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By: Anonymous

Jokes For All Occasions by Anonymous Jokes For All Occasions

JOKES FOR ALL OCCASIONSPREFACEThe ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves. It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success. Broadly distinguished, there are two methods of telling a story. One uses the extreme of brevity, and makes its chief reliance on the point. The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax...

By: John Kendrick Bangs (1862-1922)

Book cover Idiot at home

The Idiot returns along with Ms Idiot and their two children, Mollie and Tommy, move into their first house in suburbia. What follows are encounters with his companions from his boarding house days, Coffee and Repartee, along with new characters that inhabit suburbia with the unassailable logic of the Idiot and Mrs Idiot regarding various aspects of life in the suburbs, starting with why the knowledge of an egg beater is more important than that of Wagner. Which story is your favourite?

By: Eliza Armstrong

Book cover Teacup Club (Dramatic Reading)

The Teacup Club is formed when Dorothy decides to found an intellectual club of her own - to teach her fiance a lesson! The club’s discussion topics includes Theosophy, Politics and Women in Legislature. The club’s unofficial topics include Emily’s new dress, man-flu and the great mystery of the missing chafing-dish. A witty drama and a comedy of manners, secrets and politics . - Summary by Elizabby Cast List: Cast Narrator: Beth Thomas Evelyn: Jennifer Fournier Emily: Leanne Yau Dorothy: KHand Frances: Beth Thomas Elise: Lydia Marion: Vicki Hibbins Catharine: Michele Eaton Edited by: Michele Eaton and linny Proof listeners: Michele Eaton, Beth Thomas

By: George Gibbs (1870-1942)

Book cover Madcap

Quote: "To the quiet Titine her mistress created an impression of bringing not only herself into the room, but also the violent horse and the whole of the out-of-doors besides." --Chapter 1 of Madcap. --In the same chapter, Hermia Challoner, this force of nature pitted against the nature of her social milieu, laughingly tells her maid, "Better die living--than be living dead." --And thus starts the beginning of an early 20th century quest for something beyond the bored and politely veiled cynicism of class and wealth; beyond oneself. --Add to that a little mischief, a bit of Puckish misdirection. And a bit of romance.

By: Eleanor Hallowell Abbott (1872-1958)

Book cover Rainy Week (Dramatic Reading)

Join this couple in their annual house party where the “guests” becoming unknowing “actors” in their beach house play “Rainy Week” . “To be indeed absolutely explicit experience has proved, with an almost chemical accuracy, that, quite regardless of "age, sex, or previous condition of servitude," this particular combination of Romantic Passion, Psychic Austerity, Tragedy, Ambition, Poignancy, Innocence, And Irritation, cannot be housed together for even one Rainy Week without producing drama!” Cast Narrator/Mrs...

By: Fyodor Dostoyevsky (1821-1881)

Book cover Crocodile

Ivan Matveich, the most ordinary person you might hope to meet, is swallowed alive by a crocodile at a sideshow. Finding life inside the belly of the beast quite comfortable, he makes a home for himself there. His disquisitions on the state of the world from inside the crocodile make him quite a name for himself; while all the while the discussion rages outside as to whether the beast is going to be cut open to release him or not, its value as a sideshow attraction having massively increased owing to the presence of the human voice buried inside it. One of Jorge Luis Borges' seven most favourite stories. - Summary by Tony Addison

By: Irving Bacheller (1859-1950)

Book cover Prodigal Village; A Christmas Tale

Small town life in early twentieth century New York state. This is a piquant parable of human nature. Bacheller's lightly humorous voice is evident throughout. Not all listeners will agree with the author's view of labor and management. - Summary by david wales

By: Nathan Dane Urner (1839-1893)

Book cover Never: A Handbook For The Uninitiated And Inexperienced Aspirants To Refined Society's Giddy Heights And Glittering Attainments

