brayle, with a
smilingly incredulous air.

"It will never be finished," answered Santoris--"An eternal thing
has no end."

There was a moment's silence.

"Well,--go on, Santoris!" said Mr. Harland, with a touch of
impatience,--"And tell us especially what we all of us are chiefly
anxious to know--how it is that you are young when according to the
time of the world you should be old?"

Santoris smiled again.

"Ah! That is a purely personal touch of inquisitiveness!" he
answered--"It is quite human and natural, of course, but not always
wise. In every great lesson of life or scientific discovery people
ask first of all 'How can _I_ benefit by it?' or 'How will it affect
ME?' And while asking the question they yet will not trouble to get
an answer OUT OF THEMSELVES,--but they turn to others for the
solution of the mystery. To keep young is not at all difficult; when
certain simple processes of Nature are mastered the difficulty is to
grow old!"

We all sat silent, waiting in mute expectancy. The servants had left
us, and only the fruits and dainties of dessert remained to tempt us
in baskets and dishes of exquisitely coloured Venetian glass,
contrasting with the graceful clusters of lovely roses and lilies
which added their soft charm to the decorative effect of the table,
and Santoris passed the wine, a choice Chateau-Yquem, round to us
all before beginning to speak again. And when he did speak, it was
in a singularly quiet, musical voice which exercised a kind of spell
upon my ears--I had heard that voice before--ah!--how often! How
often through the course of my life had I listened to it wonderingly
in dreams of which the waking morning brought no explanation! How it
had stolen upon me like an echo from far away, when alone in the
pauses of work and thought I had longed for some comprehension and
sympathy! And I had reproached myself for my own fancies and
imaginings, deeming them wholly foolish and irresponsible! And now!
Now its gentle and familiar tone went straight to the centre of my
spiritual consciousness, and forced me to realise that for the Soul
there is no escape from its immortal remembrance!




XI

ONE WAY OF LOVE


"When I left Oxford," he said--"as I told you before, I left what I
conceived to be slavery--that is, a submissively ordered routine of
learning in which there occurred nothing new--nothing hopeful--
nothing really serviceable. I mastered all there was to master, and
carried away 'honours' which I deemed hardly worth winning. It was
supposed then--most people would suppose it--that as I found myself
the possessor of an income of between five and six thousand a year,
I would naturally 'live my life,' as the phrase goes, and enter upon
what is called a social career. Now to my mind a social career
simply means social sham--and to live my life had always a broader
application for me than for the majority of men. So, having
ascertained all I could concerning myself and my affairs from my
father's London solicitors, and learning exactly how I was situated
with regard to finances and what is called the 'practical' side of
life, I left England for Egypt, the land where I was born. I had an
object in view,--and that object was not only to see my own old
home, but to find out the whereabouts of a certain great sage and
mystic philosopher long known in the East by the name of Heliobas."

I started, and the blood rushed to my cheeks in a burning flame.

"I think YOU knew him," he went on, addressing me directly, with a
straight glance--"You met him some years back, did you not?"

I bent my head in silent assent,--and saw the eyes of my host and
hostess turned upon me in questioning scrutiny.

"In a certain circle of students and mystics he was renowned,"
continued Santoris,--"and I resolved to see what he could make of
me--what he would advise, and how I should set to work to discover
what I had resolved to find. However, at the end of a long and
tedious journey, I met with disappointment--Heliobas had removed to
another sphere of action--"

"He was dead, you mean," interposed Mr. Harland.

"Not at all," answered Santoris, calmly. "There is no death. To put
it quite simply, he had reached the top of his class in this
particular school of life and learning and, therefore, was ready and
willing to pass on into the higher grade. He, however, left a
successor capable of maintaining the theories he inculcated,--a man
named Aselzion, who elected to live in an almost inaccessible spot
among mountains with a few followers and disciples. Him I found
after considerable difficulty--and we came to understand each other
so well that I stayed with him some time studying all that he deemed
needful before I started on my own voyage of discovery. His methods
of instruction were arduous and painful--in fact, I may say I went
through a veritable ordeal of fire--"

He broke off, and for a moment seemed absorbed in recollections.

"You are speaking, I suppose, of some rule of life, some kind of
novitiate to which you had to submit yourself," said Mr. Harland--
"Or was it merely a course of study?"

"In one sense it was a sort of novitiate or probation," answered
Santoris, slowly, with the far-away, musing look still in his eyes--
"In another it was, as you put it, 'merely' a course of study.
Merely! It was a course of study in which every nerve, every muscle,
every sinew was tested to its utmost strength--and in which a combat
between the spiritual and material was fiercely fought till the one
could master the other so absolutely as to hold it in perfect
subjection. Well! I came out of the trial fairly well--strong enough
at any rate to stand alone--as I have done ever since."

"And to what did your severe ordeal lead?" asked Dr. Brayle, who by
this time appeared interested, though still wearing his incredulous,
half-sneering air--"To anything which you could not have gained just
as easily without it?"

Santoris looked straight at him. His keen eyes glowed as though some
bright fire of the soul had leaped into them.

"In the first place," he answered--"it led me to power! Power,--not
only over myself but over all things small and great that surround
or concern my being. I think you will admit that if a man takes up
any line of business, it is necessary for him to understand all its
technical methods and practical details. My business was and IS
Life!--the one thing that humanity never studies, and therefore
fails to master."

Mr. Harland looked up.

"Life is mysterious and inexplicable," he said--"We cannot tell why
we live. No one can fathom that mystery. We are Here through no
conscious desire of our own,--and again we are NOT here just as we
have learned to accommodate ourselves to the fact of being
Anywhere!"

"True!" answered Santoris--"But to understand the 'why' of life we
must first of all realise that its origin Is Love. Love creates life
because it MUST; even agnostics, when pushed to the wall in argument
grant that some mysterious and mighty Force is at the back of
creation,--a Force which is both intelligent and beneficent. The
trite saying 'God is Love' is true enough, but it is quite as true
to say 'Love is God.' The commencement of universes, solar systems
and worlds is the desire of Love to express Itself. No more and no
less than this. From desire springs action,--from action life. It
only remains for each living unit to bring itself into harmonious
union with this one fundamental law of the whole cosmos,--the
expression and action of Love which is based, as naturally it must
be, on a dual entity."

"What do you mean by that?" asked Dr. Brayle.

"As a physician, and I presume as a scientist, you ought scarcely to
ask," replied Santoris, with a slight smile. "For you surely know
there is no single thing in the Universe. The very microbes of
disease or health go in pairs. Light and darkness,--the up and the
down,--the right and the left,--the storm and the calm,--the male
and the female,--all things are dual; and the sorrows of humanity
are for the most part the result of ill-assorted numbers,--figures
brought together that will not count up properly--wrong halves of
the puzzle that will never fit into place. The mischief runs through
all civilization,--wrong halves of races brought together which do
not and never can assimilate,--and in an individual personal sense
wrong halves of spirit and matter are often forced together which
are bound by law to separate in time with some attendant disaster.
The error is caused by the obstinate miscomprehension of man himself
as to the nature and extent of his own powers and faculties. He
forgets that he is not 'as the beasts that perish,' but that he has
the breath of God in him,--that he holds within himself the seed of
immortality which is perpetually re-creative. He is bound by all the
laws of the Universe to give that immortal life its dual entity and
attendant power, without which he cannot attain his highest ends. It
may take him thousands of years--cycles of time,--but it has to be
done. Materially speaking, he may perhaps consider that he has
secured his dual entity by a pleasing or fortunate marriage--but if
he is not spiritually mated, his marriage is useless,--ay! worse
than useless, as it only interposes fresh obstacles between himself
and his intended progress."

"Marriage can hardly be called a useless institution," said Dr.
Brayle, with an uplifting of his sinister brows; "It helps to
populate the world."

"It does," answered Santoris, calmly--"But if the pairs that are
joined in marriage have no spiritual bond between them and nothing
beyond the attraction of the mere body--they people the world with
more or less incapable, unthinking and foolish creatures like
themselves. And supposing these to be born in tens of millions, like
ants or flies, they will not carry on the real purpose of man's
existence to anything more than that stoppage and recoil which is
called Death, but which in reality is only a turning back of the
wheels of time when the right road has been lost and it becomes
imperative to begin the journey all over again."

We sat silent; no one had any comment to offer.

"We are arriving at that same old turning-point once more," he
continued--"The Western civilisation of two thousand years, assisted
(and sometimes impeded) by the teachings of Christianity, is nearing
its end. Out of the vast wreckage of nations, now imminent, only a
few individuals can be saved,--and the storm is so close at hand
that one can almost hear the mutterings of the thunder! But why
should I or you or anyone else think about it? We have our own
concerns to attend to--and we attend to these so well that we forget
all the most vital necessities that should make them of any
importance! However--in this day--nothing matters! Shall I go on
with my own story, or have you heard enough?"

"Not half enough!" said Catherine Harland, quite suddenly--she had
scarcely spoken before, but she now leaned forward, looking eagerly
interested--"You speak of power over yourself,--do you possess the
same power over others?"

"Not unless they come into my own circle of action," he answered.
"It would not be worth my while to exert any influence on persons
who are, and ever must be, indifferent to me. I can, of course,
defend myself against enemies--and that without lifting a hand."

Everyone, save myself, looked at him inquisitively,--but he did not
explain his meaning. He went on very quietly with his own personal
narrative.

"As I have told you," he said--"I came out of my studies with
Aselzion successfully enough to feel justified in going on with my
work alone. I took up my residence in Egypt in my father's old home-
-a pretty place enough with wide pleasure grounds planted thickly
with palm trees and richly filled with flowers,--and here I
undertook the mastery and comprehension of the most difficult
subject ever propounded for learning--the most evasive, complex, yet
exact piece of mathematics ever set out for solving--Myself! Myself
was my puzzle! How to unite myself with Nature so thoroughly as to
insinuate myself into her secrets,--possess all she could offer me,-
-and yet detach myself from Self so completely as to be ready to
sacrifice all I had gained at a moment's notice should that moment
come."

"You are paradoxical," said Mr. Harland, irritably. "What's the use
of gaining anything if it is to be lost at a moment's bidding?"

"It is the only way to hold and keep whatever there is to win,"
answered Santoris, calmly--"And the paradox is no greater than that
of 'He that loveth his life shall lose it.' The only 'moment' of
supreme self-surrender is Love--when that comes everything else must
go. Love alone can compass life, perfect it, complete it and carry
it on to eternal happiness. But please bear in mind that I am
speaking of real Love,--not mere physical attraction. The two things
are as different as light from darkness."

"Is your curious conception or ideal of love the reason, why you
have never married?" asked Brayle, abruptly.

"Precisely!" replied Santoris. "It is most unquestionably and
emphatically the reason why I have never married."

There was a pause. I saw Catherine glancing at him with a strange
furtiveness in which there was something of fear.

"You have never met your ideal, I suppose?" she asked, with a faint
smile.

"Oh yes, I've met her!" he answered--"Ages ago! On many occasions I
have met her;--sometimes she has estranged herself from me,--
sometimes she has been torn from me by others--and still more often
I have, through my own folly and obstinacy, separated myself from
her--but our mutual mistakes do no more than delay the inevitable
union at last."--Here he spoke slowly and with marked meaning--"For
it IS an inevitable union!--as inevitable as that of two electrons
which, after spinning in space for certain periods of time, rush
together at last and remain so indissolubly united that nothing can
ever separate them."

"And then?" queried Dr. Brayle, with an ironical air.

"Then? Why, everything is possible then! Beauty, perfection, wisdom,
progress, creativeness, and a world--even worlds--of splendid
thought and splendid ideals, bound to lead to still more splendid
realisation! It is not difficult to imagine two brains, two minds
moving so absolutely in unison that like a grand chord of music they
strike harmony through hitherto dumb life-episodes--but think of two
immortal souls full of a love as deathless as themselves, conjoined
in highest effort and superb attainment!--the love of angel for
angel, of god for god! You think this ideal imaginative,--
transcendental--impossible!--yet I swear to you it is the most REAL
possibility in this fleeting mirage of a world!"

His voice thrilled with a warmth of feeling and conviction, and as I
heard him speak I trembled inwardly with a sudden remorse--a quick
sense of inferiority and shame. Why could I not let myself go? Why
did I not give the fluttering spirit within me room to expand its
wings? Something opposing,--something inimical to my peace and
happiness held me back--and presently I began to wonder whether I
should attribute it to the influence of those with whom I was
temporarily associated. I was almost confirmed in this impression
when Mr. Harland's voice, harsh and caustic as it could be when he
was irritated or worsted in an argument, broke the momentary
silence.

"You are more impossible now than you ever were at Oxford,
Santoris!" he said--"You out-transcend all transcendentalism! You
know, or you ought to know by this time, that there is no such thing
as an immortal soul--and if you believe otherwise you have brought
yourself voluntarily into that state of blind credulity. All science
teaches us that we are the mere spawn of the planet on which we
live,--we are here to make the best of it for ourselves and for
others who come after us--and there's an end. What is called Love is
the mere physical attraction between the two sexes--no more,--and it
soon palls. All that we gain we quickly cease to care for--it is the
way of humanity."

"What a poor creation humanity is, then!" said Santoris, with a
smile--"How astonishing that it should exist at all for no higher
aims than those of the ant or the mouse! My dear Harland, if your
beliefs were really sound we should be bound in common duty and
charity to stop the population of the world altogether--for the
whole business is useless. Useless and even cruel, for it is nothing
but a crime to allow people to be born for no other end than
extinction! However, keep your creeds! I thank Heaven they are not
mine!"

Mr. Harland gave a slight movement of impatience. I could see that
he was disturbed in his mind.

"Let's talk of something I can follow," he said--"the personal and
material side of things. Your perennial condition of health, for
example. Your apparent youth--"

"Oh, is it only 'apparent'?" laughed Santoris, gaily--"Well, to
those who never knew me in my boyhood's days and are therefore never
hurling me back to their 'thirty years or more ago' of friendship,
etc., my youth seems very actual! You see their non-ability to count
up the time I have spent on earth obliges them to accept me at my
own valuation! There's really nothing to explain in the matter.
Everyone can keep young if he understands himself and Nature. If I
were to tell you the literal truth of the process, you would not
believe me,--and even if you did you would not have the patience to
carry it out! But what does it matter after all? If we only live for
the express purpose of dying, the sooner we get the business over
and done with the better--youth itself has no charms under such
circumstances. All the purposes of life, however lofty and nobly
planned, are bound to end in nothingness,--and it is hardly worth
while taking the trouble to breathe the murderous air!"

He spoke with a kind of passion--his eyes were luminous--his face
transfigured with an almost superhuman glow, and we all looked at
him in something of amazement.

Mr. Harland fidgeted uneasily in his chair.

"You go too far!" he said--"Life is agreeable as long as it lasts--"

"Have you found it so?" Santoris interrupted him. "Has it not, even
in your pursuit and attainment of wealth, brought you more pain than
pleasure? Number up all the possibilities of life, from the
existence of the labourer in his hut to that of the king on his
throne, they are none of them worth striving for or keeping if death
is the ultimate end. Ambition is merest folly,--wealth a temporary
possession of perishable goods which must pass to others,--fame a
brief noise of one's name in mouths that will soon be dumb,--and
love, sex-attraction only. What a treacherous and criminal act,
then, is this Creation of Universes!--what mad folly!--what sheer,
blind, reasonless wickedness!"

There was a silence. His eyes flashed from one to the other of us.

"Can you deny it?" he demanded. "Can you find any sane, logical
reason for the continuance of life which is to end in utter
extinction, or for the creation of worlds doomed to eternal
destruction?"

No one spoke.

"You have no answer ready," he said--and smiled--"Naturally! For an
answer is impossible! And here you have the key to what you consider
my mystery--the mystery of keeping young instead of growing old--the
secret of living instead of dying! It is simply the conscious
PRACTICAL realisation that there is no Death, but only Change. That
is the first part of the process. Change, or transmutation and
transformation of the atoms and elements of which we are composed,
is going on for ever without a second's cessation,--it began when we
were born and before we were born--and the art of LIVING YOUNG
consists simply in using one's soul and will-power to guide this
process of change towards the ends we desire, instead of leaving it
to blind chance and to the association with inimical influences,
which interfere with our best actions. For example--I--a man in
sound health and condition--realise that with every moment SOME
change is working in me towards SOME end. It rests entirely with
myself as to whether the change shall be towards continuance of
health or towards admission of disease--towards continuance of youth
or towards the encouragement of age,--towards life as it presents
itself to me now, or towards some other phase of life as I perceive
it in the future. I can advance or retard myself as I please--the
proper management of Myself being my business. If I should suffer
pain or illness I am very sure it will be chiefly through my own
fault--if I invite decay and decrepitude, it will be because I allow
these forces to encroach upon my well-being--in fact, briefly--I AM
what I WILL to be!--and all the laws that brought me into existence
support me in this attitude of mind, body and spirit!"

"If we could all become what we WOULD be," said Dr. Brayle, "we
should attain the millennium!"

"Are you sure of that?" queried Santoris. "Would it not rather
depend on the particular choice each one of us might make? You, for
example, might wish to be something that would hardly tend to your
happiness,--and your wish being obtained you might become what (if
you had only realised it) you would give worlds not to be! Some men
desire to be thieves--even murderers--and become so--but the end of
their desires is not perhaps what they imagined!"

"Can you read people's thoughts?" asked Catherine, suddenly.

Santoris looked amused. He replied by a counter question.

"Would you be sorry if I could?"

She flushed a little. I smiled, knowing what was in her mind.

"It would be a most unpleasant accomplishment--that of reading the
thoughts of others," said Mr. Harland; "I would rather not cultivate
it." "But Mr. Santoris almost implies that he possesses it," said
Dr. Brayle, with a touch of irritation in his manner; "And, after
all, 'thought-reading' is a kind of society amusement nowadays.
There is nothing very difficult in it."

"Nothing, indeed!" agreed Santoris, lightly; "And being as easy as
it is, why do you not show us at once that antique piece of
jewellery you have in your pocket! You brought it with you this
evening to show to me and ask my opinion of its value, did you not?"

Brayle's eyes opened in utter amazement. If ever a man was taken
completely by surprise, he was.

"How did you know?" he began, stammeringly, while Mr. Harland,
equally astonished, stared at him through his round spectacles as
though challenging some defiance.

Santoris laughed.

"Thought-reading is only a society amusement, as you have just
observed," he said--"And I have been amusing myself with it for the
last few minutes. Come!--let us see your treasure!"

Dr. Brayle was thoroughly embarrassed,--but he tried to cover his
confusion by an awkward laugh.

"Well, you have made a very clever hit!" he said--"Quite a random
shot, of course--which by mere coincidence went to its mark! It's
quite true I have brought with me a curious piece of jewel-work
which I always carry about wherever I go--and something moved me to-
night to ask your opinion of its value, as well as to place its
period. It is old Italian; but even experts are not agreed as to its
exact date."

He put his hand in his breast pocket and drew out a small silk bag
from which he took with great care a collar of jewels, designed in a
kind of chain-work which made it perfectly flexible. He laid it out
on the table,--and I bit my lip hard to suppress an involuntary
exclamation. For I had seen the thing before--and for the immediate
moment could not realise where, till a sudden flash of light through
the cells of my brain reminded me of that scene of love and death in
the vision of the artist's studio when the name 'Cosmo de Medicis'
had been whispered like an evil omen. The murderer in that dream-
picture had worn a collar of jewels precisely similar to the one I
now saw; but I could only keep silence and listen with every nerve
strained to utmost attention while Santoris took the ornament in his
hand and looked at it with an intent earnestness in which there was
almost a touch of compassion.

"A beautiful piece of workmanship," he said, at last, slowly, while
Mr. Harland, Catherine, and Swinton the secretary all drew up closer
to him at the table and leaned eagerly forward--"And I should say"--
here he raised his eyes and looked full at the dark, brooding,
sinister face of Brayle--"I should say that it belonged to the
Medici period. It must have been part of the dress of a nobleman of
that time--the design seems to me to be Florentine. Perhaps if these
jewels could speak they might tell a strange story!--they are
unhappy stones!"

"Unhappy!" exclaimed Catherine--"You mean unlucky?"

"No!--there is no such thing as luck," answered Santoris, quietly,
turning the collar over and over in his hands--"Not for either
jewels or men! But there IS unhappiness,--and unhappiness simply
means life being put to wrong uses. I call these gems 'unhappy'
because they have been wrongfully used. A precious stone is a living
thing--it absorbs influences as the earth absorbs light, and these
jewels have absorbed some sense of evil that renders them less
beautiful than they might be. These diamonds and rubies, these
emeralds and sapphires, have not the full lustre of their own true
nature,--they are in the condition of pining flowers. It will take
centuries before they resume their natural brilliancy. There is some
tragedy hidden among them."

Dr. Brayle looked amused.

"Well, I can give you no history of them," he said--"A friend of
mine bought the collar from an old Jew curiosity dealer in a back
street of Florence and sent it to me to wear with a Florentine dress
at a fancy dress ball. Curiously enough I chose to represent one of
the Medicis, some artist having told me my features resembled their
type of countenance. That's the chronicle, so far as I am concerned.
I rather liked it on account of its antiquity. I could have sold it
many times over, but I have no desire to part with it."

"Naturally!"--and Santoris passed on the collar to everyone to
examine--"You feel a sense of proprietorship in it."

Catherine Harland had the trinket in her hand, and a curious vague
look of terror came over her face as she presently passed it back to
its owner. But she made no remark and it was Mr. Harland who resumed
the conversation.

"That's an odd idea of yours about unhappy jewels," he said--
"Perhaps the misfortune attending the possessors of the famous blue
Hope diamond could be traced to some early tragedy connected with
it."

"Unquestionably!" replied Santoris. "Now look at this!"--and he drew
from his watch pocket a small fine gold chain to which was attached
a moonstone of singular size and beauty, set in a circle of
diamonds--"Here is a sort of talismanic jewel--it has never known
any disastrous influences, nor has it been disturbed by malevolent
surroundings. It is a perfectly happy, unsullied gem! As you see,
the lustre is perfect--as clear as that of a summer moon in heaven.
Yet it is a very old jewel and has seen more than a thousand years
of life."

We all examined the beautiful ornament, and as I held it in my hand
a moment it seemed to emit tiny sparks of luminance like a flash of
moonlight on rippling waves.

"Women should take care that their jewels are made happy," he
continued, looking at me with a slight smile, "That is, if they want
them to shine. Nothing that lives is at its best unless it is in a
condition of happiness--a condition which after all is quite easy to
attain."

"Easy! I should have thought nothing was so difficult!" said Mr.
Harland.

"Nothing certainly is so difficult in the ordinary way of life men
choose to live," answered Santoris--"For the most part they run
after the shadow and forsake the light. Even in work and the
creative action of thought each ordinary man imagines that his
especial work being all-important, it is necessary for him to
sacrifice everything to it. And he does,--if he is filled with
worldly ambition and selfish concentration; and he produces
something--anything--which frequently proves to be ephemeral as
gossamer dust. It is only when work is the outcome of a great love
and keen sympathy for others that it lasts and keeps its influence.
Now we have talked enough about all these theories, which are not
interesting to anyone who is not prepared to accept them--shall we
go up on deck?"

We all rose at once, Santoris holding out a box of cigars to the men
to help themselves. Catherine and I preceded them up the saloon
stairs to the deck, which was now like a sheet of silver in the
light shed by one of the loveliest moons of the year. The water
around was sparkling with phosphorescence and the dark mountains
looked higher and more imposing than ever, rising as they seemed to
do sheer up from the white splendour of the sea. I leaned over the
deck rail, gazing down into the deep liquid mirror of stars below,
and my heart was heavy and full of a sense of bitterness and tears.
Catherine had dropped languidly into a chair and was leaning back in
it with a strange, far-away expression on her tired face. Suddenly
she spoke with an almost mournful gentleness.

"Do you like his theories?"

I turned towards her enquiringly.

"I mean, do you like the idea of there being no death and that we
only change from one life to another and so on for ever?" she
continued. "To me it is appalling! Sometimes I think death the
kindest thing that can happen--especially for women."

I was in the mood to agree with her. I went up to her and knelt down
by her side.

"Yes!" I said, and I felt the tremor of tears in my voice--"Yes, for
women death often seems very kind! When there is no love and no hope
of love,--when the world is growing grey and the shadows are
deepening towards night,--when the ones we most dearly love misjudge
and mistrust us and their hearts are closed against our tenderness,
then death seems the greatest god of all!--one before whom we may
well kneel and offer up our prayers! Who could, who WOULD live for
ever quite alone in an eternity without love? Oh, how much kinder,
how much sweeter would be utter extinction--"

My voice broke; and Catherine, moved by some sudden womanly impulse,
put her arm round me.

"Why, you are crying!" she said, softly. "What is it? You, who are
always so bright and happy!"

I quickly controlled the weakness of my tears.

"Yes, it is foolish!" I said--"But I feel to-night as if I had
wasted a good part of my life in useless research,--in looking for
what has been, after all, quite close to my hand,--only that I
failed to see it!--and that I must go back upon the road I thought I
had passed--"

Here I paused. I saw she could not understand me.

"Catherine," I went on, abruptly--"Will you let me leave you in a
day or two? I have been quite a fortnight with you on board the
'Diana,' and I think I have had enough holiday. I should like"--and
I looked up at her from where I knelt--"I should like to part from
you while we remain good friends--and I have an idea that perhaps we
shall not agree so well if we learn to know more of each other."

She bent her eyes upon me with a half-frightened expression.

"How strange you should think that!" she murmured--"I have felt the
same--and yet I really like you very much--I always liked you--I
wish you would believe it!"

I smiled.

"Dear Catherine," I said--"it is no use shutting our eyes to the
fact that while there is something which attracts us to each other,
there is also something which repels. We cannot argue about it or
analyse it. Such mysterious things DO occur,--and they are beyond
our searching out--"

"But," she interrupted, quickly--"we were not so troubled by these
mysterious things till we met this man Santoris--"

She broke off, and I rose to my feet, as just then Santoris
approached, accompanied by Mr. Harland and the others.

"I have suggested giving you a sail by moonlight before you leave,"
he said. "It will be an old experience for you under new conditions.
Sailing by moonlight in an ordinary sense is an ordinary thing,--but
sailing by moonlight with the moonlight as part of our motive power
has perhaps a touch of originality."

As he spoke he made a sign to one of his men who came up to receive
his orders, which were given in too low a tone for us to hear. Easy
deck chairs were placed for all the party, and we were soon seated
in a group together, somewhat silently at first, our attention being
entirely riveted on the wonderful, almost noiseless way in which the
sails of the 'Dream' were unfurled. There was no wind,--the night
was warm and intensely still--the sea absolutely calm. Like broad
white wings, the canvas gradually spread out under the deft, quick
hands of the sailors employed in handling it,--the anchor was drawn
up in the same swift and silent manner--then there came an instant's
pause. Mr. Harland drew his cigar from his mouth and looked up
amazed, as we all did, at the mysterious way in which the sails
filled out, pulling the cordage tightly into bands of iron
strength,--and none of us could restrain an involuntary cry of
wonder and admiration as their whiteness began to glitter with the
radiance of hoar-frost, the strange luminance deepening in intensity
till it seemed as if the whole stretch of canvas from end to end of
the magnificent schooner was a mass of fine jewel-work sparkling
under the moon.

"Well! However much I disagree with your theories of life,
Santoris," said Mr. Harland,--"I will give you full credit for this
extraordinary yacht of yours! It's the most wonderful thing I ever
saw, and you are a wonderful fellow to have carried out such an
unique application of science. You ought to impart your secret to
the world."

Santoris laughed lightly.

"And the world would take a hundred years or more to discuss it,
consider it, deny it, and finally accept it," he said--"No! One
grows tired of asking the world to be either wise or happy. It
prefers its own way--just as I prefer mine. It will discover the
method of sailing without wind, and it will learn how to make every
sort of mechanical progress without steam in time--but not in our
day,--and I, personally, cannot afford to wait while it is slowly
learning its ABC like a big child under protest. You see we're going
now!"

We were 'going' indeed,--it would have been more correct to say we
were flying. Over the still water our vessel glided like a moving
beautiful shape of white fire, swiftly and steadily, with no sound
save the little hissing murmur of the water cleft under her keel.
And then like a sudden whisper from fairyland came the ripple of
harp-strings, running upward in phrases of exquisite melody, and a
boy's voice, clear, soft and full, began to sing, with a pure
enunciation which enabled us to hear every word:

     Sailing, sailing! Whither?
      What path of the flashing sea
      Seems best for you and me?
         No matter the way,
         By night or day,
      So long as we sail together!

     Sailing, sailing! Whither?
      Into the rosy grace
      Of the sun's deep setting-place?
         We need not know
         How far we go,
      So long as we sail together!

     Sailing, sailing! Whither?
      To the glittering rainbow strand
      Of Love's enchanted land?
         We ask not where
         In earth or air,
      So long as we sail together!

     Sailing, sailing! Whither?
      On to the life divine,--
      Your soul made one with mine!
         In Heaven or Hell
         All must be well,
      So long as we sail together!

The song finished with a passionate chord which, played as it was
with swift intensity, seemed to awaken a response from the sea,--at
any rate a strange shivering echo trembled upward as it were from
the water and floated into the spacious silence of the night. My
heart beat with uncomfortable quickness and my eyes grew hot with
the weight of suppressed tears;--why could I not escape from the
cruel, restraining force that held my real self prisoner as with
manacles of steel? I could not even speak; and while the others were
clapping their hands in delighted applause at the beauty of both
voice and song, I sat silent.

"He sings well!" said Santoris--"He is the Eastern lad you saw when
you came on deck this morning. I brought him from Egypt. He will
give us another song presently. Shall we walk a little?"

We rose and paced the deck slowly, gradually dividing in couples,
Catherine and Dr. Brayle--Mr. Harland and his secretary,--Santoris
and myself. We two paused together at the stern of the vessel
looking towards the bowsprit, which seemed to pierce the distance of
sea and sky like a flying arrow.

"You wish to speak to me alone," said Santoris, then--"Do you not?
Though I know what you want to say!"

I glanced at him with a touch of defiance.

"Then I need not speak," I answered.

"No, you need not speak, unless you give utterance to what is in
your true soul," he said--"I would rather you did not play at
conventions with me."

For the moment I felt almost angry.

"I do not play at conventions," I murmured.

"Oh, do you not? Is that quite candid?"

I raised my eyes and met his,--he was smiling. Some of the
oppression in my soul suddenly gave way, and I spoke hurriedly in a
low tone.

"Surely you know how difficult it is for me?" I said. "Things have
happened so strangely,--and we are surrounded here by influences
that compel conventionality. I cannot speak to you as frankly as I
would under other circumstances. It is easy for YOU to be yourself;-
-you have gained the mastery over all lesser forces than your own.
But with me it is different--perhaps when I am away I shall be able
to think more calmly--"

"You are going away?" he asked, gently.

"Yes. It is better so."

He remained silent. I went on, quickly.

"I am going away because I feel inadequate and unable to cope with
my present surroundings. I have had some experience of the same
influences before--I know I have--"

"I also!" he interrupted.

"Well, you must realise this better than I," and I looked at him now
with greater courage--"and if you have, you know they have led to
trouble. I want you to help me."

"I? To help you?" he said. "How can I help you when you leave me?"

There was something infinitely sad in his voice,--and the old fear
came over me like a chill--'lest I should lose what I had gained!'

"If I leave you," I said, tremblingly--"I do so because I am not
worthy to be with you! Oh, can you not see this in me?" For as I
spoke he took my hand in his and held it with a kindly clasp--"I am
so self-willed, so proud, so unworthy! There are a thousand things I
would say to you, but I dare not--not here, or now!"

"No one will approach us," he said, still holding my hand--"I am
keeping the others, unconsciously to themselves, at a distance till
you have finished speaking. Tell me some of these thousand things!"

I looked up at him and saw the deep lustre of his eyes filled with a
great tenderness. He drew me a little closer to his side.

"Tell me," he persisted, softly--"Is there very much that we do not,
if we are true to each other, know already?"

"YOU know more than I do!" I answered--"And I want to be equal with
you! I do! I cannot be content to feel that I am groping in the dark
weakly and blindly while you are in the light, strong and self-
contained! You can help me--and you WILL help me! You will tell me
where I should go and study as you did with Aselzion!"

He started back, amazed.

"With Aselzion! Dear, forgive me! You are a woman! It is impossible
that you should suffer so great an ordeal,--so severe a strain! And
why should you attempt it? If you would let me, I would be
sufficient for you." "But I will not let you!" I said, quickly,
roused to a kind of defiant energy--"I wish to go to the very source
of your instruction, and then I shall see where I stand with regard
to you! If I stay here now--"

"It will be the same old story over again!" he said--"Love--and
mistrust! Then drifting apart in the same weary way! Is it not
possible to avoid the errors of the past?"

"No!" I said, resolutely--"For me it is not possible! I cannot yield
to my own inward promptings. They offer me too much happiness! I
doubt the joy,--I fear the glory!"

My voice trembled--the very clasp of his hand unnerved me.

"I will tell you," he said, after a brief pause, "what you feel. You
are perfectly conscious that between you and myself there is a tie
which no power, earthly or heavenly, can break,--but you are living
in a matter-of-fact world with matter-of-fact persons, and the
influence they exert is to make you incredulous of the very truths
which are an essential part of your spiritual existence. I
understand all this. I understand also why you wish to go to the
House of Aselzion, and you shall go--"

I uttered an exclamation of relief and pleasure. His eyes grew dark
with earnest gravity as he looked at me.

"You are pleased at what you cannot realise," he said, slowly--"If
you go to the House of Aselzion--and I see you are determined--it
will be a matter of such vital import that it can only mean one of
two things,--your entire happiness or your entire misery. I cannot
contemplate with absolute calmness the risk you run,--and yet it is
better that you should follow the dictates of your own soul than be
as you are now--irresolute,--uncertain of yourself and ready to lose
all you have gained!"

'To lose all I have gained.' The old insidious terror! I met his
searching gaze imploringly.

"I must not lose anything!" I said, and my voice sank lower,--"I
cannot bear--to lose YOU!"

His hand closed on mine with a tighter grasp.

"Yet you doubt!" he said, softly.

"I must KNOW!" I said, resolutely.

He lifted his head with a proud gesture that was curiously familiar
to me.

"So the old spirit is not dead in you, my queen," he said, smiling.
"The old indomitable will!--the desire to probe to the very centre
of things! Yet love defies analysis,--and is the only thing that
binds the Universe together. A fact beyond all proving--a truth
which cannot be expounded by any given rule or line but which is the
most emphatic force of life! My queen, it is a force that must
either bend or break you!"

