The MONKEY'S FROLIC. A humorous tale, in verse. [Publisher's device] LONDON: GRANT AND GRIFFITH, successors to J. HARRIS, CORNER OF ST. PAUL'S CHURCHYARD. The MONKEY'S FROLIC. A Humorous Tale. [Publisher's device] LONDON: GRANT AND GRIFFITH, successors to JOHN HARRIS, CORNER OF ST. PAUL'S CHURCHYARD. The MONKEY'S FROLIC. Our tale is a true one, from which may be taught A maxim for youth, with utility fraught;-- _If terrors assail you, examine the cause, And all will be well_;--for, by NATURE'S kind laws, Nor Goblins nor Spectres on earth have a station,-- These phantoms are all of ideal creation. [Illustration] A _Monkey_, that comical tricks would be at, His frolics one morning began with the _Cat_; He chatter'd, as much as to say _How d' ye do?_ And _Puss_ look'd her thanks, and politely cried _Mew_! _Pug_ then shook her paw, and they sat down together, _Puss_ washing her face, indicating wet weather. [Illustration] But, mischief the _Monkey_ inclining to harbour, His skill he resolved now to try as a _Barber_.-- A soap-box conveniently lay in the room, "Miss _Puss_," he exclaim'd, "you'll be shaved, I presume?" Then scraping and bowing with grin and grimace, Despite of resistance, he lather'd her face. [Illustration] Now _Pug_ could not find either razor or knife, So _Puss_ ran no hazard of losing her life;-- Yet razor or knife though they could not be had, _Pug_ found what the terrified _Cat_ thought as bad; A knife made of ivory, in use to cut paper, With which Barber _Pug_ now proceeded to scrape her. [Illustration] But _Puss_ on a sudden deserted her station, Disliking (no wonder) the strange operation, And ran round the room without means of escaping; While _Pug_, still determined to give her a scraping, Pursued, and, regardless of struggle or prayer, Fast bound her, at last, to the back of a chair. [Illustration] When, tucking a napkin close under her chin, Each mew of dismay he return'd with a grin; And yelling and chattering they raised such a clatter, That _Susan_ rush'd in to learn what was the matter; When _Pug_, overturning the chair midst the clack, Ran off, leaving _Pussy_ stretched out on her back. [Illustration] The sight was to _Susan_ so curious, that faster She ran _out_ than _in_, to tell _Mistress_ and _Master_; But, when they came up, neither _Puss_ nor the _Shaver_ Was there, to account for improper behaviour;-- For _Pug_ had contrived, amid _Susan's_ alarms, To reach the house-top, with Miss _Puss_ in his arms. [Illustration] Now fearing that _Pug_ or Miss _Puss_ might be maim'd, "Go, fetch a long ladder," the _Master_ exclaim'd; "And bring them down quickly both _Barber_ and _Cat_." "Oh, oh!" thought the _Monkey_, "I _sha'nt suffer that_."-- The ladder was climb'd by a servant so valiant, But _Pug_ with loose tiles soon repulsed the assailant. [Illustration] Against all manoeuvre apparently proof, _Pug_ chatter'd and paced to and fro on the roof, And fondled the _Cat_, and next, pitying her case, He wiped with the napkin the suds from her face; As nurse would a child, then he held her out _so_, While all the spectators kept laughing below. [Illustration] Now seeing him thus to good humour inclined, They thought he might prove more pacific of mind, So mounted the ladder another assailer; When _Pug_, of loose tiles now perceiving a failure, Eluded the grasp of pursuit with a hop, And gained an adjacent and tall chimney-pot. [Illustration] It chanced that the vent of this same chimney led Direct to a chamber, confined to his bed Where lay an old gentleman, ill with the gout, _And wishing some bad fate might thence drag him out!_ _Pug_, missing his footing, 'midst vapour and fume, That instant with _Puss_ tumbled into the room. [Illustration] Grimed over with soot, they kick'd up such a rout, And caper'd the sick man's apartment about, And chatter'd and squall'd in a manner so hideous, Like young imps of darkness, that, not to be tedious, The sufferer forgot both his gout and his prayers, And scamper'd, pursued by these phantoms, down stairs! [Illustration] There sat in the parlour a medical man, And thither _pursued_ and _pursuers_ now ran;-- And _Puss_ and the _Monkey_ grown fiercer and bolder, Physician and Patient seized each by his shoulder, Who raised such a yell, that the _chorus_ resembled A legion of mad-caps from Bedlam assembled! [Illustration] The tumult each wonder-struck inmate alarm'd; At length on assistance they ventured, well arm'd, And entered the scene of dismay and despair,-- When, lo! no invaders of quiet were there! But Doctor and Patient lay stretch'd on the floor, Not wotting of terror a forthcoming cure. [Illustration] The incident soon was of mystery clear'd,-- The owner of _Pug_ and _Grimalkin_ appear'd;-- "My _Monkey_ and _Cat_ have created alarm; I hope," he observed, "you have not taken harm:"-- Then cautiously peering the chamber about, He dragg'd, from the Chimney, both intruders out. [Illustration] Alarm now gave way to good humour and fun,-- "Much harm to my friend," said the Patient, "is done; Your _Ape_ pill and potion has put to the rout, And cured me, I thank him, at once of the _Gout_." He then to the _Monkey_ made reverence profound, Who _salam'd_ politely the company round. [Illustration] The _Doctor_ a lesson thus learn'd, that, despite Of physic, the Gout may be cured by a _fright_: And, since this affair, now and then on the sly In similar cases same means he will try.-- To show that no malice or envy he knew, He shook hands with _Pug_, and each party withdrew. POPULAR NURSERY BOOKS, ONE SHILLING EACH. 1. Alphabet of Goody Two-Shoes. 2. The Children in the Wood. 3. 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