An 1883 tongue-in-cheek spoof of manners and mannerisms of “society”. ‘the “Open Sesame” to that jealously-guarded realm,—good society,—in which you aspire to circulate freely and shine with becoming luster…. And I, the author of this code of warnings, as truly say unto you, that a contemptuous disregard of the same will be likely to lead you into mortification and embarrassment, if not into being incontinently kicked out of doors…. It will be, in truth, a bosom companion in the happiest sense of the term, a mutely eloquent monitor of deportment, a still, small voice as to what is in good form and what is not.’ - Summary by Book Preface and david wales

By: George Gibbs (1870-1942)

Book cover Maker of Opportunities

When you're tired only because you're bored; and you're bored only because it seems like there's really nothing worth doing; and you're so, so wealthy that one would think opportunity should be knocking at your door every day... you sometimes just have to tell your closer friends how fatiguing the life of he who has everything really is.... And then; you find your calling!

By: P. G. Wodehouse (1881-1975)

Book cover Inimitable Jeeves

When either Bertie Wooster or his friends found themselves in the soup or in dangerous proximity to the tureen, the instinct of one and all was to turn to Jeeves - Bertie's Man. He understood human nature, especially that of gilded youth. It did not matter if the hope of an ancient house had fallen in love with a waitress, or if Bertie's cousins Claude and Eustace had been playing dido; Jeeves never failed. His was a sound brain. The only thing in which Jeeves failed, that is in his master's eyes, was that he could not always go the whole way with him in the matter of spats, socks and ties, particularly in the Spring - Jeeves was a purist...

By: Arthur Wing Pinero (1855-1934)

Book cover Dandy Dick

“Dandy Dick” was the third of the farces which Mr. Pinero wrote for the old Court Theatre—a series of plays which, besides giving playgoers a fresh source of laughter, and the English stage a new order of comic play, brought plentiful prosperity to the joint management of Mr. Arthur Cecil and the late Mr. John Clayton. - Summary by Cast list: The Very Reverend Augustin Jedd, DD, Dean of St Marvells: ToddHW Sir Tristram Mardon, Bart: Son of the Exiles Major Tarver, -th Hussars, quartered at Durnstone near St Marvells: Craig Franklin Mr...

By: Anonymous

Book cover Life of Lazarillo de Tormes (Markham translation)

A whimsical collection of stories about a wandering street urchin, Lazarillo de Tormes is a classic of the Spanish Golden Age, even paid homage in Cervantes’ Don Quixote. Rendered homeless by the arrest of his father and poverty of his mother, the boy Lazarillo has no choice but to go out and find masters to serve. Unfortunately, each of his masters is worse than the one before, and in each case Lazarillo is cast upon his own wits in order to survive. Clever, hungry, and desperate, he always has a sharp eye for lessons on how to outwit the greedy and unscrupulous people who surround him...

By: John Cecil Clay (1875-1930)

Book cover Cupid's Cyclopedia

This 1910 short work is by the English-born American humorist, satirist, and illustrator Oliver Herford, aided by another caricaturist and illustrator, John Cecil Clay. Herford’s books were usually short and quite popular in their time. He is a master of the witty remark and joke, i.e., “Many are called but few get up” and “Only the young die good”. Cupid’s Cyclopedia is a jesting alphabetical list of words and their definitions dealing with the course of true love; the book closes with an essay on the same subject entitled “Amoria,” a tongue-in-cheek imaginative travelogue on “the most ancient and honorable country upon the earth’s surface...

By: Earl Derr Biggers (1884-1933)

Book cover Love Insurance (version 2)

On duty with Lloyds of London in NYC, young Richard Minot is sent to the St Augustine-ish town of San Marco to ensure that a wealthy young lady, Cynthia Meyrick marry his firm's client, Lord Harrowby. Then, in a meet-cute on a slow-moving train, Minot meets the very enticing Miss Meyrick and... reconsiders his duty. - Summary by Matt Pierard

By: T. W. H. Crosland

Book cover Egregious English

This 1903 book is a tongue-in-cheek send-up of English people and subjects. Within the humor , the listener may be surprised by some diamond-hard observations. The listener is also alerted to some attitudes of a different time that would not be acceptable in today's polite discourse. Here writing as “Angus McNeil”, a Scotsman, Crosland was a British author, poet, and journalist .