I made no reply. He still held my hand, and we looked out together
on the shining expanse of the sea where there was no vessel visible
and where our schooner alone flew over the watery, moonlit surface
like a winged flame.

"In your working life," he continued, gently, "you have done much.
You have thought clearly, and you have not been frightened away from
any eternal fact by the difficulties of research. But in your living
life you have missed more than you will care to know. You have been
content to remain a passive recipient of influences--you have not
thoroughly learned how to combine and use them. You have overcome
altogether what are generally the chief obstacles in the way of a
woman's higher progress,--her inherent childishness--her delight in
imagining herself wronged or neglected,--her absurd way of attaching
weighty importance to the merest trifles--her want of balance, and
the foolish resentment she feels at being told any of her faults,--
this is all past in you, and you stand free of the shackles of sheer
stupidity which makes so many women impossible to deal with from a
man's standpoint, and which renders it almost necessary for men to
estimate them at a low intellectual standard. For even in the
supreme passion of love, millions of women are only capable of
understanding its merely physical side, while the union of soul with
soul is never consummated:

     Where is that love supreme
    In which souls meet? Where is it satisfied?
      En-isled on heaving sands
        Of lone desire, spirit to spirit cries,
        While float across the skies
      Bright phantoms of fair lands,
    Where fancies fade not and where dreams abide."

His voice dropped to the softest musical cadence, and I looked up.
He answered my look.

"Dear one!" he said, "You shall go to the House of Aselzion, and
with you will be the future!"

He let go my hand very gently--I felt a sudden sense of utter
loneliness.

"You do not--you will not misjudge me?" I said.

"I! Dear, I have made so many errors of judgment in the past and I
have lost you so many times, that I shall do nothing now which might
lose you again!"

He smiled, and for one moment I was impelled to throw hesitation to
the winds and say all that I knew in my inmost self ought to be
said,--but my rebellious will held me back, and I remained silent,--
while he turned away and rejoined the rest of the party, with whom
he was soon chatting in such a cheery, easy fashion that they
appeared to forget that there was anything remarkable about him or
about his wonderful vessel, which had now turned on her course and
was carrying us back to Loch Scavaig at a speed which matched the
fleetest wind. When she arrived at her former anchorage just
opposite the 'Diana,' we saw that all the crew of Mr. Harland's
yacht were on deck watching our movements, which must have been well
worth watching considering what an amazing spectacle the 'Dream'
made of herself and her glittering sails against the dark loch and
mountains,--so brilliant indeed as almost to eclipse the very moon.
But the light began to pale as soon as we dropped anchor, and very
soon faded out completely, whereupon the sailors hauled down canvas,
uttering musical cries as they pulled and braced it together. This
work done, they retired, and a couple of servants waited upon our
party, bringing wine and fruit as a parting refreshment before we
said good-night,--and once again the sweet voice of the Egyptian boy
singer smote upon our ears, with a prelude of harp-strings:

Good-night,--farewell! If it should chance that nevermore we meet,
Remember that the hours we spent together here were sweet!

Good-night,--farewell! If henceforth different ways of life we wend,
Remember that I sought to walk beside you to the end!

Good-night,--farewell! When present things are merged into the past,
Remember that I love you and shall love you to the last!

My heart beat with a quick and sudden agony of pain--was it, could
it be true that I was of my own accord going to sever myself from
one whom I knew,--whom I felt--to be all in all to me?

"Good-night!" said a low voice close to my ear.

I started. I had lost myself in a wilderness of thought and memory.
Santoris stood beside me.

"Your friends are going," he said,--"and I too shall be gone to-
morrow!"

A wave of desolation overcame me.

"Ah, no!" I exclaimed--"Surely you will not go--"

"I must," he answered, quietly,--"Are not YOU going? It has been a
joy to meet you, if only for a little while--a pause in the
journey,--an attempt at an understanding!--though you have decided
that we must part again."

I clasped my hands together in a kind of desperation.

"What can I do?" I murmured--"If I yielded now to my own impulses--"

"Ah! If you did"--he said, wistfully--"But you will not; and
perhaps, after all, it is better so. It is no doubt intended that
you should be absolutely certain of yourself this time. And I will
not stand in the way. Good-night,--and farewell!"

I looked at him with a smile, though the tears were in my eyes.

"I will not say farewell!" I answered.

He raised my hands lightly to his lips.

"That is kind of you!" he said--"and to-morrow you shall hear from
me about Aselzion and the best way for you to see him. He is
spending the summer in Europe, which is fortunate for you, as you
will not have to make so far a journey."

We broke off our conversation here as the others joined us,--and in
a very little while we had left the 'Dream' and were returning to
our own yacht. To the last, as the motor launch rushed with us
through the water, I kept my eyes fixed on the reposeful figure of
Santoris, who with folded arms on the deck rail of his vessel,
watched our departure. Should I never see him again, I wondered?
What was the strange impulse that had more or less moved my spirit
to a kind of opposition against his, and made me so determined to
seek out for myself the things that he assumed to have mastered? I
could not tell. I only knew that from the moment he had begun to
relate the personal narrative of his own studies and experiences, I
had resolved to go through the same training whatever it was, and
learn what he had learned, if such a thing were possible. I did not
think I should succeed so well,--but some new knowledge I felt I
should surely gain. The extraordinary attraction he exercised over
me was growing too strong to resist, yet I was determined not to
yield to it because I doubted both its cause and its effect. Love, I
knew, could not, as he had said, be analysed--but the love I had
always dreamed of was not the love with which the majority of
mankind are content--the mere physical delight which ends in
satiety. It was something not only for time, but for eternity. Away
from Santoris I found it quite easy to give myself up to the dream
of joy which shone before me like the mirage of a promised land,--
but in his company I felt as though something held me back and
warned me to beware of too quickly snatching at a purely personal
happiness.

We reached the 'Diana' in a very few minutes--we had made the little
journey almost in silence, for my companions were, or appeared to
be, as much lost in thought as I was. As we descended to our cabins
Mr. Harland drew me back and detained me alone for a moment.

"Santoris is going away to-morrow," he said--"He will probably have
set those wonderful sails of his and flown before daybreak. I'm
sorry!"

"So am I," I answered--"But, after all--you would hardly want him to
stay, would you? His theories of life are very curious and
upsetting, and you all think him a sort of charlatan playing with
the mysteries of earth and heaven! If he is able to read thoughts,
he cannot be altogether flattered at the opinion held of him by Dr.
Brayle, for example!"

Mr. Harland's brows knitted perplexedly.

"He says he could cure me of my illness," he went on,--"and Brayle
declares that a cure is impossible."

"You prefer to believe Brayle, of course?" I queried.

"Brayle is a physician of note," he replied,--"A man who has taken
his degree in medicine and knows what he is talking about. Santoris
is merely a mystic."

I smiled a little sadly.

"I see!" And I held out my hand to say good-night. "He is a century
before his time, and maybe it is better to die than forestall a
century."

Mr. Harland laughed as he pressed my hand cordially.

"Enigmatical, as usual!" he said--"You and Santoris ought to be
congenial spirits!"

"Perhaps we are!" I answered, carelessly, as I left him;--"Stranger
things than that have happened!"




XII

A LOVE-LETTER


To those who are ignorant of, or indifferent to, the psychic forces
working behind all humanity and creating the causes which evolve
into effect, it cannot but seem strange,--even eccentric and
abnormal,--that any one person, or any two persons for that matter,
should take the trouble to try and ascertain the immediate intention
and ultimate object of their lives. The daily routine of ordinary
working, feeding and sleeping existence, varied by little social
conventions and obligations which form a kind of break to the
persistent monotony of the regular treadmill round, should be, they
think, sufficient for any sane, well-balanced, self-respecting
creature,--and if a man or woman elects to stand out of the common
ruck and say: "I refuse to live in a chaos of uncertainties--I will
endeavour to know why my particular atom of self is considered a
necessary, if infinitesimal, part of the Universe,"--such an one is
looked upon with either distrust or derision. In matters of love
especially, where the most ill-assorted halves persist in fitting
themselves together as if they could ever make a perfect whole, a
woman is considered foolish if she gives her affections where it is
'not expedient'--and a man is looked upon as having 'ruined his
career' if he allows a great passion to dominate him, instead of a
calm, well-weighed, respectable sort of sentiment which has its
fitting end in an equally calm, well-weighed, respectable marriage.
These are the laws and observances of social order, excellent in
many respects, but frequently responsible for a great bulk of the
misery attendant upon many forms of human relationship. It is not,
however, possible to the ordinary mind to realise that somewhere and
somehow, every two component parts of a whole MUST come together,
sooner or later, and that herein may be found the key to most of the
great love tragedies of the world. The wrong halves mated,--the
right halves finding each other out and rushing together recklessly
and inopportunely because of the resistless Law which draws them
together,--this is the explanation of many a life's disaster and
despair, as well as of many a life's splendid attainment and
victory. And the trouble or the triumph, whichever it be, will never
be lessened till human beings learn that in love, which is the
greatest and most divine Force on earth or in heaven, the Soul, not
the body, must first be considered, and that no one can fulfil the
higher possibilities of his or her nature, till each individual unit
is conjoined with that only other portion of itself which is as one
with it in thought and in the intuitive comprehension of its higher
needs.

I knew all this well enough, and had known it for years, and it was
hardly necessary for me to dwell upon it, as I sat alone in my cabin
that night, too restless to sleep, and, almost too uneasy even to
think. What had happened to me was simply that I had by a curious
chance or series of chances been brought into connection again with
the individual Soul of a man whom I had known and loved ages ago. To
the psychist, such a circumstance does not seem as strange as it is
to the great majority of people who realise no greater force than
Matter, and who have no comprehension of Spirit, and no wish to
comprehend it, though even the dullest of these often find
themselves brought into contact with persons whom they feel they
have met and known before, and are unable to understand why they
receive such an impression. In my case I had not only to consider
the one particular identity which seemed so closely connected with
my own--but also the other individuals with whom I had become more
or less reluctantly associated,--Catherine Harland and Dr. Brayle
especially. Mr. Harland had, unconsciously to himself, been merely
the link to bring the broken bits of a chain together--his
secretary, Mr. Swinton, occupied the place of the always necessary
nonentity in a group of intellectually or psychically connected
beings,--and I was perfectly sure, without having any actual reason
for my conviction, that if I remained much longer in Catherine
Harland's company, her chance liking for me would turn into the old
hatred with which she had hated me in a bygone time,--a hatred
fostered by Dr. Brayle, who, plainly scheming to marry her and
secure her fortune, considered me in the way (as I was) of the
influence he desired to exercise over her and her father. Therefore
it seemed necessary I should remove myself,--moreover, I was
resolved that all the years I had spent in trying to find the way to
some of Nature's secrets should not be wasted--I would learn, I too,
what Rafel Santoris had learned in the House of Aselzion--and then
we might perhaps stand on equal ground, sure of ourselves and of
each other! So ran my thoughts in the solitude and stillness of the
night--a solitude and stillness so profound that the gentle push of
the water against the sides of the yacht, almost noiseless as it
was, sounded rough and intrusive. My port-hole was open, and I could
see the sinking moon showing through it like a white face in sorrow.
Just then I heard a low splash as of oars. I started up and went to
the sofa, where, by kneeling on the cushions. I could look through
the porthole. There, gliding just beneath me, was a small boat, and
my heart gave a sudden leap of joy as I recognised the man who rowed
it as Santoris. He smiled as I looked down,--then, standing up in
the boat, guided himself alongside, till his head was nearly on a
level with the port-hole. He put one hand on its edge.

"Not asleep yet!" he said, softly--"What have you been thinking of?
The moon and the sea?--or any other mystery as deep and
incomprehensible?"

I stretched out my hand and laid it on his with an involuntary
caressing touch.

"I could not leave you without another last word,"--he said--"And I
have brought you a letter"--he gave me a sealed envelope as he
spoke--"which will tell you how to find Aselzion. I myself will
write to him also and prepare him for your arrival. When you do see
him you will understand how difficult is the task you wish to
undertake,--and, if you should fail, the failure will be a greater
sadness to yourself than to me--for I could make things easier for
you--"

"I do not want things made easy for me,"--I answered quickly--"I
want to do all that you have done--I want to prove myself worthy at
least--"

I broke off,--and looked down into his eyes. He smiled.

"Well!" he said--"Are you beginning to remember the happiness we
have so often thrown away for a trifle?"

I was silent, though I folded my hand closer over his. The soft
white sleepy radiance of the moon on the scarcely moving water
around us made everything look dream-like and unreal, and I was
hardly conscious of my own existence for the moment, so completely
did it seem absorbed by some other influence stronger than any power
I had ever known.

"Here are we two,"--he continued, softly--"alone with the night and
each other, close to the verge of a perfect understanding--and yet--
determined NOT to understand! How often that happens! Every moment,
every hour, all over the world, there are souls like ours, barred
severally within their own shut gardens, refusing to open the doors!
They talk over the walls, through the chinks and crannies, and peep
through the keyholes--but they will not open the doors. How
fortunate am I to-night to find even a port-hole open!"

He turned up his face, full of light and laughter, to mine, and I
thought then, how easy it would be to fling away all my doubts and
scruples, give up the idea of making any more search for what
perhaps I should never find, and take the joy which seemed proffered
and the love which my heart knew was its own to claim! Yet something
still pulled me back, and not only pulled me back, but on and away--
something which inwardly told me I had much to learn before I dared
accept a happiness I had not deserved. Nevertheless some of my
thoughts found sudden speech.

"Rafel--" I began, and then paused, amazed at my own boldness in
thus addressing him. He drew closer to me, the boat he stood in
swaying under him.

"Go on!" he said, with a little tremor in his voice--"My name never
sounded so sweetly in my own ears! What is it you would have me do?"

"Nothing!" I answered, half afraid of myself as I spoke--"Nothing--
but this. Just to think that I am not merely wilful or rebellious in
parting from you for a little while--for if it is true--"

"If what is true?" he interposed, gently.

"If it is true that we are friends not for a time but for eternity"-
-I said, in steadier tones--"then it can only be for a little while
that we shall be separated. And then afterwards I shall be quite
sure--"

"Yes--quite sure of what you are sure of now!" he said--"As sure as
any immortal creature can be of an immortal truth! Do you know how
long we have been separated already?"

I shook my head, smiling a little.

"Well, I will not tell you!" he answered--"It might frighten you!
But by all the powers of earth and heaven, we shall not traverse
such distances apart again--not if I can prevent it!"

"And can you?" I asked, half wistfully.

"I can! And I will! For I am stronger than you--and the strongest
wins! Your eyes look startled--there are glimpses of the moon in
them, and they are soft eyes--not angry ones. I have seen them full
of anger,--an anger that stabbed me to the heart!--but that was in
the days gone by, when I was weaker than you. This time the position
has changed--and _I_ am master!"

"Not yet!" I said, resolutely, withdrawing my hand from his--"I
yield to nothing--not even to happiness--till I KNOW!"

A slight shadow darkened the attractiveness of his features.

"That is what the world says of God--'I will not yield till I know!'
But it is as plastic clay in His hands, all the time, and it never
knows!"

I was silent--and there was a pause in which no sound was heard but
the movement of the water under the little boat in which he stood.
Then--

"Good-night!" he said.

"Good-night!" I answered, and moved by a swift impulse, I stooped
and kissed the firm hand that rested so near me, gripping the edge
of the port-hole. He looked up with a sudden light in his eyes.

"Is that a sign of grace and consolation?" he asked, smiling--"Well!
I am content! And I have waited so long that I can wait yet a little
longer."

So speaking, he let go his hold from alongside the yacht, and in
another minute had seated himself in the boat and was rowing away
across the moonlit water. I watched him as every stroke of the oars
widened the distance between us, half hoping that he might look
back, wave his hand, or even return again--but no!--his boat soon
vanished like a small black speck on the sea, and I knew myself to
be left alone. Restraining with difficulty the tears that rose to my
eyes, I shut the port-hole and drew its little curtain across it--
then I sat down to read the letter he had left with me. It ran as
follows:

Beloved,--

I call you by this name as I have always called you through many
cycles of time,--it should sound upon your ears as familiarly as a
note of music struck in response to another similar note in far
distance. You are not satisfied with the proofs given you by your
own inner consciousness, which testify to the unalterable fact that
you and I are, and must be, as one,--that we have played with fate
against each other, and sometimes striven to escape from each other,
all in vain;--it is not enough for you to know (as you do know) that
the moment our eyes met our spirits rushed together in a sudden
ecstasy which, had we dared to yield to it, would have outleaped
convention and made of us no more than two flames in one fire! If
you are honest with yourself as I am honest with myself, you will
admit that this is so,--that the emotion which overwhelmed us was
reasonless, formless and wholly beyond all analysis, yet more
insistent than any other force having claim on our lives. But it is
not sufficient for you to realise this,--or to trace through every
step of the journey you have made, the gradual leading of your soul
to mine,--from that last night you passed in your own home, when
every fibre of your being grew warm with the prescience of coming
joy, to this present moment, even through dreams of infinite
benediction in which I shared--no!--it is not sufficient for you!--
you must 'know'--you must learn--you must probe into deeper
mysteries, and study and suffer to the last! Well, if it must be so,
it must,--and I shall rely on the eternal fitness of things to save
you from your own possible rashness and bring you back to me,--for
without you now I can do nothing more. I have done much--and much
remains to be done--but if I am to attain, you must crown the
attainment--if my ambition is to find completion, you alone can be
its completeness. If you have the strength and the courage to face
the ordeal through which Aselzion sends those who seek to follow his
teaching, you will indeed have justified your claim to be considered
higher than merest woman,--though you have risen above that level
already. The lives of women generally, and of men too, are so small
and sordid and self-centred, thanks to their obstinate refusal to
see anything better or wider than their own immediate outlook, that
it is hardly worth while considering them in the light of that
deeper knowledge which teaches of the REAL life behind the seeming
one. In the ordinary way of existence men and women meet and mate
with very little more intelligence or thought about it than the
lower animals; and the results of such meeting and mating are seen
in the degenerate and dying nations of to-day. Moreover, they are
content to be born for no other visible reason than to die--and no
matter how often they may be told there is no such thing as death,
they receive the assertion with as much indignant incredulity as the
priesthood of Rome received Galileo's assurance that the earth moves
round the sun. But we--you and I--who know that life, being ALL
Life, CANNOT die,--ought to be wiser in our present space of time
than to doubt each other's infinite capability for love and the
perfect world of beauty which love creates. _I_ do not doubt--my
doubting days are past, and the whips of sorrow have lashed me into
shape as well as into strength, but YOU hesitate,--because you have
been rendered weak by much misunderstanding. However, it has
partially comforted me to place the position fully before you, and
having done this I feel that you must be free to go your own way. I
do not say 'I love you!'--such a phrase from me would be merest
folly, knowing that you must be mine, whether now or at the end of
many more centuries. Your soul is deathless as mine is--it is
eternally young, as mine is,--and the force that gives us life and
love is divine and indestructible, so that for us there can be no
end to the happiness which is ours to claim when we will. For the
rest I leave you to decide--you will go to the House of Aselzion and
perhaps you will remain there some time,--at any rate when you
depart from thence you will have learned much, and you will know
what is best for yourself and for me.

My beloved, I commend you to God with all my adoring soul and am

Your lover, Rafel Santoris

A folded paper fell out of this letter,--it contained full
instructions as to the way I should go on the journey I intended to
make to the mysterious House of Aselzion--and I was glad to find
that I should not have to travel as far as I had at first imagined.
I began at once to make my plans for leaving the Harlands as soon as
possible, and before going to bed I wrote to my friend Francesca,
who I knew would certainly expect me to visit her in Inverness-shire
as soon as my cruise in the Harlands' yacht was over, and briefly
stated that business of an important nature called me abroad for two
or three weeks, but that I fully anticipated being at home in
England again before the end of October. As it was now just verging
on the end of August, I thought I was allowing myself a fairly wide
margin for absence. When I had folded and sealed my letter ready for
posting, an irresistible sense of sleep came over me, and I yielded
to it gratefully. I found myself too overcome by it even to think,--
and I laid my head down upon the pillows with a peaceful
consciousness that all was well,--that all would be well--and that
in trying to make sure of the intentions of Fate towards me both in
life and love, I could not be considered as altogether foolish. Of
course, judged by the majority of people, I know I am already
counted as worse than foolish for the impressions and experiences I
here undertake to narrate, but that kind of judgment does not affect
me, seeing that their own daily and hourly folly is so visibly
pronounced and has such unsatisfactory and frequently disastrous
results, that mine--if it indeed be folly to choose lasting and
eternal things rather than ephemeral and temporal ones,--cannot but
seem light in comparison. Love, as the world generally conceives of
it, is hardly worth having--for if we become devoted to persons who
must in time be severed from us by death or other causes, we have
merely wasted the wealth of our affections. Only as a perfect,
eternal, binding force is love of any value,--and unless one can be
sure in one's own self that there is the strength and truth and
courage to make it thus perfect, eternal and binding, it is better
to have nothing to do with what after all is the divinest of divine
passions,--the passion of creativeness, from which springs all
thought, all endeavour, all accomplishment.

When I woke the next morning I did not need to be told that the
'Dream' had set her wonderful sails and flown. A sense of utter
desolation was in the air, and my own loneliness was impressed upon
me with overwhelming bitterness and force. It was a calm, brilliant
morning, and when I went up on deck the magnificent scenery of Loch
Scavaig was, to my thinking, lessened in effect by the excessive
glare of the sun. The water was smooth as oil, and where the 'Dream'
had been anchored, showing her beautiful lines and tapering spars
against the background of the mountains, there was now a dreary
vacancy. The whole scene looked intolerably dull and lifeless, and I
was impatient to be away from it. I said as much at breakfast, a
meal at which Catherine Harland never appeared, and where I was
accustomed to take the head of the table, at Mr. Harland's request,
to dispense the tea and coffee. Dr. Brayle seemed malignly amused at
my remark.

"The interest of the place has evidently vanished with Mr. Santoris,
so far as you are concerned!" he said--"He is certainly a remarkable
man, and owns a remarkable yacht--but beyond that I am not sure that
his room is not better than his company."

"I daresay you feel it so,"--said Mr. Harland, who had for some
moments been unusually taciturn and preoccupied--"Your theories are
diametrically opposed to his, and, for that matter, so are mine. But
I confess I should like to have tested his medical skill--he assured
me positively that he could cure me of my illness in three months."

"Why do you not let him try?" suggested Brayle, with an air of
forced lightness--"He will be a man of miracles if he can cure what
the whole medical profession knows to be incurable. But I'm quite
willing to retire in his favour, if you wish it."

Mr. Harland's bristling eyebrows met over his nose in a saturnine
frown.

"Well, are you willing?" he said--"I rather doubt it! And if you
are, I'm not. I've no faith in mysticism or psychism of any kind. It
bores me to think about it. And nothing has puzzled me at all
concerning Santoris except his extraordinarily youthful appearance.
That is a problem to me,--and I should like to solve it."

"He looks about thirty-eight or forty,"--said Brayle, "And I should
say that is his age." "That his age!" Mr. Harland gave a short,
derisive laugh--"Why, he's over sixty if he's a day! That's the
mystery of it. There is not a touch of 'years' about him. Instead of
growing old, he grows young."

Brayle looked up quizzically at his patron.

"I've already hinted," he said, "that he may not be the Santoris you
knew at Oxford. He may be a relative, cleverly masquerading as the
original man--"

"That won't stand a moment's argument," interposed Mr. Harland--"And
I'll tell you how I know it won't. We had a quarrel once, and I
slashed his arm with a clasp-knife pretty heavily." Here a sudden
quiver of something,--shame or remorse perhaps--came over his hard
face and changed its expression for a moment. "It was all my fault--
I had a devilish temper, and he was calm--his calmness irritated
me;--moreover, I was drunk. Santoris knew I was drunk,--and he
wanted to get me home to my rooms and to bed before I made too great
a disgrace of myself--then--THAT happened. I remember the blood
pouring from his arm--it frightened me and sobered me. Well, when he
came on board here the other night he showed me the scar of the very
wound I had inflicted. So I know he's the same man."

We all sat silent.

"He was always studying the 'occult'"--went on Mr. Harland--"And I
was scarcely surprised that he should 'think out' that antique piece
of jewellery from your pocket last night. He actually told me it
belonged to you ages ago, when you were quite another and more
important person!"

Dr. Brayle laughed loudly, almost boisterously.

"What a fictionist the man must be!" he exclaimed. "Why doesn't he
write a novel? Mr. Swinton, I wish you would take a few notes for me
of what Mr. Santoris said about that collar of jewels,--I should
like to keep the record."

Mr. Swinton smiled an obliging assent.

"I certainly will,"--he said. "I was fortunately present when Mr.
Santoris expressed his curious ideas about the jewels to Mr.
Harland."

"Oh, well, if you are going to record it,"--said Mr. Harland, half
laughingly--"you had better be careful to put it all down. The
collar--according to Santoris--belonged to Dr. Brayle when his
personality was that of an Italian nobleman residing in Florence
about the year 1537--he wore it on one unfortunate occasion when he
murdered a man, and the jewels have not had much of a career since
that period. Now they have come back into his possession--"

"Father, who told you all this?"

The voice was sharp and thin, and we turned round amazed to see
Catherine standing in the doorway of the saloon, white and
trembling, with wild eyes looking as though they saw ghosts. Dr.
Brayle hastened to her.

"Miss Harland, pray go back to your cabin--you are not strong
enough--"

"What's the matter, Catherine?" asked her father--"I'm only
repeating some of the nonsense Santoris told me about that collar of
jewels--"

"It's not nonsense!" cried Catherine. "It's all true! I remember it
all--we planned the murder together--he and I!"--and she pointed to
Dr. Brayle--" I told him how the lovers used to meet in secret,--the
poor hunted things!--how he--that great artist he patronised--came
to her room from the garden entrance at night, and how they talked
for hours behind the rose-trees in the avenue--and she--she!--I
hated her because I thought you loved her--YOU!" and again she
turned to Dr. Brayle, clutching at his arm--"Yes--I thought you
loved her!--but she--she loved HIM!--and--" here she paused,
shuddering violently, and seemed to lose herself in chaotic ideas--
"And so the yacht has gone, and there is peace!--and perhaps we
shall forget again!--we were allowed to forget for a little while,
but it has all come back to haunt and terrify us--"

And with these words, which broke off in a kind of inarticulate cry,
she sank downward in a swoon, Dr. Brayle managing to save her from
falling quite to the ground.

Everything was at once in confusion, and while the servants were
busy hurrying to and fro for cold water, smelling salts and other
reviving cordials, and Catherine was being laid on the sofa and
attended to by Dr. Brayle, I slipped away and went up on deck,
feeling myself quite overpowered and bewildered by the suddenness
and strangeness of the episodes in which I had become involved. In a
minute or two Mr. Harland followed me, looking troubled and
perplexed.

"What does all this mean?" he said--"I am quite at a loss to
understand Catherine's condition. She is hysterical, of course,--but
what has caused it? What mad idea has she got into her head about a
murder?"

I looked away from him across the sunlit expanse of sea.

"I really cannot tell you," I said, at last--"I am quite as much in
the dark as you are. I think she is overwrought, and that she has
perhaps taken some of the things Mr. Santoris said too much to
heart. Then"--here I hesitated--"she said the other day that she was
tired of this yachting trip--in fact, I think it is simply a case of
nerves."

"She must have very odd nerves if they persuade her to believe that
she and Brayle committed a murder together ages ago"--said Mr.
Harland, irritably;--"I never heard of such nonsense in all my
life!"

I was silent.

"I have told Captain Derrick to weigh anchor and get out of this,"--
he continued, brusquely. "We shall make for Portree at once. There
is something witch-like and uncanny about the place"--and he looked
round as he spoke at the splendour of the mountains, shining with
almost crystalline clearness in the glory of the morning sun--"I
feel as if it were haunted!"

"By what?" I asked.

"By memories," he answered--"And not altogether pleasant ones!"

I looked at him, and a moment's thought decided me that the
opportunity had come for me to broach the subject of my intended
departure, and I did so. I said that I felt I had allowed myself
sufficient holiday, and that it would be necessary for me to take
the ordinary steamer from Portree the morning after our arrival
there in order to reach Glasgow as soon as possible. Mr. Harland
surveyed me inquisitively.

"Why do you want to go by the steamer?" he asked--"Why not go with
us back to Rothesay, for example?"

"I would rather lose no time,"--I said--then I added impulsively:--
"Dear Mr. Harland, Catherine will be much better when I am gone--I
know she will! You will be able to prolong the yachting trip which
will benefit your health,--and I should be really most unhappy if
you curtailed it on my account--"

He interrupted me.

"Why do you say that Catherine will be better when you are gone?" he
demanded--"It was her own most particular wish that you should
accompany us."

"She did not know what moved her to such a desire," I said,--then,
seeing his look of astonishment, I smiled; "I am not a congenial
spirit to her, nor to any of you, really! but she has been most
kind, and so have you--and I thank you ever so much for all you have
done for me--you have done much more than you know!--only I feel it
is better to go now--now, before--"

"Before what?" he asked.

"Well, before we all hate each other!" I said, playfully--"It is
quite on the cards that we shall come to that! Dr. Brayle thinks my
presence quite as harmful to Catherine as that of Mr. Santoris;--I
am full of 'theories' which he considers prejudicial,--and so,
perhaps, they ARE--to HIM!"

Mr. Harland drew closer to me where I stood leaning against the deck
rail and spoke in a lower tone.

"Tell me," he said,--"and be perfectly frank about it--what is it
you see in Brayle that rouses such a spirit of antagonism in you?"

"If I give you a straight answer, such as I feel to be the truth in
myself, will you be offended?" I asked.

He shook his head.

"No"--he answered--"I shall not be offended. I simply want to know
what you think, and I shall remember what you say and see if it
proves correct."

"Well, in the first place," I said--"I see nothing in Dr. Brayle but
what can be seen in hundreds of worldly-minded men such as he. But
he is not a true physician, for he makes no real effort to cure you
of your illness, while Catherine has no illness at all that demands
a cure. He merely humours the weakness of her nerves, a weakness she
has created by dwelling morbidly on her own self and her own
particular miseries,--and all his future plans with regard to her
and to you are settled. They are quite clear and reasonable. You
will die,--in fact, it is, in his opinion, necessary for you to
die,--it would be very troublesome and inconvenient to him if, by
some chance, you were cured, and continued to live. When you are
gone he will marry Catherine, your only child and heiress, and he
will have no further personal anxieties. I dislike this self-seeking
attitude on his part, and my only wonder is that you do not perceive
it. For the rest, my antagonism to Dr. Brayle is instinctive and has
its origin far back--perhaps in a bygone existence!"

He listened to my words with attentive patience.

"Well, I shall study the man more carefully,"--he said, after a
pause;--"You may be right. At present I think you are wrong. As for
any cure for me, I know there is none. I have consulted medical
works on the subject and am perfectly convinced that Brayle is doing
his best. He can do no more. And now one word to yourself;"--here he
laid a hand kindly on mine--"I have noticed--I could not help
noticing that you were greatly taken by Santoris--and I should
almost have fancied him rather fascinated by you had I not known him
to be absolutely indifferent to womenkind. But let me tell you he is
not a safe friend or guide for anyone. His theories are extravagant
and impossible--his idea that there is no death, for example, when
death stares us in the face every day, is perfectly absurd--and he
is likely to lead you into much perplexity, the more so as you are
too much of a believer in occult things already. I wish I could
persuade you to listen to me seriously on one or two points--"

I smiled. "I am listening!" I said.

"Well, child, you listen perhaps, but you are not convinced.
Realise, if you can, that these fantastic chimeras of a past and
future life exist only in the heated imagination of the abnormal
idealist. There is nothing beyond our actual sight and immediate
living consciousness;--we know we are born and that we die--but why,
we cannot tell and never shall be able to tell. We must try and
manage the 'In-Between,'--the gap dividing birth and death,--as best
we can, and that's all. I wish you would settle down to these facts
reasonably--you would be far better balanced in mind and action--"

"If I thought as you do,"--I interrupted him--"I would jump from
this vessel into the sea and let the waters close over me! There
would be neither use nor sense in living for an 'In-Between' leading
merely to nothingness."

He passed his hand across his brows perplexedly.

"It certainly seems useless,"--he admitted--"but there it is. It is
better to accept it than run amok among inexplicable infinities."

We were interrupted here by the sailors busying themselves in
preparations for getting the yacht under way, and our conversation
being thus broken off abruptly was not again resumed. By eleven
o'clock we were steaming out of Loch Scavaig, and as I looked back
on the sombre mountain-peaks that stood sentinel-wise round the
deeply hidden magnificence of Loch Coruisk, I wondered if my
visionary experience there had been only the work of my own excited
imagination, or whether it really had foundation in fact? The letter
from Santoris lay against my heart as actual testimony that he at
least was real--that I had met and known him, and that so far as
anything could be believed he had declared himself my 'lover'! But
was ever love so expressed?--and had it ever before such a far-off
beginning?

I soon ceased to perplex myself with futile speculations on the
subject, however, and as the last peaks of the Scavaig hills
vanished in pale blue distance I felt as if I had been brought
suddenly back from a fairyland to a curiously dull and commonplace
world. Everyone on board the 'Diana' seemed occupied with the
veriest trifles,--Catherine remained too ill to appear all day, and
Dr. Brayle was in almost constant attendance upon her. A vague sense
of discomfort pervaded the whole atmosphere of the yacht,--she was a
floating palace filled with every imaginable luxury, yet now she
seemed a mere tawdry upholsterer's triumph compared with the
exquisite grace and taste of the 'Dream'--and I was eager to be away
from her. I busied myself during the day in packing my things ready
for departure with the eagerness of a child leaving school for the
holidays, and I was delighted when we arrived at Portree and
anchored there that evening. It was after dinner, at about nine
o'clock, that Catherine sent for me, hearing I had determined to go
next morning. I found her in her bed, looking very white and feeble,
with a scared look in her eyes which became intensified the moment
she saw me.

"You are really going away?" she said, faintly--"I hope we have not
offended you?"

I went up to her, took her poor thin hand and kissed it.

"No indeed!"--I answered--"Why should I be offended?"

"Father is vexed you are going,"--she went on--"He says it is all my
silly nonsense and hysterical fancies--do you think it is?"

