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Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 156, May 28, 1919   By:

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PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

VOL. 156.

May 28, 1919.

[Illustration: "AUSTRIAE EST IMPERARE ORBI UNIVERSO".

ONCE UPON A TIME.

TO DAY.]

CHARIVARIA.

It was the pig, says an eminent Danish economist, that lost Germany the War. His omission to specify which pig seems almost certain to provoke further recriminations among the German High Command.

After all, the War may have wakened a new spirit in the nation. Up to the time of writing no one has attempted to corner mint sauce.

A movement, we hear, is on foot to give a public welcome to the cheeses on their return to our midst. It is thought that a march past could easily be arranged.

Hackney will supply electricity to consumers at a special rate during the Peace celebrations. The present price of one and sixpence per kilowatt and soda practically inhibits anything like deep seated festivity.

A Miners' Association in the North has decided not to establish a weekly newspaper. Pending other arrangements they will do a little light mining, but it must not be taken as a precedent.

At a meeting of Hassocks allotment holders a speaker stated that he had seen rabbits jump a fence five feet high. Experts declare that this is at least three feet over proof.

As the outcome of suggestions by the Economy Committee at Eton Dr. ALINGTON has made certain restrictions in regard to various articles of dress, notably socks and mufflers. Henceforward only such socks as do not require muffling will be worn.

The cow that walked into the lending library at Walton Heath has since explained that it merely wanted to look up "Manchuria" in the encyclopaedia.

It is said that the question of neutrality has caused most of the delay in the formation of the League of Nations. We certainly realise the difficulty in deciding how Norway and Switzerland could come to grips, in the event of a War between these two countries, without infringing the laws of neutrality.

"No harm to the moon will result from the eclipse of the sun on May 28th," states a writer in an evening paper. This is good news for those who have mining shares there.

There is a falling off in the tanning of kids in India, says The Shoe and Leather Trades Record . Smith minor talks of migrating to the Orient.

Government ale, says a trade paper, will shortly be on sale in some parts of Ireland. This certainly ought to be a lesson to them.

Two Parisians who had previously arranged to fight a duel have refused to meet. It is supposed that they have quarrelled.

As we go to press we are informed on good authority that the cat that developed rabies last week has now been successfully killed eight times, and it is expected that its final execution will have taken place by the time this appears in print.

We understand that the Tredegar Fire Brigade strike is settled. Patrons are asked to bear with the Brigade, who have promised to work off arrears of fires in strict rotation.

A Surrey Church magazine appeals for funds to renovate the church exits. For ourselves, if we were a parson, we shouldn't worry about getting people out of church so long as we got them in.

A Scottish Chamber of Commerce has passed a resolution in favour of smaller One Pound Treasury Notes. If at the same time they could be made a bit cheaper the movement would be a popular one.

A taxi driver who knocked down a pedestrian in Edgware Road and then drove off has been summoned. His defence is that he mistook the unfortunate man for an intending fare.

The Northumberland Miners' Council has passed a resolution calling on the Government to evacuate our troops from Russia, drop the Conscription Bill, remove the blockade and release conscientious objectors. Their silence on the subject of Dalmatia is being much commented on... Continue reading book >>


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