By: Eden Phillpotts (1862-1960)

Book cover Human Boy Again

Published in 1908, this is a further collection of twelve humorous short stories about English school boys. The author wrote two other books in this series: The Human Boy and The Human Boy And The War . Eden Phillpotts was popular with the reading public and wrote prolifically novels, short stories, poetry, plays, and nonfiction. - Summary by David Wales

By: Frank Gelett Burgess (1886-1951)

Book cover Romance Of The Commonplace

Thirty four whimsical, tongue-in-cheek, and entertaining essays about not much in particular, published in 1902, by one of the most popular writers of the late nineteenth and early twentieth centuries. The American Gelett Burgess was an artist, art critic, poet, author, and humorist. Nonsense verse was a specialty. - Summary by David Wales

By: John Peter Toohey (1879-1946)

Book cover Fresh Every Hour

This book is best described by its subtitle: “DETAILING the Adventures, Comic and Pathetic of one Jimmy Martin, Purveyor of Publicity, a Young Gentleman Possessing Sublime Nerve, Whimsical Imagination, Colossal Impudence, and, Withal the Heart of a Child.” Jimmy, press agent extraordinaire, conjures up outlandish and truth-stretching publicity stunts for an amusement park, theaters and performers, often with unexpected and amusing results. Despite his foibles, Jimmy presses on in pursuit of career success and of pretty Lolita Murphy of Cedar Rapids, Iowa...

By: Eden Phillpotts (1862-1960)

Book cover Deal With The Devil

A Deal with the Devil is a classic tale with a humorous twist. We find that on the night preceeding his 100th birthday Grandpapa, a cantankerous yet loveable sort, has made a deal with the devil, which his granddaughter, in part, will pay. - Summary by Angelique G. Campbell

By: Edward S. Van Zile (1863-1931)

Book cover Perkins, the Fakeer: A Travesty on Reincarnation

As the title suggests we are treated to three humourous and curious psychical transpositions in the cases of "When Reginald was Caroline," "How Chopin came to Remsen," and "Clarissa's troublesome baby" . If you're looking for a break from more serious fare you can count on this one to amuse and entertain you. Summary by Celine Major.

By: Bill Nye (1850-1896)

Book cover Baled Hay: A Drier Book than Walt Whitman's ''Leaves o' Grass''

There can really be no excuse for this last book of trite and beautiful sayings. I do not attempt, in any way, to palliate this great wrong. I would not do so even if I had an idea what palliate meant. . . . I have taken great care to thoroughly eradicate anything that would have the appearance of poetry in this work, and there is not a thought or suggestion contained in it that would soil the most delicate fabric. Do not read it all at once, however, in order to see whether he married the girl or not. Take a little at a time, and it will cure gloom on the "similia simili-bus curanter" principle. - Summary by Bill Nye

By: Ralph Keeler (1840-1873)

Book cover Vagabond Adventures

Ralph Keeler failed as a novelist, but this autobiography reflects a life well-lived with humor and adventure. Keeler was in the same literary circle as satirist Bret Harte, novelist Charles Warren Stoddard, editor Thomas Bailey Aldrich, and essayist William Dean Howells. He so impressed Mark Twain that Twain wrote an essay about him called "Ralph Keeler". In 1873, on his way to Cuba, he reportedly was thrown overboard by a Spanish loyalist who objected to his backing of the revolutionary, anti-Spanish movement. - Summary by John Greenman

By: H. G. Wells (1866-1946)