"I prefer not to say what I think,"--I replied, gently. "Dear
Catherine, there are some things in life which cannot be explained,
and it is better not to try and explain them. But believe me, I can
never thank you enough for this yachting trip--you have done more
for me than you will ever know!--and so far from being 'offended' I
am grateful!--grateful beyond all words!"

She held my hands, looking at me wistfully.

"You will go away,"--she said, in a low tone--"and we shall perhaps
never meet again. I don't think it likely we shall. People often try
to meet again and never do--haven't you noticed that? It seems fated
that they shall only know each other for a little while just to
serve some purpose, and then part altogether. Besides, you live in a
different world from ours. You believe in things that I can't even
understand--You think there is a God--and you think each human being
has a soul--"

"Are you not taught the same in your churches?" I interrupted.

She looked startled.

"Oh yes!--but then one never thinks seriously about it! You know
that if we DID think seriously about it we could never live as we
do. One goes to church for convention's sake--because it's
respectable; but suppose you were to say to a clergyman that if your
soul is 'immortal' it follows in reason that it must always have
existed and always will exist, he would declare you to be
'unorthodox.' That's where all the puzzle and contradiction comes
in--so that I don't believe in the soul at all."

"Are you sure you do not?" I enquired, meaningly.

She was silent. Then she suddenly broke out.

"Well, I don't want to believe in it! I don't want to think about
it! I'd rather not! It's terrible! If a soul has never died and
never will die, its burden of memories must be awful!--horrible!--no
hell could be worse!"

"But suppose they are beautiful and happy memories?" I suggested.

She shuddered.

"They couldn't be! We all fail somewhere."

This was true enough, and I offered no comment.

"I feel,"--she went on, hesitatingly--"that you are leaving us for
some undiscovered country--and that you will reach some plane of
thought and action to which we shall never rise. I don't think I am
sorry for this. I am not one of those who want to rise. I should be
perfectly content to live a few years in a moderate state of
happiness and then drop into oblivion--and I think most people are
like me."

"Very unambitious!" I said, smiling.

"Yes--I daresay it is--but one gets tired of it all. Tired of things
and people--at least I do. Now that man Santoris--"

Despite myself, I felt the warm blood flushing my cheeks.

"Yes? What of him?" I queried, lightly.

"Well, I can understand that HE has always been alive!" and she
turned her eyes upon me with an expression of positive dread--
"Immensely, actively, perpetually alive! He seems to hold some
mastery over the very air! I am afraid of him--terribly afraid! It
is a relief to me to know that he and his strange yacht have gone!"

"But, Catherine,"--I ventured to say--"the yacht was not really
'strange,'--it was only moved by a different application of
electricity from that which the world at present knows. You would
not call it 'strange' if the discovery made by Mr. Santoris were
generally adopted?"

She sighed.

"Perhaps not! But just now it seems a sort of devil's magic to me.
Anyhow, I'm glad he's gone. You're sorry, I suppose?"

"In a way I am,"--I answered, quietly--"I thought him very kind and
charming and courteous--no one could be a better host or a
pleasanter companion. And I certainly saw nothing 'devilish' about
him. As for that collar of jewels, there are plenty of so-called
'thought-readers' who could have found out its existence and said as
much of it as he did--"

She uttered a low cry.

"Don't speak of it!" she said--"For Heaven's sake, don't speak of
it!"

She buried her face in her pillow, and I waited silently for her to
recover. When she turned again towards me, she said--

"I am not well yet,--I cannot bear too much. I only want you to know
before you go away that I have no unkind feeling towards you,--
things seem pushing me that way, but I have not really!--and you
surely will believe me--"

"Surely!" I said, earnestly--"Dear Catherine, do not worry yourself!
These impressions of yours will pass."

"I hope so!" she said--"I shall try to forget! And you--you will
meet Mr. Santoris again, do you think?"

I hesitated.

"I do not know."

"You seem to have some attraction for each other," she went on--"And
I suppose your beliefs are alike. To me they are dreadful beliefs!--
worse than barbarism!"

I looked at her with all the compassion I truly felt.

"Why? Because we believe that God is all love and tenderness and
justice?--because we cannot think He would have created life only to
end in death?--because we are sure that He allows nothing to be
wasted, not even a thought?--and nothing to go unrecompensed, either
in good or in evil? Surely these are not barbarous beliefs?"

A curious look came over her face.

"If I believed in anything,"--she said--"I would rather be orthodox,
and believe in the doctrine of original sin and the Atonement."

"Then you would start with the idea that the supreme and all-wise
Creator could not make a perfect work!" I said--"And that He was
obliged to invent a scheme to redeem His own failure! Catherine, if
you speak of barbarism, this is the most barbarous belief of all!"

She stared at me, amazed.

"You would be put out of any church in Christendom for such a speech
as that!" she said.

"Possibly!" I answered, quietly--"But I should not and could not be
put out of God's Universe--nor, I am certain, would He reject my
soul's eternal love and adoration!"

A silence fell between us. Then I heard her sobbing. I put my arm
round her, and she laid her head on my shoulder.

"I wish I could feel as you do,"--she whispered--"You must be very
happy! The world is all beautiful in your eyes--and of course with
your ideas it will continue to be beautiful--and even death will
only come to you as another transition into life. But you must not
think anybody will ever understand you or believe you or follow you-
-people will only look upon you as mad, or the dupe of your own
foolish imagination!"

I smiled as I smoothed her pillow for her and laid her gently back
upon it.

"I can stand that!" I said--"If somebody who is lost in the dark
jeers at me for finding the light, I shall not mind!"

We did not speak much after that--and when I said good-night to her
I also said good-bye, as I knew I should have to leave the yacht
early in the morning.

I spent the rest of the time at my disposal in talking to Mr.
Harland, keeping our conversation always on the level of ordinary
topics. He seemed genuinely sorry that I had determined to go, and
if he could have persuaded me to stay on board a few days longer I
am sure he would have been pleased.

"I shall see you off in the morning,"--he said--"And believe me I
shall miss you very much. We don't agree on certain subjects--but I
like you all the same."

"That's something!" I said, cheerfully--"It would never do if we
were all of the same opinion!"

"Will you meet Santoris again, do you think?"

This was the same question Catherine had put to me, and I answered
it in the same manner.

"I really don't know!"

"Would you LIKE to meet him again?" he urged.

I hesitated, smiling a little.

"Yes, I think so!"

"It is curious," he pursued--"that I should have been the means of
bringing you together. Your theories of life and death are so alike
that you must have thoughts in common. Many years have passed since
I knew Santoris--in fact, I had completely lost sight of him, though
I had never forgotten his powerful personality--and it seemt rather
odd to me that he should suddenly turn up again while you were with
me--"

"Mere coincidence,"--I said, lightly--"and common enough, after all.
Like attracts like, you know."

"That may be. There is certainly something in the law of attraction
between human beings which we do not understand,"--he answered,
musingly--"Perhaps if we did--"

He broke off and relapsed into silence.

That night, just before going to bed, I was met by Dr. Brayle in the
corridor leading to my cabin. I was about to pass him with a brief
good-night, but he stopped me.

"So you are really going to-morrow!" he said, with a furtive
narrowing of his eyelids as he looked at me--"Well! Perhaps it is
best! You are a very disturbing magnet."

I smiled.

"Am I? In what way?"

"I cannot tell you without seeming to give the lie to reason,"--he
answered, brusquely. "I believe to a certain extent in magnetism--in
fact, I have myself tested its power in purely nervous patients,--
but I have never accepted the idea that persons can silently and
almost without conscious effort, influence others for either malign
or beneficial purposes. In your presence, however, the thing is
forced upon me as though it were a truth, while I know it to be a
fallacy."

"Isn't it too late to talk about such things to-night?" I asked,
wishing to cut short the conversation.

"Perhaps it is--but I shall probably never have the chance to say
what I wish to say,"--he replied,--and he leaned against the
stairway just where the light in the saloon sent forth a bright ray
upon his face, showing it to be dark with a certain frowning
perplexity--"You have studied many things in your own impulsive
feminine fashion, and you are beyond all the stupidity of the would-
be agreeable female who thinks a prettily feigned ignorance
becoming, so that I can speak frankly. I can now tell you that from
the first day I saw you I felt I had known you before--and you
filled me with a curious emotion of mingled liking and repulsion.
One night when you were sitting with us on deck--it was before we
met that fellow Santoris--I watched you with singular interest--
every turn of your head, every look of your eyes seemed familiar--
and for a moment I--I almost loved you! Oh, you need not mind my
saying this!"--and he laughed a little at my involuntary
exclamation--"it was nothing--it was only a passing mood,--for in
another few seconds I hated you as keenly! There you have it. I do
not know why I should have been visited by these singular
experiences--but I own they exist--that is why I am rather glad you
are going."

"I am glad, too,"--I said--and I held out my hand in parting--"I
should not like to stay where my presence caused a moment's
uneasiness or discomfort."

"That's not putting it quite fairly,"--he answered, taking my
offered hand and holding it loosely in his own--"But you are an
avowed psychist, and in this way you are a little 'uncanny.' I
should not like to offend you--"

"You could not if you tried," I said, quickly.

"That means I am too insignificant in your mind to cause offence,"--
he observed--"I daresay I am. I live on the material plane and am
content to remain there. You are essaying very high flights and
ascending among difficulties of thought and action which are
entirely beyond the useful and necessary routine of life,--and in
the end these things may prove too much for you." Here he dropped my
hand. "You bring with you a certain atmosphere which is too rarefied
for ordinary mortals--it has the same effect as the air of a very
high mountain on a weak heart--it is too strong--one loses breath,
and the power to think coherently. You produce this result on Miss
Harland, and also to some extent on me--even slightly on Mr.
Harland,--and poor Swinton alone does not fall under the spell,
having no actual brain to impress. You need someone who is
accustomed to live in the same atmosphere as yourself to match you
in your impressions and opinions. We are on a different range of
thought and feeling and experience--and you must find us almost
beyond endurance--"

"As you find me!" I interposed, smiling.

"I will not say that--no! For there seems to have been a time when
we were all on the same plane--"

He paused, and there was a moment's tense silence. The little
silvery chime of a clock in the saloon struck twelve.

"Good-night, Dr. Brayle!" I said.

He lifted his brooding eyes and looked at me.

"Good-night! If I have annoyed you by my scepticism in certain
matters, you must make allowances for temperament and pardon me. I
should be sorry if you bore me any ill-will--"

What a curious note of appeal there was in his voice! All at once it
seemed to me that he was asking me to forgive him for that long-ago
murder which I had seen reflected in a vision!--and my blood grew
suddenly heated with an involuntary wave of deep resentment.

"Dr. Brayle," I said,--"pray do not trouble yourself to think any
more about me. Our ways will always be apart, and we shall probably
never see each other again. It really does not matter to you in the
least what my feeling may be with regard to you,--it can have no
influence on either your present or your future. Friendships cannot
be commanded."

"You will not say," he interrupted me--"that you have no dislike of
me?"

I hesitated--then spoke frankly.

"I will not,"--I answered--"because I cannot!"

For one instant our eyes met--then came SOMETHING between us that
suggested an absolute and irretrievable loss--"Not yet!" he
murmured--"Not yet!" and with a forced smile, he bowed and allowed
me to pass to my cabin. I was glad to be there--glad to be alone--
and overwhelmed as I was by the consciousness that the memories of
my soul had been too strong for me to resist, I was thankful that I
had had the courage to express my invincible opposition to one who
had, as I seemed instinctively to realise, been guilty of an
unrepented crime.

That night I slept dreamlessly, and the next morning before seven
o'clock I had left the luxurious 'Diana' for the ordinary passenger
steamer plying from Portree to Glasgow. Mr. Harland kept his promise
of seeing me off, and expressed his opinion that I was very foolish
to travel with a crowd of tourists and other folk, when I might have
had the comfort and quiet of his yacht all the way; but he could not
move me from my resolve, though in a certain sense I was sorry to
say good-bye to him.

"You must write to us as soon as you get home,"--he said, at
parting--"A letter will find us this week at Gairloch--I shall
cruise about a bit longer."

I made no reply for the moment. He had no idea that I was not going
home at all, nor did I intend to tell him.

"You shall hear from me as soon as possible,"--I said at last,
evasively--" I shall be very busy for a time--"

He laughed.

"Oh, I know! You are always busy! Will you ever get tired, I
wonder?"

I smiled. "I hope not!"

With that we shook hands and parted, and within the next twenty
minutes the steamer had started, bearing me far away from the Isle
of Skye, that beautiful, weird and mystic region full of strange
legends and memories, which to me had proved a veritable wonderland.
I watched the 'Diana' at anchor in the bay of Portree till I could
see her no more,--and it was getting on towards noon when I suddenly
noticed the people on board the steamer making a rush to one side of
the deck to look at something that was evidently both startling and
attractive. I followed the crowd,--and my heart gave a quick throb
of delight when I saw poised on the sparkling waters the fairylike
'Dream'!--her sails white as the wings of a swan, and her cordage
gleaming like woven gold in the brilliant sunshine. She was a thing
of perfect beauty as she seemed to glide on the very edge of the
horizon like a vision between sky and sea. And as I pressed forward
among the thronging passengers to look at her, she dipped her flag
in salutation--a salutation I knew was meant for me alone. When the
flag ran up again to its former position, murmurs of admiration came
from several people around me--

"The finest schooner afloat!"--I heard one man remark--"They say she
goes by electricity as well as sailing power."

"She's often seen about here," said another--"She belongs to a
foreigner--some prince or other named Santoris."

And I watched and waited,--with unconscious tears in my eyes, till
the exquisite fairy vessel disappeared suddenly as though it had
become absorbed and melted into the sun; then all at once I thought
of the words spoken by the wild Highland 'Jamie' who had given me
the token of the bell-heather--"One way in and another way out! One
road to the West, and the other to the East, and round about to the
meeting-place!"

The meeting-place! Where would it be? I could only think and wonder,
hope and pray, as the waves spread their silver foaming distance
between me and the vanished 'Dream.'




XIII

THE HOUSE OF ASELZION


It is not necessary to enter into particular details of the journey
I now entered upon and completed during the ensuing week. My
destination was a remote and mountainous corner of the Biscayan
coast, situated a little more than three days' distance from Paris.
I went alone, knowing that this was imperative, and arrived without
any untoward adventure, scarcely fatigued though I had travelled by
night as well as by day. It was only at the end of my journey that I
found myself confronted by any difficulty, and then I had to realise
that though the 'Chateau d'Aselzion,' as it was called, was
perfectly well known to the inhabitants of the surrounding district,
no one seemed inclined to show me the nearest way there or even to
let me have the accommodation of a vehicle to take me up the steep
ascent which led to it. The Chateau itself could be seen from all
parts of the village, especially from the seashore, over which it
hung like a toppling crown of the fortress-like rock on which it was
erected.

"It is a monastery,"--said a man of whom I asked the way, speaking
in a curious kind of guttural patois, half French and half Spanish--
"No woman goes there."

I explained that I was entrusted with an important message.

He shook his head.

"Not for any money would I take you," he declared. "I should be
afraid for myself."

Nothing could move him from his resolve, so I made up my mind to
leave my small luggage at the inn and walk up the steep road which I
could see winding like a width of white ribbon towards the goal of
my desires. A group of idle peasants watched me curiously as I spoke
to the landlady and asked her to take care of my few belongings till
I either sent for them or returned to fetch them, to which
arrangement she readily consented. She was a buxom, pleasant little
Frenchwoman, and inclined to be friendly.

"I assure you, Mademoiselle, you will return immediately!" she said,
with a bright smile--"The Chateau d'Aselzion is a place where no
woman is ever seen--and a lady alone!--ah, mon Dieu!--impossible!
There are terrible things done there, so they say--it is a house of
mystery! In the daytime it looks as it does now--dark, as though it
were a prison!--but sometimes at night one sees it lit up as though
it were on fire--every window full of something that shines like the
sun! It is a Brotherhood that lives there,--not of the Church--ah
no! Heaven forbid!--but they are rich and powerful men--and it is
said they study some strange science--our traders serve them only at
the outer gates and never go beyond. And in the midnight one hears
the organ playing in their chapel, and there is a sound of singing
on the very waves of the sea! I beg of you, Mademoiselle, think well
of what you do before you go to such a place!--for they will send
you away--I am sure they will send you away!"

I smiled and thanked her for her well-meant warning.

"I have a message to give to the Master of the Brotherhood," I said-
-"If I am not allowed to deliver it and the gate is shut in my face,
I can only come back again. But I must do my best to gain an
entrance if possible."

And with these words I turned away and commenced my solitary walk. I
had arrived in the early afternoon and the sun was still high in the
heavens,--the heat was intense and the air was absolutely still. As
I climbed higher and higher, the murmuring noises of human life in
the little village I had left behind me grew less and less and
presently sank altogether out of hearing, and I became gradually
aware of the great and solemn solitude that everywhere encompassed
me. No stray sheep browsed on the burnt brown grass of the rocky
height I was slowly ascending--no bird soared through the dazzling
deep blue of the vacant sky. The only sound I could hear was the
soft, rhythmic plash of small waves on the beach below, and an
indefinite deeper murmur of the sea breaking through a cave in the
far distance. There was something very grand in the silence and
loneliness of the scene,--and something very pitiful too, so I
thought, about my own self, toiling up the rocky path in mingled
hope and fear towards that grim pile of dark stone towers and high
forbidding walls, where it was just possible I might meet with but a
discouraging reception. Yet with the letter from him who signed
himself 'Your lover' lying against my heart, I felt I had a talisman
to open doors even more closely barred. Nevertheless, my courage
gave way a little when I at last stood before the heavy iron gates
set in a lofty archway of stone through which I could see nothing
but cavernous blackness. The road I had followed ended in a broad
circular sweep opposite this archway, and a few tall pines twisted
and gnarled in bough and stem, as though the full force of many
storm winds had battered and bent them out of their natural shapes,
were the only relief to the barrenness of the ground. An iron chain
with a massive ring at the end suggested itself as the possible
means of pulling a bell or otherwise attracting attention; but for
some minutes I had not the boldness to handle it.

I stood gazing at the frowning portal with a sense of utter
loneliness and desolation,--the quick, resistless impulse that had
fired me to make the journey and which, as it were, had driven me
along by its own impetus, suddenly died away into a dreary
consciousness of inadequateness and folly on my own part,--and I
began to reproach myself for yielding so utterly to the casual
influence of one who, after all, must in a reasonable way be
considered a stranger. For what was Rafel Santoris to me? Merely an
old college friend of the man who for a fortnight had been my host,
and with whom he chanced to renew acquaintanceship during a yachting
tour. Anything more simple and utterly commonplace never occurred,--
yet, here was I full of strange impressions and visions, which were
possibly only the result of clever hypnotism, practised on me
because the hypnotist had possibly discovered in my temperament some
suitable 'subject' matter for an essay of his skill. And I had so
readily succumbed to his influence as to make a journey of hundreds
of miles to a place I had never heard of before on the chance of
seeing a man of whom I knew nothing!--except--that, according to
what Rafel Santoris had said of him, he was the follower of a great
psychic Teacher whom once I had known.

Such doubtful and darkening thoughts as these, chasing one another
rapidly through my brain, made me severely accuse myself of rash and
unpardonable folly in all I had done or was doing,--and I was almost
on the point of turning away and retracing my steps, when a sudden
ray of light, not of the sun, struck itself sharply as it were
before my eyes and hurt them with its blinding glitter. It was like
a whip of fire lashing my hesitating mind, and it startled me into
instant action. Without pausing further to think what I was about, I
went straight up to the entrance of the Chateau and pulled at the
iron chain. The gates swung open at once and swiftly, without sound-
-and I stepped into the dark passage within--whereupon they as
noiselessly closed again behind me. There was no going back now,--
and nerving myself to resolution, I walked quickly on through what
was evidently a long corridor with a lofty arched roof of massive
stone; it was dark and cool and refreshing after the great heat
outside, and I saw a faint light at the end towards which I made my
way. The light widened as I drew near, and an exclamation of relief
and pleasure escaped me as I suddenly found myself in a picturesque
quadrangle, divided into fair green lawns and parterres of flowers.
Straight opposite me as I approached, a richly carved double oaken
door stood wide open, enabling me to look into a vast circular domed
hall, in the centre of which a fountain sent up tall silver columns
of spray which fell again with a tinkling musical splash into a
sunken pool bordered with white marble, where delicate pale blue
water-lilies floated on the surface of the water. Enchanted by this
glimpse of loveliness, I went straight on and entered without
seeking the right of admission,--and then stood looking about me in
wonder and admiration. If this was the House of Aselzion, where such
difficult lessons had to be learned and such trying ordeals had to
be faced, it certainly did not seem like a house of penance and
mortification but rather of luxury. Exquisite white marble statues
were set around the hall in various niches between banked-up masses
of roses and other blossoms--many of them perfect copies of the
classic models, and all expressing either strength and resolution,
or beauty and repose. And most wonderful of all was the light, that
poured in from the high dome--I could have said with truth that it
was like that 'light which never was on sea or land.' It was not the
light of the sun, but something more softened and more intense, and
was totally indescribable.

Fascinated by the restful charm of my surroundings, I seated myself
on a marble bench near the fountain and watched the sparkle of the
water as it rose in rainbow radiance and fell again into the darker
shadows of the pool,--and I had for a moment lost myself in a kind
of waking dream,--so that I started with a shock of something like
terror when I suddenly perceived a figure approaching me,--that of a
man, clothed in white garments fashioned somewhat after the monastic
type, yet hardly to be called a monk's dress, though he wore a sort
of hood or cowl pulled partially over his face. My heart almost
stopped beating and I could scarcely breathe for nervous fear as he
came towards me with an absolutely noiseless tread,--he appeared to
be young, and his eyes, dark and luminous, looked at me kindly and,
as I fancied, with a touch of pity.

"You are seeking the Master?" he enquired, in a gentle voice--"He
has instructed me to receive you, and when you have rested for an
hour, to take you to his presence."

I had risen as he spoke, and his quiet manner helped me to recover
myself a little.

"I am not tired,"--I answered--"I could go to him at once--"

He smiled.

"That is not possible!" he said--"He is not ready. If you will come
to the apartment allotted to you I am sure you will be glad of some
repose. May I ask you to follow me?"

He was perfectly courteous in demeanour, and yet there was a certain
impressive authority about him which silently impelled obedience. I
had nothing further to demand or to suggest, and I followed him at
once. He preceded me out of the domed hall into a long stone
passage, where every sign of luxury, beauty or comfort disappeared
in cold vastness, and where at every few steps large white boards
with the word 'Silence!' printed upon them in prominent black
letters confronted the eyes. The way we had to go seemed long and
dreary and dungeon-like, but presently we turned towards an opening
where the sun shone through, and my guide ascended a steep flight of
stone stairs, at the top of which was a massive door of oak, heavily
clamped with iron. Taking a key from his girdle, he unlocked this
door, and throwing it open, signed to me to pass in. I did so, and
found myself in a plain stone-walled room with a vaulted roof, and
one very large, lofty, uncurtained window which looked out upon the
sea and sheer down the perpendicular face of the rock on which the
Chateau d'Aselzion was built. The furniture consisted of one small
camp bedstead, a table, and two easy chairs, a piece of rough
matting on the floor near the bed, and a hanging cupboard for
clothes. A well-fitted bathroom adjoined this apartment, but beyond
this there was nothing of modern comfort and certainly no touch of
luxury. I moved instinctively to the window to look out at the sea,-
-and then turned to thank my guide for his escort, but he had gone.
Thrilled with a sudden alarm, I ran to the door--it was locked! I
was a prisoner! I stood breathless and amazed;--then a wave of
mingled indignation and terror swept over me. How dared these people
restrain my liberty? I looked everywhere round the room for a bell
or some means of communication by which I could let them know my
mind--but there was nothing to help me. I went to the window again,
and finding it was like a French casement, merely latched in the
centre, I quickly unfastened and threw it open. The scent of the sea
rushed at me with a delicious freshness, reminding me of Loch
Scavaig and the 'Dream'--and I leaned out, looking longingly over
the wide expanse of glittering water just now broken into little
crests of foam by a rising breeze. Then I saw that my room was a
kind of turret chamber, projecting itself sheer over a great wall of
rock which evidently had its base in the bed of the ocean. There was
no escape for me that way, even if I had sought it. I drew back from
the window and paced round and round my room like a trapped animal--
angry with myself for having ventured into such a place, and
forgetting entirely my previous determination to go through all that
might happen to me with patience and unflinching nerve.

Presently I sat down on my narrow camp bed and tried to calm myself.
After all, what was the use of my anger or excitement? I had come to
the House of Aselzion of my own wish and will,--and so far I had
endured nothing difficult. Apparently Aselzion was willing to
receive me in his own good time--and I had only to wait the course
of events. Gradually my blood cooled, and in a few minutes I found
myself smiling at my own absurdly useless indignation. True, I was
locked up in my own room like a naughty child, but did it matter so
very much? I assured myself it did not matter at all,--and as I
accustomed my mind to this conviction I became perfectly composed
and quite at home in my strange surroundings. I took off my hat and
cloak and put them by--then I went into the bathroom and refreshed
my face with delicious splashes of cold water. The bathroom
possessed a full-length mirror fitted into the wall, a fact which
rather amused me, as I felt it must have been there always and could
not have been put up specially for me, so that it would seem these
mystic 'Brothers' were not without some personal vanity. I surveyed
myself in it with surprise as I took down my hair and twisted it up
again more tidily, for I had expected to look fagged and tired,
whereas my face presented a smiling freshness which was unexpected
and astonishing to myself. The plain black dress I wore was dusty
with travel--and I shook it as free as I could from railway
grimness, feeling that it was scarcely the attire I should have
chosen for an audience of Aselzion.

"However,"--I said to myself--"if he has me locked up like this, and
gives me no chance of sending for my luggage at the inn, I can only
submit and make the best of it."

And returning from the bathroom to the bedroom, I again looked out
of my lofty window across the sea. As I did so, leaning a little
over the ledge, something soft and velvety touched my hand;--it was
a red rose clambering up the turret just within my reach. Its
opening petals lifted themselves towards me like sweet lips turned
up for kisses, and I was for a moment startled, for I could have
sworn that no rose of any kind was there when I first looked out.
'One rose from all the roses in Heaven!' Where had I heard those
words? And what did they signify? Then--I remembered! Carefully and
with extreme tenderness, I bent over that beautiful, appealing
flower:

"I will not gather you!"--I whispered, following the drift of my own
dreaming fancy--"If you are a message--and I think you are I--stay
there as long as you can and talk to me! I shall understand!"

And so for a while we made silent friends with each other till I
might have said with the poet--'The soul of the rose went into my
blood.' At any rate something keen, fine and subtle stole over my
senses, moving me to an intense delight in merely being alive. I
forgot that I was in a strange place among strange men,--I forgot
that I was to all intents and purposes a prisoner--I forgot
everything except that I lived, and that life was ecstasy!

I had no very exact idea of the time,--my watch had stopped. But the
afternoon light was deepening, and long lines of soft amber and
crimson in the sky were beginning to spread a radiant path for the
descent of the sun. While I still remained at the window I suddenly
heard the rise and swell of deep organ music, solemn and sonorous;
it was as though the waves of the sea had set themselves to song.
Some instinct then told me there was someone in the room,--and I
turned round quickly to find my former guide in the white garments
standing silently behind me, waiting. I had intended to complain at
once of the way in which I had been imprisoned as though I were a
criminal--but at sight of his grave, composed figure I lost all my
hardihood and could say nothing. I merely stood still, attendant on
his pleasure. His dark eyes, gleaming from under his white cowl,
looked at me with a searching enquiry as though he expected me to
speak, but as I continued to keep silence, he smiled.

"You are very patient!" he said, quietly--"And that is well! The
Master awaits you."

A tremor ran through me, and my heart began to beat violently. I was
to have my wilful desires granted, then! I was actually to see and
speak with the man to whom Rafel Santoris owed his prolonged youth
and power, and under whose training he had passed through an ordeal
which had taught him some of the deepest mysteries of life! The
result of my own wishes seemed now so terrifying to me that I could
not have uttered a word had I tried, I followed my escort in
absolute silence;--once in my nervous agitation I slipped on the
stone staircase and nearly fell,--he at once caught me by the hand
and supported me, and the kindness and gentle strength of his touch
renewed my courage. His wonderful eyes looked steadily into mine.

"Do not be afraid!" he said, in a low tone--"There is really nothing
to fear!"

We passed the domed hall and its sparkling fountain, and in two or
three minutes came to a deep archway veiled by a portiere of some
rich stuff woven in russet brown and gold,--this curtain my guide
threw back noiselessly, showing a closed door. Here he came to a
standstill and waited--I waited with him, trying to be calm, though
my mind was in a perfect tumult of expectation mingled with doubt
and dread,--that closed door seemed to me to conceal some marvellous
secret with which my whole future life and destiny were likely to be
involved. Suddenly it opened,--I saw a beautiful octagonal room,
richly furnished, with the walls lined, so it appeared, from floor
to ceiling with books,--one or two great stands and vases of flowers
made flashes of colour among the shadows, and a quick upward glance
showed me that the ceiling was painted in fresco, then my guide
signed to me to enter.

"The Master will be with you in a moment,"--he said--"Please sit
down"--here he gave me an encouraging smile--"You are a little
nervous--try and compose yourself! You need not be at all anxious or
frightened!"

I tried to smile in response, but I felt far more ready to weep. I
was possessed by a sudden hopeless and helpless depression which I
could not overcome. My guide went away at once, and the door closed
after him in the same mysteriously silent fashion in which it had
opened. I was left to myself,--and I sat down on one of the numerous
deep easy chairs which were placed about the room, trying hard to
force myself into at least the semblance of quietude. But, after
all, what was the use of even assuming composure when the man I had
come to meet probably had the power to gauge the whole gamut of a
human being's emotion at a moment's notice? Instinctively I pressed
my hand against my heart and felt the letter my 'lover' had given
me--surely that was no dream?

I drew a long breath like a sigh, and turned my eyes towards the
window, which was set in a sort of double arch of stone, and which
showed me a garden stretching far away from the edges of soft lawns
and flower borders into a picturesque vista of woodland and hill. A
warmth of rosy light illumined the fair scene, indicating that the
glory of the sunset had begun. Impulsively I rose to go and look
out--then stopped--checked and held back by a swift compelling awe--
I was no longer alone. I was confronted by the tall commanding
figure of a man wearing the same white garments as those of my
guide,--a man whose singular beauty and dignity of aspect would have
enforced admiration from even the most callous and unobservant--and
I knew that I was truly at last in the presence of Aselzion.
Overpowered by this certainty, I could not speak--I could only look
and wonder as he drew near me. His cowl was thrown back, fully
displaying his fine intellectual head--his eyes, deep blue and full
of light, studied my face with a keen scrutiny which I could FEEL as
though it were a searching ray burning into every nook and cranny of
my heart and soul. The blood rushed to my cheeks in a warm wave--
then suddenly rallying my forces I returned him glance for glance.
Thus we moved, each on our own lines of spiritual attraction, closer
together; till presently a slight smile brightened the gravity of
his handsome features, and he extended both hands to me.

"You are welcome!" he said, in a voice that expressed the most
perfect music of human speech--"Rash and undisciplined as you are,
you are welcome!"

Timidly I laid my hands in his, grateful for the warm, strong clasp
he gave them,--then, all at once, hardly knowing how it happened, I
sank on my knees as before some saint or king, silently seeking his
blessing. There was a moment's deep stillness,--and he laid his
hands on my bowed head.

"Poor child!" he said, gently--"You have adventured far for love and
life!--it will be hard if you should fail! May all the powers of God
and Nature help you!"

This said, he raised me with an infinitely courteous kindness, and
placed a chair for me near a massive table-desk on which there were
many papers--some neatly tied up and labelled,--others lying about
in apparent confusion--and when we were both seated he began
conversation in the simplest and easiest fashion.

"You know, of course, that I have been prepared for your arrival
here,"--he said--"by one of my students, Rafel Santoris. He has been
seeking you for a long time, but now he has found you he is hardly
better off--for you are a rebellious child and unwilling to
recognise him--is it not so?"

I felt a little more courageous now, and answered him at once.

"I am not unwilling to recognise any true thing," I said--"But I do
not wish to be deceived--or to deceive myself."

He smiled.

"Do you not? How do you know that you have not been deceiving
yourself ever since your gradual evolvement from subconscious into
conscious life? Nature has not deceived you--Nature always takes
herself seriously--but you--have you not tried in various moods or
phases of existence, to do something cleverer than Nature?--to more
or less outwit her as it were? Come, come!--don't look so puzzled
about it!--you have only done what all so-called 'reasonable' human
beings do, and think themselves justified in doing. But now, in your
present state,--which is an advancement, and not a retrogression,--
you have begun to gain a little wider knowledge, with a little
deeper humility--and I am inclined to have great patience with you!"

I raised my eyes and was reassured by his kindly glance.

"Now, to begin with,"--he went on--"you should know at once that we
do not receive women here. It is against our rule and Order. We are
not prepared for them,--we do not want them. They are never more
than HALF souls!"

My heart gave an indignant bound,--but I held my peace. He looked
straight at me, while with one hand he put together a few stray
papers on his desk.

"Well, why do you not give me the obvious answer?" he queried--"Why
do you not say that if women are half souls, men are the same,--and
that the two halves must conjoin to make one? Foolish child!--you
need not burn with suppressed offence at what sounds a slighting
description of your sex--it is not meant as such. You ARE half
souls,--and the chief trouble with you is that you seldom have the
sense to see it, or to make any endeavour to form the perfect and
indivisible union,--a sacred task which is left in your hands.
Nature is for ever working to bring the right halves together,--man
is for ever striving to scatter them apart--and though it all comes
right at the last, as it must, there is no need for delay involving
either months or centuries. You women were meant to be the angels of
salvation, but instead of this you are the ruin of your own
'ideals.'"

I could offer no contradiction to this, for I felt it to be true.

"As I have just said," he went on--"this is no place for women. The
mere idea that you should imagine yourself, capable of submitting to
the ordeal of a student here is, on the face of it, incredible. Only
for Rafel's sake have I consented to see you and explain to you how
impossible it is that you should remain--"

I interrupted him.

"I MUST remain!" I said, firmly. "Do with me whatever you like--put
me in a cell and keep me a prisoner,--give me any hardship to endure
and I will endure it--but do not turn me away without teaching me
something of your peace and power--the peace and power which Rafel
possesses, and which I too must possess if I would help him and be
all in all to him--"

Here I paused, overcome by my own emotion. Aselzion looked full at
me.

