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Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 103, July 23, 1892   By:

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PUNCH,

OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

VOL. 103.

July 23, 1892.

[Illustration: TOO CLEVER BY HALF.

"AND WHERE DID YOU LEARN TO SPEAK ENGLISH SO WELL?"

"FROM LADY JENKINSON'S CHILDREN, MADAME. I CAME OVER FROM SWITZERLAND TO TEACH THEM FRENCH AND GERMAN!"

"AND DID THEY LEARN FRENCH AND GERMAN?"

"NO, MADAME, NOT A WORD!"]

TO A SUMMER FLOWER.

Oh, lovely flower sent from afar, Like sunlight to this world of ours, What art thou but a golden star, A priceless gem amongst the flowers?

Alas, all earthly things must die, Thou, too, fair yellow flower must fade, Thou wilt not charm an Artist's eye, Upon the breast of some fair maid!

Ah, no, thine is a nobler fate, Unlike the lily or the rose, Thou passest to a higher state When in sad death thy petals close:

For then thine outward form, grown pale Is changed to what, at first scarce seen, Is still thyself, so fair, so frail, A little fruit of tender green!

When quite matured, how very choice Thy juicy flavour; who can then Sing all thy worth with mortal voice, Or write thy praise with mortal pen.

There, take it gently from the ground, O costermonger, to thy barrow, And shout, with loud discordant sound, The praise of Vegetable Marrow!

ROE, BLOATER'S ROE.

Faintly it wakes at the even chime, The appetite long past its prime. The supper room at the Club looks dim. What shall I "peck" for an epicure's whim? Roe, Bloater's Roe! That's the brief repast To tickle the palate, to break the fast!

They may prate of the pleasures of "early purl," Of the frizzled rasher's seductive curl, But, when I fear I can munch no more, When the thought of banquets becomes a bore, Roe, Bloater's Roe, upon toast they cast, And nausea's fled, and repletion's past!

Yes Bloater's Roe upon toast. Ah, boon! That stayeth satiety, late or soon. Best of bonnes bouches , that all seasons fits! The tenderest tickler of all tit bits! Roe, Bloater's Roe! O chef , grill fast, And prepare my palate its pet repast!

ONE FORM OF A "SHELLEY MEMORIAL." Awful indigestion the morning after a Lobster Supper.

FROM DAY TO DAY.

( A STUDY IN POLITICAL JOURNALISM, FROM SOME OF THE MORNING PAPERS. )

NO. I.

To day, the first pollings of the General Election take place, and the electors will be called upon to decide one of the most momentous issues that have ever been submitted to the judgment of the country. For ourselves, we cannot doubt for a moment as to what the verdict will be. It is impossible that a policy of empty promises, backed by mere misrepresentation, should prevail against a glorious record of administrative, legislative, and financial success. Careful calculations have convinced us that those who now hold the reins of office will return to power with a largely increased majority, to continue their beneficent work. The country recognises by this time that anything short of that would mean disaster to the commonwealth. Even with a small majority, the forces of disorder would be able to work untold mischief. Such a result, however, is not within the bounds of possibility, seeing that the Election will be fought purely and simply on the Irish question, which has been placed fully before the electorate in all its bearings. Our organisation is perfect, and our triumph assured.

NO. II. ( THREE DAYS LATER .)

We are constrained to admit that, so far, the result of the Elections has not come up to the confident anticipations of our Party. Seats have been lost that ought to have been retained. On the other hand, we have failed to win seats that we had a right to count upon as certainties. It is not easy to apportion the responsibility for failure. Over confidence and a consequent want of energy may have had something to do with it; but the chief reason is to be found in the disgracefully defective organisation of the Party... Continue reading book >>


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