Book cover Bealby; A Holiday

Bealby is the comical story of the escapade of a thirteen-year-old boy when he rebels against his placement as a steward's-room boy in the great house of an estate named Shonts and flees—not, however, before thoroughly upsetting a weekend party where the nouveau riche couple renting Shonts is entertaining the Lord Chancellor. - Summary by Wikipedia

By: Don Marquis (1878-1937)

Book cover Old Soak, and Hail And Farewell

Published in 1921 , "Hail and Farewell" is a collection of poems in honour of alcohol, drunkenness, and all things related.In "The Old Soak", an old codger grumbles and connives to get alcohol in the age of Prohibition. Part is narrative, and part is installments from The Old Soak's papers. “I'm writing a diary. A diary of the past. A kind of gol-dinged autobiography of what me and Old King Booze done before he went into the grave and took one of my feet with him. In just a little while now there won't be any one in this here broad land of ours, speaking of it geographically, that knows what an old-fashioned barroom was like...

By: Hugh Walpole (1884-1941)

Book cover Jeremy And Hamlet: A Chronicle Of Certain Incidents In The Lives Of A Boy, A Dog, And A Country Town

Hamlet is Jeremy’s dog. This 1923 book is Hugh Walpole’s second volume in his Jeremy semi-autobiographical trilogy , Jeremy at Crale ), about a ten-year-old English boy. One commentator wrote this of the first book: “With affectionate humor, Mr. Walpole tells the story of Jeremy and his two sisters, Helen and Mary Cole, who grow up in Polchester, a quiet English Cathedral town…. Mr. Walpole has given his narrative a rare double appeal, for it not only recreates for the adult the illusion of his own happiest youth, but it unfolds for the child-reader a genuine and moving experience with real people and pleasant things...

By: O. Henry (1862-1910)

Book cover O. Henryana

A book of poems and short stories. - Summary by Fritz

By: Carleton Britton Case

Book cover Stories from the Trenches: Funny Tales the Soldiers Tell

Carleton B. Case is well known for wit and humor, as the title of the book leads one to believe this book will follow suit. - Summary by April6090

By: Henry Wallace Phillips (1869-1930)

Book cover Trolley Folly

This collection of eleven short stories is packed with Henry Wallace Phillips' offbeat humor. You will find a trolley car driver, bored with his route, who decides to drive around town instead. There are a couple of men unfamiliar with the basic properties of a canoe. And watch out for the curse of the chewing gum. Fun to read. Fun to record

By: Frank Thomas Bullen (1857-1915)

Book cover Confessions of a Tradesman

Frank T. Bullen is best known for his books based on his adventures at sea. However, he had a life on shore as well. He first went to sea as a boy as a cabin boy. He there had many adventures as a hand on a whaling ship. He then came ashore and tried his hand at being a "Tradesman". This is that story and also tells how he became the well-known author he is now. It is a very interesting, enjoyable and entertaining depiction of the trials and tribulations he had in his life in 19th century London as a tradesman. - Summary by Wayne Cooke

By: Aldous Huxley (1894-1963)

Book cover Antic Hay

The epigram to this work from Christoher Marlowe applies to the plot of this story: "My men like satyrs grazing on the lawns / Shall with their goat-feet dance the antic hay." The plot follows Huxley and his cohorts in a search for meaning and hope and love in post WWI London.

By: William Makepeace Thackeray (1811-1863)

Book cover Our Street

Written as an autobiographical sketch of a Mr. M.A. Titmarsh, Our Street is a tongue-in-cheek look at English society and the characters who live in the street where he finds himself. It is the second of five "Christmas Books" written by Thackeray under the pseudonym of M.A. Titmarsh.