"That is your desire?--to help him and to be all in all to him?" he
said--"Why did you not realise this ages ago? And even now you have
wavered in the allegiance you owe to him--you have doubted him,
though all your inward instincts tell you that he is your soul's
true mate, and that your own heart beats towards him like a bird in
a cage beating against the bars towards liberty!"

I was silent. My fate seemed in a balance,--but I left it to
Aselzion, who, if his power meant anything, could read my thoughts
better than I could express them. He rose from his desk and paced
slowly up and down, absorbed in meditation. Presently he stopped
abruptly in front of me.

"If you stay here," he said--"you must understand what it means. It
means that you must dwell as one apart in your own room, entirely
alone except when summoned to receive instruction--your meals will
be served there--and you will feel like a criminal undergoing
punishment rather than enlightenment--and you may speak to no one
unless spoken to first. Moreover"--he interrupted himself and
beckoned me to follow him into another room adjoining the one we
were in. Here, leading me to a window, he showed me a very different
view from the sunlit landscape and garden I had lately looked upon,-
-a dismal square of rank grass in which stood a number of black
crosses.

"These do not mark deaths,"--he said--"but failures! Failures--not
in a worldly sense--but failures in making of life the eternal and
creative thing it is--eternal HERE and now,--as long as we shall
choose! Do you seek to be one of them?"

"No,"--I answered, quietly--"I shall not fail!"

He gave a slight, impatient sigh.

"So they all said--they whose records are here"--and he pointed to
the crosses with an impressive gesture--"Some of the men who have
thus left their mark with us, are at this moment among the world's
most brilliant and successful personalities--wealthy, and in great
social request,--and only they themselves know where the canker
lies--only they are aware of their own futility,--and they live,
knowing that their life must lead into other lives, and dreading
that inevitable Change which is bound by law to bring them into
whatever position they have chiefly sought!"

His voice was grave and compassionate, and a faint tremor of fear
ran through me.

"These were--and are--MEN!"--he continued--"And you--a woman--would
boldly attempt the adventures in which they failed! Think for a
moment how weak and ignorant and all unprepared you are! When you
first began your psychic studies with a Teacher whom we both loved
and honoured--one whom you knew by the name of Heliobas--you had
scarcely lived at all in the world;--since then you have worked hard
and done much, but in your close application to the conquest of
difficulties you have missed many things by the way. I give you
credit for patience and faith--these have accomplished much for you-
-and now you are at a crucial point in your career when your Will,
like the rudder of a ship, trembles in your hand, and you are
plunging into unknown further deeps where there may be storm and
darkness. There is danger ahead for any doubting, proud, or
rebellious soul,--it is but fair to warn you!"

"I am not afraid!" I said, in a low tone--"I can but die!"

"Child, that is just what you cannot do! Grasp that fact firmly at
once and for ever! You cannot die,--there is no such thing as death!
If you could die and have done with all duties, cares, perplexities
and struggles altogether, the eternal problem would be greatly
simplified. But the idea of death is only one of a million human
delusions. Death is an impossibility in the scheme of Life--what is
called by that name is merely a shifting and re-investiture of
imperishable atoms. The endless varying forms of this shifting and
re-investiture of atoms is the secret we and our students have set
ourselves to master--and some of us have mastered it sufficiently to
control both the matter and spirit whereof we are made. But the way
of learning is not an easy way--Rafel Santoris himself could have
told you that he was all but overcome in the trial--for I spare no
one!--and if you persist in your rash intention I cannot spare you
simply because of your sex."

"I do not ask to be spared,"--I said, gently--"I have already told
you I will endure anything."

A slight smile crossed his face.

"So you will, I believe!" he answered--"In the old days I can well
understand your enduring martyrdom! I can see you facing lions in
the Roman arena,"--as he thus spoke I started, and the warm blood
rushed to my cheeks--"rather than not carry out your own fixed
resolve, whether such resolve was right or wrong! I can see you
preparing to drown yourself in the waters of the Nile rather than
break through man's stupid superstition and convention! Why do you
look so amazed? Am I touching on some old memory? Come, let us leave
these black embers of coward mortality and return to the more
cheerful room."

We re-entered the library together, and he seated himself again at
his desk, turning towards me with an air of settled and impressive
authority.

"What you want to learn,--and what every beginner in the study of
psychic law generally wants to learn first of all, is how to obtain
purely personal satisfaction and advantage,"--he said--"You want to
know three things--the secret of life--the secret of youth--the
secret of love! Thousands of philosophers and students have entered
upon the same research, and one perhaps out of the thousand has
succeeded where all the rest have failed. The story of Faust is
perpetually a thing of interest, because it treats of these secrets,
which according to the legend are only discoverable through the aid
of the devil. WE know that there is no devil, and that everything is
divinely ordained by a Divine Intelligence, so that in the deepest
researches which we are permitted to make there is nothing to fear--
but Ourselves! Failure is always brought about by the students, not
by the study in which they are engaged,--the reason of this being
that when they know a little, they think they know all,--with the
result that they become intellectually arrogant, an attitude that
instantly nullifies all previous attainment. The secret of life is a
comparatively easy matter to understand--the secret of youth a
little more difficult--the secret of love the most difficult of all,
because out of love is generated both the perpetuity of life and of
youth. Now your object in coming here is, down at the root of it,
absolutely personal--I will not say selfish, because that sounds
hard--and I will give you credit for the true womanly feeling you
have, that being conscious in your own soul of Rafel Santoris as
your superior and master as well as your lover, you wish to be
worthy of him, if only in the steadfastness and heroism of your
character. I will grant you all that. I will also grant that it is
perfectly natural, and therefore right, that you should wish to
retain youth and beauty and health for his sake,--and I would even
urge that this desire should be SOLELY for his sake! But just now
you are not quite sure whether it is for his sake,--you wish to
hold, for YOURSELF, the secret of life and the power of life's
continuance--the secret of youth and the power of youth's
continuance,--and you most certainly wish to have for yourself, as
well as for Rafel, the secret of love and the power of love's
continuance. None of these secrets can be disclosed to worldlings--
by which term I mean those who allow themselves to be moved from
their determination, and distracted by a thousand ephemeral matters.
I do not say you are such an one,--but you, like all who live in the
world, have your friends and acquaintances--people who are ready to
laugh at you and make mock of your highest aims--people whose
delight would be to block the way to your progress--and the question
with me is--Are you strong enough to ensure the mental strain which
will be put upon you by ignorant and vulgar opposition and even
positive derision? You may be,--you are self-willed enough, though
not always rightly so--for example, you want to gain knowledge apart
from and independently of Rafel Santoris, yet you are an incomplete
identity without him! The women of your day all follow this vicious
policy--the desire to be independent and apart from men--which is
the suicide of their nobler selves. None of them are complete
creatures without their stronger halves--they are like deformed
birds with only one wing,--and a straight flight is impossible to
them."

He ceased, and I looked up.

"Whether I agree with you or not hardly matters,"--I said--"I admit
all my faults and am ready to amend them. But I want to learn from
you all that I may--all that you think I am capable of learning--and
I promise absolute obedience--"

A slight smile lightened his eyes.

"And humility?"

I bent my head.

"And humility!"

"You are resolved, then?"

"I am resolved!"

He paused a moment, then appeared to make up his mind.

"So be it!" he said--"But on your own head be your own mischance, if
any mischance should happen! I take no responsibility. Of your own
will you have come here--of your own will you elect to stay here,
where there is no one of your own sex with whom you can communicate-
-and of your own will you must accept all the consequences. Is that
agreed?"

His steel-blue eyes flashed with an almost supernatural brilliancy
as he put the question, and I was conscious of a sense of fear. But
I conquered this and answered simply:

"It is agreed!"

He gave me a keen glance that swept me as it were from head to foot-
-then turning from me abruptly, struck a handle on his desk which
set a loud bell clanging in some outer corridor. My former guide
entered almost immediately, and Aselzion addressed him:

"Honorius,"--he said--"show this lady to her room, She will follow
the course of a probationer and student"--as he spoke, Honorius gave
me a look of undisguised amazement and pity--"The moment she desires
to leave, every facility for her departure is to be granted to her.
As long as she remains under instruction the rule for her, as you
know, is solitude and silence."

I looked at him, and thought how swiftly his face had changed. It
was no longer softened by the grave benevolence and kindness that
had sustained my courage,--a stern shadow darkened it, and his eyes
were averted. I saw I was expected to leave the room, but I
hesitated.

"You will let me thank you,"--I murmured, holding out my hands
timidly--almost pleadingly.

He turned to me slowly and took my hands in his own.

"Poor child, you have nothing to thank me for!"--he said. "Bear in
mind, as one of your first lessons in the difficult way you are
going, that you have nothing to thank anyone for, and nothing to
blame anyone for in the shaping of your destiny but--Yourself! Go!--
and may you conquer your enemy!"

"My enemy?" I repeated, wonderingly.

"Yes--again Yourself! The only power any man or woman has ever had,
or ever will have, to contend with!"

He dropped my hands, and I suppose I must have expressed some mute
appeal in my upward glance at him, for the faintest shadow of a
smile came on his lips.

"God be with you!" he said, softly, and then with a gentle gesture
signed to me to leave him. I at once obeyed, and followed the guide
Honorius, who led me back to my own room, where, without speaking a
word, he closed and locked the door upon me as before. To my
surprise, I found my luggage which I had left at the inn placed
ready for me--and on a small dresser set in a niche of the wall
which I had not noticed before, there was a plate of fruit and dry
bread, with a glass of cold water. On going to look at this little
refection, which was simply yet daintily set out, I saw that the
dresser was really a small lift, evidently connected with the
domestic offices of the house, and I concluded that this would be
the means by which all my meals would be served. I did not waste
much time in thinking about it, however,--I was only too glad to be
allowed to remain in the House of Aselzion on any terras, and the
fact that I was imprisoned under lock and key did not now trouble
me. I unpacked my few things, among which were three or four
favourite books,--then I sat down to my frugal repast, for which
hunger provided a keen appetite. When I had finished, I took a chair
to the open window and sat there, looking out on the sea. I saw my
friendly little rose leaning its crimson head against the wall just
below me with quite a confidential air, and it gave me a sense of
companionship, otherwise the solitude was profound. The sky was
darkening into night, though one or two glowing bars of deep crimson
still lingered as memories of the departed sun--and a pearly
radiance to the eastward showed a suggestion of the coming moon. I
felt the sense of deep environing silence closing me in like a wall-
-and looking back over my shoulder from the window to the interior
of my room it seemed full of drifting shadows, dark and impalpable.
I remembered I had no candle or any other sort of light--and this
gave me a passing uneasiness, but only for a moment. I could go to
bed, I thought, when I was tired of watching the sea. At any rate, I
would wait for the moonrise,--the scene I looked upon was divinely
peaceful and beautiful,--one that a painter or poet would have
revelled in--and I was content. I was not conscious of any fear,--
but I did feel myself being impressed as it were and gradually
overcome by the deepening stillness and great loneliness of my
surroundings. 'The rule for her is solitude and silence.' So had
said Aselzion. And evidently the rule was being enforced.




XIV

CROSS AND STAR


The moon rose slowly between two bars of dark cloud which gradually
whitened into silver beneath her shining presence, and a
scintillating pathway of diamond-like reflections began to spread
itself across the sea. I remained at the window, feeling an odd
disinclination to turn away into the darkness of my room. And I
began to think that perhaps it was rather hard that I should be left
all by myself locked up in this way;--surely I might have been
allowed a light of some sort! Then I at once reproached myself for
allowing the merest suggestion of a complaint to enter my mind, for,
after all, I was an uninvited guest in the House of Aselzion--I was
not wanted--and I remembered the order that had been issued
concerning me: 'The moment she desires to leave, every facility for
departure is to be granted to her.' I was much more afraid of this
'facility for departure' than I was of my present solitude, and I
determined to look upon the whole adventure in the best and most
cheerful light. If it was best I should be alone, then loneliness
was good--if it was necessary I should be in darkness, then darkness
was also agreeable to me.

Scarcely had I thus made up my mind to these conditions when my room
was suddenly illumined by a soft yet effulgent radiance-and I
started up in amazement, wondering where it came from. I could see
no lamps or electric burners,--it was as if the walls glowed with
some surface luminance. When my first surprise had passed, I was
charmed and delighted with the warm and comforting brightness around
me,--it rather reminded me of the electric brilliancy on the sails
of the 'Dream.' I moved away from the window, leaving it open, as
the night was very close and warm, and sat down at the table to read
a little, but after a few minutes laid the book aside to listen to a
strange whispering music that floated towards me, apparently from
the sea, and thrilled me to the soul. No eloquent description could
give any idea of the enthralling sweetness of the harmonies that
were more BREATHED upon the air than sounded--and I became absorbed
in following the rhythm of the delicious cadences as they rose and
fell. Then by degrees my thoughts wandered away to Rafel Santoris,--
where was he now?--in what peaceful expanse of shining waters had
his fairy vessel cast anchor? I pictured him in my brain till I
could almost see his face,--the broad brow,--the fearless, tender
eyes and smile--and I could fancy that I heard the deep, soft
accents of his voice, always so gentle when he spoke to me--me, who
had half resented his influence! And a quick wave of long pent-up
tenderness rose in my heart--my whole soul ran out, as it were, to
greet him with outstretched arms--I knew in my own consciousness
that he was more than all the world to me, and I said aloud:--"My
beloved, I love you! I love you!" to the silence, almost as if I
thought it could convey the words to him whom most I desired to hear
them.

Then I felt how foolish and futile it was to talk to the empty air
when I might have confessed myself to the real lover of my life face
to face, had I been less sceptical,--less proud! Was not my very
journey to the House of Aselzion a testimony of my own doubting
attitude?--for I had come, as I now admitted to myself, first to
make sure that Aselzion really existed--and secondly, to prove to my
own satisfaction that he was truly able to impart the mystical
secrets which Rafel seemed to know. I wearied myself out at last
with thinking to no purpose, and closing the window I undressed and
went to bed. As I lay down, the light in my room was suddenly
extinguished, and all was darkness again except for the moon, which
sent a clear white ray straight through the lattice, there being no
curtain to shut it out. For some time I remained awake on my hard
little couch, looking at this ray, and steadily refusing to allow
any sense of fear or loneliness to gain the mastery over me--the
music which had so enchanted me ceased--and everything was perfectly
still. And by and by my eyes closed--my tired limbs relaxed,--and I
fell into a sound and dreamless sleep.

When I awoke it was full morning, and the sunshine poured into my
room like a shower of gold. I sprang up, full of delight that the
night had passed so peacefully and that nothing strange or
terrifying had occurred, though I do not know why I should have
expected this. Everything seemed wonderfully fresh and beautiful in
the brightness of the new day, and the very plainness of my room had
a fascination greater than any amount of luxury. The only unusual
thing I noticed was that the soft cold water with which my bath was
supplied sparkled as though it were effervescent,--once or twice it
seemed to ripple with a diamond-like foam, and it was never actually
still. I watched its glittering movement for some minutes before
bathing--then, feeling certain it was charged with some kind of
electricity, I plunged into it without hesitation and enjoyed to the
utmost the delicious sense of invigoration it gave me. When my
toilet was completed and I had attired myself in a simple morning
gown of white linen, as being more suitable to the warmth of the
weather than the black one I had travelled in, I went to throw open
my window and let in all the freshness of the sea-air, and was
surprised to see a small low door open in the side of the turret,
through which I discovered a winding stair leading downward.
Yielding to the impulse of the moment, I descended it, and at the
end found myself in an exquisite little rock garden abutting on the
seashore. I could actually open a gate, and walk to the very edge of
the sea. I was no longer a prisoner, then!--I could run away if I
chose!

I looked about me--and smiled as I saw the impossibility of any
escape. The little garden belonged exclusively to the turret, and on
each side of it impassable rocks towered up almost to the height of
the Chateau d'Aselzion itself, while the bit of shore on which I
stood was equally hemmed in by huge boulders against which the waves
had dashed for centuries without making much visible impression. Yet
it was delightful to feel I was allowed some liberty and open air,
and I stayed for some minutes watching the sea and revelling in the
warmth of the southern sun. Then I retraced my steps slowly, looking
everywhere about me as I went, to see if there was anyone near. Not
a soul was in sight.

I returned to my room to find my bed made as neatly as though it had
never been slept upon,--and my breakfast, consisting of a cup of
milk and some wheaten biscuits, set out upon the table. I was quite
ready for the meal, and enjoyed it. When I had finished, I took my
empty cup and plate and put them on the dresser in the niche,
whereupon the dresser was instantly lowered, and very soon
disappeared. Then I began to wonder how I should employ myself. It
was no use writing letters, though I had my own travelling desk
ready for this purpose,--I did not wish my friends or acquaintances
to know where I was--and even if I had written to any of them it was
hardly likely that my correspondence would ever reach them. For I
felt sure the mystic Brotherhood of Aselzion would not allow me to
communicate with the outside world so long as I remained with them.
I sat meditating,--and I began to consider that several days passed
thus aimlessly would be difficult to bear. I could not keep correct
count of time, my watch having stopped, and there was no clock or
chime of any sort in the place that I could hear. The stillness
around me would have been oppressive but for the soft dash of little
waves breaking on the beach below my window. All at once, to my
great joy, the door of my room opened, and the personage called
Honorius entered. He bent his head slightly by way of salutation,
and then said briefly,--

"You are commanded to follow me."

I rose obediently, and stood ready. He looked at me intently and
with curiosity, as though he sought to read my mind. Remembering
that Aselzion had said I was not to speak unless spoken to, I only
returned his look steadfastly, and with a smile.

"You are not unhappy, or afraid, or restless,"--he said, slowly--
"That is well! You are making a good beginning. And now, whatever
you see or hear, keep silence! If you desire to speak, speak now--
but after we leave this room not a word must escape your lips--not a
single exclamation,--your business is to listen, learn and obey!"

He waited--giving me the opportunity to say something in reply--but
I preferred to hold my peace. He then handed me a folded length of
soft white material, opaque, yet fine and silky as gossamer.

"Cover yourself with this veil,"--he said--"and do not raise it till
you return here."

I unfolded it and threw it quickly over me--it was as delicate as a
filmy cloud and draped me from head to foot, effectually concealing
me from the eyes of others though I myself could see through it
perfectly. Honorius then signed to me to follow, and I did so, my
heart beating quickly with excitement and expectation.

We went through many passages with intricate turnings that seemed to
have no outlet,--it was like threading one's way through a maze--
till at last I found myself shut within a small cell-like place with
an opening in front of me through which I gazed upon a strange and
picturesque scene. I saw the interior of a small but perfectly
beautiful Gothic chapel, exquisitely designed, and lit by numerous
windows of stained glass, through which the sunlight filtered in
streams of radiant colour, patterning with gold, crimson and blue,
the white marble flooring below. Between every tapering column that
supported the finely carved roof, were two rows of benches, one
above the other, and here sat an array of motionless white figures,-
-men in the garb of their mysterious Order, their faces almost
concealed by their drooping cowls. There was no altar in this
chapel,--but at its eastern end where the altar might have been, was
a dark purple curtain against which blazed in brilliant luminance a
Cross and Seven-pointed Star. The rays of light shed by this
uplifted Symbol of an unwritten Creed were so vivid as to be almost
blinding, and nearly eclipsed the summer glory of the sun itself.
Awed by the strange and silent solemnity of my surroundings, I was
glad to be hidden under the folds of my enshrouding white veil,
though I realised that I was in a sort of secret recess made
purposely for the use of those who were summoned to see all that
went on in the chapel without being seen. I waited, full of eager
anticipation,--and presently the low vibrating sound of the organ
trembled on the air, gradually increasing in volume and power till a
magnificent rush of music poured from it like a sudden storm
breaking through clouds. I drew a long breath of pure ecstasy,--I
could have knelt and wept tears of gratitude for the mere sense of
hearing! Such music was divine!--the very idea of mortality was
swallowed up in it and destroyed, and the imprisoned soul mounted up
to the highest life on wings of light, rejoicing!

When it ceased, as it did all too soon, there followed a profound
silence,--so profound that I could hear the quick beating of my own
heart as if I were the only living thing in the place. I turned my
eyes towards the dazzling Cross and Star with its ever darting rays
of fiery brilliancy, and the effect of its perpetual sparkle of
lambent fire was as if an electric current were giving off messages
which no mortal skill would ever be able to decipher or put into
words, but which found their way to one's deepest inward
consciousness. All at once there was a slight movement among the
rows of white-garmented, white-cowled figures hitherto sitting so
motionless,--and with one accord they rose to their feet as a
figure, tall, stately and imposing, came walking slowly across the
chapel and stood directly in front of the flaming Symbol, holding
both hands outstretched as though invoking a blessing. It was the
Master, Aselzion,--Aselzion invested with such dignity and splendour
as I had never thought possible to man. He might have posed for some
god or hero,--his aspect was one of absolute power and calm self-
poise,--other men might entertain doubts of themselves at the
intention of their lives, but this one in his mere bearing expressed
sureness, strength and authority. He wore his cowl thrown back, and
from where I sat in my secluded corner I could see his features
distinctly, and could watch the flash of his fine steadfast eyes as
he turned them upon his followers. Keeping his hands extended, he
said, in a firm, clear voice:

"To the Creator of all things visible and invisible let us offer up
our gratitude and praise, and so begin this day!"

And a responsive murmur of voices answered him:

    "We praise Thee, O Divine Power of Love and Life eternal!
     We praise Thee for all we are!
     We praise Thee for all we have been!
     We praise Thee for all we hope to be!--Amen."

There followed a moment's tense silence. Then the assembled brethren
sat down in their places, and Aselzion spoke in measured, distinct
accents, with the easy and assured manner of a practised orator.

"Friends and Brethren!

"We are gathered here together to consider in this moment of time
the things we have done in the past, and the things we are preparing
to do in the future. We know that from the Past, stretching back
into infinity, we have ourselves made the Present,--and according to
Divine law we also know that from this Present, stretching forward
into infinity, we shall ourselves evolve all that is yet To Come.
There is no power, no deity, no chance, no 'fortuitous concurrence
of atoms' in what is simply a figure of the Universal Mathematics.
Nothing can be 'forgiven' under the eternal law of Compensation,--
nothing need be 'prayed for,' since everything is designed to
accomplish each individual spirit's ultimate good. You are here to
learn not only the secret of life, but something of how to live that
life; and I, in my capacity, am only striving to teach what Nature
has been showing you for thousands of centuries, though you have not
cared to master her lessons. The science of to-day is but Nature's
first primer--a spelling-book as it were, with the alphabet set out
in pictures. You are told by sagacious professors,--who after all
are no more than children in their newly studied wisdom,--that human
life was evolved in the first instance from protoplasm--as they
THINK,--but they lack the ability to tell you how the protoplasm was
itself evolved--and WHY; where the material came from that went to
the making of millions of solar systems and trillions of living
organisms concerning whose existence we have no knowledge or
perception. Some of them deny a God,--but most of them are driven to
confess that there must be an Intelligence, supreme and omnipotent,
behind the visible Universe. Order cannot come out of Chaos without
a directing Mind; and Order would be quickly submerged into Chaos
again were not the directing Mind of a nature to sustain its method
and condition.

"We start, therefore, with this Governing Intelligence or directing
Mind, which must, like the brain of man, be dual, combining the male
and female attributes, since we see that it expresses itself
throughout all creation in dual form and type. Intelligence, Mind,
or Spirit, whichever we may elect to call it, is inherently active
and must find an outlet for its powers,--and the very fact of this
necessity produces Desire to perpetuate Itself in varied ways: this
again is the first attribute of Love. Hence Love is the foundation
of worlds, and the source of all living organisms,--the dual atoms,
or ions of spirit and matter yielding to Attraction, Union and
Reproduction. If we master this fact reasonably and thoroughly, we
shall be nearer the comprehension of life."

He paused a moment,--then advanced a step or two and went on, the
flaming Symbol behind him seeming literally to envelop him in its
beams,

"What we have to learn first of all is, how these laws affect us as
individual human beings and as separate personalities. It is
necessary to avoid all obscurity of language in setting forth the
simple principles which should guide and preserve each human
existence, and my explanation shall be as brief and plain as I can
make it. Granted that there is a Divine Mind or Governing
Intelligence behind the infinitude of vital and productive atoms
which in their union and reproduction build up the wonders of the
Universe, we see and admit that one of the chief results of the
working of this Divine Mind is Man. He is, so we have been told--
'the image of God.' This expression may be taken as a poetic line in
the Scriptures, meaning no more than poetic imagery,--but it is
nevertheless a truth. Man is a kind of Universe in himself--he too
is a conglomeration of atoms--atoms that are active, reproductive,
and desirous of perpetual creativeness. Behind them, as in the
nature of the Divine, there is the Governing Intelligence, the Mind,
the Spirit,--dual in type, double-sexed in action. Without the Mind
to control it, the constitution of Man is chaos,--just as the
Universe itself would be without the Creator's governance. What we
have chiefly to remember is, that just as the Spirit behind visible
Nature is Divine and eternal, so is the Spirit behind each one of
our individual selves also Divine and eternal. It HAS BEEN always,--
it WILL BE always, and we move as distinct personalities through
successive phases of life, each one under the influence of his or
her own controlling Soul, to higher and ever higher perception and
attainment. The great majority of the world's inhabitants live with
less consciousness of this Spirit than flies or worms--they build up
religions in which they prate of God and immortality as children
prattle, without the smallest effort to understand either,--and at
the Change which they call death, they pass out of this life without
having taken the trouble to discover, acknowledge or use the
greatest gift God has bestowed upon them. But we,--we who are here
to realise the existence of the all-powerful Force which gives us
complete mastery over the things of space and time and matter--we,
who know that over that individual moving universe of atoms called
Man, It can hold absolute control,--we can prove for ourselves that
the whole earth is subject to the dominance of the immortal Soul,--
ay!--and the very elements of air, fire and water!--for these are
but the ministers and servants to Its sovereign authority!"

He paused again--and after a minute or two of silence, went on--

"This beautiful earth, this over-arching sky, the exquisite things
of Nature's form and loveliness, are all given to Man, not only for
his material needs, but for his spiritual growth and evolvement.
From the light of the sun he may draw fresh warmth and colour for
his blood--from the air new supplies of life--from the very trees
and herbs and flowers he may renew his strength,--and there is
nothing created that is not intended to add in some measure to his
pleasure and well-being. For if the foundation of the Universe be
Love, as it is, then Love desires to see its creatures happy. Misery
has no place in the Divine scheme of things--it is the result of
Man's own opposition to Natural Law. In Natural Law, all things work
calmly, slowly and steadfastly together for good--Nature silently
obeys God's ordinance. Man, on the contrary, questions, argues,
denies, rebels,--with the result that he scatters his force and
fails in his highest effort. It is in his own power to renew his own
youth--his own vitality,--yet we see him sink of his own accord into
feebleness and decrepitude, giving himself up, as it were, to be
devoured by the disintegrating influences which he could easily
repel. For, as the directing Spirit of God governs the infinitude of
atoms and star-dust which go to make up universes, so the mind of a
Man should govern the atoms and star-dust of which he himself is
composed--guiding their actions and renewing them at pleasure,--
forming them into suns and systems of thought and creative power,
and wasting no particle of his eternal life forces. He can be what
he elects to be,--a god,--or merely one of a mass of units in
embryo, drifting away from one phase of existence to another in
unintelligent indifference, and so compelling himself to pass
centuries of aimless movement before entering upon any marked or
decisive path of individual and separate action. The greater number
prefer to be nothings in this way, though they cannot escape the
universal grinding mill,--they must be used for some purpose in the
end, be they never so reluctant. Therefore, we, who study the latent
powers of man, judge it wiser to meet and accept our destiny rather
than fall back in the race and allow destiny to overtake US and whip
us into place with rods of sharp experience. If there is anyone here
present who now desires to speak,--to ask a question,--or deny a
statement, let him come forward boldly and say what he has to say
without fear."

As he thus spoke, I, looking from my little hidden recess, saw a
movement among the seated brethren; one of them rose and descending
from his place, walked slowly towards Aselzion till he was within a
few paces of him--then he paused, and threw back his cowl, showing a
worn handsome face on which some great sorrow seemed to be marked
too strongly to be ever erased.

"I do not wish to live!"--he said--"I came here to study life, but
not to learn how to keep it. I would lose it gladly for the merest
trifle! For life is to me a bitter thing--a hideous and inexplicable
torment! Why should you, O Aselzion, teach us how to live long? Why
not rather teach us how to die soon?"

Aselzion's eyes were bent upon him with a grave and tender
compassion.

"What accusation do you bring against life?" he asked--"How has life
wronged you?"

"How has life wronged me?" and the unhappy man threw up his hands
with a gesture of desperation--"You, who profess to read thought and
gauge the soul, can you ask? How has life wronged me? By sheer
injustice! From my first breath--for I never asked to be born!--from
my early days when all my youthful dreams and aspirations were
checked, smothered and killed by loving parents!--loving parents,
forsooth!--whose idea of 'love' was money! Every great ambition
frustrated--every higher hope slain!--and in my own love--that love
of woman which is man's chief curse--even she was false and
worthless as a spurious coin--caring nothing whether my life was
saved or ruined--it was ruined, of course!--but what matter?--who
need care! Only the weariness of it all!--the day after day burden
of time!--the longing to lie down and hide beneath the comfortable
grass in peace,--where no false friend, no treacherous love, no
'kind' acquaintances, glad to see me suffer, can ever point their
mocking hands or round their cruel eyes at me again! Aselzion, if
the God you serve is half as wicked as the men He made, then Heaven
itself is Hell!"

He spoke deliberately, yet with passion. Aselzion silently regarded
him. The fiery Cross and Star blazed with strange colours like
millions of jewels, and the deep stillness in the chapel was for
many minutes unbroken. All at once, as though impelled by some
irresistible force, he sank on his knees.

"Aselzion! As you are strong, have patience with the weak! As you
see the Divine, pity those who are blind! As you stand firm, stretch
a hand to those whose feet are on the shifting quicksands, and if
death and oblivion are among the gifts of your bestowal, withhold
them not from me, for I would rather die than live!"

There was a pause. Then Aselzion's voice, calm, clear and very
gentle, vibrated on the silence.

"There is no death!" he said--"You cannot die! There is no
oblivion,--you may not forget! There is but one way of life--to live
it!"

Another moment's stillness--then again the steady, resolute voice
went on.

"You accuse life of injustice,--it is you who are unjust to life!
Life gave you those dreams and aspirations you speak of,--it was in
your power to realise them! I say it was in your power, had you
chosen! No parents, no friends, not God Himself, can stop you from
doing what you WILL to do! Who frustrated any great ambition of
yours but yourself? Who can slay a hope but him in whose soul it was
born? And that love of woman?--was she your true mate?--or only a
thing of eyes and hair and vanity? Did your passion touch her body
only, or did it reach her Soul? Did you seek to know whether that
Soul had ever wakened within her, or were you too well satisfied
with her surface beauty to care? In all these things blame Yourself,
not life!--for life gives you earth and heaven, time and eternity
for the attainment of joy--joy, in which, but for Yourself, there
would never be a trace of sorrow!"

The kneeling penitent--for such he now appeared to be--covered his
face with his hands.

"I cannot give you death,"--continued Aselzion-"You can take what is
called by that name for yourself if you choose--you can by your own
action, sudden or premeditated, destroy this present form and
composition of yourself for just so long as it takes the forces of
Nature to build you up again--an incredibly brief moment of time!
But you gain nothing--you neither lose your consciousness nor your
memory! Ponder this well before you pull down your present dwelling-
house!--for ingratitude breeds narrowness, and your next habitation
might be smaller and less fitted for peace and quiet breathing!"

With these words, gently spoken, he raised the penitent from his
knees, and signed to him to return to his place. He did so
obediently, without another word, pulling his cowl closely about him
so that none of his fellow-brethren might see his features. Another
man then stepped forward and addressed Aselzion.

"Master"--he said, "would it not be better to die than to grow old?
If, as you teach us, there is no real death, should there be any
real decay? What pleasure is there in life when the strength fails
and the pulses slacken--when the warm blood grows chill and
stagnant, and when even those we have loved consider we have lived
too long? I who speak now am old, though I am not conscious of age--
but others are conscious for me,--their looks, their words, imply
that I am in their way--that I am slowly dying like a lopped tree
and that the process is too tedious for their impatience. And yet--I
could be young!--my powers of work have increased rather than
lessened--I enjoy life more than those that have youth on their
side--but I know I carry the burden of seventy years upon me, and I
say that surely it is better to die than live even so long!"

Aselzion, standing in the full light of the glittering Cross and
Star, looked upon him with a smile.

"I also carry the burden--if burden you must call it--of seventy
years!" he said--"But years are nothing to me--they should be
nothing to you. Who asked you to count them or to consider them? In
the world of wild Nature, time is measured by seasons only--the bird
does not know how old it is--the rose-tree does not count its
birthdays! You, whom I know to be a brave man and patient student,
have lived the usual life of men in the world--you are wedded to a
Woman who has never cared to understand the deeper side of your
nature, and who is now far older than you, though in actual years
younger,--you have children who look upon you as their banker merely
and who, while feigning affection, really wait for your death with
eagerness in order to possess your fortune. You might as well have
never had those children!--I know all this as you yourself know it--
I also know that through the word-impressions and influence of so-
called 'friends' who wish to persuade you of your age, the
disintegrating process has begun,--but this can be arrested. You
yourself can arrest it!--the dream of Faust is no fallacy!--only
that the renewal of youth is not the work of magic evil, but of
natural good. If you would be young, leave the world as you have
known it and begin it anew,--leave wife, children, friends, all that
hang like fungi upon an oak, rotting its trunk and sapping its
strength without imparting any new form of vitality. Live again--
love again!"

"I!"--and he who was thus spoken to threw back his cowl, showing a
face wan and deeply wrinkled, yet striking in its fine
intellectuality of feature--"I!--with these white hairs! You jest
with me, Aselzion!"

"I never jest!"--replied Aselzion--"I leave jesting to the fools who
prate of life without comprehending its first beginnings. I do not
jest with you--put me to the proof! Obey my rules here but for six
months and you shall pass out of these walls with every force in
your body and spirit renewed in youth and vitality! But Yourself
must work the miracle,--which, after all, is no miracle! Yourself
must build Yourself!--as everyone is bound to do who would make the
fullest living out of life. If you hesitate,--if you draw back,--if
you turn with one foolish regret or morbid thought to your past
mistakes in life which ARE past--to her, your wife, a wife in name
but never in soul,--to your children, born of animal instinct but
not of spiritual deep love,--to those your 'friends' who count up
your years as though they were crimes,--you check the work of re-
invigoration, and you stultify the forces of renewal. You must
choose--and the choice must be voluntary and deliberate,--for no man
becomes aged and effete without his own intention and inclination to
that end,--and equally, no man retains or renews his youth without a
similar intention and inclination. Take two days to consider--and
then tell me your mind."

The man he thus addressed hesitated as though he had something more
to say--then with a deep obeisance went back to his place. Aselzion
waited till he was seated--and after the brief interval spoke again-
-

"If all of you here present are content with your rule of life in
this place, and with the studies you are undertaking, and none of
you wish to leave, I ask for the usual sign."

All the brethren rose, and raised their arms above their heads--
dropping them slowly again after a second's pause.

"Enough!" and Aselzion now moved towards the Cross and Star,
fronting it fully. As he did so, I saw to my astonishment and
something of terror that the rays proceeding from the centre of the
Symbol flamed out to an extraordinary length, surrounding his whole
figure and filling the chapel with a lurid brilliancy as though it
were suddenly on fire. Straight into the centre of the glowing
flames he steadily advanced--then, at a certain point, turned again
and faced his followers. But what an aspect now was his! The light
about him seemed to be part of his very body and garments--he was
transfigured into the semblance of something god-like and angelic--
and I was overcome with fear and awe as I looked upon him. Lifting
one hand, he made the sign of the cross,--whereat the white-robed
brethren descended from their places, and walking one by one in
line, came up to him where he stood. He spoke--and his voice rang
out like a silver clarion--

"O Divine Light!" he exclaimed--"We are a part of Thee, and into
Thee we desire to become absorbed! From Thee we know we may obtain
an immortality of life upon this gracious earth! O Nature, beloved
Mother, whose bosom burns with hidden fires of strength, we are thy
children, born of thee in spirit as in matter,--in us thou hast
distilled thy rains and dews, thy snows and frosts, thy sunlight and
thy storm!--in us thou hast embodied thy prolific beauty, thy
productiveness, thy power and thy advancement towards good--and more
than all thou hast endowed us with the divine passion of Love which
kindles the fire whereof thou art created and whereby we are
sustained! Take us, O Light! Keep us, O Nature!--and Thou, O God,
Supreme Spirit of Love, whose thought is Flame, and whose desire is
Creation, be Thou our guide, supporter and instructor through all
worlds without end! Amen!"

Once more the glorious music of the organ surged through the chapel
like a storm,--and I, trembling in every limb, knelt, covering my
veiled face closely with my hands, overcome by the splendour of the
sound and the strangeness of the scene. Gradually, very gradually,
the music died away--a deep silence followed--and when I lifted my
head, the chapel was empty! Aselzion and his disciples had vanished,
noiselessly, as though they had never been present. Only the Cross
and Star still remained glittering against its dark purple
background--darting out long tremulous rays, some of which were pale
violet, others crimson, others of the delicate hues of the pink
topaz.

I looked round,--then behind me,--and to my surprise saw that the
door of my little recess had been unlocked and left open. Acting on
an impulse too strong to resist, I stole softly out, and stepping on
tiptoe, scarcely daring to breathe, I found my way through a low
archway into the body of the chapel, and stood there all alone, my
heart beating loudly with positive terror. Yet there was nothing to
fear. No one was near me that I could see, but I felt as if there
were thousands of eyes watching me from the roof, from behind the
columns, and from the stained-glass windows that shed their light on
the marble pavement. And the glowing radiance of the Cross and Star
in all that stillness was almost terrible!--the long bright rays
were like tongues of fire mutely expressing unutterable things!
Fascinated, I drew nearer and nearer--then paused abruptly, checked
by a kind of vibration under me, as though the ground rocked--
presently, however, I gained fresh courage to go on, and by degrees
was drawn into a perfect vortex of light which rushed upon me like
great waves on all sides so forcibly that I had hardly any knowledge
of my own movements. Like a creature in a dream I moved,--my very
hands looked transparent and spirit-like as I stretched them out
towards that marvellous Symbol!--and when my eyes glanced for a
moment at the folds of my covering veil I saw that its white
silkiness shone with a pale amethystine hue. On--on I went,--a
desperate idea possessing me to go as far as I could into that
strange starry centre of living luminance--the very boldness of the
thought appalled me even while I encouraged it--but step by step I
went on resolutely till I suddenly felt myself caught as it were in
a wheel of fire! Round and round me it whirled,--darting points of
radiance as sharp as spears which seemed to enter my body and stab
it through and through--I struggled for breath and tried to draw
back,--impossible! I was tangled up in a net of endless light-
vibrations which, though they gave forth no heat, yet quivered
through my whole being with searching intensity as though bent on
probing to the very centre of my soul! I could not utter a sound,--I
stood there dumb, immovable, and shrouded in million-coloured flame,
too stunned with the shock to realise my own identity. Then all at
once something dark and cool floated over me like the shadow of a
passing cloud--I looked up and strove to utter a cry,--a word of
appeal!--and then fell to the ground, lost in complete
unconsciousness.




XV

A FIRST LESSON


I do not know how long I lay there lost to sight and sense, but when
I came to myself, I was in a quiet, shadowy place, like a kind of
little hermitage, with a window opening out upon the sea. I was
lying on a couch, with the veil I had worn still covering me, and as
I opened my eyes and looked about me I saw that it was night, and
that the moon was tracing a silver network of beams across the
waves. There was a delicious fragrance on the air--it came from a
group of roses set in a tall crystal vase close to where I lay.
Then, as I gradually regained full knowledge of my own existence, I
perceived a table in the room with a lamp burning upon it, and at
the table sat no less a personage than Aselzion himself, reading. I
was so amazed at the sight of him that for the moment I lay inert,
afraid to move--for I was almost sure I had incurred his
displeasure--till suddenly, with the feeling of a child seeking
pardon for an offence, I sprang up and ran to him, throwing myself
on my knees at his feet.

"Aselzion, forgive me!" I murmured--"I have done wrong--I had no
right to go so far--"

He turned his eyes upon me, smiling, and took me gently by the
hands.

"Who denies your right to go far if you have the strength and
courage?"--he said--"Dear child, I have nothing to forgive! You are
the maker of your own destiny! But you have been bold!--though you
are a mere woman you have dared to do what few men attempt. This is
the power of love within you--that perfect love which casteth out
fear! You risked a danger which has not harmed you--you have come
out of it unscathed,--so may it be with every ordeal through which
you may yet be tried as by fire!"

He raised me from where I knelt,--but I still held his hands.

"I could not help it!" I said--"Your command for me was 'silence and
solitude'--and in that silence and solitude I remained while I
watched you all,--and I heard everything that was said--this was
your wish and order. And when you all went away, the silence and
solitude would have been the same but for that Cross and Star! THEY
seemed to speak!--to call me--to draw me to them--and I went--hardly
knowing why, yet feeling that I MUST go!--and then--"

Aselzion pressed my hands gently.

"Then the Light claimed its own,"--he said--"and courage had its
reward! The door of your recess in the chapel was opened by my
instructions,--I wished to see what you would do. You have no
conception as yet of what you HAVE done!--but that does not matter.
You have passed one test successfully--for had you remained passive
in your place till someone came to remove you, I should have known
you for a creature of weak will and transitory impulses. But you are
stronger than I thought--so to-night I have come to give you your
first lesson."

"My first lesson!" I repeated the words after him wonderingly as he
let go my hands and put me gently into a chair which I had not
perceived but which stood in the shadow cast by the lamp almost
immediately opposite to him.

"Yes!--your first lesson!" he answered, smiling gravely--"The first
lesson in what you have come here to learn,--the perpetuation of
your life on earth for just so long as you desire it--the secret
which gives to Rafel Santoris his youth and strength and power, as
well as his governance over certain elemental forces. But first take
this"--and he poured out from a quaintly shaped flask a full glass
of deep red-coloured wine--"This is no magic potion--it is simply a
form of nourishment which will be safer for you than solid food,--
and I know you have eaten nothing all day since your light
breakfast. Drink it all--every drop!"

I obeyed--it seemed tasteless and strengthless, like pure water.

"Now"--he continued--"I will put before you a very simple
illustration of the truth which underlies all Nature. If you were
taken into a vast plain, and there saw two opposing armies, the one
actuated by a passion for destruction, the other moved only by a
desire for good, you would naturally wish the latter force to win,
would you not?"

I answered "Yes" at once, without hesitation.

"But suppose"--he went on--"that BOTH armies were actuated by good,
and that the object of the destroying force was only to break down
what was effete and mischievous, in order to build it up again in
stronger and nobler forms, while the aim of the other was to
strictly preserve and maintain the advantages it possessed, which
side would then have your sympathy?"

I tried to think, but could not instantly determine.

"Here is your point of hesitation,"--he said--"and here the usual
limit of human comprehension. Both forces are good,--but as a rule
we can only side with one. We name that one Life,--the other Death.
We think Life alone stands for what is living, and that Death is a
kind of cessation of Life instead of being one of Life's most active
forms. The Universe is entirely composed of these two fighting
forces--we call them good and evil--but there is no evil-there is
only a destruction of what MIGHT be harmful if allowed to exist. To
put it clearly, the million millions of atoms and electrons which
compose the everlasting elements of Spirit and Matter are dual--that
is to say, of two kinds--those which preserve their state of
equilibrium, and those whose work is to disintegrate, in order to
build up again. As with the Universe, so with the composition of a
human being. In you, as in myself, there exist these two forces--and
our souls are, so to speak, placed on guard between them. The one
set of atoms is prepared to maintain the equilibrium of health and
life, but if through the neglect and unwatchfulness of the sentinel
Soul any of them are allowed to become disused and effete, the other
set, whose business it is to disintegrate whatever is faulty and
useless for the purpose of renewing it in better form, begins to
work--and this disintegrating process is our conception of decay and
death. Yet, as a matter of fact, such process cannot even BEGIN
without our consent and collusion. Life can be retained in our
possession for an indefinite period on this earth,--but it can only
be done through our own actions--our own wish and will."

I looked at him questioningly.

"One may wish and will many things,"--I said--"But the result is not
always successful."

"Is that your experience?" he asked, bending his keen eyes full upon
me--"You know, if you are true to yourself, that no power can resist
the insistence of a strong Will brought steadily to bear on any
intention. If the effort fails, it is only because the Will has
hesitated. What have you made of some of your past lives--you and
your lover both--through hesitation at a supreme moment!"

I looked at him appealingly.

"If we made mistakes, could we altogether help it?" I asked--"Does
it not seem that we tried for the best?"

He smiled slightly.

"No, it does not seem so to me,"--he replied--"The mainspring of
your various previous existences,--the law of attraction drawing you
together was, and is, Love. This you fought against as though it
were a crime, and in many cases you obeyed the temporary
conventionalities of man rather than the unchanging ordinance of
God. And now--divided as you have been--lost as you have been in
endless whirlpools of infinitude, you are brought together again--
and though your lover has ceased to question, you have not ceased to
doubt!"

"I do not doubt!" I exclaimed, suddenly, and with passion--"I love
him with all my soul!--I will never lose him again!"

Aselzion looked at me questioningly.

"How do you know you have not lost him already?" he said.

At this a sudden wave of despair swept over me--a chill sense of
emptiness and desolation. Could it be possible that my own rashness
and selfishness had again separated me from my beloved?--for so I
now called him in my heart--had I by some foolish, distrustful
thought estranged him once more from my soul? The rising tears
choked me--I rose from my seat, hardly knowing what I did, and went
to the window for air--Aselzion followed me and laid his hand gently
on my shoulder.

"It is not so difficult to win love as to keep it!"--he said--
"Misunderstanding, and want of quick sympathy, end in heart-break
and separation. And this is far worse than what mortals call death."

The burning tears fell slowly from my eyes--every word seemed to
pierce my heart--I looked yearningly out on the sea, rippling under
the moon. I thought of the day, barely a week ago, when Rafel stood
beside me, his hand clasping mine,--such a little division of time
seemed to have elapsed since we were together, and yet how long! At
last I spoke--

"I would rather die, if death were possible, than lose his love"--I
said--"And where there is no love, surely there must be death?"

Aselzion sighed.

"Poor child! Now you understand why the lonely Soul hurls itself
wildly from one phase of existence to another till it finds its true
mate!"--he answered--"You say truly that where there is no love
there is no real life. It is merely a semi-conscious existence. But
you have no cause to grieve--not now,--not if you are firm and
faithful. Rafel Santoris is safe and well--and his soul is so much
with you--you are so constantly in his thoughts, that it is as if he
were himself here--see!"

And he placed his two hands for a moment over my eyes and then
removed them. I uttered a cry of ecstasy--for there before me on the
moonlit water I saw the 'Dream'!--her sails glittering with light,
and her aerial shape clearly defined against the sky! Oh, how I
longed to fly across the strip of water which alone seemed to divide
us!--and once more to stand on the deck beside him whom I now loved
more than my very hopes of heaven! But I knew it was only a vision
conjured up before me by the magic of Aselzion,--a magic used gently
for my sake, to help and comfort me in a moment of sadness and
heart's longing. And I watched, knowing that the picture must fade,-
-as it slowly did,--vanishing like a rainbow in a swirl of cloud.

"It is indeed a 'Dream'!" I said, smiling faintly, as I turned again
to Aselzion--"I pray that love itself may never be so fleeting!"

"If love is fleeting, it is not love!"--he answered--"As ephemeral
passion called by that name is the ordinary sort of attraction
existing between ordinary men and women,--men, who see no farther
than the gratification of a desire, and women, who see no higher
than the yielding to that desire. Men who love in the highest and
most faithful meaning of the term, are much rarer than women,--women
are very near the divine in love when it is first awakened in them--
if afterwards they sink to a lower level, it is generally the men
who have dragged them down. Unless a man is bent on the highest, he
is apt to settle on the lowest--whereas a woman generally soars to
the highest ideals at first in the blind instinct of a Soul seeking
its mate--how often she is hurled back from the empyrean only the
angels know! Not to all is given power to master and control the
life-forces--and it is this I would have you understand before I
leave you to-night. I can teach you the way to hold your life safely
above all disintegrating elements--but the learning of the lesson
rests with yourself."

He sat down, and I resumed my place in the chair opposite to him,
prepared to hear him with the closest attention. There were a few
things on the table which I had not previously noticed, and one of
these was a circular object covered with a cloth. He removed this
covering, and showed me a crystal globe which appeared to be full of
some strange volatile fluid, clear in itself, but intersected with
endless floating brilliant dots and lines.

"Look well at this"--he said--"for here you have a very simple
manifestation of a great truth. These dots and lines which you
observe perpetually in motion are an epitome of what is going on in
the composition of every human being. Some of them, as you see, go
in different directions, yet meet and mingle with each other at
various points of convergence--then again become separated. They are
the building-up and the disintegrating forces of the whole cosmos--
and--mark this well!--they are all, when unimprisoned, directed by a
governing will-power. You, in your present state of existence, are
simply an organised Form, composed of these atoms, and your will-
power, which is part of the Divine creative influence, is set within
you to govern them. If you govern them properly, the building-up and
revivifying atoms within you obey your command, and with increasing
strength gradually control and subdue their disintegrating
opponents,--opponents which after all are only their servants, ready
to disencumber them from all that is worthless and useless at the
first sign of disablement. There is nothing more simple than this
law, which has only to be followed in order to preserve both life
and youth. It 5s all contained in an effort of the WILL, to which
everything in Nature responds, just as a well-steered ship obeys the
compass. Remember this well!--I say, EVERYTHING IN NATURE! This
crystal globe holds momentarily imprisoned atoms which cannot just
now be directed because they are shut in, away from all Will to
govern them--but if I left them as they are for a few more hours
their force would shatter the crystal, and they would escape to
resume their appointed way. They are only shown to you as an object
lesson, to prove that such things ARE--they are facts, not dreams.
You, like this crystal globe, are full of imprisoned atoms--atoms of
Spirit and Matter which work together to make you what you are--but
you have also the governing Will which is meant to control them and
move them either to support, sustain and revivify you, or else to
weaken, break down and finally disperse and disintegrate you,
preparatory to your assumption of another form and phase of
existence. Now, do you begin to understand?"

"I think I do,"--I answered--"But is it possible always to make this
effort of the Will?"

"There is no moment in which you do not, consciously or
subconsciously, 'will' something"--he answered--"And the amount of
power you use up in 'willing' perfectly trifling and ephemeral
things, could almost lift a planet! But let us take simple actions--
such as raising a hand. You think this movement instinctive or
mechanical--but it is only because you WILL to raise it that you can
do it. If you willed NOT to raise it, it could not raise itself OF
itself. This tremendous force,--this divine gift of will-power, is
hardly exercised at all by the majority of men and women--hence
their manner of drifting here and there--their pliable yielding to
this or that opinion--the easy sway obtained over the million by a
few leaders and reformers--the infectious follies which possess
whole communities at a time--the caprices of fashion--the moods of
society--all these are due to scattered will-power, which if
concentrated would indeed 'replenish the earth and subdue it.' But
we cannot teach the world, and therefore we must be content to teach
and train a few individuals only. And when you ask if it is possible
always to make the necessary effort of will, I answer yes,--of
course it is possible. The secret of it all is to resolve upon a
firm attitude and maintain it. If you encourage thoughts of fear,
hesitation, disease, trouble, decay, incompetency, failure and
feebleness, you at once give an impetus to the disintegrating forces
within you to begin their work--and you gradually become ill,
timorous, and diseased in mind and body. If, on the contrary, your
thoughts are centred on health, vitality, youth, joy, love and
creativeness, you encourage all the revivifying elements of your
system to build up new nerve tissue and fresh brain cells, as well
as to make new blood. No scientist has ever really discovered any
logical cause why human beings should die--they are apparently
intended to live for an indefinite period. It is they themselves who
kill themselves,--even so-called 'accidents' are usually the result
of their own carelessness, recklessness or inattention to warning
circumstance. I am trying to put all this as simply as I can to
you,--there are hundreds of books which you might study, in which
the very manner of expression is so abstruse and involved that even
the most cultured intelligence can scarcely grasp it,--but what I
have told you is perfectly easy of comprehension,--the only
difficulty lies in its practical application. To-night, therefore,
and for the remainder of the time you are here, you will enter upon
certain tests and trials of your will-force--and the result of these
will prove whether you are strong enough to be successful in your
quest of life and youth and love. If you are capable of maintaining
the true attitude,--if you can find and keep the real centre-poise
of the Divine Image within you, all will be well. And remember, that
if you once learn how to govern and control the atomic forces within
yourself, you will equally govern and control all atomic forces
which come within your atmosphere. This gives you what would be
called by the ignorant 'miraculous' power, though it is no miracle.
It is nothing more than the attitude of Spirit controlling Matter.
You will find yourself not only able to govern your own forces but
also to draw upon Nature for fresh supplies--the air, the sunshine,
the trees, the flowers, will give you all they have to give on
demand--and nothing shall be refused to you. 'Ask, and ye shall
receive--seek, and ye shall find--knock, and it shall be opened unto
you.' Naturally the law is, that what you receive you must give out
again in an ungrudging outflow of love and generosity and
beneficence and sympathy, not only towards mankind but to everything
that lives--for as you are told--'Give, and it shall be given unto
you; good measure, pressed down and shaken together and running
over, shall men give into your bosom. For with the same measure that
ye mete withal, it shall be measured to you again.' These sayings of
our greatest Master are heard so often that they are considered by
many people almost trite and commonplace,--but they hold a truth
from which we cannot escape. Even such a little matter as a kind
word is paid back to the one who uttered it with a double interest
of kindness, while a cruel or coarse one carries its own punishment.
Those who take without giving are generally unsuccessful in their
lives and aims--while those who give without taking appear to be
miraculously served by both fame and fortune,--this being merely the
enactment of the spiritual law."

"I do not want fame or fortune,"--I said--"Love is enough for me!"

Aselzion smiled.

"Enough for you indeed! My child, it is enough for all! If you have
love, you have entered into the secret mind of God! Love inspires
all nobleness, all endurance, all courage,--and I think you have
some of its attributes, for you have been bold in your first
independent essay--and it is this very boldness that has brought me
here to speak to you to-night. You have, of your own accord, and
without preparation, passed what we students and mystics call 'the
first circle of fire,' and you are therefore ready for the rest of
your trial. So I will now take you back to your own room and leave
you there, for you must face your ordeal alone."

My heart sank a little, but I said nothing, and watched him as he
took up the crystal globe, full of the darting lines and points of
light gleaming like imprisoned fire, and held it for a moment
between his two hands. Then he set it down again, and covered it as
it had been covered before. The next moment he had extinguished the
lamp, and we stood together in the pale brilliancy of the moonlight
which now spread itself in a broad path of silver across the sea.
The tide was coming in, and I heard the solemn sound of rising waves
breaking rhythmically upon the shore. In silence Aselzion took me by
the hand and led me through a low doorway out of the little
hermitage into the open air, where we stood within a few feet of the
sea. The moonbeams bathed us in a shower of pearly radiance, and I
turned instinctively to look at my companion. His face appeared
transfigured into something of supernatural beauty, and for one
second the remembrance of how he had said in the chapel that he
carried the burden of seventy years upon him flashed across me with
a shock of surprise. Seventy years! He appeared to be in the very
prime and splendour of life, and the mere idea of age as connected
with him was absurd and incongruous. And while I gazed upon him,
wondering and fascinated, he lifted one hand as though in solemn
invocation to the stars that gleamed in their countless millions
overhead, and his voice, deep and musical, rang out softly yet
clearly on the silence:--

"O Supreme Guide of all the worlds created, accept this Soul which
seeks to be consecrated unto Thee! Help her to attain to all that
shall be for her wisdom and betterment, and make her one with that
Nature whereof she is born. Thou, silent and peaceful Night, invest
her with thy deep tranquillity!--thou, bright Moon, penetrate her
spirit with the shining in of holy dreams!--give her of thy strength
and depth, O Sea!--and may she draw from the treasures of the air
all health, all beauty, all life, all sweetness, so that her
existence may be a joy to the world, and her love a benediction!
Amen!"

My whole being thrilled with a sense of keen rapture as he thus
prayed for me,--I could have knelt to him in reverence but that I
instinctively knew he would not wish this act of homage. I felt that
it was best to keep silence, and I obeyed his guiding touch as,
still holding my hand, he led me into a vaulted stone passage and up
a long winding stair at the head of which he paused, and taking a
key from his girdle, unlocked a small door.

"There is your room, my child,"--he said, with a grave kindliness
which moved me strangely--"Farewell! The future is with yourself
alone."

I clung to his hand for an instant.

"Shall I not see you again?" I asked, with a little tremor in my
voice.

"Yes--you will see me again if you pass your ordeal successfully"--
he answered--"Not if you fail."

"What will happen if I fail?"

"Nothing but the most ordinary circumstance,"--he answered--"You
will leave this place in perfect safety and return to your home and
your usual avocations,--you will live as most women live, perhaps on
a slightly higher grade of thought and action--and in time you will
come to look upon your visit to the House of Aselzion as the merest
wilful escapade of folly! The world and its conventions will hold
you--"

"Never!" I exclaimed, passionately--"Aselzion, I will not fail!"

He looked earnestly in my face--then laid his hands on my head in a
mute blessing, and signed to me to pass into my turret room. I
obeyed. He closed the door upon me instantly--I heard the key turn
in the lock--and then--just the faint echo of his retreating
footsteps down the winding stair. My room was illumined by a very
faint light, the source of which I knew not. Everything was as I had
left it before I had been summoned to the mysterious Chapel of the
Cross and Star,--and I looked about me, tranquillised by the peace
and simplicity of my surroundings. I did not feel disposed to sleep,
and I resolved to write down from memory all that Aselzion had told
me while it was fresh in my mind. The white veil I had been given
still clung about me,--I now took it off and carefully folded it
ready for further use if needed. Sitting down at the little table, I
took out pen, ink and paper,--but somehow I could not fix my
attention on what I intended to do. The silence around me was more
intense than ever, and though my window was open I could not even
hear the murmur of the sea. I listened--hardly drawing breath--there
was not a sound. The extraordinary silence deepened--and with it
came a sense of cold; I seemed to be removed into a place apart,
where no human touch, no human voice could reach me,--and I felt as
I had never felt in all my life before, that I was indeed utterly
alone.




XVI

SHADOW AND SOUND


The stillness deepened. It seemed to myself that I could hear the
quickened beating of every pulse in my body. A curious vague terror
began to possess me,--I fought against its insidious influence, and
bending my head down over the paper I had set out before me, I
prepared to write. After a few minutes I managed to gain some
control over my nerves, and started to put down clearly and in
sequence the things Aselzion had told me, though I knew there was
little danger of my ever forgetting them. And then--a sudden
sensation came over me which forced me to realise that something or
someone was in the room, looking steadfastly at me.

With an effort, I raised my head, and saw nothing at first--then, by
degrees, I became aware that a Shadow, dark and impenetrable, stood
between me and the open window. At first it seemed simply a formless
mass of black vapour,--but very gradually it assumed the outline of
a Shape which did not seem human. I laid down my pen,--and, with my
heart thumping hammer-strokes of fear, looked at this strange
Darkness gathered as it were in one place and blocking out the
silver gleam of the moon. As I looked, all the light in my room was
suddenly extinguished. A cry rose involuntarily to my lips--and
physical fright began to gain the mastery over me. For with the
increasing gloom the mysterious Shadow grew more and more defined--a
blackness standing out as it were against another blackness,--the
pale glint of the moonbeams only illumining it faintly as a cloud
may be edged with a suggestion of light. It was not motionless,--it
stirred now and then as though about to lift itself to some
supernatural stature and bend above me or swoop down upon me like an
embodied storm,--and as I still gazed upon it fearingly, every nerve
strained to an almost unsupportable tension, I could have sworn that
two eyes, large and luminous, were fixed with a searching, pitiless
intensity on mine. It is impossible to describe what I felt,--a
sense of sick, swooning horror overcame me,--my head swam giddily,
and I could not now utter a sound.

Trembling violently, I rose to my feet in a kind of mechanical
impulse, determined to turn away from the dreadful contemplation of
this formless Phantom, when suddenly, as if by a lightning flash of
conviction, the thought came to me that it was not by coward
avoidance that I could expect to overcome either my own fears or the
nameless danger which apparently threatened me. I closed my eyes and
retreated, as it were, within myself to find that centre-poise of
my own spirit which I knew must remain an invincible force despite
all attack, being in itself immortal,--and I mentally barricaded my
soul with thoughts of armed resistance. Then, opening my eyes again,
I saw that the Shadow loomed blacker and vaster--while the luminance
around it was more defined, and was not the radiance of the moon,
but some other light that was ghostly and terrifying. But I had now
regained a little courage,--and slight as it was I held to it as my
last hope, and gradually steadied myself upon it like a drowning
creature clinging to a plank for rescue. Presently I found myself
able to ask questions of my inner consciousness. What, after all,
could this Phantom--if Phantom it were--do to work me harm? Could it
kill me with sheer terror? Surely in that case the terror would be
my own fault, for why should I be afraid? The thing called Death
being no more than a Living Change did it matter so much when or how
the change was effected?

"Who is responsible,"--I said to myself--"for the sense of fear? Who
is it that so mistrusts the Divine order of the Universe as to doubt
the ultimate intention of goodness in things which appear evil? Is
it not I alone who am the instigator of my own dread?--and can this
dark, dumb Spectre do more to me than is ordained for my blessing in
the end?"

With these thoughts I grew bold--my nervous trembling ceased. I now
chose deliberately to consider, and WILLED to determine, that this
mysterious Shadow, darker still as it grew, was something of a
friend in disguise. I lifted my head half defiantly, half hopefully
in the gloom, and the strange fact that the only light I saw came
from the weirdly gleaming edge of radiance round the Phantom itself
did not frighten me from the attitude I had resolved upon. The more
I settled myself into that attitude the firmer it became--and the
stronger grew my courage. I gently moved aside the table on which I
had been writing, and stood up. Once on my feet I felt still bolder
and surer of myself, and though the Shadow opposite to me looked
darker and more threatening than before, I began to move steadily
towards it. I made an effort to speak to it, and at last found my
voice.

"Whatever you are," I said aloud, "you cannot exist at all without
God's will! God ordains nothing that is not for good, therefore you
cannot be here with any evil purpose! If I am afraid of you, my fear
is my own weakness. I will not look at you as a thing that can or
would do me harm, and therefore I am coming to you to find out your
meaning! You shall prove to me what you are made of, to the very
depth and heart of your darkness!--you shall unveil to me all that
you hide behind your terrifying aspect,--because I KNOW that
whatever your intention towards me may be, you cannot hurt my Soul!"

As I spoke I drew nearer and nearer--and the luminous edge round the
Phantom grew lighter and lighter, till--suddenly a flash of
brilliant colour like a rainbow glittered full on my eyes so sharply
that I fell back, half blinded by its splendour. Then--as I looked--
I dropped to my knees in speechless awe--for the Shadow had changed
to a dazzling Shape of winged radiance,--a figure and face so
glorious that I could only gaze and gaze, with all my soul entranced
in wonder! I heard delicious music around me, but I could not
listen--all my soul was in my eyes. The Vision grew in stature and
in splendour, and I stretched out my hands to it in prayerful
appeal, conscious that I was in the shining Presence of some
inhabitant of higher and more heavenly spheres than ours. The
beautiful head, crowned with a diadem of flowers like white stars,
bent towards me--the luminous eyes smiled into mine, and a voice
sweeter than all sweet singing spoke to me in accents of thrilling
tenderness.

"Thou hast done well!" it said--"Even so always approach Darkness
without fear! Then shalt thou find the Light! Meet Sorrow with a
trusting heart--so shalt thou discover an angel in disguise! God
thinks no evil of thee--desires no wrong towards thee--has no
punishment in store for thee--give Thyself into His Hand, and be at
peace!"

Slowly,--like the colours of the sunset melting away into the grey
of twilight, the Vision faded,--and when I recovered from the
dazzled bewilderment into which I had been thrown, I found myself
again in complete solitude and darkness--darkness unrelieved save by
the dim light of the setting moon. I was for a long time unable to
think of anything but the strange experience through which I had
just passed--and I wondered what would have happened if instead of
boldly advancing and confronting the dark Phantom which had so
terrified me I had striven to escape from it? I believed, and I
think I was right in my belief, that I should have found every door
open, and every facility offered for a cowardly retreat had I chosen
to make it. And then--everything would have been at an end!--I
should have probably had to leave the House of Aselzion--and perhaps
I too should have been marked with a black cross as a failure!
Inwardly I rejoiced that so far I had not given way, and presently
yielding to a drowsiness that began to steal over me, I undressed
and went to bed, perfectly tranquil in mind and happy.

I must have slept several hours when I was awakened suddenly by the
sound of voices conversing quite close to me--in fact, they seemed
to be on the other side of the wall against which my bed was placed.
They were men's voices, and one or two were curiously harsh and
irritable in tone. There was plenty of light in my room--for the
night had passed, and as far as I could tell it seemed to be early
morning. The voices went on, and I found myself compelled to listen.

"Aselzion is the cleverest humbug of his time,"--said one--"He is
never so happy as when he can play the little god and dupe his
worshippers!"

A laugh followed this sentence.

"He's a marvel in his way,"--said another--"He must be a kind of
descendant of some ancient Egyptian conjurer who had the trick of
playing with fire. There is nothing in the line of so-called miracle
he cannot do,--and of course those who are ignorant of his methods,
and who are credulous themselves--"

"Like the woman here,"--interposed the first voice.

"Yes--like the woman here--little fool!"--and there was more
laughter--"Fancying herself in love with Rafel Santoris!"

I sat up in bed, straining my ears now for every word. My cheeks
were burning--my heart beating--I hardly knew what to think. There
was a silence for two or three minutes--minutes that seemed like
ages in my longing to hear more.

"Santoris always managed to amuse himself!"--said a thin, sharp
voice with a mocking ring in its tone--"There was always some woman
or other in love with him. Some woman he could take in easily, of
course!"

"Not difficult to find!"--rejoined the first voice that had spoken,
"Most women are blind where their affections are concerned."

"Or their vanity!"

Another silence. I rose from my bed, shivering with a sense of
sudden cold, and threw on my dressing-gown. Going to the window, I
looked out on the fair expanse of the calm sea, silver-grey in the
early dawn. How still and peaceful it looked!--what a contrast to
the storm of doubt and terror that was beginning to rage within my
own heart! Hush! The voices began again.

"Well, it's all over now, and his theory of perpetuating life at
pleasure has come to an untimely end. Where did the yacht go down?"

"Off Armadale, in Skye."

For a moment I could not realise what had been said and tried to
repeat both question and answer--'Where did the yacht go down?' 'Off
Armadale, in Skye.'

What did it mean?--The yacht? Gone down? What yacht? They were
talking of Santoris--of Rafel, my beloved!--MY lover, lost through
ages of time and space, and found again only to be once more
separated from me through my own fault--my own fault!--that was the
horror of it--a horror I could not contemplate without an almost
maddening anguish. I ran to the wall through which I had heard the
voices talking and pressed my ear against it, murmuring to myself--
"Oh no!--it is not possible!--not possible! God would not be so
cruel!" For many minutes I heard nothing--and I was rapidly losing
patience and self-control, when at last I heard the conversation
resumed,--"He should never have risked his life in such a vessel"--
said one of the voices in a somewhat gentler tone--"It was a
wonderfully clever contrivance, but the danger of all that
electricity was obvious. In a storm it would have no chance."

"That has been thoroughly proved,"--answered another voice--"Just
half a gale of wind with a dash of thunder and lightning, and down
it went, with every soul on board."

"Santoris might have saved himself. He was a fine swimmer."

"Was he?"

Another silence. I thought my head would have burst with its aching
agony of suspense,--my eyes were burning like hot coals with a
weight of unshed tears. I felt that I could have battered down the
wall between me and those torturing voices in my feverish desire to
know the worst--the worst at all costs! If Rafel were dead--but no!-
-he could not die! He could not actually perish--but he could be
parted from me as he had been parted before--and I--I should be
alone again--alone as I had been all my life! And in my foolish
pride I had voluntarily severed myself from him!--was this my
punishment? More talking began, and I listened, like a criminal
listening to a cruel sentence.

"Aselzion will tell her, of course. Rather a difficult business!--as
he will have to admit that his teachings are not infallible. And on
the whole there was something very taking about Santoris--I'm sorry
he's gone. But he would only have fooled the woman had he lived."

"Oh! That, naturally! But that hardly matters. She would only have
had herself to blame for falling into the trap."