By: Edith Wharton (1862-1937)

Book cover Old New York

Old New York is a collection of four novellas by Edith Wharton, revolving around upper-class New York City society in the 1840s, 1850s, 1860s, and 1870s. - Summary from Wikipedia

By: P. G. Wodehouse (1881-1975)

Book cover Ukridge

“Do not count your chickens before they are hatched” is a classic saying that might well have been remembered by Ukridge. Ukridge is always on the verge of making a fortune and counting his thousands before they are made. But Dame Fortune is a fickle jade. She eludes him in his great scheme about the dog college, wherein he was to turn out a world supply of trained dogs, and likewise in his backing of Battling Billson, the tender-hearted pugilist. But hope and George Tupper keep Ukridge going. He is ever ready for the next assault. First published as short stories. - Summary by From the introduction

By: W. H. Fawcett (1885-1940)

Book cover Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, Vol 1, No. 11, August, 1920

"Captain Billy's Whiz Bang" was an iconic magazine of wit and humor launched by W.H. Fawcett in 1919. Each 64-page issue was packed with jokes, quips, and humorous bits of writing. Each year it grew in popularity, and Fawcett’s success lead to the formation of the well-known Fawcett Publications, which issued Whiz Comics and introduced Captain Marvel. The magazine was immortalized in a line in the song “Trouble” from Meredith Wilson’s “The Music Man.” - Summary by Larry Wilson

By: P. G. Wodehouse (1881-1975)

Book cover Gentleman of Leisure

A wealthy, love-sick bachelor, crooks, and card-sharps ensconced in an English castle make for a classic Wodehousian comedy of star-crossed lovers, imposters and stolen jewels. It all gets a bit thick, what? - Summary by Mark Nelson

By: W. S. Gilbert (1836-1911)

Book cover Pinafore Picture Book: The Story Of H.M.S. Pinafore (Version 2)

Pinafore’s sublimely silly story is made even sillier by this 1908 story version of the 1878 Gilbert and Sullivan operetta. Gilbert, the author of the operetta’s lyrics, writes this version of the story with his tongue planted firmly in his cheek. Most adults and children will find this version vastly amusing. - Summary by David Wales

By: W. H. Fawcett (1885-1940)

Book cover Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, Vol. 3, No. 28, December, 1921

"Captain Billy's Whiz Bang" was an iconic magazine of American wit and humor launched by W.H. Fawcett in 1919. Each 64-page issue is packed with jokes, quips, and humorous bits of writing. Each year it grew in popularity, and Fawcett’s success lead to the formation of the well-known Fawcett Publications, which issued "Whiz Comics" and introduced Captain Marvel. The magazine was immortalized in a line in the song “Trouble” from Meredith Wilson’s “The Music Man.” - Summary by Larry Wilson

By: Agnes Repplier (1855-1950)

Book cover Essays in Idleness

Agnes Repplier was a popular and highly regarded essayist of the late 19th and early 20th century, who was also well known on the lecture circuit. Her writings are witty, erudite, and engaging. The eight essays in this collection include an homage to her cat Aggripina and reflections on the beauty of words, as well as essays entitled "The Children's Poets," "The Praises of War," "Leisure," "Ennui," "Wit and Humor," and "Letters." - Summary by Ciufi Galeazzi

By: W. H. Fawcett (1885-1940)

Book cover Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, Vol. 2, No. 23, August, 1921

"Captain Billy's Whiz Bang" was an iconic magazine of American wit and humor launched by W.H. Fawcett in 1919. Each 64-page issue is packed with jokes, quips, and humorous bits of writing. Each year it grew in popularity, and Fawcett’s success lead to the formation of the well-known Fawcett Publications, which issued "Whiz Comics" and introduced Captain Marvel. The magazine was immortalized in a line in the song “Trouble” from Meredith Wilson’s “The Music Man.” - Summary by Larry Wilson

By: Palmer Cox (1840-1924)

Book cover Frontier Humor in Verse, Prose and Picture

Also known for his "Brownies" books, Canadian humorist Palmer Cox give us a delightful collection of humorous verse and short prose vignettes. From the publisher's preface, "thrice happy is the man who, having seen, can tell the fun; and having told, can picture it for others’ eyes and so roll on the rollicking humor, for the brightening of a world already far too sad." - Summary by Larry Wilson