I drew myself away from the wall, trembling and sick with dread.
Mechanically I dressed myself, and stared out at the gold of the sun
which was now pouring its radiance full on the sea. The beauty of
the scene moved me not at all--nothing mattered. All that my
consciousness could take in was that, according to what I had heard,
Rafel was dead,--drowned in the sea over which his fairy vessel the
'Dream' had sailed so lightly--and that all he had said of our
knowledge of each other in former lives, and of the love which had
drawn us together, was mere 'fooling'! I leaned out of the window,
and my eyes rested on the little crimson rose that still blossomed
against the wall in fragrant confidence. And then I spoke aloud,
hardly conscious of my own words--

"It is wicked"--I said--"wicked of God to allow us to imagine
beautiful things that have no existence! It is cruel to ordain us to
love, if love must end in disappointment and treachery! It would be
better to teach us at once that life is intended to be hard and
plain and without tenderness or truth, than to lead our souls into a
fool's paradise!"

Then--all at once--I remembered the dark Phantom of the night and
its transformation into the Vision of an Angel. I had struggled
against the terror of its first spectral appearance, and had
conquered my fears,--why was I now shaken from my self-control? What
was the cause? Voices, merely! Voices behind a wall that spoke of
death and falsehood,--voices belonging to persons I did not know and
could not see--like the voices of the world which delight in
uttering scandals and cruelties and which never praise so much as
they condemn. Voices merely! Ah!--but they spoke of the death of him
whom I loved!--must I not listen? They spoke of his treachery and
'fooling.' Should I not hear?

And yet--who were those persons, if persons they were, who talked of
him with such easy callousness? I had met no one in the House of
Aselzion save Aselzion himself and his servant or secretary
Honorius,--who then could there be except those two to know the
reasons that had brought me hither? I began to question myself and
to doubt the accuracy of the terrible news I had inadvertently
overheard. If any evil had chanced to Rafel Santoris, would Aselzion
have told me he was 'safe and well' when he had conjured up for my
comfort the picture of the 'Dream' yacht on the moonlit sea only a
few hours ago? Yet with my bravest effort I could not recover myself
sufficiently to be quite at peace,--and in my restless condition of
mind I looked towards the turret door opening to the stairway which
led to the little garden below and the seashore--but it was fast
shut, and I remembered Aselzion had locked it. But, to my complete
surprise, another door stood open,--a door that had seemed part of
the wall--and a small room was disclosed beyond it,--a kind of
little shrine, hung with pale purple silk, and looking as though it
were intended to hold something infinitely precious. I entered it
hesitatingly, not sure whether I was doing right or wrong, and yet
impelled by something more than curiosity. As I stepped across the
threshold I heard the voices behind the wall again--they sounded
louder and more threatening, and I paused,--half afraid, yet longing
to know all that might yet be said, though such knowledge might mean
nothing but misery and despair to me.

"All women are fools!"--and this trite observation was made by
someone speaking in harsh and bitter accents--"It is not love that
really moves them so much as the self-satisfaction of BEING LOVED.
No woman could be faithful for long to a dead man--she would lack
the expected response to her superabundant sentimentality, and she
would tire of waiting to meet him in Paradise--if she believed in
such a possibility, which in nine cases out of ten she would not."

"With Aselzion there are no dead men"--said another of the unseen
speakers--"They have merely passed into another living state. And
according to his theories, lovers cannot be separated, even by what
is called death, for long."

"Poor comfort!" and with the words I heard a laugh of scornful
mockery--"The women who have loved Rafel Santoris would hardly thank
you for it!"

I shuddered a little, as with cold. 'The women who have loved Rafel
Santoris!' This phrase seemed to darken the very recollection of the
handsome face and form of the man I had, almost unconsciously to
myself, begun to idealise--something coarse and common suggested
itself in association with him, and my heart sank within me,
deprived of hope. Voices, merely!--yet how they tortured me! If I
could only know the truth, I thought!--if Aselzion would only come
and tell me the worst at once! In a kind of stupor of unnameable
grief I stood in the little purple-hung shrine so suddenly opened to
me, and began to dreamily consider the unkindness and harshness of
those voices!--Ah! so like the voices of the world! Voices that
sneer and mock and condemn!--voices that would rather utter a
falsehood than any word that should help and comfort--voices that
take a cruel pleasure in saying just the one thing that will wound
and crush an aspiring spirit!--voices that cannot tune themselves to
speak of love without grudging bitterness and scorn--voices--ah
God!--if only all the harsh and calumniating voices of humanity were
stilled, what a heaven this earth would be!

And yet--why should we listen to them? What have they really to do
with us? Is the Soul to be moved from its centre by casual opinion?
What is it to me that this person or that person approves or
disapproves my actions? Why should I be disturbed by rumours, or
frightened by ill report?

Absorbed in these thoughts, I hardly realised the almost religious
peace of my surroundings,--and it was only when the voices ceased
for a few minutes that I saw what was contained in this small room I
had half unwittingly entered,--an exquisite little table, apparently
made of crystal which shone like a diamond--and on the table, an
open book. A chair was placed in position for the evident purpose of
reading--and as I approached, at first indifferently and then with
awakening interest, I saw that the open book showed an inscription
on its fly-leaf--"To a faithful student.--From Aselzion." Was _I_ 'a
faithful student'? I asked myself the question doubtingly. There was
no 'faithfulness' in fears and depressions! Here was I, shaken in
part from self-control from the mere hearing of voices behind a
wall! I, who had said that "God ordains nothing that is not for
good"--was suddenly ready to believe that He had ordained the death
of the lover to whom His laws had guided me! I, to whom had been
vouchsafed the beatific vision of an Angel--an Angel who had said--
"God thinks no evil of thee--desires no wrong towards thee--has no
punishment in store for thee--give thyself into His Hand, and be at
peace!" was already flinching and turning away from the Faith that
should keep me strong! A sense of shame stole over me--and almost
timidly I approached the table on which the open book lay, and sat
down in the chair so invitingly placed. I had scarcely done this
when the voices began again, in rather louder and angrier tones.

"She imagines she can learn the secret of life! A woman, too! The
brazen arrogance of such an attempt!"

"No, no! It is not the secret of life she wants to discover so much
as the secret of perpetual youth! That, to a woman, is everything!
To be always young and always fair! What feminine thing would not
'adventure for such merchandise'!"

A loud laugh followed this observation.

"Santoris was well on his way to the goal"--said a voice that was
suave and calm of accent--"Certainly no one would have guessed his
real age."

"He had all the ardour and passion of youth"--said another voice--
"The fire of love ran as warmly in his veins as though he were a
Romeo! None of the coldness and reluctance of age affected him where
the fair sex was concerned!"

More laughter followed. I sat rigidly in the chair by the crystal
table, listening to every word.

The woman here is the latest victim of his hypnotic suggestions,
isn't she?"

"Yes. One may say his LAST victim--he will victimise no more."

"I suppose if Aselzion told her the truth she would go at once?"

"Of course! Why should she remain? It is only a dream of love that
has brought her here--when she knows the dream is over, there will
be nothing left."

True! Nothing left! The whole world a desert, and Heaven itself
without hope! I pressed my hands to my eyes to try and cool their
burning ache--was it possible that what these voices said could be
true? They had ceased speaking, and there was a blessed silence. As
a kind of desperate resource, I took out the letter Rafel Santoris
had written to me, and read its every word with an eager passion of
yearning--especially the one passage that ran thus--"We--you and I--
who know that Life, being ALL Life, CANNOT die,--ought to be wiser
in our present space of time than to doubt each other's infinite
capability for love and the perfect world of beauty which love
creates."

'Wiser than to doubt'! Ah, I was not wise enough! I was full of
doubts and imagined evils--and why? Because of voices behind a wall!
Surely a foolish cause for sorrow! I tried to extricate my mind from
the darkness of despondency into which it had fallen, and to
distract my attention from my own unhappy thoughts I glanced at the
book which lay open before me. As I looked, its title, printed in
letters of gold, flashed on my eyes like a gleam of the sun--'The
Secret of Life.' A sudden keen expectancy stirred in me--I folded
Rafel's letter and slipped it back into its resting-place near my
heart--then I drew my chair close up to the table, and bending over
the book began to read. All was now perfectly still around me--the
voices had ceased. Gradually I became aware that what I was reading
was intended for my instruction, and that the book itself was a gift
to me from Aselzion if I proved a 'faithful student.' A thrill of
hope and gratitude began to relieve the cold weight upon my heart,--
and I suddenly resolved that I would not listen to any more voices,
even if they spoke again.

"Rafel Santoris is not dead!"--I said aloud and resolutely--"He
could not so sever himself from me now! He is not treacherous--he is
true! He is not 'fooling' me--he is relying upon me to believe in
him. And I WILL believe in him!--my love and faith shall not be
shaken by mere rumour! I will give him no cause to think me weak or
cowardly,--I will trust him to the end!"

And with these words spoken to the air, I went on reading quietly in
a stillness made suddenly fragrant with the scent of unseen flowers.




XVII

THE MAGIC BOOK


It is not possible here to transcribe more than a few extracts from
the book on which my attention now became completely riveted. The
passages selected are chosen simply because they may by chance be
useful to those few--those very few--who desire to make of their
lives something more than a mere buy and sell business, and also
because they can hardly be called difficult to understand. When
Paracelsus wrote 'The Secret of Long Life' he did so in a fashion
sufficiently abstruse and complex to scare away all but the most
diligent and persevering of students, this no doubt being his
intention. But the instructions given in the volume placed, as I
imagined, for my perusal, were simple and in accordance with many of
the facts discovered by modern science, and as I read on and on I
began to see light through the darkness, and to gain a perception of
the way in which I might become an adept in what the world deems
'miracle,' but which after all is nothing but the scientific
application of common sense. To begin with, I will quote the
following,--headed

LIFE AND ITS ADJUSTMENT

"Life is the Divine impetus of Love. The Force behind the Universe
is Love--and from that Love is bred Desire and Creation. Even as the
human lover passionately craves possession of his beloved, so that
from their mutual tenderness the children of Love are born, the
Divine Spirit, immortally creative and desirous of perfect beauty,
possesses space with eternal energy, producing millions of solar
systems, each one of which has a different organisation and a
separate individuality. Man, the creature of our small planet, the
Earth, is but a single result of the resistless output of Divine
fecundity,--nevertheless Man is the 'image of God' in that he is
endowed with reason, will and intelligence beyond that of the purely
animal creation, and that he is given an immortal Soul, formed for
love and for the eternal things which love creates. He can himself
be Divine, in the Desire and Perpetuation of Life. Considered in a
strictly material sense, he is simply an embodied force composed of
atoms held together in a certain organised form,--but within this
organised form is contained a spiritual Being capable of guiding and
controlling its earthly vehicle and adjusting it to surroundings and
circumstances. In his dual nature Man has the power of holding his
life-cells under his own command--he can renew them or destroy them
at pleasure. He generally elects to destroy them through selfishness
and obstinacy,--the two chief disintegrating elements of his mortal
composition. Hence the result which he calls 'death'--but which is
merely the necessary transposition of his existence (which he has
himself brought about) into a more useful phase. If he were to learn
once for all that he can prolong his life on this earth in youth and
health for an indefinite period, in which days and years are not
counted, but only psychic 'episodes' or seasons, he could pass from
one joy to another, from one triumph to another, as easily as
breathing the air. It is judged good for a man's body that he should
stand upright, and that he should move his limbs with grace and
ease, performing physical exercises for the improvement and
strengthening of his muscles,--and he is not considered a fool for
any feats of physical valour or ability which he may accomplish. Why
then should he not train his Soul to stand as upright as his body,
so that it may take full possession of all the powers which natural
and spiritual energy can provide?

"Reader and Student!--you for whom these words are written, learn
and remember that the secret strength and renewal of life is
Adjustment--the adjustment of the atoms whereof the body is composed
to the commands of the Soul. Be the god of your own universe!
Control your own solar system that it may warm and revivify you with
an ever recurring spring! Make Love the summer of your life, and let
it create within you the passion of noble desire, the fervour of
joy, the fire of idealism and faith! Know yourself as part of the
Divine Spirit of all things, and be divine in your own creative
existence. The whole Universe is open to the searchings of your Soul
if Love be the torch to light your way!"

Having read thus far, I paused--the little room in which I sat
appeared darker--or was it my fancy? I listened for the voices which
had so confused and worried me--but there was no sound. I turned the
pages of the book before me, and found the following:

THE ACTION OF THOUGHT

"Thought is an actual motive Force, more powerful than any other
motive force in the world. It is not the mere pulsation in a
particular set of brain cells, destined to pass away into
nothingness when the pulsation has ceased. Thought is the voice of
the Soul. Just as the human voice is transmitted through distance on
the telephone wires, so is the Soul's voice carried through the
radiant fibres connected with the nerves to the brain. The brain
receives it, but cannot keep it--for it again is transmitted by its
own electric power to other brains,--and you can no more keep a
thought to yourself than you can hold a monopoly in the sunshine.
Everywhere in all worlds, throughout the whole cosmos, Souls are
speaking through the material medium of the brain,--souls that may
not inhabit this world at all, but that may be as far away from us
as the last star visible to the strongest telescope. The harmonies
that suggest themselves to the musician here to-day may have fallen
from Sirius or Jupiter, striking on his earthly brain with a
spiritual sweetness from worlds unknown,--the poet writes what he
scarcely realises, obeying the inspiration of his dreams,-and we are
all, at our best, but mediums for conveying thought, first receiving
it from other spheres to ourselves, and then transmitting it from
ourselves to others. Shakespeare, the chief poet and prophet of the
world, has written: 'There is nothing good or bad but thinking makes
it so,'--thus giving out a profound truth,--one of the most profound
truths of the Psychic Creed. For what we THINK, we are; and our
thoughts resolve themselves into our actions.

"In the renewal of life and the preservation of youth, Thought is
the chief factor. If we THINK we are old--we age rapidly. If, on the
contrary, we THINK we are young, we preserve our vitality
indefinitely. The action of thought influences the living particles
of which our bodies are composed, so that we positively age them or
rejuvenate them by the attitude we assume. The thinking attitude of
the human Soul should be one of gratitude, love and joy. There is no
room in Spiritual Nature for fear, depression, sickness or death.
God intends His creation to be happy, and by bringing the Soul and
Body both into tune with happiness we obey His laws and fulfil His
desire. Therefore, to live long, encourage thoughts of happiness!
Avoid all persons who talk of disease, misery and decay--for these
things are the crimes of man, and are offences against God's primal
design of beauty. Drink in deep draughts of sunshine and fresh air,-
-inhale the perfume of flowers and trees,--keep far away from cities
and from crowds--seek no wealth that is not earned by hand or brain-
-and above all things remember that the Children of Light may walk
in the Light without fear of darkness!"

Something in this latter sentence made me stop, and look again
around me--and again I felt sure that the room was growing darker,
and not only darker but smaller. The purple silk hangings which
draped the walls were almost within my touch, and I knew they had
not been so close to me when I first sat down to read. A nervous
tremor ran through me, but I resolved I would not be the dupe of my
own fancy, and I set myself once more resolutely to the study of the
volume before me. The next paragraph which attracted me was headed

ON THE COMMAND OF LIFE'S FORCES

and began thus:

"To live long you must have perfect control of the forces that
engender life. The atoms of which your body is composed are in
perpetual movement,--your Spiritual Self must guide them in the way
they should go, otherwise they resemble an army without organisation
or equipment, easily put to rout by a first assault. If you have
them under your spiritual orders you are practically immune from all
disease. Disease can never enter your system save through some
unguarded corner. You may meet with accident--through the fault of
others or through your own wilfulness,--if through your own
wilfulness, you have only yourself to blame--if through the fault of
others, you may know that it was a destined and pre-ordained removal
of yourself from a sphere for which you are judged to be unfitted.
Barring such accident, your life need know no end, even on this
earth. Your Spirit, called the Soul, is a Creature of Light--and it
can supply revivifying rays to every atom and cell in your body
without stint or cessation. It is an exhaustless supply of 'radium'
from which the forces of your life may draw perpetual sustenance.
Man uses every exterior means of self-preservation, but forgets the
interior power he possesses, which was bestowed upon him that he
might 'replenish the earth and subdue it.' To 'replenish' the earth
is to give out love ungrudgingly to all Nature,--to 'subdue' the
earth, is first, to master the atoms of which the human organisation
is composed, and hold them completely under control, so that by
means of this mastery, all other atomic movements and forces upon
this planet and its encircling atmosphere may be equally controlled.
Much is talked of the 'light rays' which pierce solid matter as
though it were nothing but clear air--yet this discovery is but the
beginning of wonders. There are rays which divine metals, even as
the hazel wand divines the presence of water,--and the treasures of
the earth, the gold, the silver, the jewels and precious things that
are hidden beneath its surface and in the depth of the sea can be
seen in their darkest recesses by the penetrating flash of a Ray as
yet unknown to any but adepts in the Psychic Creed. No true adept is
ever poor,--poverty cannot exist where perfect control of the life
forces is maintained. Gladness, peace and plenty must naturally
attend the Soul that is in tune with Nature and life is always
perpetuated from the joy of life.

"Stand, therefore, O patient Student, erect and firm!--let the
radiating force of the Soul possess every nerve and blood-vessel of
the body, and learn to command all things pertaining to good with
that strength which compels obedience! Not idly did the Supreme
Master speak when He told His disciples that if their faith were but
as a grain of mustard seed they could command a mountain to be cast
into the sea, and it would obey. Remember that the Spirit within
your bodily house of clay is Divine, and of God!--and that with God
all things are possible!"

I raised my head from its bent position over the book, and drew a
long breath--something oppressed me with a sense of suffocation, and
looking up I saw that I was being steadily closed in, as by a
contracting cage. The little room, draped with its soft purple
hangings, was now too small for me to move about, I was pinned to my
chair, and the ceiling was apparently descending upon me. With a
shock of horrified memory I recalled the old torture of the 'living
tomb' practised by the Spanish Inquisition, when the wretched victim
was compelled to watch the walls of his prison slowly narrowing
round him inch by inch till he was crushed to death. How could I be
sure that no such cruelties were used among the mysterious members
of a mysterious Brotherhood, whose avowed object of study was the
searching out of the secret of life? I made an effort to rise, and
found I could stand upright--and there straight opposite to me was
the entrance to my own room from which I had wandered into this
small inner chamber. It seemed easy enough to get there, and yet--I
found myself hindered by an invisible barrier. I stood, with my
heart beating nervously--wondering what was my threatening danger.
Almost involuntarily my eyes still perused the printed page of the
book before me, and I read the following sentences in a kind of
waking dream:--

"To the Soul that will not study the needs of its immortal nature,
life itself becomes a narrow cell. All God's creation waits upon it
to supply what it shall demand,--yet it starves in the midst of
plenty. Fear, suspicion, distrust, anger, envy and callousness
paralyse its being and destroy its action,--love, courage, patience,
sweetness, generosity and sympathy are actual life-forces to it and
to the body it inhabits. All the influences of the social world work
AGAINST it--all the influences of the natural world work WITH it.
There is nothing of pure Nature that will not obey its behest, and
this should be enough for its happy existence. Sorrow and despair
result from the misguidance of the Will--there is no other cause in
earth or heaven for any pain or trouble."

Misguidance of the Will! I spoke the words aloud--then went on
reading--

"What is Heaven? A state of perfect happiness. What is Happiness?
The immortal union of two Souls in one, creatures of God's eternal
light, partaking each other's thoughts, bestowing upon each other
the renewal of joy, and creating loveliness in form and action by
their mutual sympathy and tenderness. Age cannot touch them--death
has no meaning for them,--life is their air and space and movement--
life palpitates through them and warms them with colour and glory as
the sunshine warms and reddens the petals of the rose--they grow
beyond mortality and are immune from all disaster--they are a world
in themselves, involuntarily creating other worlds as they pass from
one phase to another of production and fruition. For there is no
good work accomplished without love,--no great triumph achieved
without love,--no fame, no victory gained without love! The lovers
of God are the beloved of God!--their passion is divine, knowing no
weariness, no satiety, no end! For God is the Supreme Lover and
there is nothing higher than Love!"

Here, on a sudden impulse, I took up the book, closed it and held it
clasped in my two hands. As I did this, a great darkness overwhelmed
me--a sound like thunder crashed on my ears, and I felt the whole
room reeling into chaos. The floor sank, and I sank with it, down to
a great depth so swiftly that I had no time to think what had
happened till the sensation of falling stopped abruptly, and I found
myself in a narrow green lane, completely shadowed by the wide
boughs of over-arching trees. Hardly could I realise my surroundings
when I saw Rafel!--Rafel Santoris himself walking towards me--but--
not alone! The eager impulse to run to him was checked--I stood
quiet, and cold to the heart. A woman was with him--a woman young
and very beautiful--his arm was round her, and his eyes looked with
unwearied tenderness at her face. I heard his voice--caressing, and
infinitely gentle.

"Beloved!" he said--"I call you by this name as I have always called
you through many cycles of time! Is it not strange that even the
eager spirit, craving for its preordained mate, is subject to error?
I thought I had found her whom I should love a little while before I
met you--but this was a momentary blindness!--YOU are the one I have
sought for many centuries!--YOU are the one and only beloved!--
promise never to leave me again!" She answered--and I heard her
murmur, soft as a sigh--"I promise!" Still walking together like
lovers, they came on--I knew they must pass me,--and I stood in
their way that Rafel Santoris at least might see me--might know that
I had adventured into the House of Aselzion for his sake, and that
so far I had not failed! If he were false, then surely the failure
would be his! With a sickening heart I watched him approach,--his
blue eyes rested on me carelessly with a cold smile--his fair
companion glanced at me as at a stranger--and they moved on and
passed out of sight. I could not have spoken, had I tried--I was
stricken dumb and feeble. This was the end, then? I had made my
journey to no purpose,--he had already found another 'subject' for
his influence!

Stunned and bewildered with the confusion of thought in my brain, I
tried to walk a few paces, and found the ground soft as velvet,
while a cool breeze blowing through the trees refreshed my aching
forehead and eyes. I still held the book--'The Secret of Life'--and
in a dull, aimless way thought how useless it was! What does Life
matter if Love be untrue? The sun was shining somewhere above me,
for I saw glinting reflections of it through the close boughs, and
there were birds singing. But both beauty of sight and beauty of
sound were lost to me--I had no real consciousness left save that
the lover who professed to love me with an eternal love loved me no
more! So the world was desolate, and heaven itself a blank!--death,
and death alone seemed dear and desirable! I walked slowly and with
difficulty--my limbs were languid, and I had lost all courage. If I
could have found my way to Aselzion I would have told him--"This is
enough! No more do I need the secret of youth or life, since love
has left me."

Presently I began to think more coherently. A little while back I
had heard voices behind a wall saying that Rafel Santoris was dead,-
-drowned in his own yacht 'off Armadale, in Skye.' If that was true
how came he here? I questioned myself in vain,--till presently I
gathered up sufficient force to remember that love--REAL love--knows
no change. Did I believe in my lover's love, or did I doubt it? That
was a point for my own consideration! But, had I not the testimony
of my own eyes? Was I not myselt the witness of his altered mind?

Here, seeing a rustic seat under one of the shadiest trees, I sat
down, and my mind gradually steadied itself. Why, I inwardly asked,
had I been so suddenly and forcibly brought into this place for no
apparent reason save to look upon Rafel Santoris in the company of
another woman whom it seemed that he now preferred to me? Ought that
to make any difference in my love for him? "In love, if love be
love, if love be ours, Faith and unfaith can ne'er be equal powers,
Unfaith in aught is want of faith in all." If the happiness of the
one I loved was obtained through other means than mine, ought I to
grudge it? And yet!--my heart was full of a sick heaviness,--it
seemed to me that I had lately been the possessor of an inestimable
joy which had been ruthlessly snatched from me. Still meditating in
solitary sadness, I sat in the soft gloom wondering at the strange
chance that had brought me into such a place, and, curiously enough,
never thinking that the whole adventure might be the result of a
pre-ordained design.

Presently, hearing slow footsteps approaching, I looked up and saw
an aged man walking towards me, accompanied by a woman of gentle and
matronly appearance who supported him on her arm. The looks of both
these personages were kindly, and inspired confidence at a glance,--
and I watched them coming with a kind of hope that perhaps they
might explain my present dilemma. I was particularly attracted by
the venerable and benevolent aspect of the man--and as he drew near,
seeing that he evidently intended to speak to me, I rose from my
seat, and made a step or two forward to meet him. He inclined his
head courteously, and smiled upon me with a grave and compassionate
air.

"I am very glad,"--he said, in a friendly tone--"that we have not
come too late. We feared--did we not?" here he looked to his
companion for confirmation of his words--"that you might have been
hopelessly ensnared and victimised before we could come to the
rescue."

"Alas, yes!" said the woman, in accents of deep pity; "And that
would have been terrible indeed!"

I stared at them both, utterly bewildered. They spoke of rescue,--
rescue from what? 'Hopelessly ensnared and victimised.' What did
they mean? Since I had seen Rafel Santoris with another woman he
called 'beloved'--I had felt almost incapable of speech--but now I
found my voice suddenly.

"I do not understand you"--I said, as clearly and firmly as I could-
-"I am here by my own desire, and I am not being ensnared or
victimised. Why should I need rescue?"

The old man shook his head compassionately.

"Poor child!" he said--"Are you not a prisoner in the House of
Aselzion?"

"With my own consent,"--I answered.

He lifted his hands in a kind of appealing astonishment, and the
woman smiled sadly.

"Not so!"--she told me--"You are under a very serious delusion. You
are here by the wicked will of Rafel Santoris--a man who would
sacrifice any life remorselessly in the support of his own mad
theories! You are under his influence, you poor creature!--so easily
trapped, too!--you think you are following your own way and carrying
out your own wishes, but you are really the slave of Santoris and
have been so ever since you met him. You are a mere instrument on
which he can play any tune." And she turned to the old man beside
her with an appealing gesture--"Is it not so?"

He bent his head in the affirmative.

For a moment my brain was in a whirl. Could it be possible that what
they said was true? Their looks were sincere,--they could have no
object but kindness in warning me of intended mischief. I tried to
conceal the torturing anxiety that possessed me, and asked quietly--

"If you have good reason to think all this, what would you advise me
to do? If I am in danger how shall I escape from it?"

The woman looked curiously at me, and her eyes glittered with sudden
interest. Her venerable companion replied to my question--

"Escape is quite easy here and now. You have only to follow us and
we will take you out of this wood and escort you to a place of
safety. Then you can return to your own home and forget--"

"Forget what?" I interrupted him.

"All this foolishness"--he answered, with a gentle seriousness--
"This idea of eternal life and love which the artful conjurer Rafel
Santoris has instilled into your too sensitive and credulous
imagination--these fantastic beliefs in the immortality and
individuality of the soul,--and you will accept old age and death
with the sane resignation of ordinary mortals. Such love as he
professes to believe in does not exist,--such life can never be,--
and the secret of his youth--"

"Ah!" I exclaimed eagerly--"Tell me of that! And of Aselzion's
splendid prime when he should be old and feeble? Tell me of that
also!"

For the first time during this interview, my two companions looked
confused. I saw this, and I gained confidence from their evident
embarrassment.

"Why," I pursued--"should you come to me with warnings against those
whom God or Destiny has brought into my life? You may perhaps say
that you yourselves have been sent by God--but does Deity contradict
Itself? I am not conscious of having suffered any evil through Rafel
Santoris or through Aselzion--I am pained and perplexed and tortured
by what I hear and see--but my hearing and sight are capable of
being deceived--why should I think of evil things which are not
proved?"

The woman surveyed me with sudden scorn.

"So you will stay here, the dupe of your own sentiments and
dreams!"--she said, contemptuously--"You, a woman, will remain among
a community of men who are known impostors, and sacrifice your name
and reputation to a mere chimera!"

Her look and manner had completely changed, and I was at once on my
guard.

"My name and reputation are my own to protect,"--I answered, coldly-
-"Whatever I do I shall be ready to answer for to anyone having the
right to ask."

The old man now advanced and laid his hand on my arm. His eyes
sparkled angrily.

"You must be saved from yourself"--he said, sharply, "You must come
with us whether you will or no! We have seen too many victims of
Aselzion's art already--we are resolved to save you from the peril
which threatens you."

And he made an effort to draw me closer to him--but my spirit was up
and I held back with all my force.

"No, I will not go with you!" I exclaimed, hotly--"God alone shall
remove me from harm if any harm is really meant towards me. I do not
believe one word you have said against Rafel Santoris or against
Aselzion--I love the one, and I trust the other!--let me go my own
way in peace!"

Hardly had I spoken these words when both the old man and woman
threw themselves upon me and seizing me by force, endeavoured to
drag me away with them. I resisted with all my strength, still
holding tightly the book of the 'Secret of Life' in one hand. But
their united efforts were beginning to overpower me, and feeling
myself growing weaker and weaker I cried aloud in desperation:

"Rafel! Rafel!"

In an instant I stood free. My captors loosed their hold of me, and
I rushed away, not knowing whither--only running, running, running,
afraid of pursuit--till I suddenly found myself alone on the borders
of a dark stretch of water spreading away in cold blackness to an
unseen horizon.




XVIII

DREAMS WITHIN A DREAM


I stopped abruptly, brought perforce to a standstill. There was
nothing but the black water heaving in front of me with a slow and
dizzying motion and faintly illumined by a dim, pearly light like
that of a waning moon. I looked behind me, fearing my persecutors
were following, and saw that a thick mist filled the air and space
to the obliteration of everything that might otherwise have been
visible. I had thought it was day, and that the sun was shining, but
now it appeared to be night. Utterly fatigued in body and mind, I
sank down wearily on the ground, close to the edge of the strange
dark flood which I could scarcely see. The quiet and deep obscurity
had a lulling effect on my senses--and I thought languidly how good
it would be if I might be allowed to rest where I was for an
indefinite time.

"I can understand"--I said to myself--"why many people long for
death and pray for it as a great blessing! They have lost love--and
without love, life is valueless. To live on and on through cycles of
time in worlds that are empty of all sweetness,--companionless and
deprived of hope and comfort--this would be hell!--not heaven!"

"Hell--not heaven!" said a voice near me.

I started and looked up--a shadowy figure stood beside me--that of a
woman in dark trailing garments, whose face shone with a pale beauty
in the dim light surrounding us both.

"So you have found your way here at last!" she said, gently--"Here,
where all things end, and nothing begins!"

I rose to my feet and confronted her.

"Where all things end!" I repeated--"Surely where life exists there
is no end?"

She gave me a fleeting smile.

"Life is a dream,"--she said--"And the things of life are dreams
within the dream! There are no realities. You imagine truths which
are deceptions."

I looked at her in wonder and bewilderment. She was beautiful--and
the calm sadness of her eyes expressed compassion and tenderness.

"Then--is Creation a lie?" I asked.

She made no immediate answer, but pointed with one hand towards the
dark water. I looked, and uttered a cry of ecstasy--there, shining
in the heaving blackness like a vision from fairyland, was the
'Dream'--glittering from stem to stern with light that sparkled like
millions of diamonds!

"Your Dream of Love!" said the woman beside me--"Behold it for the
last time!"

With straining eyes and beating heart I watched--and saw the shining
vessel begin to sink slowly into the deep watery blackness--down,
down still lower, till only her masts were visible--then something
defiant and forceful sprang up within me,--I would master this
torture, I thought--I would not yield to the agony that threatened
to drive me to utter despair.

"This is a phantom of sorrow!"--I said--"It has no meaning! The love
that is in my heart is my own!--it is my life, my soul, my inmost
being!--it is eternal as God Himself, and to Him I commend it!"

I spoke these words aloud, holding the book of the 'Secret of Life'
clasped to my breast--and raised my eyes trustfully to the dense
darkness which should have been the sky. Then I felt the woman's
hand on mine. Her touch was warm and gentle.

"Come!" she said, softly.

And I saw a small boat slip out on the gloomy water, guided towards
me by One whose face was hidden in a fold of black. My companion
drew me with her and signed to me to enter. Something in myself, as
well as in her looks, impelled me to obey, and as she stepped into
the boat I followed. We were borne along in silence for what seemed
to me a long time, till suddenly I began to hear strange sounds of
wailing, and shuddering cries of appeal, and our darkness was
lightened by the drifting to and fro of pale forms that were
luminous and human in shape though scarcely of human resemblance.

"What are these?" I whispered.

My companion took my hand and held it.

"Listen!" she answered.

And gradually, out of a clamour of weeping and complaint, I heard
voices which uttered distinct things.

"I am the Phantom of Wealth"--said one--"For me men and nations have
rushed on destruction,--for me they have sacrificed happiness and
missed the way to God! For me innocence has been betrayed and honour
murdered. I am but a Shadow, but the world follows me as if I were
Light--I am but the gold dust of earth, and men take me for the
glory of Heaven!"

"I am the Phantom of Fame"--said another--"I come with music and
sweet promises--I float before the eyes of man, seeming to him an
Angel!--I speak of triumph and power!--and for me brave hearts have
broken, and bright spirits have been doomed to despair! I am but a
Shadow--but the world believes me Substance--I am but a breath and a
colour, but men take me for a fixed Star!"

"I am the Phantom of Pride!"--said a third voice--"For me humanity
scales the height of ambition--for my sake king's and queens occupy
uneasy thrones, and surround themselves with pomp and panoply--for
me men lie and cheat and wrong their neighbours--for me the homes
that should be happy are laid waste--for me false laws are made and
evil conquers good I am but a Shadow--and the world takes me for the
Sun!--I am but a passing flash of light, and men take me for the
perfect Day!"

Other voices joined in and echoed wildly around me--and I rose up in
the boat, loosing my hold from the clasp of the woman who was with
me.

"You are phantoms all!" I cried, half unconscious of my own words--
"I want God's angels! Where is Love?"

The voices ceased--the strange flitting figures that wailed round me
faded away into mist, and disappeared--and a light, deep and golden
and wonderful, began to shine through the gloom. My companion spoke.

"We have been looking at dreams,"--she said--"You ask for the only
Real!"

I smiled. A sudden inrush of strength and authority possessed me.

"You bade me look my last upon my dream of Love!" I said--"But you
knew that was impossible, for Love is no dream!"

The golden radiance widened into a perfect splendour, and our boat
now glided over a shining sea. As in a vision I saw the figure that
steered and guided it, change from darkness to brightness--the black
fold fell from its face--Angel eyes looked at me--Angel lips
smiled!--and then--I found myself suddenly alone on the shore of a
little bay, blue as a sapphire in the reflection of the blue sky
above it. The black stretch of water which had seemed so dreary and
impassable had disappeared, and to my astonishment I recognised the
very shore near the rock garden which was immediately under my
turret room. I looked everywhere for the woman who had been in the
boat with me--for the boat itself and its guide--but there was no
trace of them. Where and how far I had wandered I could not imagine-
-but presently, regaining nerve and courage, I began to fancy that
perhaps my strange experience had been preordained and planned as
some test of my faith and fortitude. Had I failed? Surely not! For I
had not doubted the truth of God or the power of Love! There was
only one thing which puzzled me,--the memory of those voices behind
a wall--the voices which had spoken of Rafel's death and treachery.
I could not quite rid myself of the anxiety they had awakened in my
mind though I tried hard not to yield to the temptation of fear and
suspicion. I knew and felt that after all it is the voices of the
world which work most harm to love--and that neither poverty nor
sorrow can cut the threads of affection between lovers so swiftly as
falsehood and calumny. And yet I allowed myself to be moved by vague
uneasiness on this account, and could not entirely regain perfect
composure.

The door of the winding stair leading to my room in the turret stood
open--and I availed myself of this tacit permission to return
thither. I found everything as I had left it, except that when I
sought for the mysterious little room hung with purple silk, where I
had begun to read the book called 'The Secret of Life,' a book which
through all my strange adventure I still had managed to keep with
me, I could not find it. The walls around me were solid; there was
no sign of an opening anywhere.

I sat down by the window to think. There before my eyes was the sea,
calm, and in the full radiance of a brilliant sun. No mysterious or
magic art suggested itself in the visible scene of a smiling summer
day. Had I been long absent from this room, I wondered? I could not
tell. Time seemed to be annihilated. And so far as I myself was
concerned I desired nothing in this world or the next save just to
know if Rafel Santoris still lived--and--yes!--one other assurance--
to feel that I still possessed the treasure of his love. All the
past, present and future hung on this possibility,--there was
nothing more to hope for or to attain. For if I had lost Love, then
God Himself could give me no comfort, since the essential link with
Divine things was broken.

Gradually a great and soothing quietude stole over me and the cloud
of depression that had hung over my mind began to clear. I thought
of my recent experience with the man and woman who had sought to
'rescue' me, as they said, and how when in sheer desperation I had
called "Rafel! Rafel!" they had suddenly disappeared and left me
free. Surely this was a sufficient proof that I was not forgotten by
him who had professed to love me?--and that his aid might still be
depended upon? Why should I doubt him?

I had placed my book, 'The Secret of Life,' on the table when I re-
entered my room--but now I took it up again, and the pages fell open
at the following passage:--

"When once you possess the inestimable treasure of love, remember
that every effort will be made to snatch it from you. There is
nothing the world envies so much as a happy soul! Those who have
been your dearest friends will turn against you because you have a
joy in which they do not share,--they will unite with your foes to
drag you down from your height of Paradise. The powers of the coarse
and commonplace will be arrayed against you--shafts of disdain and
ridicule will be hurled at your tenderest feelings,--venomous lies
and cruel calumnies will be circulated around you,--all to try and
draw you from the circle of light into darkness and chaos. If you
would stand firm, you must stand within the whirlwind; if you would
maintain the centre-poise of your Soul, you must preserve the
balance of movement,--the radiant and deathless atoms whereof your
Body and Spirit are composed must be under steady control and
complete organisation like a well disciplined army, otherwise the
disintegrating forces set up by the malign influences of others
around you will not only attack your happiness, but your health,
break down your strength and murder your peace. Love is the only
glory of Life,--the Heart and Pulse of all things,--a possession
denied to earth's greatest conquerors--a talisman which opens all
the secrets of Nature--a Divinity whose power is limitless, and
whose benediction bestows all beauty, all sweetness, all joy! Bear
this in mind, and never forget how such a gift is grudged to those
who have it by those who have it not!"

Reading thus far, a light began to break in upon me. Had not all the
weird and inexplicable experience of the past hours (or days) tended
to shake me from Love and destroy my allegiance to the ideal I
cherished? And--had I yielded to the temptation? Had I failed? I
dared not estimate either failure or success!

Leaving my place at the window, I saw that the little 'lift' or
dresser in the wall had come up noiselessly with its usual daintily
prepared refection of fruit and bread and deliciously cool spring
water. I had felt neither hunger nor thirst during my strange
wanderings in unknown places, but now I was quite ready for a meal,
and enjoyed it with all the zest of an unspoilt appetite. When I had
finished, I returned to my precious book, and placing it on the
table, I propped up my head between my two hands and set myself
resolutely to study. And I write down here the passages I read,
exactly as I found them, for those who care to practise the lessons
they teach.

FREE-WILL

"The exercise of the Will is practically limitless. It is left
unfettered so that we may be free to make our own choice of life and
evolve our own destiny. It can command all things save Love, for
Love is of God and God is not subject to authority. Love must be
born IN the Soul and OF the Soul. It must be a dual flame,--that is
to say, it must find its counterpart in another Soul which is its
ordained mate, before it can fulfil its highest needs. Then, like
two wings moved by the same soaring impulse, it assists the Will and
carries it to the highest heaven. Through its force life is
generated and preserved--without it, life escapes to other phases to
find its love again. Nothing is perfect, nothing is lasting without
the light and fire of this dual flame. It cannot be WILLED either to
kindle or to burn; it must be born of itself and IN itself, and shed
its glory on the souls of its own choice. All else is subject to
order and command. Love alone is free."

POWER

"Power over all things and all men is obtained by organisation--that
is to say, 'setting one's house in order.' The 'house' implied is
the body in which the Soul has temporary dwelling; every corner of
it must be 'in order,'--every atom working healthfully in its place
without any suggestion of confusion. Then, whatever is desired shall
be attained. Nothing in the Universe can resist the force of a
steadfastly fixed resolve; what the Spirit truly seeks must, by
eternal law, be given to it, and what the body needs for the
fulfilment of the Spirit's commands will be bestowed. From the
sunlight and the air and the hidden things of space strength shall
be daily and hourly renewed; everything in Nature shall aid in
bringing to the resolved Soul that which it demands. There is
nothing within the circle of Creation that can resist its influence.
Success, wealth, triumph upon triumph come to every human being who
daily 'sets his house in order'--whom nothing can move from his
fixed intent,--whom no malice can shake, no derision drive from his
determined goal,--whom no temptation can drag from his appointed
course, and who is proof against spite and calumny. For men's minds
are for the most part like the shifting sands of the sea, and he
alone rules who evolves Order from Chaos."

ETERNAL LIFE

"Life is eternal because it cannot die. Everything that lives MUST
live for ever. Everything that lives has ALWAYS lived. What is
called death, is by law impossible. Life is perpetually changing
into various forms,--and every change it makes we call 'death'
because to us it seems a cessation of life, whereas it is simply
renewed activity. Every soul imprisoned to-day in human form has
lived in human form before,--the very rose that flowers on its stem
has flowered in this world before. Each individual Spirit preserves
its individuality and, to a certain extent, its memory. It is
permitted to remember a few out of the million incidents and
episodes with which its psychic brain is stored, but ONLY a few
during its period of evolvement. When it reaches the utmost height
of spiritual capacity, and is strong enough to know and see and
understand, then it will remember all from the beginning. Nothing
can ever be forgotten, inasmuch as forgetfulness implies waste, and
there is no waste in the scheme of the Universe. Every thought is
kept for use,--every word, every sigh and tear is recorded. Life
itself, in our limited view of it, can be continued indefinitely on
this earth, if we use the means given to us to preserve and renew
it. It was easy to preserve and prolong it in the early days of the
world's prime, for our planet was then nearer to the sun. In the
present day it is returning to a position in the heavens which
encourages and sustains life--and men live longer without knowing
why, never thinking that it is the result of the immediate situation
of the planet with regard to the sun. The Earth is not where it was
in the days of Christ; it has been rushing through space these two
thousand years, and yet mankind forgets that its place in the
heavens is different from that which it formerly occupied, and that
with this difference the laws of climate, custom and living are
changed. It is not Man who alters his surroundings--it is Nature,
whose order cannot be disobeyed. Man thinks that the growth of
science and what he calls his 'progress' is the result of his own
cleverness alone; on the contrary, it is the result of a change in
his atmospheric ether which not only helps scientific explanation
and discovery, but which tends to give him greater power over the
elements, as well as to prolong his life and intellectual
capability. There is no such thing as 'standing still' in the
Universe. Every atom, every organism is doing something, or going
somewhere, and there is no stop. Rest itself is merely a form of
Progress towards Beauty and Perfection, and there is no flaw
anywhere in the majestic splendour of God's scheme for the ultimate
happiness of His entire Creation."

ARROGANT ASCETICISM

"The ascetic is a blasphemer of God and of the work for which God
alone is responsible. By withdrawing himself from the world of men
he withdraws himself from human sympathy. By chastising the body and
its natural emotions and desires, he chastises that which God has
made as a temple for his soul to dwell in. By denying the pleasures
of this world, he denies all the good which God has prepared and
provided for him, and he wrongs the fair happiness of Nature and the
order in which the Universe is planned. The so-called 'religious'
person who retires into a monastery, there to pray and fast and
bemoan the ills of the flesh, is an unnatural creature and
displeasing to his Maker. For God looked upon everything He had made
and found it 'good.' Good--not bad, as the arrogant ascetic would
assume. Joy, not sorrow, should be the keynote of life--the world is
not a 'vale of tears' but a flower-filled garden, basking in the
perpetual sunshine of the smile of God. What is called 'sin' is the
work of Man--God has no part in it. 'By pride the angels fell.' By
pride Man delays his eternal delight. When he presumes to be wiser
than his Creator,--when he endeavours to upset the organisation of
Nature, and invents a kind of natural and moral code of his own,
then comes disaster. The rule of a pure and happy life is to take
all that God sends with thankfulness in moderation--the fruits of
the earth, the joys of the senses, the love of one's fellow-
creatures, the delights of the intellect, the raptures of the soul;
and to find no fault with that which is and must ever be faultless.
We hear of wise men and philosophers sorrowing over 'the pain and
suffering of the world'--but the pain and suffering are wrought by
Man alone, and Man's cruelty to his fellows. From Man's culpable
carelessness and neglect of the laws of health has come every
disease, as from Man's egotism, unbelief and selfishness have sprung
all the crimes in the calendar." I paused here, for it seemed to me
that it was getting dark,--at any rate I could not see to read very
clearly. I looked at the window, but very little light came through
it,--a sudden obscurity, like a heavy cloud, darkened all visible
things. I quickly made up my mind that I would not yield to any more
fanciful terrors, or leave the room, even if I saw another outlet
that night. With this determination I undressed quickly and went to
bed. As I laid my head on the pillow I felt a kind of coldness in
the air which made me shiver a little--an 'uncanny' sensation to
which I would not yield. I saw the darkness thickening round me, and
closed my eyes, resolving to rest--and so succeeded in ordering all
my faculties to this end that within a very few minutes I was
soundly asleep.




XIX

THE UNKNOWN DEEP


My slumber was so profound and dreamless that I have no idea how
long it lasted, but when finally I awoke it was with a sense of the
most vivid and appalling terror. Every nerve in my body seemed
paralysed--I could not move or cry out,--invisible bands stronger
than iron held me a prisoner on my bed--and I could only stare
upwards in horror as a victim bound to the rack might stare at the
pitiless faces of his torturers. A Figure, tall, massive and clothed
in black, stood beside me--I could not see its face--but I felt its
eyes gazing down upon me with a remorseless, cold inquisitiveness--a
silent, searching enquiry which answered itself without words. If
every thought in my brain and every emotion of my soul could have
been cut out of me with a dissecting knife and laid bare to outward
inspection, those terrible eyes, probing deep into the very
innermost recesses of my being, would have done the work.

The beating of my heart sounded loud and insistent in my own ears,--
I lay still, trying to gain control over my trembling spirit,--and
it was almost with an awful sense of relief that I saw the figure
move at last from its rigid attitude and beckon me--beckon slowly
and commandingly with one outstretched arm from which the black,
dank draperies hung like drifting cloud. Mechanically obeying the
signal, I strove to rise from my bed--and found that I could do so,-
-I sat up shiveringly, looking at the terrifying Form that towered
above me, enclosing me as it were in its own shadow--and then,
managing to stand on my feet, though unsteadily, I mutely prepared
to follow where it should lead. It moved on--and I went after it,
compelled by some overpowering instinct against which I dared not
rebel. Once the vague, half-formed thought flitted through my brain-
-"This is Death that summons me away,"--till with the thought came
the remembrance that according to the schooling I was receiving,
there is no such thing as 'Death,' but only the imaginary phantom we
call by that name.

Slowly, sedately, and with an indescribable majesty of movement, the
dark Figure glided on before me, and I, a trembling little creature,
followed it, I knew not whither. There was no obstacle in our
course,--doors, walls and windows seemed to melt asunder into
nothingness as we passed--and there was no stop to our onward
progress till suddenly I saw before me a steep and narrow spiral
stairway of stone winding up into the very centre of a rocky
pinnacle, which in its turn lifted its topmost peak into the
darkness of a night sky sprinkled with millions of stars. The sombre
Figure paused: and again I felt the search-light of its invisible
eyes burning through me. Then, as though satisfied with its brief
survey, it began to ascend the spiral stair.

I followed step by step,--the way was long and difficult--the sharp
turns dizzying to the senses, and there seemed no end to the upward
winding. Sometimes I stumbled and nearly fell--sometimes I groped on
hands and knees, always seeing before me the black-draped Form that
moved on with such apparently little care as to whether or no I
fared ill or well in my obedience to its summons.

And now, as I climbed, all sorts of strange memories began to creep
into the crannies of my brain and perplex me with trouble and
uncertainty. Chiefly did my mind dwell on cruelties--the cruelties
practised by human beings to one another,--moral cruelties
especially, they being so much worse than any physical torture. I
thought of the world's wicked misjudgments passed on those who are
greater in spirit than itself,--how, even when we endeavour to do
good to others, our kindest actions are often represented as merely
so many forms of self-interest and self-seeking,--how our supposed
'best' friends often wrong us and listen credulously to enviously
invented tales against us,--how even in Love--ah!-Love!--that most
etherial yet most powerful of passions!--a rough word, an unmerited
slight, may separate for a lifetime those whose love would otherwise
have been perfect. And still I climbed, and still I thought, and
still the dark Phantom-Figure beckoned me on and on.

And then I began to consider that in climbing to some unknown,
unseen height in deep darkness I was, after all, doing a wiser thing
than living in the world with the ways of the world,--ways that are
for the most part purely hypocritical, and are practised merely to
overreach and out-do one's fellow-men and women--ways of fashion,
ways of society, ways of government which are merely temporary,
while Nature, the invincible and eternal, moves on her appointed
course with the same inborn intuition, namely, to destroy that which
is evil and preserve only that which is good. And Man, the sole
maker of evil, the only opposer of Divine Order, fools himself into
the belief that his evil shall prosper and his falsehood be accepted
as truth, if he can only sham a sufficient show of religious faith
to deceive himself and others on the ascending plane of History. He
who has invented Sin has likewise invented a God to pardon it, for
there is no sin in the natural Universe. The Divine Law cannot
pardon, for it is inviolate and bears no trespass without
punishment.

So I mused in my inward self, and still I climbed, keeping my eyes
fixed on the Figure that led me on, and which now, having reached
the end of the spiral stair, was slowly mounting to the highest peak
of the rocky pinnacle which lifted itself to the stars. An icy wind
began to blow,--my feet were bare, and I was thinly clad in my
night-gear with only the addition of a white woollen wrap I had
hastily flung round me for warmth when I left my bed to follow my
spectral leader--and I shivered through and through with the bitter
cold. Yet I went on resolutely,--indeed, having started on this
perilous adventure, there was no returning, for when I looked back
on the way I had come, the spiral stair had completely vanished, and
there was nothing but black and empty space!

This discovery so terrified me that for the moment I lost breath,
and I came to a halt in the very act of ascending. Then I saw the
Figure in front of me turn round with a threatening movement, and I
felt that with one second more of hesitation I should lose my
footing altogether and slip away into some vast abysmal depth of
unimaginable doom. Making a strong effort, I caught back my escaping
self-control, and forced my shuddering limbs to obey my will and
resume their work-and so, slowly, inch by inch, I resumed my climb,
sick with giddiness and fear and chilled to the very heart.
Presently I heard a rumbling roar like the sound of great billows
rushing into hollow caverns which echoed their breaking in thuds of
booming thunder. Looking up, I saw the Figure I had followed
standing still; and I fancied that the sombre draperies in which it
was enveloped showed an outline of glimmering light. Fired by a
sudden hope, I set myself to tread the difficult path anew, and
presently I too stood still, beside my mysterious Leader. Above me
was a heaven of stars;--below an unfathomable deep of darkness where
nothing was visible;--but from this nothingness arose a mighty
turbulence as of an angry sea. I remained where I found myself,
afraid to move;--one false step might, I felt, hurl me into a
destruction which though it would not be actual death would
certainly be something like chaos. Almost I felt inclined to catch
at the cloudy garments of the solemn Figure at my side for safety
and protection, and while this desire was yet upon me it turned its
veiled head towards me and spoke in a low, deep tone that was
infinitely gentle.

"So far!--and yet not far enough!" it said--"To what end wilt thou
adventure for the sake of Love?"

"To no End whatsoever,"--I answered with sudden boldness--"But to
everlasting Continuance!"

Again I thought I saw a faint glowing light within its sombre
draperies.

"What wouldst thou do for Love?" its voice again enquired--"Wouldst
thou bear all things and believe all things? Canst thou listen to
falsehood bearing witness against truth, and yet love on? Wilt thou
endure all suffering, all misunderstanding, all coldness and
cruelty, and yet keep thy soul bright as a burning lamp with the
flame of faith and endeavour? Wouldst thou scale the heavens and
plunge to the uttermost hell for the sake of him thou lovest,
knowing that thy love must make him one with thee at the God-
appointed hour?"

I looked up at the Figure, vainly striving to see its face.

"All these things I would do!" I answered--"All that is in the power
of my soul to endure mortally or immortally, I will bear for Love's
sake!"

Again the light flashed through its black garments. When it next
spoke, its voice rang out harshly in ominous warning.

"Thy lover is dead!" it proclaimed--"He has passed from this sphere
to another, and ye shall not meet again for many cycles of time!
DOST THOU BELIEVE IT?"

A cold agony gripped my breast, but I would not yield to it, and
answered resolutely--

"No! I do not believe it! He could not die without my knowing and
feeling the parting of his soul from mine!"

There was a pause, in which only the thunder of that invisible sea
far down below us was audible. Then the voice went on,

"Thy lover is false!" it said--"His love for thee was a passing
mood--already he regrets--already he wearies in thought of thee and
loves thee no more! DOST THOU BELIEVE IT?"

I took no time for thought, but answered at once without hesitation-
-

"No! For if he does not love me his Spirit lies!--and no Spirit CAN
lie!"

Another pause. Then the voice put this question--

"Dost thou truly believe in God, thy Creator, the Maker of heaven
and earth?"

Lifting my eyes half in hope, half in appeal to the starry deep sky
above me, I replied fervently--

"I do believe in Him with all my soul!"

A silence followed which seemed long and weighted with suspense.
Then the voice spoke once more--

"Dost thou believe in Love, the generator of Life and the moving
Cause and Mind of all created things?"

And again I replied--

"With all my soul!"

The Figure now bent slightly towards me, and the light within its
darkness became more denned and brilliant. Presently an arm and
hand, white and radiant--a shape as of living flame--was slowly
outstretched from the enfolding black draperies. It pointed steadily
to the abyss below me.

"If thy love is so great"--said the voice--"If thy faith is so
strong--if thy trust in God is sure and perfect--descend thither!"

I heard--but could not credit my own hearing. I gazed at the
shrouded and veiled speaker--at the commanding arm that signed my
mortal body to destruction. For a moment I was lost in wild terror
and wilder doubt. Was this fearful suggestion a temptation or a
test? Should it be obeyed? I strove to find the centre-poise of my
own self--to gather all my forces together,--to make myself sure of
my own will and responsible for my own deeds,--and then--then I
paused. All that was purely mortal in me shuddered on the brink of
the Unknown. One look upward to the soft gloom of the purple sky and
its myriad stars--one horrified glance downward at the dark depth
where I heard the roaring of the sea! I clasped my hands in a kind
of prayerful desperation, and looked once more at the solemn Shadow
beside me.

"If thy love is so great!" it repeated, in slow and impressive
tones--"If thy faith is so strong! If thy trust in God is so sure
and perfect!"

There came a moment of tense stillness--a moment in which my life
seemed detached from myself so that I held it like a palpitating
separate creature in my hands, Suddenly the recollection of the last
vision of all those I had seen among the dark mountains of Coruisk
came back to me vividly--that of the woman who had knelt outside a
barred gate in Heaven, waiting to enter in--"O leave her not always
exiled and alone!" I had prayed then--"Dear God, have pity! Unbar
the gate and let her in! She has waited so long!"

A sob broke unconsciously from my lips--my eyes filled with burning
tears that blinded me. Imploringly I turned towards the relentless
Figure beside me once more--its hand still pointed downwards--and
again I seemed to hear the words--

"If thy love is so great! If thy faith is so strong! If thy trust in
God is so sure and perfect!"

And then I suddenly found my own Soul's centre,--the very basis of
my own actual being--and standing firmly upon that plane of
imperishable force, I came to a quick resolve.

"Nothing can destroy me!" I said within myself--"Nothing can slay
the immortal part of me, and nothing can separate my soul from the
soul of my beloved! In all earth, in all heaven, there is no cause
for fear!"

Hesitating no longer, I closed my eyes,--then extending my clasped
hands I threw myself forward and plunged into the darkness!--down,
down, interminably down! A light followed me like a meteoric shaft
of luminance piercing the blackness--I retained sufficient
consciousness to wonder at its brilliancy, and for a time I was
borne along in my descent as though on wings. Down, still down!--and
I saw ocean at my feet!--a heaving mass of angry waters flecked with
a wool-like fleece of foam!

"The Change that is called Death, but which is Life!"

This was the only clear thought that flashed like lightning through
my brain as I sank swiftly towards the engulfing desert of the sea!-
-then everything swirled into darkness and silence!

                         *     *     *
                            *     *
                               *

A delicate warm glow like the filtering of sunbeams through shaded
silk and crystal--a fragrance of roses--a delicious sound of harp-
like music--to these things I was gradually awakened by a gentle
pressure on my brows. I looked up--and my whole heart relieved
itself in a long deep sigh of ecstasy!--it was Aselzion himself who
bent over me,--Aselzion whose grave blue eyes watched me with
earnest and anxious solicitude. I smiled up at him in response to
his wordless questioning as to how I felt, and would have risen but
that he imperatively signed to me to lie still.

"Rest!" he said,--and his voice was very low and tender. "Rest, poor
child! You have done more than well!"

Another sigh of pure happiness escaped me,--I stretched out my arms
lazily like one aroused from a long and refreshing slumber. My
sensations were now perfectly exquisite; a fresh and radiant life
seemed pouring itself through my veins, and I was content to remain
a perfectly passive recipient of such an inflow of health and joy.
The room I found myself in was new to me--it seemed made up of
lovely colourings and a profusion of sweet flowers--I lay enshrined
as it were in the centre of a little temple of beauty. I had no
desire to move or to speak,--every trouble, every difficulty had
passed from my mind, and I watched Aselzion dreamily as he brought a
chair to the side of my couch and sat down--then, taking my hand in
his, felt my pulse with an air of close attention.

I smiled again.

"Does it still beat?" I asked, finding my voice suddenly--"Surely
the great sea has drowned it!"

Still holding my hand, he looked full into my eyes.

"'Many waters cannot quench love'!" he quoted softly. "Dear child,
you have proved that truth. Be satisfied!"

Raising myself on my pillows, I studied his grave face with an
earnest scrutiny.

"Tell me,"--I half whispered--"Have I failed?"

He pressed my hand encouragingly.

"No! You have almost conquered!"

Almost! Only 'almost'! I sank back again on the couch, wondering and
waiting. He remained beside me quite silent. After a little the
tension of suspense became unbearable and I spoke again--

"How did I escape?" I asked--"Who saved me when I fell?"

He smiled gravely.

"There was nothing to escape from"--he answered--"And no one saved
you since you were not in danger."

"Not in danger!" I echoed, amazed.

"No! Only from yourself!"

I gazed at him, utterly bewildered. He gave me a kind and reassuring
glance.

"Have patience!" he said, gently--"All shall be explained to you in
good time! Meanwhile this apartment is yours for the rest of your
stay here, which will not now be long--I have had all your things
removed from the Probation room in the tower, so that you will no
more be troubled by its scenic transformations!" Here he smiled
again. "I will leave you now to recover from the terrors through
which you have passed so bravely;--rest and refresh yourself
thoroughly, for you have nothing more to fear. When you are quite
ready touch this"--and he pointed to a bell--"I shall hear its
summons and will come to you at once."

Before I could say a word to detain him, he had retired, and I was
left alone.

I rose from my couch,--and the first impression I had was that of a
singular ease and lightness--a sense of physical strength and well-
being that was delightful beyond expression. The loveliness and
peace of the room in which I was enchanted me,--everything my eyes
rested upon suggested beauty. The windows were shaded with rose silk
hangings--and when I drew these aside I looked out on a marble
loggia or balcony overhung with climbing roses,--this, in its turn,
opened on an exquisite glimpse of garden and blue sea. There was no
clock anywhere to tell me the time of day, but the sun was shining,
and I imagined it must be afternoon. Adjoining this luxurious
apartment was an equally luxurious bathroom, furnished with every
conceivable elegance,--the bath itself was of marble, and the water
bubbled up from its centre like a natural spring, sparkling as it
came. I found all my clothes, books and other belongings arranged
with care where I could most easily get at them, and to my joy the
book 'The Secret of Life,' which I thought I had lost on my last
perilous adventure, lay on a small table by itself like a treasure
set apart.

I bathed and dressed quickly, allowing myself no time to think upon
any strange or perplexing point in my adventures, but giving myself
entirely up to the joy of the new and ecstatic life which thrilled
through me. A mirror in the room showed me my own face, happy and
radiant,--my own eyes bright and smiling,--no care seemed to have
left a trace on my features, and I was fully conscious of a perfect
strength and health that made the mere act of breathing a pleasure.
In a very short time I was ready to receive Aselzion, and I touched
the bell he had indicated as a signal. Then I sat down by the window
and looked out on the fair prospect before me. How glorious was the
world, I thought!--how full of perfect beauty! That heavenly blue of
sky and sea melting into one--the tender hues of the clambering
roses against the green of the surrounding foliage--the lovely light
that filtered through the air like powdered gold!--were not all
these things to be thankful for? and can there be any real
unhappiness so long as our Souls are in tune with the complete
harmony of Creation?

Hearing a step behind me, I rose--and with a glad smile stretched
out my hands to Aselzion, who had just then entered. He took them in
his own and pressed them lightly--then drawing a chair opposite to
mine, he sat down. His face expressed a certain gravity, and his
voice when he began to speak was low and gentle.

"I have much to tell you"--he said--"but I will make it as brief as
I can. You came here to pass a certain psychic ordeal--and you have
passed it successfully--all but the last phase. Of that we will
speak presently. For the moment you are under the impression that
you have been through certain episodes of a more or less perplexing
and painful nature. So you have--but not in the way you think.
Nothing whatever has happened to you, save in your own mind--your
adventures have been purely mental--and were the result of several
brains working on yours and compelling you to see and to hear what
they chose. There!--do not look so startled!"--for I had risen with
an involuntary exclamation--"I will explain everything quite
clearly, and you will soon understand."

He paused--and I sat down again by the window, wondering and
waiting.

"In this world," he went on, slowly--"it is not climate, or natural
surroundings that affect man so much as the influences brought to
bear upon him by his fellow-men. Human beings really live surrounded
by the waves of thought flung off by their own brains and the brains
of those around them,--and this is the reason why, if they are not
strong enough to find a centre-poise, they are influenced by ways
and moods of thought which would never be their own by choice and
free-will. If a mind, or let us say a Soul, can resist the
impressions brought to bear upon it by other forces than itself--if
it can stand alone, clear of obstacle, in the light of the Divine
Image, then it has gained a mastership over all things. But the
attainment of such a position is difficult enough to be generally
impossible. Influences work around us everywhere,--men and women
with great aims in life are swept away from their intentions by the
indifference or discouragement of their friends--brave deeds are
hindered from accomplishment by the suggestion of fears which do not
really exist--and the daily scattering and waste of psychic force
and powerful mentality by disturbing or opposing brain-waves, is
sufficient to make the world a perfect paradise were it used to that
end."

He waited a moment--then bent his eyes earnestly upon me as he
resumed--

"You do not need to be told by me that you have lived on this earth
before, and that you have many times been gently yet forcibly drawn
into connection with the other predestined half of yourself,--that
Soul of love which blindly seeking, you have often rejected when
found--not of yourself have you rejected it--but simply because of
the influences around you to which you have yielded. Now in this
further phase of your existence you have been given another chance--
another opportunity. It is quite possible that had you not come to
me you would have lost your happiness again, and it was this
knowledge which made me receive you, against all the rules of our
Order, when I saw that you were fairly resolved. Your ordeal would
have been longer had you not made the first bold advance yourself on
the occasion of your entrance into our chapel. The light of the
Cross and Star drew you, and your Soul obeyed the attraction of its
native element. Had you opposed its intention by doubts and fears, I
should have had more trouble with you than I should have cared to
undertake. But you made the first step yourself with a rare courage-
-the rest was comparatively easy."

He paused again and again went on.

"I have already said that you are under the impression of having
gone through certain adventures or episodes, which have more or less
distressed and perplexed you. These things have had NO EXISTENCE
except in your mind! When I took you up to your room in the turret,
I placed you under my influence and under the influence of four
other brains acting in conjunction with myself. We took entire
possession of your mentality, and made it as far as possible like a
blank slate, on which we wrote what we chose. The test was to see
whether your Soul, which is the actual You, could withstand and
overcome our suggestions. At first hearing, this sounds as if we had
played a trick upon you for our own entertainment--but it is not
so,--it is merely an application of the most powerful lesson in
life--namely, THE RESISTANCE AND CONQUEST OF THE INFLUENCES OF
OTHERS, which are the most disturbing and weakening forces we have
to contend with."

I began to see clearly what he meant me to understand, and I hung
upon his words with eager attention.

"You have only to look about you in the world," he continued--"to
realise the truth of what I say. Every day you may meet some soul
whose powers of accomplishment might be superb if it were not for
the restricting influences to which it allows itself to succumb. How
often do you not come upon a man or woman of brilliant genius, who
is nevertheless rendered incompetent by opposing influences, and who
therefore lives the life of a bird in a cage! Take the thousands of
men wrongly mated, whose very wives and children drag them down and
kill every spark of ambition and accomplishment within them! Take
the thousands of women persuaded or forced into unions with men
whose low estimate of woman's intellect coarsens and degrades her to
a level from which it is almost impossible to rise! This is the
curse of 'influences'--the magnetic currents of other brains which
set our own awry, and make half the trouble and mischief in the
world. Not one soul in a hundred thousand has force or courage to
resist them! The man accustomed to live with a wife who without
doing any other harm, simply kills his genius by the mere fact of
her daily contact, moods, and methods, makes no effort to shake
himself free from the apathy her influence causes, but simply sinks
passively into inaction. The woman, bound to a man who insists on
considering her lower than himself, and often pulled this way and
that by the selfish desires or aims of her children or other family
belongings, becomes a mere domestic drudge or machine, with no
higher aims than are contained in the general ordering of household
business. Love,--the miraculous touchstone which turns everything to
gold,--is driven out of the circle of Life with the result that Life
itself grows weary of its present phase, and makes haste to seek
another more congenial. Hence proceeds what we call age and death."

I was about to interrupt by an eager question--but he silenced me by
a gesture.

"Your position," he went on--"from a psychic standard,--which is the
only necessary, because the only lasting attitude,--is that of being
brought into connection with the other half of your spiritual and
immortal Ego,--which means the possession of perfect love, and with
it perfect life. And because this is so great a gift, and so
entirely Divine, influences are bound to offer opposition in order
that the Soul may make its choice VOLUNTARILY. Therefore, when I,
and the other brains acting with me, placed you under our power, we
impressed you with all that most readily shakes the feminine mind--
doubt, jealousy, suspicion, and all the wretched terrors these
wretched emotions engender. We suggested the death of Rafel Santoris
as well as his treachery,--you heard, as you thought, voices behind
a wall--but there were no voices--only the suggestion of voices in
your mind. You saw strange phantoms and shadows,--they had no
existence except in so far as we made them exist and present
themselves to your mental vision. You wandered away into unknown
places, so you imagined,--but as a matter of fact you NEVER LEFT
YOUR ROOM!"

"Never left my room!" I echoed--"Oh, that cannot be!"

"It can be, because it is!" he answered me, smiling gravely--"The
only thing in your experience that was REAL was the finding of the
book 'The Secret of Life'--in the purple-draped shrine. Here it is"-
-and he took it up from the table on which it lay--"and if you had
turned it over a little more, you would have found this"--and he
read aloud--

"'All action is the material result of Thought. Suffering is the
result of THINKING INTO PAIN--disease the result of THINKING INTO
WEAKNESS. Every emotion is the result of wrong or right THINKING,
with one exception--Love. Love is not an Emotion but a Principle,
and as the generator of Life pervades all things, and is all things.
Thought, working WITHIN this Principle, creates the things of beauty
and lastingness,--Thought, working OUTSIDE this Principle, equally
creates the things of terror, doubt, confusion, and destruction.
There is no other Secret of Life--no other Elixir of Youth--no other
Immortality!'"

He pronounced the last words with gentle and impressive emphasis,
and a great sweetness and calm filled my mind as I listened.

"I--or I should say we--for four of my Brethren were deeply
interested in you on account of the courage you had shown--we took
you up to the utmost height of endurance in the way of mental
terror--and, to our great joy, found your Soul strong enough to
baffle and conquer the ultimate suggestion of Death itself. You held
firmly to the truth that there is NO death, and with that spiritual
certainty risked all for Love. Now we have released you from our
spells!"--and his eyes were full of kindness as he looked at me--
"and I want to know if you thoroughly realise the importance of the
lesson we have taught?"

I met his enquiring glance fully and steadily.

"I think I do,"--I said--"You mean that I must stand alone?"