By: W. H. Fawcett (1885-1940)

Book cover Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, Vol. 2. No. 13, October, 1920

"Captain Billy's Whiz Bang" was an iconic magazine of American wit and humor launched by W.H. Fawcett in 1919. Each 64-page issue is packed with jokes, quips, and humorous bits of writing. Each year it grew in popularity, and Fawcett’s success lead to the formation of the well-known Fawcett Publications, which issued "Whiz Comics" and introduced Captain Marvel. The magazine was immortalized in a line in the song “Trouble” from Meredith Wilson’s “The Music Man.” - Summary by Larry Wilson

By: Richmal Crompton (1890-1969)

Book cover Still - William

More humorous adventures by the world’s most misunderstood English boy. - Summary by david wales

By: Ellis Parker Butler (1869-1937)

Book cover Swatty: A Story of Real Boys

The fun adventures of Georgie, Swatty, and Bony, as they encounter flooding rivers, emotional girls, burning buildings, rotten stumps, mean teachers, a haunted house, dark caves, murderers, and ice jams.

By: W. H. Fawcett (1885-1940)

Book cover Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, Vol. 2. No. 16, January, 1921

"Captain Billy's Whiz Bang" was an iconic magazine of American wit and humor launched by W.H. Fawcett in 1919. Each 64-page issue is packed with jokes, quips, and humorous bits of writing. Each year it grew in popularity, and Fawcett’s success lead to the formation of the well-known Fawcett Publications, which issued "Whiz Comics" and introduced Captain Marvel. The magazine was immortalized in a line in the song “Trouble” from Meredith Wilson’s “The Music Man.” - Summary by Larry Wilson

By: Dorothy Parker (1893-1967)

Book cover Men I'm Not Married To (Version 2)

Dorothy Parker was a poet, writer and satirist of the foibles of the early 20th century , and a founding member of New York’s Algonquin Round Table, a group of prominent artistic and social critics, actors and wits. This is a short collection of humorously critical descriptions of various men on the periphery of her “inner circle,” which explain why they are men she is not married to. - Summary by Kirsten Wever

By: Alice Duer Miller (1874-1942)

Book cover Priceless Pearl

Pearl Leavitt is habitually fired from her New York City office jobs for being "too beautiful" and thereby causing all the men to fall in love with her. Fed up, she decides to take a job in the Hamptons as a governess for three over-indulged children. - Summary by Nancy Halper

By: Aldous Huxley (1894-1963)

Book cover Mortal Coils

Aldous Huxley is best known as a philosopher and novelist – notably as the author of Brave New World. He also wrote poetry, short stories and critical essays. Most of his work is somewhat dark and mildly sardonic, partly because he came of age just after World War I, when all of Europe was in a state of cultural, political and social confusion. His novel, Crome Yellow, is a prime example. Mortal Coils includes four short stories and a play, including one of the author’s most famous short works: "The Gioconda Smile." - Summary by Kirsten Wever

By: Ellis Parker Butler (1869-1937)

Book cover In Pawn

Inspired by "Lives of the Saints", fat, lazy, good-for-nothing Harvey Redding decides to give up the junk-collecting business, and become a Saint. Meanwhile, deeply in debt to his sister, he has left his son Lem with her until he is able to pay her back.

By: Richmal Crompton (1890-1969)

Book cover William -- The Fourth

The world’s most confident, most chaos-creating eleven year old boy is at it again in these fourteen glorious and funny 1924 short stories. - Summary by David Wales

By: Hugh McHugh (1867-1926)

Book cover Down The Line with John Henry

A humorous comedy of errors and light-hearted wit in the life of the likeable John Henry. When it comes to betting at the races, booze, his friends, and his woman Clara Jane, it's never a dull moment. The Hot-Air Association is in full session! Will Clara continue to go "down the line" with John Henry?


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