"Alone, yet not alone!"--he answered, and his fine face was
transfigured into light with its intense feeling and power--"Alone
with Love!--which is to say alone with God, and therefore surrounded
by all god-like, lasting and revivifying things. You will go back
from this place to the world of conventions,--and you will meet a
million influences to turn you from your chosen way. Opinion,
criticism, ridicule, calumny and downright misunderstanding--these
will come out against you like armed foes, bristling at every point
with weapons of offence. If you tell them of your quest of life and
youth and love, and of your experience here, they will cover you
with their mockery and derision--if you were to breathe a word of
the love between you and Rafel Santoris, a thousand efforts would be
instantly made to separate you, one from the other, and snatch away
the happiness you have won. How will you endure these trials?--what
will be your method of action?"

I thought a moment.

"The same that I have tried to practise here"--I answered--"I shall
believe nothing of ill report--but only of good."

He bent his eyes upon me searchingly.

"Remember," he said--"what force there is in a storm of opinion! The
fiercest gale that ever blew down strong trees and made havoc of
men's dwellings is a mere whisper compared with the fury of human
minds set to destroy one heaven-aspiring soul! Think of the petty
grudge borne by the loveless against Love!--the spite of the
restless and unhappy against those who have won peace! All this you
will have to bear,--for the world is envious--and even a friend
breaks down in the strength of friendship when thwarted or rendered
jealous by a greater and more resistless power!" I sighed a little.

"I have few friends,"--I said--"Certainly none that have ever
thought it worth while to know my inner and truest self. Most of
them are glad to be my friends if I go THEIR way--but if I choose a
way of my own their 'friendship' becomes mere quarrel. But I talk of
choosing a way! How can I choose--yet? You say my ordeal is not
over?"

"It will be over to-night,"--he answered--"And I have every hope
that you will pass through it unflinchingly. You have not heard from
Santoris?"

The question gave me a little thrill of surprise.

"Heard from him?--No"--I replied--"He never suggested writing to
me."

Aselzion smiled.

"He is too closely in touch with you to need other correspondence,"-
-he said--"But be satisfied that he is safe and well. No
misadventure has befallen him."

"Thank God!" I murmured. "And--if--"

"If he loves you no more,"--went on Aselzion--"If he has made an
'error of selection' as the scientists would say, and is not even
now sure of his predestined helper and inspirer whose love will lift
him to the highest attainment--what then?"

"What then? Why, I must submit!" I answered, slowly--"I can wait,
even for another thousand years!"

There was a silence, during which I felt Aselzion's eyes upon me.
Then he spoke again in a lighter tone.

"Let us for the moment talk of what the world calls 'miracle'"--he
said--"I believe you are just now conscious of perfect health, and
of a certain joy in the mere fact of life. Is it not so?"

Smiling, I bent my head in acquiescence.

"Understand then"--he continued--"that while you control the life-
forces of which you are made, by the power of an all-commanding
spirit, this perfect health, this certain joy will continue. And
more than this--everything in Nature will serve you to this end. You
have but to ask your servants and they will obey. Ask of the sun its
warmth and radiance,--it will answer with a quick bestowal--ask of
the storm and wind and rain their powers of passion,--they will give
you their all,--ask of the rose its fragrance and colour, and the
very essence of it shall steal into your blood,--there is nothing
you shall seek that you will not find. Try your own powers now!"--
and with the word he got up and opened the window a little wider,
then signed to me to step out on the balcony--"Here are roses
climbing up on their appointed way--bend them to-wards you by a
single effort of the will!"

I gazed at him in complete surprise and bewilderment. His answering
looks were imperative.

"By a single effort of the will!" he repeated.

I obeyed him. Raising my eyes to the roses where they clambered
upwards round the loggia, I inwardly commanded them to turn towards
me. The effect was instantaneous. As though blown by a light breeze
they all bent down with their burden of bright blossom--some of the
flowers touching my hands.

"That would be called 'miraculous' by the ignorant," said Aselzion--
"And it is nothing more than the physical force of the magnetic
light-rays within you, which, being focused in a single effort, draw
the roses down pliantly to your will. No more miracle is there in
this than that of the common magnet which has been vainly trying to
teach us lessons about ourselves these many years. Now, relax your
will!"

Again I obeyed, and the roses moved gently away and upward to their
former branching height.

"This is an object lesson for you,"--said Aselzion, smiling then--
"You must understand that you are now in a position to draw
everything to you as easily as you drew those roses! You can draw
the germs of health and life to mix and mingle with your blood--or--
you can equally draw the germs of disease and disintegration. The
ACTION is with you. From the sun you can draw fresh fuel for your
brain and nerves--from the air the sustenance you demand--from
beautiful things their beauty, from wise things their learning, from
powerful things their force--NOTHING can resist the radiating energy
you possess if you only remember HOW to employ it. In every action
it must be focused on the given point--it must not be disturbed or
scattered. The more often it is used the more powerful it becomes--
the more all-conquering. But never forget that it must work WITHIN
the Creative Principle of Love--not outside it."

I sat absorbed and half afraid.

"And to-night--?" I said, softly.

He rose from his chair and stood up to his full superb stature,
looking down upon me with a certain mingling of kindness and pity.

"To-night,"--he replied--"we shall send for you! You will confront
the Brethren, as one who has passed the same mental test through
which they are passing! And you will face the last fear! I do not
think you will go back upon yourself--I hope not--I strongly desire
you to keep your courage to the end!"

I ventured to touch his hand.

"And afterwards?" I queried.

He smiled.

"Afterwards--Life and its secrets are all with you and Love!"




XX

INTO THE LIGHT


When I was left alone once more I gave myself up to the enchanting
sense of perfect happiness that now seemed to possess my whole
being. The world of glorious Nature showed me an aspect of
brilliancy and beauty that could no more be shadowed by fear or
foreboding--it was a mirror in which I saw reflected the perfect
Mind of the Divine. Nothing existed to terrify or daunt the
advancing Soul which had become cognisant of its own capabilities,
and which, by the very laws governing it, is preordained to rise to
the utmost height of supernal power. I had dimly guessed this truth-
-but I had never surely known it till now. Now, I recognised that
everything is and must be subservient to this interior force which
exists to 'replenish the earth and subdue it'--and that nothing can
hinder the accomplishment of its resolved Will. As I sat by the
window thinking and dreaming, I began to wonder what would be the
nature of that 'last fear' of which Aselzion had spoken? Why should
the word 'fear' be mentioned, when there was no cause for fear of
any kind? Fear can only arise from a sense of cowardice,--and
cowardice is the offspring of weakness. From this argument it
followed that my strength was not yet thoroughly tested to
Aselzion's satisfaction,--that he still thought it possible that
some latent weakness in my spirit might display itself on further
trial. And I resolved that if such was his idea, he should be proved
wrong. Nothing, I vowed, should move me now--not all the world
arrayed in arms against me should hinder my advance towards the
completion of myself in the love of my Beloved!

I have already said that there was no visible chronicle of time in
the House of Aselzion, save such as was evidenced by the broadening
or waning light of day. Just now I knew it was late afternoon, as
the window where I sat faced the west, and the sun was sinking in a
blaze of glory immediately opposite to me. Bars of gold and purple
and pale blue formed a kind of cloud gateway across the heavens, and
behind this the splendid orb shone in a halo of deep rose. Watching
the royal pageantry of colour on all sides, I allowed myself to go
forth as it were in spirit to meet and absorb it,--inwardly I set my
whole being in tune with the great wave of light which opened itself
over the sea and land, and as I did so found every nerve in my body
thrilled with responsive ecstasy, even as harpstrings may be
thrilled into sound by the sweep of the wind. I rose and went out,
through the loggia into the garden--feeling more like a disembodied
spirit than a mortal, so light and free and joyous were my very
movements--so entirely in unison was I with everything in Nature.
The sunset bathed me in its ruby and purple magnificence,--I lifted
my eyes to the heavens and murmured almost unconsciously--"Thank God
for Life! Thank God for Love! Thank God for all that Life and Love
must bring to me!"

A sea-gull soaring inland flew over my head with a little cry--its
graceful poise reminded me of the days I had passed in Morton
Harland's yacht, when I had watched so many of these snow-white
creatures dipping into the waves, and soaring up again to the skies-
-and on a sudden impulse I stretched out my hand, determining to
stay the bird's flight if I could and bring it down to me. The
effort succeeded,--slowly, and as if checked by some obstacle it
felt but could not see, the lovely winged thing swept round and
round in an ever descending circle and finally alighted on my wrist.
I held it so for a moment--it turned its head towards me, its ruby-
brown eyes sparkling in the sun--then I tossed it off again into the
air of its own freedom, where after another circling sweep or two it
disappeared, and I walked on in a happy reverie, realising that what
I could do with the visible things of Nature I could do as easily
with the invisible. A sense of power vibrated through me [Footnote:
The philosophy of Plato teaches that Man originally by the power of
the Divine Image within him could control all Nature, but gradually
lost this power through his own fault.]--power to command, and power
to resist,--power that forbade all hesitation, vacillation or
uncertainty--power which being connected by both physical and
spiritual currents with this planet, the Earth, and the atmosphere
by which it is surrounded, lifts all that it desires towards itself,
as it rejects what it does not need.

Returning slowly through the garden, and lingering by the beds of
flowers that adorned it, I noticed how when I bent over any
particular blossom, it raised itself towards me as though drawn
upward by a magnet. I was not inclined to gather a single one for my
own pleasure--some occult sympathy had become established between me
and these beautiful creations--and I could no more sever a rose from
its stem than I could kill a bird that sang its little song to me.
On re-entering my room I found the usual refection prepared for me--
fresh fruit and bread and water--the only kind of food I was
allowed. It was quite sufficient for me,--in fact I had not felt at
any time the sensation of hunger. I began to wonder how long I had
been a 'probationer' in the House of Aselzion? Days or weeks? I
could not tell. I was realising the full truth that with the things
of the infinite time has no existence, and I recalled the verse of
the ancient psalm:

"A thousand ages in Thy sight Are like an evening gone, Short as the
watch that ends the night Before the rising sun."

And while my thoughts ran in this groove, I opened the book of the
'Secret of Life'--and as if in answer to my inward communing, found
the following:

THE DELUSION OF TIME

"Time has no existence outside this planet. Humanity counts its
seasons, its days and hours by the Sun--but beyond the Sun there are
millions and trillions of other and larger suns, compared with which
our guiding orb is but a small star. Out in the infinitude of space
there is no Time, but only Eternity. Therefore the Soul which knows
itself to be eternal should associate Itself with eternal things,
and should never count its existence by years. To its Being there
can be no end--therefore it never ages and never dies. It is only
the sham religionists who talk of death,--it is only the inefficient
and unspiritual who talk of age. The man who allows himself to sink
into feebleness and apathy merely because of the passing of years
has some mental or spiritual weakness in him which he has not the
Will to overcome--the woman who suffers her beauty and freshness to
wane and fade on account of what she or her 'dearest' friends are
pleased to call 'age,' shows that she is destitute of spiritual
self-control. The Soul is always young, and its own radiation can
preserve the youth of the Body in which it dwells. Age and
decrepitude come to those with whom the Soul is 'an unknown
quantity.' The Soul is the only barrier against the forces of
disintegration which break down effete substances in preparation for
the change which humanity calls 'Death.' If the barrier is not
strong enough, the enemy takes the city. These facts are simple and
true; too simple and too true to be accepted by the world. The world
goes to church and asks a Divinity to save its soul, practically
showing in all its ways of society and government an utter disbelief
in the Soul's existence. Men and women die when they might as well
have lived. If we examine into the cause of their deaths we shall
find it in the manner of their lives. Obstinacy and selfishness have
murdered more human beings than any other form of plague. The
blasphemy of sham religion has insulted the majesty of the Creator
more than any other form of sin, and He has answered it by His
Supreme Silence. The man who attends a ritual of prayer which he
does not honestly believe in, merely for the sake of social custom
and observance, is openly deriding his Maker and the priests who
gain their living out of such ritual are trading on the Divine. Let
the people of this Earth be taught that they live not in Time but
Eternity,--that their thoughts, words and deeds are recorded
minutely and accurately--and that each individual human unit is
expected to contribute towards the general beauty and adornment of
God's scheme of Perfection. Every man, every woman, must give of his
or her best. The artist must give his noblest art, not for what it
brings to him personally of gain or renown, but for what it does to
others in the way of uplifting;--the poet must give his highest
thought, not for praise, but for love;--the very craftsman must do
his best and strongest work not for the coin paid, but for the fact
that it is work, and as such must be done well--and none must
imagine that they can waste the forces wherewith they have been
endowed. For no waste and no indolence is permitted, and in the end
no selfishness. The attitude of the selfish human being is pure
disintegration,--a destroying microbe which crumbles and breaks down
the whole constitution, not only ruining the body but the mind, and
frequently making havoc of the very wealth that has been too
selfishly guarded. For wealth is ephemeral as fame--only Love and
the Soul are the lasting things of God, the Makers of Life and the
Rulers of Eternity."

So far I read--then laying down my book I listened. Music, solemn
and exquisitely beautiful, stole on my ears from the far distance--
it seemed to float through the open window as though in a double
chorus--rising from the sea and falling from the heavens. Delicious
harmonies trembled through the air, soft as fine rain falling on
roses,--and with their penetrating tenderness a thousand
suggestions, a thousand memories came to me, all infinitely sweet. I
began to think that even if Rafel Santoris were separated from me by
some mischance, or changed to me in any way, it need not affect me
over-much so long as I cherished the love I had for him in my own
soul. Our passion was of a higher quality than the merely material,-
-it was material and spiritual together, the spiritual
predominating, thus making of it the only passion that can last.
What difference could a few years more or less bring, if we were
bound, by the eternal laws governing us, to become united in the
end? The joy of life is to love rather than to be loved,--and the
recipient of love is never so fully conscious of perfect happiness
as the giver.

The music went on in varying moods of lovely harmony, and my mind,
like a floating cloud, drifted lazily above the waves of sound. I
thought compassionately of the unrest and discontent of thousands
who devote themselves to the smallest and narrowest aims in life,--
people with whom the loss of a mere article of wearing apparel is
more important than a national difficulty--people who devote all
their faculties to social schemes of self-aggrandisement--people who
discuss trifles till discussion is worn threadbare, and ears are
tired and brain is weary--people who, assuming to be religious and
regular church-goers, yet do the meanest things, and have no scruple
in playing the part of tale-bearer and mischief-maker, setting
themselves deliberately to break friendships and destroy love--
people who talk of God as though He were their intimate, and who
have by their very lives drawn everything of God out of them--I
thought of all these, I say--and I thought how different this world
would be if men would hold by the noblest ideals, and suffer the
latent greatness in them to have its way--if they would truly rule
their own universe and not allow its movements to fall into chaos--
how fair life would become!--how replete with health and joy!--what
a paradise would be created around us!--and what constant
benediction we should draw down upon us from the Most High! And
gradually as I sat absorbed in my own reveries the afternoon waned
into twilight, and twilight into dusk--one star brilliant as a great
diamond, flashed out suddenly above a rift of cloud--and a soft
darkness began to creep stealthily over sky and sea. I moved away
from the window and paced slowly up and down the room, waiting and
wondering. The music still continued,--but it had now grown slower
and more solemn, and founded like a great organ being played in a
cathedral. It impressed me with a sense of prayer and praise--more
of praise than prayer, for I had nothing to pray for, God having
given me my own Soul, which was all!

As the darkness deepened, a soft suffused light illumined the room--
and I now noticed that it was the surface of the walls that shone in
this delicate yet luminous way. I put my hand on the wall nearest to
me--it was quite cold to the touch, yet bright to the eyes, and was
no more fatiguing to look at than the sunshine on a landscape. I
could not understand how the light was thus arranged and used, but
its effect was beautiful. As I walked to and fro, looking at the
various graceful and artistic objects which adorned the room, I
perceived an easel, on which a picture was placed with a curtain of
dark velvet drawn across it. Moved by curiosity, I drew the curtain
aside,--and my heart gave a quick bound of delight,--it was an
admirably painted portrait of Rafel Santoris. The grave blue eyes
looked into my own,--a smile rested on the firm, handsome mouth--the
whole picture spoke to me and seemed to ask 'Wherefore didst thou
doubt?' I stood gazing at it for several minutes, enrapt,--realising
how much even the 'counterfeit presentment' of a beloved face may
mean. And then I began to think how strange it is that we never seem
ready to admit the strong insistence of Nature on individuality and
personality. Up at a vast height above the Earth, and looking down
upon a crowd of people from the car of a balloon, or from an
aeroplane, all human beings look the same--just one black mass of
tiny moving units; but, in descending among them, we find every face
and figure wholly different, and though all are made on the same
model there are no two alike. Yet there are many who argue and
maintain that though individual personality in bodies may be
strongly marked, there is no individual personality in souls--ergo,
that Nature thinks so little of the intelligent Spirit inhabiting a
mortal form that she limits individuality to that which is subject
to change and has no care for it in that which is eternal! Such an
hypothesis is absurd on the face of it, since it is the Soul that
gives individuality to the Body. The individual personality of Rafel
Santoris, expressed even in his painted portrait, appealed to me as
being that of one I had loved long and tenderly,--there was no
strangeness in his features but only an adorable familiarity. Long
long ago, in centuries that had proved like mere days down the vista
of time, the Soul in those blue eyes had looked love into mine! I
recognised their tender, half-entreating, half-commanding gaze,--I
knew the little fleeting, wistful smile which said so little and yet
so much--I felt that the striving, ambitious spirit of this man had
sought mine as the help and completion of his own uplifting, and
that I had misunderstood him and turned from him at the crucial
moment when all might have been well. And I studied his picture long
and earnestly, so moved by its aspect that I found myself talking to
it softly as though it were a living thing.

"I wonder if I shall ever meet you again?" I murmured--"Will you
come to me?--or shall I go to you? How shall we find each other?
When shall I be able to tell you that I know you now to be the only
Beloved!--the one centre of my life round which all other things
must for evermore revolve,--the very mainspring of my best thought
and action,--the god of my universe from whose love and pleasure
spring the light and splendour of creation! When shall I see you
again to tell you all that my heart longs to express?--when may I
fold myself in your arms as a bird folds its wings in a nest, and be
at peace, knowing that I have gained the summit of all ambition and
desires in love's perfect union? When shall we attune our lives
together in that harmonious chord which shall sound its music
sweetly through eternity? When shall our Souls make a radiant ONE,
through which God's power and benediction shall vibrate like living
fire, creating within us all beauty, all wisdom, all courage, all
supernal joy?--For this is bound to be our future--but--when?"

Moved by my own imagining, I stretched out my arms to the picture of
my love, and tears filled my eyes. I was nothing but the weakest of
mortals in the sudden recollection of the happiness I might have won
long ago had I been wise in time!

A door opened quietly behind me, and I turned round quickly.
Aselzion's messenger, Honorius, stood before me--and I greeted him
with a smile, though my eyes were wet.

"Have you come to fetch me?"--I asked--"I am ready."

He inclined his head a little.

"You are not quite ready"--he said--and with the word he gave into
my hands a folded garment and veil--"You must attire yourself in
these. I will wait for you outside."

He retired and left me, and I quickly changed my own things for
those which had been brought. They were easily put on, as they
consisted simply of one long white robe of a rather heavy make of
soft silk, and a white veil which covered me from head to foot. My
attiring took me but a few minutes, and when all was done I touched
the bell by which I had previously summoned Aselzion. Honorius
entered at once--his looks were grave and preoccupied.

"If you should not return to this room,"--he said, slowly--"is there
any message--any communication you would like me to convey to your
friends?"

My heart gave a quick bound. There was some actual danger in store
for me, then? I thought for a moment--then smiled.

"None!" I answered--"I shall be able to attend to all such personal
matters myself--afterwards!"

Honorius looked at me, and his handsome but rather stern face was
grave even to melancholy.

"Do not be too sure!"--he said, in a low tone--"It is not my place
to speak, but few pass the ordeal to which you are about to be
subjected. Only two have passed it in ten years."

"And one of these two was--?"

For answer, he pointed to the portrait of Santoris, thus confirming
my instinctive hope and confidence.

"I am not afraid!" I said--"And I am ready to follow you now
wherever you wish me to go."

He made no further remark and, turning round, led the way out of the
apartment.

We went down many stairs and through many corridors,--some dimly
lit, some scarcely illumined at all. The night had now fully come,--
and through one of two of the windows we passed I could see the dark
sky patterned with stars. We came to the domed hall where the
fountain played, and this was illumined by the same strange all-
penetrating light I had previously noticed,--the lovely radiance
played on the spray of the fountain, making the delicate frondage of
ferns and palms and the hues of flowers look like a dream of
fairyland. Passing through the hall, I followed my guide down a dark
narrow passage--then I found myself suddenly alone. Guided by the
surging sound of organ music, I went on,--and all at once saw a
broad stream of light pouring out from the open door of the chapel.
Without a moment's hesitation, I entered--then paused--the symbol of
the Cross and Star flamed opposite to me--and on every side wherever
I looked there were men in white robes with cowls thrown back on
their shoulders, all standing in silent rows, watching me as I came.
My heart beat quickly,--my nerves thrilled--I trembled as I walked,
thankful for the veil that partially protected me from that
multitude of eyes!--eyes that looked at me in wonder, but not
unkindly--eyes that mutely asked questions never to be answered--
eyes that said as plainly as though in actual speech--"Why are you
among us?--you, a woman? Why should you have conquered difficulties
which we have still to overcome? Is it pride, defiance, or ambition
with you?--or is it all love?"

I felt a thousand influences moving around me--the power of many
brains at work silently cross-examined my inner spirit as though it
were a witness in defence of some great argument--but I made up my
mind not to yield to the overpowering nervousness and sudden alarm
of my own position which threatened to shake my self-control. I
fixed my eyes on the glittering symbol of the Cross and Star and
moved on slowly--I must have looked a strangely solitary creature,
draped in white like a victim for sacrifice and walking all alone
towards those burning, darting rays of light which enveloped the
whole of the chapel in a flood of almost blinding splendour. The
music still thundered on round me--and I thought I heard voices far
off singing--I could distinguish words that came falling through the
music, like blossoms falling through rain:

     Into the Light,
     Into the heart of the fire!
   To the innermost core of the deathless flame
     I ascend--I aspire!
   Under me rolls the whirling Earth,
   With the noise of a myriad wheels that run
     Ever round and about the Sun,--
   Over me circles the splendid heaven,
   Strewn with the stars of morn and even,
     And I, the queen
     Of my soul serene,
   Float with my rainbow wings unfurled,
   Alone with Love, 'twixt God and the world!

My heart beat rapidly; every nerve in me trembled--yet I went on
resolvedly, not allowing myself to even think of danger.

And then I saw Aselzion--Aselzion, transfigured into an almost
supernatural beauty of aspect by the radiance which bathed him in
its lustrous glory!--Aselzion, with outstretched hands beckoning me
towards him--and as I approached I instinctively sank on my knees.
The music died away suddenly, and there was a profound silence. I
felt, though I could not see, that the eyes of all present were
fixed upon me. And Aselzion spoke:

"Rise!" he said--and his voice was clear and imperative--"Not here
must thou kneel--not here must thou rest! Rise and go onward!--thou
hast gone far, but the way is still beyond! The gate of the Last
Probation stands open--enter!--and may God be thy Guide!"

I rose as he commanded me,--and a dazzling flash of light struck my
eyes as though the heavens had opened. The blazing Cross and Star
became suddenly severed in two separate portions, dividing asunder
and disclosing what seemed to be a Hall of living fire! Flames of
every colour burned vividly, leaping and falling without pause or
cessation,--it was a kind of open furnace in which surely everything
must be consumed! I looked at Aselzion in silent enquiry--not in
fear--and in equally silent answer he pointed to the glowing vault.
I understood--and without another moment's hesitation I advanced
towards it. As in a dream I heard a kind of murmuring behind me--and
suppressed exclamations from the students or disciples of Aselzion
who were all assembled in the chapel--but I paid no heed to this--my
whole soul was set on fulfilling the last task demanded of me. Step
by step I went on--I passed Aselzion with a smile--

"Good-bye!" I murmured--"We shall meet again!"

And then I advanced towards the leaping flames. I felt their hot
breath on my cheeks--the scorching wind of them lifted my hair
through the folds of my veil--an idea came upon me that for some
cause or other I was now to experience that 'Change which men call
Death'--and that through this means I should meet my Beloved on the
other side of life--and with his name on my lips, and a passionate
appeal to him in my heart, I stepped into the glowing fire.

As I did so, I lost sight of Aselzion--of the chapel and of all
those who watched my movements, and found myself surrounded on all
sides by darting points of light which instead of scorching and
withering me like a blown leaf in a storm, were like cool and
fragrant showers playing all over me! Amazed, I went on--and as I
went grew bolder. At one step I was bathed in a rain of delicate
rays like sparkling diamond and topaz--at another a lovely violet
light shrouded me in its rich hues--at another I walked in melting
azure, like the hues of a summer sky--and the farther in I went the
deeper and more glowing was the light about me. I felt it
penetrating every pore of my skin--I held my hands out to it, and
saw them look transparent in the fine luminance,--and presently,
gaining courage, I threw back my veil and breathed in the radiance,
as one breathes the air! My whole body grew light, and moved as
though it floated rather than walked--I looked with unfatigued,
undazzled eyes at the glittering flames that sparkled harmlessly
about me and which changed to lovely shapes of flowers and leaves
beneath my feet, and arched themselves over my head like branches of
shading trees--and then all at once, down the long vista I caught
sight of a Shape like that of an Angel!--an angel that waited for me
with watchful eyes and outstretched arms!--it was but a moment that
I saw this vision, and yet I knew what it meant, and I pressed on
and on with all my Soul rising in me as it were, to go forth and
reach that Companion of itself which stood waiting with such tender
patience! The light around me now changed to waves of intense
luminance which swept upon me like waves of the sea--and I allowed
myself to be borne along with them, I knew not whither. All at once
I saw a vast Pillar of Fire which seemed to block my way,--pausing a
moment, I looked and saw it break asunder and form the Cross and
Star!--I gazed upward, wondering--its rays descending seemed to
pierce my eyes, my brain, my very soul!--I sprang forward, dazed and
dazzled, murmuring, "Let this be the end!"

Someone caught me in his arms--someone drew me to his breast,
holding me there as if I were the dearest possession of all the
world or life or time could give--and a voice, infinitely tender,
answered me--

"Not the end, but the Endless, my beloved!--Mine at last, and mine
for ever!--in triumph, in victory, in perfect joy!"

And then I knew!--I knew that I had found my love!--that it was
Rafel Santoris who thus held me in his close embrace,--that I had
fulfilled my own desire, which was to prove my faith if not my
worthiness--that I had won all I wanted in this world and the next,
and that nothing could ever separate our Souls, one from the other
again! This is the deep eternal ecstasy of a knowledge divinely
shared by the very angels of God, and of such supernal happiness
nothing can be said or written!

                         *     *     *
                            *     *
                               *

I pen these last words on the deck of the 'Dream' with my Beloved
beside me. The sun is sinking in a glory of crimson--we are about to
anchor in still waters. A rosy light flashes on our wonderful white
sails, which will be presently furled; and we shall sit together,
Rafel and I, watching the night draw its soft dark curtain around
us, and the stars come out in the sky like diamonds embroidered on
deep purple velvet, and listening to the gentle murmur of the little
waves breaking into a rocky corner of the distant shore. And the
evening will close on a day of peace and happiness,--one of the many
unwearying, beautiful days which, like a procession of angels, bring
us new and ever more perfect joy!

More than a year has elapsed since my 'Probation' in the House of
Aselzion,--since we, my Beloved and I, knelt before the Master and
received his blessing on our eternal union. In that brief time I
have lost all my 'worldly' friends and acquaintances,--who have, if
I may so express it, become afraid of me. Afraid, chiefly, because I
possess all that the world can give me without their advice and
assistance--and not only afraid, but offended, because I have found
the Companion of my Soul with whom they have nothing in common. They
look upon me as 'lost to society' and cannot realise how much such
loss is gain! Meanwhile we, Rafel and I, live our own radiant and
happy lives, in full possession of all that makes life sweet and
valuable, and wanting nothing that our own secret forces cannot
supply. Wealth is ours--one of the least among the countless gifts
Nature provides for those among her children who know where to find
her inexhaustible riches--and we also enjoy the perfect health which
accompanies the constant inflowing of an exhaustless vitality. And
though the things we attain seem 'miraculous' to others, so that
even while accepting help and benefit at our hands, they frown and
shake their heads at the attitude we assume towards social
hypocrisies and conventions, we are nevertheless able to create such
'influences' around us, that none come near as without feeling
stronger, better and more content,--and this is the utmost we are
permitted to do for our fellow-creatures, inasmuch as none will
listen to argument, and none will follow advice. The most ardent
soul that ever dwelt in human form cannot lead another soul in the
way of lasting life or lasting happiness if it refuses to go,--and
there is no more absolute truth than this--That each man and each
woman must make his or her own destiny both here and hereafter. This
is the Law which changes not and which can never be subject to the
slightest variation. Forgiveness of sins there is none--since every
trespass against law carries its own punishment. Necessity for
prayer there is none,--since every faithful wish and desire of the
Soul is granted without parley. Necessity for praise there is much!-
-since the Soul lives and grows in the glory of its Creator. And the
whole Secret of Everlasting Life and Happiness is contained in the
full possession and control of the Divine Centre of ourselves--this
'Radia' or living flame, which must be DUAL in order to be perfect,
and which in its completed state, is an eternal Force which nothing
can destroy and nothing can resist. All Nature harmonises with its
action, and from Nature it draws its perpetual sustenance and
increasing power.

To me, and my Beloved, the world is a garden of paradise--rich with
beauty and delight. We live in it as a part of its loveliness--we
draw into our own organisations the warmth of the sunlight, the
glory of colour, the songs of sweet birds, the fragrance of flowers,
and the exquisite vibrations of the light and air. Like two notes of
a perfect chord we sound our lives on the keyboard of the Infinite--
and we know that the music will become fuller and sweeter as the
eternal seasons roll on. If it is asked why there should have been
any necessity to pass through the psychic ordeal imposed on me by
Aselzion, I reply--Look at the world in which men and women
generally live, and say frankly whether its ways are such as to
engender happiness! Look at society--look at politics--look at
commerce--all mere schemes for self-aggrandisement! And more than
all, look at the Sham of modern religion! Is it not too often a mere
blasphemy and affront to the majesty of the Divine? And are not
many, if not all these mistakes against Nature,--these offences
against eternal Law,--the result of Man's own 'influence' working in
opposition to the very decrees of God, which he disobeys even while
recognising that they exist?

The chief point of Aselzion's instruction was the test of the Brain
and Soul against 'influences'--the opposing influences of others--
and this is truly the chief hindrance to all spiritual progress. The
coward sentiment of fear itself is born in us through the influence
of timorous persons--and it is generally the dread of what 'other
people will say' or what 'other people will think' that holds us
back from performing many a noble action. It should be thoroughly
understood that in the eternal advancement of one's own Soul 'other
people' and their influences are hindrances to progress. It does not
matter a jot what anybody thinks or says, provided the central altar
of one's own Spirituality is clear and clean for the steadfast
burning of the dual flame of Life and Love. All opinion, all
criticism becomes absurd in such matters as these and absolutely
worthless.

It does not affect me that anyone outside my sphere of thought
should be incredulous of my beliefs,--nor can it move me from my
happiness to know that persons who live their lives on a lower plane
consider me a fool for electing to live mine on the highest. I take
joy in the fact that even in so selfish and material an age as this,
Aselzion still has his students and disciples,--a mere handful out
of the million, it is true, but still sufficient to keep the
beautiful truth of the Soul's power alive and helpful to the chosen
few. For such who have studied these truths and have mastered them
sufficiently to practise them in the ordinary round of existence,
Life presents an ever living happiness--and offers daily proof that
there is no such thing as Death. Youth remains where Love is, and
Beauty stays with health and vitality. Decay and destruction are
changes which are brought about by apathy of the Will and
indifference to the Soul's existence, and the same Law which gives
the Soul its supreme sovereignty equally works for its release from
effete and inactive substances.

To those who would ask me how I am able to hold and keep the
treasures of life, love and youth, which the majority of mankind are
for ever losing, I answer that I can say no more than I have said,
and the lesson which all may learn is contained in what I have
written. It is no use arguing with those whom no argument will
convince, or trying to teach those who will not be taught. We--my
Beloved and I--can only prove the truth of the Soul's absolute
command over all spiritual, material and elemental forces by our One
life and the way we live it--we, to whom everything that is
necessary and desirable for our progress, comes on demand,--we, whom
Science serves as an Aladdin's lamp, realising every imaginable
delight--we, with whom Love, which with many human beings is judged
the most variable and transitory of emotions, is the very Principle
of Life, the very essence of the waves of the air through which we
move and have our being. The attainment of such happiness as ours is
possible to all, but there is only One Way of Attainment, and the
clue to that Way is in the Soul of each individual human being. Each
one must find it and follow it, regardless of all 'influences' which
may be brought to bear on his or her actions,--each one must
discover the Centre-poise of Life's movement, and firmly abide by
it. It is the Immortal Creature in each one of us whose destiny is
to make eternal progress and advancement through endless phases of
life, love and beauty, and when once we know and admit the actual
existence of this Immortal Centre we shall realise that with it all
things are possible, save Death. Radiating outward from itself, it
can preserve the health and youth of the body it inhabits
indefinitely, till of its own desire it seeks a higher plane of
action,--radiating inwardly, it is an irresistible attractive force
drawing to itself the powers and virtues of the planet on which it
dwells, and making all the forces of visible and invisible Nature
subject to its will and command. This is one of those great Truths
which the world denies, but which it is destined to learn within the
next two thousand years.

If anyone should desire to know the fate of Motion Harland and his
daughter, that fate has been precisely what they themselves brought
about by their way of life and action. Morton Harland himself
'died,' as the world puts it, of a painful and lingering disease
which could have been cured had he chosen to take the means offered
to him through Rafel Santoris. He did not choose,--therefore the end
was inevitable. Catherine married Dr. Brayle, and they two now live
a sufficiently wretched life together,--she, a moping, querulous
invalid, and he as a 'society' physician, possessed of great wealth
and the position wealth brings. We never meet,--our ways are now for
ever sundered. Mine is the upward and onward path--and with my
Beloved I ascend the supernal heights where the Shadow of Evil never
falls, and where the Secret of Life is centred in the Spirit of
Love.

THE END




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